The one time I’ve ever tried to draw Nyarly and Kez, and this is what I did.
I think it was for one of those outfit memes, but like, I can’t say The Crawling Chaos wouldn’t wear a crop top.
To say the trial had been a spectacle was an understatement. The tirades Keziah had gone on, the things she'd confessed too (some true, some made up because it didn't matter now so why not go out on a high note, ) the dire curses she'd shrieked. The promises she'd made to haunt them all from beyond the grave.
The crowning moment had been the string of low syllables which had made the judge’s ears bleed.
She'd been hastily gagged after that, (though she managed to bite a man in the process), shackled and dragged out still kicking. For a woman in her mid seventies she possessed truly unnatural vigor.
And now, in her cell, shackled to a wall and unable to reach the chalk sequestered in her sock, she didn't have much to do but struggle against her bonds and wait.
For what though, death? For escape? Not salvation, not what they'd call salvation, she was beyond that. Beyond wanting that.
So she certainly didn't see why they'd send a priest.
For just a moment, when he first heard his approach she'd mistaken his foot steps for the cloven feet of The Black Man himself.
The disappointment on her face when she realized her mistake was profound.
"Well witch this is your final chance, will you repent and renounce the devil."
"The devil can stick his pitchfork up his ass that's not who I work for." She shifted her gaze to glare daggers at the man, ready to give one more diatribe about how everything he thought was true was in fact, a load of horse shit.
But the words caught in her throat as she saw a familiar glint in those phenomenally dark eyes, and she had to stifle a laugh. No mistake then, she wondered if he had hooves hidden under there after all.
"I might renounce someone else though. Turns out this Nyarlathotep guy," she'd known his true name for a while now. "He's a bit overrated."
The Crawling Chaos, who in fairness had not been disguising himself particularly well, blinked in surprise. And then let out a startled laugh of his own.
"Is he now?” He questioned, wondering where she was going with this exactly.
"Tell me then, about this... Nai-are-lath-o-tep? Was it?" He struggled with the syllables in a parody of Keziah when she had been much younger. And, as they were alone opted to make himself comfortable, pulling a stool from the aether and seating himself in front of her to let the woman air her complaints.
This may not be the wisest of tactics. But in many respects Keziah had never been wise. Clever, smart, sharp as a tack sure. But stubborn as a mule and incapable of shutting up when it was in her best interest.
"Well, the thing is, I'm feeling a little let down.”
He nodded sympathetically.
“I was supposed to get a fantastic vacation, see some untold alien vistas, sweeping worlds beyond my wildest dreams, that sort of thing." She continued as if the man shaped thing before her hadn't been the one to make these promises.
"And instead I'm in jail. I've spent the better part of a week being interrogated and tortured and being paraded out in front of the whole town. Also, earlier today, someone threw a tomato at me.” It was such a minor point to end on but it had riled her intensely.
“So unless The Crawling Chaos were to say, be here, right now with a lock pick or something. I'd be pretty annoyed with this whole arrangement." There was some irritation here, to be sure, but for the most part she was trying very hard to keep a straight face.
"Oh, shame he's not here then..." He could barely finish before another chuckle escaped.
"I'm that obvious?"
"I'm that observant. And you aren't really trying, are you?"
"No I'm not."
"But you are here to spring me right?" Keziah asked for very little, some truth, some knowledge, something more then...this.
The Crawling Chaos made a grand show of checking the pockets of his vestments. (Had they been there a moment ago? Did it matter?)
"Sorry, no lock pick."
Keziah's face contorted to a sneer, she was about to open her mouth to let out a complaint, and insult, or a curse, but he pressed a finger to her lips to silence her.
"Consider this a final test. One more little thing to do before I sweep you off to those promised alien vistas." The ever present capricious glint in his eyes was paired with a playful smirk.
She would have dearly loved to interrupt, but knew better, and instead settled for looking unimpressed.
"After all, it's only walls. You know how to get around those."
She did.
"I do. But I’d need a free hand. I know you can conjure an arm or twenty on a whim. But I'm stuck with these two," For emphasis she yanked on the chain which connected her to the wall. "And they're occupied."
A quiet bemused scoff from Nyarlathotep.
He was enjoying this. It was a good thing she didn’t have a hand free, the temptation to slug a dark god in the face may have proven overwhelming.
"Why are you here then?"
"Oh, just checking in, it's been hours, I was expecting you sooner."
"Again. Shackles."
"I'm sure you'll figure something out. Shall I go tell everyone you won't renounce the devil."
"You can tell them what I said about the pitchfork. And the same goes for their god. Actually while you're at it. Feel free to come up with a few more creatively heinous crimes for me to have committed. I'd like to leave an impact."
Another quiet chuckle. "I'm not sure I can top your little speech earlier. But I'll do my best."
"You were watching that?" A brief flicker of embarrassment. Comportment wasn't her strong suit, but she'd never been quite so feral in front of him before.
"Oh yes. You were very impressive. But I should let you get back to your prison break. See you on the other side."
He turned to leave giving Keziah a malefic grin as he did, his stool dispersing back into the air as The Crawling Chaos strolled out.In the silence left in Nyarlathotep's wake Keziah set back to work.
She wasn't sure how much time had passed, but she was strongly considering breaking her own thumb to slip at least one of her bonds when the chittering from the corner caught her attention, and the shadow of something slinking, beyond where most could see.
"About time you showed up." She didn’t even look at him.
Mocking titter in response.
"Oh shut up."
Indignant squeaking.
"Fine. Sorry. Now. Please, get your awful little hands over here and help me out."
Brown Jenkin shot out of the corner and clamored up Keziah's skirt, taking careful steps to dig his claws into her more than needed. She winced at each movement. Still. It was help. She'd take it.
Sometime later, in a place where time didn't matter, that seemed for all the world like an unremarkable little attic room with book lined walls and an altar table in the center The Crawling Chaos waited for the tell-tale violet light to spill from the corners and the witch to make her appearance. He was getting impatient. Maybe worried. But he wouldn't admit that aloud.
She finally did, bedraggled, her hands covered in chalk dust and blood, her face sporting a grin equal parts triumphant and manic.He couldn't help but return the smile. His own to wide for the face he currently wore.
"Ah, Keziah, it took you long enough." He gave her a quick once over. "Clean yourself up, you have a book to sign."
Caring!Lover Nyarlathotep x Blushy School Girl!Keziah Mason.
Someone submitted this nightmare to Kez’s inbox. I laughed so hard I cried, and now you all have to read it too.
"I love you Keziah Mason, you sexy feral grandma." Nyar-Nyar the stud whispered tenderly in Keziah's wrinkled old ear under the light of the full moon. "I want to make an Ugga-Naach with you." Keziah blushed and made an anime schoolgirl noise. "R-really?" She squealed. Nyar-Nyar just nodded like the stud he is. Keziah gave a dreamy sigh and then fainted promptly into Nyar-Nyar's strong manly arms.
Keziah recovered from her swoon, probably having broke her hip but it was okay because she saw the beautiful face of her lover above her. Nyar-Nyar smirked like a sexy anime bishounen. "Now where were we?" He whispered sexily, before tenderly kissing his sexy feral grandma lover under the light of the full moon. Keziah blushed like an anime girl but she didn't faint this time. "Now let's go make an Ugga-Naach together, baby." Nyar-Nyar whispered so sexily that Keziah was nearly incinerated.
Nyar-Nyar the stud carried his sexy feral grandma lover to his bedroom that existed in some pocket dimension somewhere. There was a heart-shaped bed and "No-Eyed Girl" or whatever it's called was playing and everything. They made out for 4.2 hours and then made sweet tender love for 4.2 more hours. Then they got married in the Dreamlands and Keziah became Nyar-Nyar's blushing bride and bore his glorious progeny. Yhoundeth was jealous but she couldn't do shit about it.
Yhoundeth and Shub both had a girl's night and got drunk and bonded over their husbands cheating on them with crazy old human women. Also they probably hooked up or something. Meanwhile Keziah and Nyar-Nyar the stud ruled the Dreamlands together, Keziah was the queen and Nyar-Nyar was the king and they made all of humankind their humble servants. Randolph Carter cried of jealousy because he was SURE he was going to get Nyar-Nyar in the end since he's so pretty and all.
"Ha! In your FACE Randy! I KNEW Nyarly-poo would come to his senses in the end and date me instead since I'm the only one who REALLY understands him!" Keziah flipped off her rival while Randolph cried like a shoujo heroine's defeated rival. Also Nodens was defeated and Nyar-Nyar the stud laughed sadistically and gave him a long anime villain monologue while Keziah looked on with sparkly eyes because her husband was SOOO sexy!!! Emperor's New Clothes played in the background.
"I love you sooo much, Nyarly-poo!" Keziah gushed, throwing herself Nyar-Nyar the stud's sexy arms as he stepped on Nodens. Keziah and Nyar-Nyar made out passionately while Nodens and Randolph watched. Brown Jenkin gave Keziah a high-five as she kissed Nyar-Nyar, because he knew how long she'd lusted and pined after Nyar-Nyar's sexy abs and he was glad to see his witch mom finally get it.
