The actor, 86, will be most remembered on this website for the "Chuck Norris Facts" memes of hyper-exaggerated competence.
Outside of movies and memes, Norris was a longtime conservative activist: pushing back against LGBT inclusion, fearmongering about peaceful Muslims spreading "sharia law", arguing against states teaching evolution in schools, feeding the "birther" conspiracy that Obama was not a US Citizen, spreading a conspiracy that the US military under Obama was going to put Texas under martial law, and supporting Donald Trump.
the afterparty / lando norris x singer reader
syn: lando norris gets caught liking a singer's instagram post—it all escalates from there.
a/n: this was so fun to make!! hope you enjoy as much as i did creating <3
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y/nl/n see u @ the afterparty
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luvl/n IS THIS A TEASER FOR A NEW ALBUM??
user1231923490 not everything's a spoiler yk
luvl/n yeah but it might be!!
spotlightdaily See you there!
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louderthanyourfavs_ WHAT DOES THIS MEAN??
user12391873 does anyone else see lando norris in the likes or am i tripping bruh
contains audio 'afterparty' — y/nl/n
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lando lit week
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mclaren Can't wait for this weekend 🔥
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y/nl/n damn what's that song?
lando one of the greatest
user123897192 ANOTHER y/n and lando interaction what does this mean omg
olliebearman well well well...
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maxfewtrell tickets yes or no
lando hellll yeah
iluvlandonorris TICKETS FOR WHAT???
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y/nl/n insane tn. love you guys always x
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user138129831 are we gonna ignore the fact half the f1 grid was there
carlossainz55 🔥🔥🔥
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allabt_y/nl/n f1 x y/n collab when?
y/nl/n @f1 hmu
contains audio 'girl of the hour' — y/n l/n
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y/nl/n 4m today <3
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mclaren Looks like one of ours strayed 🧐
y/nl/n come and get him he's trying to forge my signature
lando would you say 4's your lucky number?
y/nl/n more like 81
lando oh c'monnn
user129387129 SOFT LAUNCH!! (?)
contains audio 'kiss me in the crowd' — y/n l/n
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y/nl/n party's just started
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lando and who's hosting the afterparty??
Summery: Lando starts his stream with max but there’s someone who steals the show, just by sleeping.
——-The stream went live with the familiar soft click of Lando’s keyboard and the low hum of his PC fans. Monaco was quiet tonight—late enough that the lights from the harbor flickered lazily through the glass doors behind him, the city glowing gold and blue in the distance.
“Alright,” Lando said, leaning toward the mic as the viewer count climbed quickly. “Hi. Um—before anyone says anything, we’re keeping the vibes chill tonight, yeah?”
That alone set the chat off.
CHAT:
WHY ARE WE WHISPERING
CHILL VIBES????
HE SAID UM ITS OVER
SHES THERE ISNT SHE
Lando smiled to himself, eyes flicking briefly to the side.
Just out of frame, pushed right up against his desk like it always was, the couch was occupied. His girlfriend was curled on her side, wearing his hoodie that was swallowed by the blanket she’d dragged from the bedroom. One cheek pressed into the cushion, hair a little messy from when she’d flopped down earlier with a tired, “I’ll just lie here for a sec.”
That sec had turned into sleep.
Her hand was still in his.
She’d reached for him without opening her eyes while he was setting up the stream, fingers sliding into his palm like muscle memory. Now, as she slept, her grip had softened—still there, but loose, warm, trusting.
Lando adjusted his chair just slightly closer so their hands wouldn’t stretch.
“Max is joining in a minute,” he added quietly. “But—uh—inside voices.”
The chat barely heard him over itself.
CHAT:
HAND???
WAIT IS THAT HER HAND
LANDO NORRIS YOU CANNOT DO THIS TO US
Max Fewtrell popped into the call a moment later, camera on, sitting in his London flat with a mug in hand. “Evening, ladies and gentlemen—why are you whispering like you’re in a library?”
“Oi,” Lando said immediately, turning his mic gain down a touch. “Shh.”
Max blinked. “What?”
“She’s asleep,” Lando said, nodding subtly toward the couch.
Understanding dawned on Max’s face, and his grin softened. “Oh. Right. My bad.”
CHAT:
MAX IMMEDIATELY COMPLYING
AS HE SHOULD
SHE’S ASLEEP HOLDING HIS HAND IM GONNA CRY
As the game loaded, Lando leaned back slightly, eyes drifting to her again. Her breathing had slowed, chest rising and falling in that deep, even rhythm that meant she was properly out.
Her fingers twitched once.
Then, slowly, her hand started to slip from his.
Lando noticed instantly.
Mid-sentence, he paused, gently curling his fingers around hers again, thumb brushing the side of her hand. Her grip reformed on instinct, fingers lacing with his this time.
The chat lost it.
CHAT:
THE WAY HE FIXED IT
SHE GRABBED BACK
THEYVE BEEN TOGETHER SINCE KIDS YOUR HONOR
She shifted slightly, face turning toward him. A lock of hair fell forward, tickling her cheek. Lando watched it for a second, then carefully lifted his free hand, slow and deliberate so he wouldn’t wake her.
With the gentlest motion, he tucked the strand behind her ear.
His fingers lingered for half a second longer than necessary.
Max cleared his throat dramatically. “Just so you know, you’re being extremely visible right now.”
Lando glanced at the camera, smirked faintly. “Yeah. They’ll live.”
CHAT:
HAIR TUCKED. STREAM OVER.
BOYFRIEND CODED SINCE DAY ONE
THIS IS MORE INTIMATE THAN DTS
She murmured something unintelligible, brow creasing slightly before smoothing out again. Her grip tightened, and she tugged his hand closer, pressing it against her chest like she needed the reassurance even in her sleep.
Lando leaned toward her, whispering, “I’ve got you.”
Then he looked back at the screen like nothing monumental had just happened.
Gameplay continued. Max talked. Chat spammed. But every few minutes, something small would happen—her thumb brushing his knuckle, her shifting closer, Lando adjusting the blanket when it slipped.
At one point, she stirred properly, eyes fluttering open just a crack.
“You done yet?” she mumbled sleepily.
“Not yet,” Lando whispered, smiling down at her. “Go back to sleep.”
She nodded once, blindly reaching for his hand again even though she already had it.
“Okay,” she said softly, and was out again within seconds.
The chat absolutely imploded.
CHAT:
HER VOICE???
IM NOT OKAY
THE WAY HE SPOKE TO HER
THIS IS WHY FANS LOVE HER
Max leaned back in his chair, shaking his head. “You’re never beating the allegations.”
“What allegations?” Lando asked.
“That you’re the softest man alive.”
Lando shrugged, eyes still on her. “I’m alright with that.”
When the stream finally wound down, Lando thanked chat quietly, promised another stream soon, and ended it without fanfare.
He didn’t move for a long moment afterward.
Instead, he turned his chair fully toward the couch, careful not to pull away. With his free hand, he brushed his knuckles over her cheek.
She smiled in her sleep.
And for Lando Norris, world of racing and noise fading into the background, there was nowhere else he’d rather be.
Lando noticed it the moment he stepped inside, keys tossed onto the marble counter with a soft clink that echoed far louder than it should have. He kicked off his shoes, stretched, and glanced around like something was missing.
“Well,” he muttered to himself, “this is boring.”
From the bedroom, his girlfriend’s voice floated out. “You’re the one who insisted we wait!”
“I didn’t insist,” Lando shot back, already walking toward her. “I suggested. There’s a difference.”
She appeared in the doorway, arms folded, trying—and failing—not to smile. “You said—and I quote—‘We should be responsible adults and think this through.’”
He winced. “Okay, yeah. That does sound like me. But in my defense, I didn’t know it would feel this… empty.”
She raised an eyebrow. “Empty? We’ve lived here for months.”
“Yeah, but now I know what we’re missing.”
She tilted her head, pretending to consider. “A better coffee machine?”
“Hey. Don’t insult the coffee machine.”
“A second TV?”
“Blasphemy.”
She stepped closer, eyes softening. “You mean the puppy.”
Lando didn’t even try to hide his grin. “The puppy.”
For weeks, they’d gone back and forth—breeds, timing, travel schedules, the chaos of his racing calendar. Every practical concern had been discussed at least three times. And yet somehow, the decision had come down to something far less logical.
They just wanted one.
“Are you still sure?” she asked quietly. “Because once we do this—”
“There’s no going back,” he finished. “Yeah, I know.” He reached for her hand. “I’m sure. Are you?”
She looked at him for a long moment, then nodded. “I’ve been sure since the first time you sent me that photo at 2 a.m.”
He laughed. “He had floppy ears! What was I supposed to do—ignore that?”
“Sleep, maybe.”
“Overrated.”
She squeezed his hand. “Okay. Then let’s do it.”
—
The drive felt longer than it actually was.
Lando tapped his fingers against the steering wheel, glancing over at her every few seconds like he needed confirmation this was real.
“You’re nervous,” she said.
“I’m not nervous.”
“You’ve checked the GPS five times in the last two minutes.”
“Traffic updates are important.”
She smirked. “You’re meeting a puppy, not qualifying.”
“Same pressure.”
“Lando.”
“Okay, fine. I’m a little nervous.”
She reached across the center console and laced her fingers with his. “He’s going to love you.”
“What if he doesn’t?” Lando said, only half joking. “What if he looks at me and thinks, ‘Nah, not this guy’?”
“Then we’ll get a different one.”
He gasped dramatically. “Excuse me? Traitor.”
She laughed. “Relax. It’s a puppy. It’ll probably try to eat your shoelaces within ten seconds.”
“Great. I’ve always wanted to be disrespected by someone that small.”
“You already are,” she teased. “By me.”
“Wow.”
—
The place was quieter than Lando expected.
A small, cozy house just outside the city, with a garden that looked like it had been designed specifically for chaos—perfect for a growing dog. The breeder greeted them warmly, leading them inside.
And then Lando heard it.
Soft, high-pitched yips. Tiny paws skittering against the floor.
“Oh no,” he whispered.
“What?” she asked, but then she saw them too.
A cluster of puppies tumbled over each other in a playpen, all energy and clumsy enthusiasm. One chased its own tail. Another tried to climb over its siblings and failed spectacularly.
Lando’s entire face lit up.
“I want all of them,” he said immediately.
“That’s not how this works.”
“But look at them!”
“I am looking at them. We’re getting one.”
“Two?”
“Lando.”
“Okay, okay. One.”
The breeder smiled knowingly. “Do you want to come closer?”
They both nodded.
The moment the gate opened, chaos spilled out. Tiny paws, wagging tails, curious noses.
Lando crouched down, laughing as one immediately tried to climb onto his knee. “Hi, mate—oh, you’re bold, aren’t you?”
Another puppy sniffed his shoe, then attempted to chew the laces.
“Told you,” she said, crouching beside him.
“Yeah, yeah.” He gently redirected the puppy. “Not food, sorry.”
She reached out, letting a smaller, quieter one approach her at its own pace. “This one’s shy.”
Lando glanced over. The puppy hesitated, then slowly rested its paw on her hand.
“Oh,” she whispered. “Hi, baby.”
Something shifted in Lando’s expression.
“Okay,” he said softly. “That’s the one.”
She looked up. “Really?”
“Yeah.” He nodded toward the puppy now cautiously climbing into her lap. “Look at him. He’s already chosen you.”
She smiled, but there was something emotional in it. “You don’t want to meet the others?”
“I mean, they’re all amazing,” Lando said. “But… this one feels right.”
As if on cue, the puppy turned its head and looked straight at him.
“Okay, now he’s chosen you too,” she said.
“Perfect. Mutual agreement.”
—
The ride home was very different.
Instead of nervous energy, there was a soft, contented quiet. The puppy—now officially theirs—sat curled up in her lap, occasionally lifting its head to look around before settling back down.
Lando kept glancing over.
“You’re going to crash if you keep staring,” she warned.
“I’m not staring.”
“You just drifted into the other lane.”
“I did not—okay, maybe a little.”
She laughed. “Eyes on the road, dad.”
“Dad,” he repeated, grinning. “I like that.”
The puppy shifted, letting out a tiny yawn.
“Oh my god,” Lando said. “Did you see that?”
“Yes, Lando. Puppies yawn.”
“No, but that was the cutest yawn in the history of yawns.”
She shook her head. “You’re gone. Completely gone.”
“Absolutely,” he agreed.
—
Back at the apartment, the silence was gone.
Replaced by the soft patter of paws, the occasional bark, and Lando’s constant commentary.
“No, no, that’s not for chewing—hey! Okay, maybe a little chewing.”
“Lando,” she called from the kitchen, “did you give him one of your socks?”
“He took it!”
“That’s your fault.”
“I was attacked!”
She walked in to find Lando sprawled on the floor, the puppy enthusiastically climbing all over him.
“You look ridiculous,” she said fondly.
“I feel attacked,” he said, though he was laughing.
The puppy paused, then flopped down against his chest like it had found its spot.
Lando froze.
“Don’t move,” she whispered, grabbing her phone.
“I wasn’t planning to,” he said softly.
For a moment, everything stilled.
The noise, the chaos, the laughter—it all settled into something quieter, something warmer.
He looked at her over the tiny bundle resting on him.
“Best decision ever?” he asked.
She smiled, softer than before. “Best decision ever.”
love at first sight isn’t something you’ve given much thought in your eighteen years of life, but when you meet oscar, that changes completely. just too bad that your brother doesn’t approve at all.
bringing back a very old request that i started on a light-year ago… part two here
Lando kept his hand squeezed tightly in yours all the way through the paddock, not even letting go to stop and sign the merchandise fans were so eagerly holding up towards him. It confused the committed Formula 1 fans who weren’t used to seeing him in such a hurry, and especially not on media day. What was wrong with him?
The answer wasn’t what. The answer was found in the person being dragged behind him, almost running to keep up with his brisk pace. You.
It was your first race since last year’s Silverstone—where you’d been flanked by your entire family and therefore hadn’t been alone for a single second—so your older brother was terribly afraid that you would somehow get lost and scared and hurt, and he would be damned if that happened on his watch. Not when his parents so very generously had given him responsibility of you for the weekend. A responsibility he took very seriously.
It was no secret that you were Lando’s baby. The youngest of five, you were the whole family’s baby to be completely precise, but Lando had always been especially fond of you.
Maybe it came from the little boy who was shorter than two of his younger sisters and therefore claimed the third his favourite. Maybe it was the way you had always looked up him; staring at him through big, admiring eyes as though he could do nothing wrong, even when he felt like he screwed up everything. Or maybe it was just a classic case of caring older brother who remembered the small, innocent baby who had been placed in his seven-year-old arms and wanted you to stay that way forever.
Whatever it was, it was clear to everyone that you were Lando’s baby.
“You’ll stay right here, okay?” Lando was looking at you with his most serious expression, and you bit your cheek to stop yourself from reminding him that you had turned eighteen last month. Technically, you were an adult now, and he didn’t have the same power over you that he used to, but you were pretty sure that he wouldn’t like to hear that, so you held yourself back and instead gave him a nod in reply.
“I won’t move a single inch, Lan, I swear.” You assure him, holding back a giggle at his deep frown. “I’ve been here before, you know.”
“Yeah, but never alone.” He looked around worriedly, as if willing a familiar face to spring out and look after you. “There isn’t even someone from Oscar’s family to keep you company.”
“I think I’ll be fine either way.”
He didn’t seem convinced, far from actually, but when he was called upon by his PR-manager, he had no choice but to leave you to your own devices, but not without a lingering kiss to your hair and yet another warning look that you shrugged off with a teasing smile.
-
Oscar couldn’t recognise you. He was standing in the hospitality, waiting for his morning coffee to be made, when he spotted you from across the room. You were sitting alone on the best sofa with a glass of iced tea resting beside you like it was the most normal thing in the world, but he had no idea who you were.
The area around the screens was usually reserved for friends and family of the drivers, but he was alone this weekend and Lando hadn’t mentioned anyone coming either. Maybe you were confused and had planted yourself there by mistake. It didn’t hurt anyone, he thought to himself, deciding to let the matter rest, but when you turned around and he caught sight of your face, it seemed that any excuse to start up a conversation with you would be good.
He wasn’t a very poetic person, had barely passed English literature in high school, but the way you looked could simply not be described as anything but divine.
His breath hitched in his throat and when his coffee was placed on the counter, he picked it up with more eagerness than ever before and set off towards the couch.
“Hi,” He was smiling politely, trying desperately not to seem too diligent. “Are you lost?”
You looked up from your phone, surprised. “No, I don’t think so. Am I not allowed to sit here?”
“Well, this area is actually reserved for family of the drivers…” He shrugged apologetically.
“Oh, well I am family! Have we never met? I’m Lando’s sister.” You hesitated for a moment, scanning his face. It was the first time you saw him up close, but he looked exactly as he did on all the pictures you had found yourself staring at a bit too long.
He was taken aback for a moment, a frown forming between his eyebrows. “Really? I’ve never seen you around before. I’m Oscar.”
He held out his hand, and you took it, shaking it carefully. His skin was warm and rough, contrasting to your smooth palms.
“I know.” You answered. “That you’re Oscar, I mean. I think everyone here knows that.”
He held back a smile, a small blush forming on his cheeks. “Oh. Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
You both smiled for a moment, keeping eye contact. “Well, sorry for assuming that you didn’t know what you were doing.” He looked around for a moment. “Can I join you?”
You smiled. “Yeah, of course.” You scooted to the side, allowing him to sit.
-
That night, after had Lando dropped you off at the hotel room directly across from his (because apparently a few meters was paramount to your safety), you were lying awake, tossing and turning.
Your conversation with Oscar kept playing in your mind; the way he looked at you, eyes full of wonder, the way his hand accidently brushed yours, causing warmth to flutter through your body, and most importantly, the way he paid so close attention to what you were saying, as if you weren’t a young teenager, but instead an intelligent equal, with interesting knowledge and opinions. It had left you flustered, staring after him when he eventually had to leave for his obligations.
He was cute.
-
The rest of the race weekend went by routinely, Lando breathing down your neck as always, following you around like an overly eager guard dog, but this time, you kept sneaking glances to the other side of the garage, hoping to catch a look at Oscar. Just a small glimpse of his blond hair would have made you happy, but it was near impossible when Lando insisted you stay in the far corner, out of “harm’s way”.
Therefore, it was no surprise when you boarded the plane towards London on Monday with no other interactions with Oscar than your first conversation, and even though you couldn’t explain why, it made your heart ache in a weird way. Apparently, he felt the same.
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yourusername home again 👩🏫
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frienduser back where you belong ☺️ ❤️ liked by author
randomuser we loved seeing you at the gp!!
yourusername lando told you i’m their favourite
lando hey!
frienduser2 watch us being all studious
yourusername we’re sooo smart
oscarpiastri 😍 ❤️ liked by author
randomuser pretty pretty girl
oscarpiastri & yourusername via instagram stories
Oscar ended up staying almost a week, sleeping in your apartment with you, waiting on your couch when you came home from university, and making dinner together each evening in your small kitchen. You had become almost domestic by the time he had to leave again, and you felt as though you had known the crooked smiled boy for years, not a mere few weeks, when it finally came to saying goodbye at the airport. Oscar was hesitant to leave as well, stopping several times to look back, even after you’d hugged and kissed for more time than considered normal.
When he finally was out of sight, you stood still for a moment too, felling heavier than you had in a while, now that you had to go home to an empty apartment for the first time in what felt like forever.
You were just about to turn around when your phone buzzed in your hand. Oscar was calling.
You picked up on the second ring, immediately pressing the phone to your ear as a smile broke onto your face again.
“Hi,” Your voice was a bit breathless even though you were standing completely still.
“Hi,” he retorted, a smile evident in his voice. “I just wanted to hear your voice again. Make sure you weren’t just a dream I made up.”
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yourusername life lately 👩❤️💋👨
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frienduser me bc you have a man now: 😔
yourusername dw i’ll never forget you 😘
flonorris since when do you have someone to hold hands with
yourusername you sound like it’s unbelievable 😒
flonorris it is 😬
randomuser THE london girl
randomuser little norris has a boyfriend 🥺
frienduser2 cuties ☺️
randomuser the way he holds your hand i’m dying
carlossainz55 oh 😏
yourusername carlos…
frienduser3 oh you need to update me rn ❤️ liked by author
randomuser lando how are we feeling
“You don’t know what you’re doing!” Lando was distressed, pacing the floor of your apartment as his voice gradually got louder. He was high on adrenaline, shaking from the inside and out, but his voice was firm.
“I do know what I’m doing. I’m in a mature, committed relationship with a guy that I like.” You were sitting on the couch, staying infuriatingly calm and standing your ground despite the way he was riling you up.
“You don’t know what a mature relationship is.” He laughed bitterly, shaking his head. “You’ve had what? One boyfriend? One fucking high school boyfriend?” The way he stood, tall and deafening, while you slowly shrank in on yourself on the couch made you feel like a little kid again. “Don’t act like you know anything about a mature relationship. You don’t. And Oscar is taking advantage of that.”
His words pierced like a blade in your stomach, twisting around a knife he had planted when he first started shouted.
“Don’t be mean.” Your voice broke on the last syllable. “You don’t know anything, Lando.”
He flinched at the way you said his name. No teasing, no affection, no Lan. He softened his voice then, still demeaning, still piercing through you, but quieter now, more like the careful softness he usually held around you.
“I do know, though.” He raked a hand through his hair. “I have seven years more experience than you in every field there is. And you who also has that? Oscar.”
“He’s not using me, Lan. He’s not.” You were crying now, couldn’t stop it when he was looking at you like that, like you were letting him down. He was making you question everything about the boy who had slept so many nights in your bed, caressing your hair, kissing your bare skin, and telling you how beautiful you were. Had it really been too good to be true? Had it been lies upon lies?
Lando’s resolve softened even further when he caught sight of your tears, a cooing sound immediately escaping him. He tried to reach out, to comfort you the same way he had done so many times before, but you flinched away, willing yourself to disappear completely into the couch and he swore he felt his heart break in his chest.
“Just think about it, okay? Don’t jump into it too fast.” His hand was hovering over your back, fingers clenching in desperation. He just wanted to stop the tears still streaming freely from your eyes. “I just want what’s best for you. You know that.”
And you knew that. That was the worst part. That was the problem.
