it's not an angry kind of feeling , because milo is able to suppress most of it when he returns , and it doesn't exactly feel like sadness either. it's more like disbelief , and pure confusion. as if it's supposed to be a joke. a fever dream. zack will tell him soon enough that none of it is true , right ?
so why does it feel like his heart is nearly beating out of his chest ? it's too tight , his ribcage , and it hurts. his movements are slow , dreading to face his boyfriend and making it come true. feet shuffle towards zack's room , where he finds him behind his computer. '' i'm back , '' he announces himself as he slowly approaches zack. the plastic bag filled with snacks from his late night run to the store in one hand , a couple of papers in the other hand. he drops the plastic bag on the ground , and carelessly drops the papers on the desk.
'' your dad was in the parking lot. you weren't answering his calls , he said , '' milo feels like throwing up already , and exhales a huge sigh that doesn't elevate even a single bit of anxiety. his entire body feels like it's going to cramp up , and he wants to curl himself into a ball on the ground. '' he gave me the restraining order , for my dad. he said you would know what to do. ''
milo takes a small step back , a hand coming up to place upon his chest , rubbing the space there for any sense of serenity. '' a-and that you could stop giving him money now. '' his head starts to spin now that he's said it all , and it still does not make sense to him. '' zack ... '' milo quietly says , '' what — what is this ? i-i don't understand. ''
