#newp.s.

[etching-bones]

It takes months, but Summer returns to me. Warmth pooling in my bones, drifting in tendrils through my blood, A burning song caught in my hair, a crown of vibrancy reclaimed- Giddy twirl, flower petal storm, A heart that brims and overflows with /hope/. Golden I turn, burnished in light, Smiling I am, leaning to the sky- The sun bows down to kiss me.

Come, I beckon with scar speckled hands, Laughter caught between my lips and teeth and  Bright and wild in my eyes, Dancing, dancing- My feet know not where to land, for I have lost my form, I have become music, Irrepressible and without a name, Flitting through the trees and grinning as you follow. Tongue leaden in your mouth, Exhilaration a swirl of stars over your irises- Snatch me up and kiss me.

Contentment keeps creeping around my face, Rocks underfoot and shells pressed against my legs, Iced coffee at my lips, your voice ringing in my ears. There's a slither of heaven on this earth, and it exists pressed into you, Your salt sprayed skin,  Your steady soft touch, Keep me grounded and hold me. 

Here's a truth, my sweetling, my love, I do not lose myself when I lie here with you. I find myself, waiting, curled up by a fire, Drowsy and content and easy in my skin.  (And it's so difficult, for me) (To bear to you my back) And my heartbeat is exhilarated, stumbling on in a staccato tune, And my mind is calm, slumbering, You coax it into submission, You are becoming my home.

This is such a convoluted way to say that I love you.

But I love you. I love you. I love you.

[mylovesurreal]

Loved by Creation

She is in a lot of Pain

She has no hope for Humanity

She is over the concept of Hope

Drinks to numb her reality

Which poisons her body

Her mind is ill

Her heart has been frozen

Since the day her father walked away

Mistreated as a child

Made her age quickly

She forgot who she is

What makes her happy

She is too far down the road

The one that has kept her safe

But not sound.

She believes this is the only road for her

Although she knows there are many others

Even if she could change her destiny

Is it too late to turn back?

To turn back will be to admit that she was wrong

About Everything

Afraid to see the Truth straight in the eyes with a sober mind

To see God

And reveal her Soul

She just wants to be Free

But Confused and Numb

She doesn’t know that Angels are all around her

Have been with her since she was born

And even before she was conceived

She is Loved by Creation

And not a mistake

You are Loved by Creation

You are not a mistake.

-Diana Vu

[etching-bones]

Once, we knew each other in casual terms.  You were a friend of a friend, Then a friend of a lover, Then a grief stitched into their increasingly scabbed skin. I took you on, as I took on most their pains, though naturally I took more care with you.  Flesh and blood, you were, unlike the usual Conceptual agony, which was Tangible and Painful but  Impossible to hurt.

...

In sweet contrast, you had mellow bones and a delicate mind, That yearned to be supple but was too breathtakingly thin. If you were pushed, you would just tear apart, Millions of fibres ripping away from each other. A gorgeous, quiet, break.  All you wanted to be was whole.

...

And that's how we made each other feel, wasn't it?  Unbroken and whole and veined with light, I remember how it felt to see you, that first time, my heart plaintive in my chest, How we lay down and stared and scarcely dared breathe,  And kissed,  Kissed, Kissed.

...

And you took on my mind You ran with its tormenting tongues until you understood, Then taught me, That my mind is not a beast at all, but a roving storm, bridging the divide between land and sea, Or the heavens themselves, gilded with lightning, Something exquisite, and magnificent, and worthy, Something to be touched, and held, and hallowed. 

...

But things that are exquisite, and magnificent, and worthy, Do not cope well with being left behind. They seethe, they rage,  They cut themselves from those who would leave them drowning.

...

I waited for you too long, the stars spell out this truth: You ruined us, this condemnation: You did not deserve me, and this absolute: I do not forgive you.

[etching-bones]

[etching-bones]

She was beautiful

Embossed skin and rich coffee eyes, That glimmered and invited and hid everything in clear sight. (shadows and smudges and comet-streak lines) Bright and Gold, Like sun struck bronze-

But no, no. That was wrong. Her eyes were often dark. Dark and crooning, soft with a lullaby, Draped in a tender mist. She moved with a stilted caution, nervous, She was,  Anxious not to misplace her touch-

But look, look.  Do you see? She changes again, (Though the beauty remains), Compulsive, she becomes animation, Hands askance, she moves beyond herself. Her thoughts become dandelion seeds caught by every breeze and her mind is a tumbled gem- Smooth and cool, riddled with imperfections that glitter in the light, Unassuming, brilliant in the palm, translucent-

(Hand to her the sun)

And she smiles, an explosion of light across every synapse-

(The sun)

She laughs, and I am wrapped up in the trembling folds of her voice, I flush at the medley, I am at ease in your happiness. 

Your happiness. You. Flustered grins and heart gritty with stardust, Let me bring to you the sun.

[etching-bones]

[etching-bones]

[etching-bones]

Forgive me, for I have sinned, Against my own, my body, my mind Driven into this fucking rut by my refusal to compromise, Admit weakness, Or rest. Forgive me, for I have sinned, Against my blood, my flesh, my skin Sliced open and carved into neatly spaced lines, Deconstruct me, Deconstruct me, I am becoming hollow again. Forgive me, for I have sinned, Against my being, my mind, my creations Twisted up and contorted, I dwell on dreams until they corrode into nightmares, Are they beautiful or only broken? I forsake them either way. Forgive me, for I am tired, Of waiting of pushing of waking up With eyes still stinging or Returning a smile that aches like a bruise. There are no pretty words for exhaustion, no sentence that can turn a haggard face desirable- I live on a cyclic basis,  Crawling back up again just to fall apart at the seams while perfecting pretending predetermined perfection- Fuck this. Fuck this. I just want to stop. Forgive me, for I have sinned, Again and again and again.