#noobtiedoo

[noobtiedoo]

Villain: Ehm... how fast can you run?

Hero: *already sighing* why?

Villain: That last explosion was a little bigger than I calculated. So....

Hero: So?

Villain: It triggered an avalanche.

Hero: Are you kidding me?! I thought you learned your lesson after the volcanic erruption!

Villain: I'm a slow learner, okay?!

Hero: Clearly!

[noobgifs]

“From the Sea they rise. Gods of old. To bring the tide.“

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[noobtiedoo]

Hero: give me one good reason why I would go out with you.

Villain: I can fold a fitted sheet.

Hero: ... fair enough

[noobtiedoo]

"Huh..."

"What?"

"You actually have a heartbeat."

"Of course I do. I'm not dead."

"With how cold and uncaring you are, you could have fooled me."

[noobtiedoo]

"You know, I expected something a little more romantic. Like a bouquet of flowers."

"What? Is a death threat not romantic enough for you? Sorry, if this doesn't kill you, I'll hide a bomb in a box of chocolates. "

"Really?"

"No! What is wrong with you?!"

[noobtiedoo]

"I want you-..."

"You can have me anyway you want, baby."

"..- to roll over and die, you asshole."

"Oh.... well, except that way."

[noobtiedoo]

"It's not fair that every time I try to get over you, and I think I have nearly succeeded, you do something, show me a smile or hold my hand, in a way that has me falling for you all over again."

[noobtiedoo]

Every time I see you, I feel the cold fingers of fear stroking up my spine, clawing at my throat, squeezing tight until I feel like I can't breathe. I feel my blood freeze in my veins, and my mind warning me not to get any closer. I never listen. And I can't stay away. Maybe I don't want to be safe. Maybe I just want to be yours regardless of the pain. It's like I'm courting death, and I already know our wedding will be my funeral.