Seeing a post talk about our old RP's and cringing when we read back made me nostalgic to read some of mine. Sooooo here is one from one of my WoW articles as Shamere Carruth aka The Priestess With the Mostess aka The Bonkinator! Makes me feel old though :-p
The Truth With Carruth!
First Edition
Welcome to the first edition of The Truth With Carruth from whom other than Shamere Carruth! Here is where we’ll, if you pardon the expression, get down and dirty with events and people from the outside world. If you find yourself sheltered in that cabin in Redridge or stuck in snowy hills outside of Ironforge have no fear! The priestess with the mostess is going to bring you the news straight from the horse’s mouth!
And sorry, I will not get it straight from the nightsabers mouth. I’m not venturing near those cats. I enjoy having my head attached to my body thank you very much!
For today’s edition we’re going to sit down with the warrior maiden, Sanaa Strathers, who is also called the Daughter of Duskwood. It’s time for us to find the truth about this warrior and what makes her go out there day after day to bonk the baddies. So let’s find out!
Shamere: First, let me say how thankful I am that you came to sit down with me today. You’re not an easy woman to get a hold of!
Sanaa: Some guys would beg to differ on that but that’s a totally different point little priestess and would probably bring a flush to your innocent self. In either case, it’s a pleasure to have a chance to sit down and answer any questions you may have. The good folk out there deserve to know what happens out there in places like Northrend.
Shamere: Well this is Carruth’s Truths so let it spill! What is it like fighting such an enemy? I mean deadies, baddies, uglies, and nasties galore! Why do you put yourself in such harms way?
Sanaa: <laughs softly> There are definitely those out there and every day is a risk. But for me it’s personal. I hail from Duskwood who has long been neglected while it sits in a mist of darkness and deals with those baddies you speak of. Stormwind still neglects her and all that we can do to survive is band together and fight. So that is what I do hoping to prevent the same darkness from invading the lives of others. You never know whose life you may have saved by slaying that ghoul or that ogre.
Shamere: Wow…I never thought of it like that. I heard Duskwood use to be such a lovely place similar to what you may find in Elwynn Forest.
Sanaa: That is true.
Shamere: It has been quite some time since I have been there. Do you all still fight for it?
Sanaa: With every muscle in our bodies. We will not yield and nor give in to that darkness. Althea Ebonlocke still leads the Nightwatch and while we have breath, we will have our blades. I may be very fun, as some would put it, when I am trying to relax and unwind from my ventures but I will always fight with honor and every bit of strength in me because I will always have something to fight for.
Shamere: Is that how you gained such a name as ‘Daughter of Duskwood’?
Sanaa: <nods with a smile> And I wear that with honor upon my heart, hun. I always shall.
Shamere: So what does the Daughter of Duskwood like to do when she’s not fighting the good fight?
Sanaa: <slowly a smirk spreads> I’m not sure that is something to write about, hun. Well, not the finer details. Needless to say I like my drink and men the same…strong and….well nevermind that. I recently found myself in a tavern in Ironforge called the Iron Fist listening to a poetry night. It was hosted by someone I believe to be a pirate from how she spoke and carried herself. A Carow, if I recall correctly. It was quite entertaining. I may have to venture there more often.
Shamere: I’m puzzled on how you like your men…<tilts her head curiously>
Sanaa: <bursts out laughing and waves her hand dismissively> I am not having the Cathedral coming down on me for destroying your innocence priestess! No way no how! Granted you are quite a lovely little thing so that innocence won’t last too long I’m sure. I may have to…<smirks>
Shamere: <blinks and flushes deeply> Stop that! I’m not that innocent to not know where you’re going missy. Don’t get bonked! <giggles> Anything else you would like to add as we conclude?
Sanaa: <mood sombers> Yes. Whether we want it or not war is upon us all. Keep your blades sharpened, your spells on the tip of your tongue. It’s difficult accepting change like that of the death knights and their assistance but in this war we need all the damn help we can get. Support those bleeding for you. Killing is never easy and weighs upon the soul with every swing of a blade. Don’t take it for granted and don’t forget those who have died to protect you, your families and your loved ones.
Shamere: Well said! Thank you for joining us on the first edition of The Truth With Carruth,
Sanaa. You keep fighitng and I’ll be there supporting you every step of the way! I look forward to talking to you again.
Sanaa: I’ll make certain of it next time, hun <winks before rising to depart>
I hope you appreciated and enjoyed my little sit down with Sanaa Strathers. She’s something else to say the least! Now I have to share from my own journal some of my own ventures and my thoughts as I travelled the lands trying to aid and heal our fighters during these difficult times.
Oh the wonders I have seen! I have seen some terrors too. For instance, I got a glimpse of the Lich King when aiding Jaina Proudmoore along with a handful of adventurers! Now talking about someone who needs a good bonking! I of course was too short to even reach his head and give him that bonking so I headed toward the nearest exit. I even remember what I said as I bolted out of there.
'I'll get you Lichy! You may be too tall for me to bonk you this time but next time I'll bring my step ladder...or gnome to stand upon...and bonk you real good!'
My fellow adventurers got a good laugh out of that one. Even the gnome enjoyed but I think too much! He said he rather have me stand on his shoulders so he could....Oh Light I can't even write that! I told him that he needs his mouth washed out with soap but he just enjoyed that more! <Shamere blushes furiously remembering>
I have seen some really scary things but it only strengthens my resolve to do what I can to aid my fellow adventurers and the people of the lands. I got involved in some battles in Wintergrasp but only used my talents to heal our combatants. It went well....
...for the Horde! They walloped, bonked and sizzled us in every way! Talk about rough. I think that what happened was someone in the Alliance offered them cake but there really was no cake! And once the Horde discovered 'The cake is a lie!' they put a good ol' fashioned bonking on us! Ouch!
Shamere Quick Hits!
10. You think you have it bad? I ran across a human in Goldshire the day. Here’s her dilemna: “I was bitten by a vampire. But that’s not the worst of it! I think I’m pregnant and seeing that I am half dragon and part werewolf with a quarter of cat people in me I don’t know how the baby will come out!”
----Eeek! I think she can add delusional to that listing since I don’t know what half of those things are!
9. How many guilds are there with the name of “Order of “ in their name out there? Is there some sort of union or organization we don’t know about? Can I join if so? I could use a good retirement package!
8. A quote from a tauren I ran across in the Moonglade when visiting. “Gnome punting is not a sport…it’s a hobby” Ouch for my gnome friends! I hope you bonk them in the knees! Leave my gnomies alone!
7. Ever see a dwarf male in a dress? A pink one at that! I think someone lost a bet or got really really reeeaaallllyyyy drunk!
6. All hail King Wrynn! But seriously…how many times a day do you shout the same thing about the Ebon Hold sending us one of their death knights? Do you have it on a gnome 800XFS recorder or some other little gadget our friends make? What happens when you lose your voice? Light! Why haven’t you lost your voice!
----Side note. If you all want to make gold. Invest in fruits and veggies. Stormwind citizens buy them by the cart full because they are forever throwing them at the deathknights that join us. Shame on you all!
5. Still can’t find the definitions for these new words I hear so often. Lewt? Noob? Roxxors my soxxors? LOL? What in the Light are you saying! I have an easier time understanding gutterspeak from the undead and sometimes they have no jaws!
4. Why when an adventurer retires everyone asks for their stuff. It’s used, broken, sweaty. Do you even know what they did in that stuff? Ewww….just ewwww.
3. Word of warning. DO NOT! I repeat…DO NOT ask a Draenei for a horseback ride just because they have hooves! They don’t take too kindly to that. <rubs her backside remembering the slap there>
2. Hey! Maybe the Horde is fighting us tenaciously because we have so many chairs. If they want some they always have to venture to Silvermoon. Maybe if we loan them some chairs they’ll get lazy sitting on their backsides and forget about the battle in Wintergrasp! Otherwise they sit on the hard floor or on wood and get splinters so of course by then they are cranky and ferocious in battle! I would be too! RAWR!
1. Secret ingredients to peace:
Give Horde more chairs and cake. This may vary as some prefer pie for some unearthly reason!
Give kobolds candles. Don’t you hear them screaming for their candles in Elwynn? Give them back!
Give murlocs….a cheeseburger? I am not certain on this one. I am still working with the D.E.H.T.A. on deciphering the murloc language but I could have sworn when one said “RRRRRGGGGGLLLLLLLLL” he was saying he wanted a cheeseburger.
Erm…nevermind the last note. I think my murloc just needs work!
Well thank you for reading this long edition of the very first The Truth With Carruth! I hope you enjoyed it because I enjoyed writing it! I love you all and may the Light bless the lives of everyone during these difficult times.
Lights blessings!