This is my first fic written on Tumblr and my first fic in the DC fandom. I’ve been lurking and sorry if nothing’s all that canon accurate I’ve only really read the fan fictions on Ao3 this was idea was inspired by this post
Fic under the cut.
BREAKING NEWS: BRUCE WAYNE ON TUMBLR?!
Last night Bruce Wayne attended President Lex Luthor’s gala. According to online sources one young socialite commented on Mr. Wayne’s shoelaces and his response? His response was the tumblr famous, “Thanks I stole them from the President.”
That seemed to be the headline going around the morning after Bruce had infiltrated Luthor’s gala. He had arrived in his bat-suit not planning to actually attend the party as Brucie. Then he had lost sight of Luthor and his newest partner in crime so he went in to investigate.
Breaking into the building was easy. Finding a suit was a little harder but still manageable. It was a spare suit Luther had in one of his offices. He quickly changed out of the bat-suit and into the stolen suit. Bruce hid the bat-suit and joined the party.
Two minutes into the gala he regained sight on Luthor and his newest companion. Five minutes in he was approached by the first socialite. Thirty minutes in was when the line that started it all was said.
“I like your shoelaces,” commented a young man, no older than Dick at the oldest, offhandedly.
“Thanks, I stole them from the president,” Bruce replied before he could think it through completely.
The boy stared at him in shock for a moment. For a second Bruce thought he had taken it literally and he would have to come up with an excuse, but the man just smiled and walked away. It was definitely one of the weirdest interactions Bruce has had so far.
There were no further incidents that night, but when he got home the next morning the couple of his children who were in the manor and awake watched him with an expression of shock and awe.
Namely it was Tim, Cass, and Dick. The last who had broken his arm on patrol three weeks ago and was confined to the manor by Alfred.
Tim looked up from the computer on which he was typing something when Bruce walked in. And Cass’s eyes were wide as she watched Bruce.
“B?” Dick asked after a few silent moments of the three staring at Bruce. “Are you on Tumblr?”
“What?” Bruce replied confused. When Dick had spoken Tim had switched tabs and was typing furiously on his keyboard.
“Do you have Tumblr?” Dick asked again slower.
“No?” Bruce was still confused and his kids seemed to be having some sort of existential crisis.
“Yeah well, hate to say this but Bruce Wayne is trending on Tumblr right now along with the tag Tumblr’s Batman.” Tim interrupted.
“This happened like eight hours ago.”
Tim shrugs and takes a sip of his energy drink, “Tumblr works fast. You should see it when Ao3 goes down for five minutes.”
If Bruce’s thoughts could be seen right now he’s sure that they’re might be a giant question mark floating above his head.
About ten hours of research later and Bruce could say he was still thoroughly confused on how Tumblr works but he could now understand that it might be useful occasionally. He stares at the sign-up screen for a long moment before closing out of it. Making one now after all of this has gone down would be suspicious. Maybe he can commander one from one of his children who may have preexisting accounts.
Meanwhile on Tumblr
Tim watched the chaos going down as people frantically searched for Bruce Wayne’s account on Tumblr. Not that he himself wasn’t also searching for it. He really wanted to know if his adopted dad followed him and had seen some of his shitposts that were meant to never see the light of day after they had been posted. What happens on Tumblr stays on Tumblr.
Five minutes later reveals to the rest of the Bats that Bruce genuinely had no idea what he started with his reply and now felt it was too late to admit to the fact he does and not and never has had tumblr. Ten minutes later sees Cass volunteering to let Bruce use her account. There’s a reason she’s Bruce’s favorite. It’s because of times like this when all the rest of his children are laughing their asses off at him, but Cass is actually more subtle about it.
