(tadc ep7 spoilers) honestly i mean. they already knew by that point but, all that build up, all of the hope...
i think, This was the moment they've realized, there is truly no way out of there.
the circus song playing in the background, almost like a whisper at the back of their minds... they were clowned, toyed; any last shred of hope of ever getting out, absolutely crushed.
this was so cruel. they were Just starting to accept their new lives, trapped in a cartoon circus, but now this adventure put them on edge, establishing something they already learned long ago, setting them back to when they first arrived.
caine is cruel but he's not malicious. he's cruel because he's oblivious, he's oblivious because he's not human. he's an ai, can only grasp so far what his ai can allow. he's cruel because he does not know, he does not understand, and cannot Ever comprehend the impact his actions could have on such an emotional, so different from what he is, specie.
he's fascinated, enchanted, but cannot empathize. not in the way they need. not in a way he can.
notes ive wrote for myself yesterday, food for thought; also summary of what this post is gonna be :::
ava11, was that green particles explosion supposed to happen or it was because of the force of the rocket's landing. victim's arrival at the outernet connecting to ALANSPC (despite not being an intentional send-off like the others). chosen being born just a few months after victim's departure. second being chosen one's return. dark only being in the computer for very few minutes. second sensing victim's name being changed but not chosen's. second being an animation. mitsi and all the others being animations too.
well. *clasps hands* i need to brainstorm about ava11 for a bit because i am actually going insane. to end the year with words upon words of my incoherent attempt at comprehending the vast universe that it is of these stickfigures <3
at first, initially, long before avm even, stickfigures (drawings) could only come to life through a symbol <- that's what we knew, back then. that's what we knew for a long, long time.
but then ava11 came, and it completely revamped our entire worldview of their origins because there is, actually, another way, a way that doesn't even include the Symbol, a way that existed alongside it.
and its even more interesting because, unlike Symbol, where you just right-click and name your drawing (a specific name, for a specific purpose), here, you just need to submit (your flash)
well, animate and then you submit, as we were only ever shown animations being submitted to newgrounds. and i wanna put a big emphasis on this, specifically the animations part
so, here's the difference; victim, the chosen one, and the dark lord, are all Symbols, motionless drawings, meant to have a purpose,
whilst, mitsi, shepard, corn dog guy, and many others, are all Flash, animations, meant to tell a story,
and, get this; as all of the flash characters are animations, as all alan's symbols are drawings...
as all of them came to life, in one way or another, through an animation, or a symbol;
but that can't be right. mitsi +others, as animations, only came to life because her flash was submitted to newgrounds. victim +others, as drawings, only came to life because they were right-clicked into being a symbol.
second, orange, chosen's return, wasn't supposed to come to life; not when they weren't submitted, despite being an animation. not when they weren't right-clicked into a symbol, despite being alan's drawing.
which brings me back, once again..
despite never being an animation, despite never being submitted, the moment victim stepped onto the outernet, the moment their rocket landed upon newgrounds with the green particles surrounding them, the universe took it and connected it to ALANSPC, despite victim descending from a completely different computer, despite mitsi's particles guiding them from a different place.
that's kinda sad to think about considering the context, victim will always be connected to alan, regardless of how much they may wish not to be.
and here is where i ask questions, as food for thought;
did victim, through their abrupt and violent and unintended arrival into the outernet, had any sort of relation to second's sudden life's existence?
second sensing victim's name changing, but not chosen's, (despite being the chosen one's return, despite being their predecessor) (is it because the name was H4CK3R?)
did chosen coming to life just a few months after, and being the only one (prior second) that stayed for far longer, holds important information in how second not only came to life, but also was born being her successor?
second glitching into chosen for various seconds (despite not being her reeincarnation, chosen was still alive) (alan says they hold a brotherly dynamic, they are connected somehow)
did dark only staying for a few minutes, yet the only one to have a programming not tied to her name, had any impact on the second coming at all?
dark being the trigger, not the first, but certainly the only one (as of now) to have triggered second's powers (and all to protect, for vengeance, to destroy [the one who killed who's important to them])
that scene in particular, just makes me think that, by connecting to ALANSPC, it held quite a strong influence on second coming to life, like it just had to happen or else second wouldn't exist, you know?
also, may just be a thematic/aesthetic choice fittingly to mitsi's character, but it is interesting to me how mitsi's theme sounds so much like second's theme. and how sec is the only out of the hollowheads to have a theme aswell (and how the setting is so similar to when second was being drawn, cute nice music playing as we are shown artists animating their respective stickfigures) <- just, food for thought.
NOW HERE IS THE PART I WANTED TO GET INTO;
second's powers being the exact same of what brings these animations, these stories to life (literally) <- THIS. is SUCH an intentional writing/artistic choice
and it's not just the shape of their powers, but also what they are. what they can do. second is literally able to bring life, to give and to return it, and it is such an important thing to notice that they can't remember it, nor do they even dwell on it, for a long time. (second, you are, in fact, the only one who can bring life to animations. victim can draw on the air (which is also something i would like to touch upon in another potential post), you can make them move.) (you also literally obliterated the dark lord how can you not remember that─)
and then we have animation vs physics, which is a whole other thing that i've yet gotta comprehend, let alone form words for what i can understand, but more or less; it tells us a story, of a world, of an universe.
a force beyond what any of us can comprehend, what even second can comprehend; something their mind couldn't handle, something that brought what shouldn't be but it is now,
did you know that the apple, in mythology, is a symbol for knowledge, immortality, temptation, the fall of man and sin?
the second coming may be more than we realize, more than even they realize. (a vessel for an universe, a world, a life)
my whim for this post fell down so i sadly dont have anymore to say, but gosh i have so many questions. ava13 may be a rollercoaster for sure
okay this took some time but i think my brain can finally form proper words again ... yay ..
okay so. influencer arc. episode 3. we are surely in for a ride !! <- me and @thecatghost111 had a convo about it ,,, not only about this episode , but also about the whole arc in general - and like ... i really wanted to write a post about it but couldn't find the right words to properly explain it .....
now I do . and like ! THERE IS SO MUCH TO UNPACK HERE──
ghosty also made a post !! check it out bro ( genderneutral ) !1! plus the whole convo was also inspired from this post right here .... :>
spoilers ( and long post ) ahead !! of course ( listening to this soundtrack as i type this ... lol )
( just so you know ; this is mostly just .. rambling. yeah. rambling. yapping. eheh. this is how my brain works most of the time lol ; plus straight up some copypastas from my posts on the community .. eheh ... )
sep. 21 rambling
quick thought but i find so ironic how green is like. the most loyal of the group ; he's the one to first find the differences in his friends' behavior, one to take the hit in order for they not, one to chase even after the one who left them to die, and one to protect his friends to the very most
... isn't that ironic
oct. 5th rambling
Green is not okay. I think he hasn't been for a really long time,
ngl that whole arc hits really close to home ; i've been a people pleaser for a really long time ( ever since i was younger ) - craving for validation , to feel accepted by other people because i've always just felt brushed off ; feeling good enough for myself didn't feel good enough by itself , so i was yearning for other people's validation / to feel good enough for someone ( various someones - because even just for one single someone , it didn't feel enough for me ) because feeling good enough for myself wasn't what i felt like i needed
being a people-pleaser usually means you don't feel enough for yourself ; nothing you do makes you feel like it's good enough , so you often finds yourself searching for other people's opinions on your client , devouring every single view people have upon yourself like a delicious ( but uneasy ) meal.
it's so yummy , you just can't help but consume more of its' meal , swallowing it all until there is nothing left and then you have to make another meal ( = do even more things just to please people )
The way Green, at the start of this arc, was so quick to feel so incredibly drawn by one single comment that complimented one of his videos - he was so quick to become influenced ( lol ) by one. single. compliment.
this whole thing makes me think Green hasn't felt enough for himself , or for anyone at all , for a really long time
<- being a people-pleaser , it is not a selfless act nor is it a healthy coping mechanism -> as much as you try to please others , you're only doing it to feel enough , and not out of actual genuine good desire = it's an unintentional selfish act , where all you do is to please others just to feel good about yourself.
The appetite of a people's pleaser is consuming more than what they should consume , and that can be really self-destructive
but no matter how full they actually are , they are always left starving for more .
What makes it worse , is that Green is becoming influenced by Youtube.
Youtube is a drug. Not in a literal way, but rather in a way that feels like a drug. The moment you become an influencer there, it's when all have a very high percentage of going absolutely downhill.
So many people like you. There are so many compliments. So many likes, so many views - How do you feel about it? Green felt uneasily great, for sure.
Being swarmed by compliments from left to right feels so incredibly great, but craving for more of it instead of just letting it be as it is can just feel so sickly sweet.
I love this arc and I love the way they are handling it all with so much precise and accuracy. Green needs this character development - Not only him, but the gang needs to see the harm they've caused aswell. ( Come on … Destroying his buildings? Joining the silverfishes who were ruining his concert? Bob? What did they expect????????? They deeply care for him , I know , and it all of those moments were never meant to be taken all that seriously - but the way Green was always treated like a punching bag just rubs me so off . )
oct. 19 rambling ( today , but worded better because this was based off the convo i had with ghosty . lol )
i love this scene so much ... not only because it's the first time we ever seen a creation&creator actually wholesome moment in this series , but also because it very much may symbolizes green embracing his flaws .
green has always been a perfeccionist. an arrogant , cocky , proud perfeccionist . paying attention to even the slightest , quite irrelevant , details . <- a perfeccionist is someone who raises their standards too high for themselves : a perfeccionist's view on their own creation has to be perfect , not only for themselves , but to everyone else around them .
high expectations , raised standards , not giving a single mistake a chance to even be seen . it has to be perfect , no matter how unrealistic and irrational that thought may be .
( maybe this is one of the reasons why green is so observant . he always notices something different with the others , because he's used to notice even the slightest details ; the tiny imperfections ; that may make him so desperate to fix . )
.. avm <- episode 35 is a nice example of that ; truth be told , green was completely justified in this episode . i , personally , never had a concert to prepare , but i do know for sure that these kind of things take time and a lot of effort . too much to prepare , so much anxiety-inducing to deal with , lots of scrapped and risked previous plans and notes for the concert , so much mistakes being made along the way , so much training for everything to be perfect ...
only for it all to go to waste.
and for a perfeccionist such as green? bro, how fucking devasted he must have felt after that .
so many months of careful preparation ... all thrown away ...
the audience clapped and whistled audibly , but none of them was for him .
one difference between the gang and green when it comes to acchievements , is that the gang mainly focuses on having fun ; they weren't trying to mess up the concert on purpose , nor did they wanted to brush away green's acchievements
they just wanted to have fun . red even invited green to join in on their little band they've made ( aka, which was mainly to distract the silverfishes , to keep them away from green ; bro was getting swarmed and they tried their best to keep the audience unaware of the real problem , while also giving green time to save the concert )
back on the build battle episodes ... them immediately exploding green's buildings was kind of a jerk move , and honestly take what i'm saying with a grain of salt because this is mostly just speculation , but I do remember an user theorizing that ; the reason why the gang always exploded green's buildings , was because he always won and was always pretty cocky about it .
does it justify it ? absolutely not . they could have just talked it out instead , honestly .
.. talking about 'talk it out' ... for a tight-knit group according to green , they definitely do not have very good communication skills between each other , for sure .
I mean- lush caves happened because neither orange nor red talked about the kind of issues they had with each other . they suppressed everything , which eventually led to a very heated fight between them . which could have led to the end of their friendship .
( this analysis explains it a lot better !! )
ghosty pointed out how this lack of communication between them , could have been one of the reasons why green was so .. quick to get influenced ( lol ) by what an unknown public full of strangers had to say about him .
it usually takes some time , maybe some more compliments and likes , but ; for green , it took only one comment for him to get absolutely obsessed with more
mayhaps he didn't told any of them about the issues he's had . maybe if blue told them about the lava incident , green wouldn't have made the lava prank . maybe if orange and red talked about the issues about each other that bothered one another , lush caves wouldn't have happened . maybe if green talked about his validation-seeking issue , the arc could have gone a different path .
also , is it just me and ghosty who finds it strange how green didn't even made a single video of him playing noteblocks? making music? isn't that his literal passion ...? why wouldn't he make a video about that , lol .. ?
...perhaps because he doesn't think the audience would like it?
an user ( can't remember who awrgh ) also pointed out/speculated how it's possible that green didn't really. feel like his acchievements mattered anymore <- his friends are so used to him being good at everything that they are just . not impressed , anymore .
which is probably one of the reasons he was so quick to dive in into total strangers' opinions <- he wanted to feel worthy for someone , because he didn't feel worthy for his friends .
every single one of his noteblock sessions ; where he played music for the fun of it , they were always interrupted . sure they were all having fun anyway , but being interrupted doing something that you deeply cares about is not really fun .
( i guess episode 35 was just the last straw for that , perhaps . )
"i always thought he was good at everything not just to try and fill in that hole of trying to impress himself, but also so that his friends can be proud of himhe wants validation from his friends, too.
i also have ANOTHER angsty hc that green getting hurt in the actual shorts is actually so he can have his friends care about him. and that he’s capable of dodging them he just doesn’t want to (the prank)." <- ghosty
"the gang is not impressed anymore. they are just so indifferent to green's acchievements because thats what was always expected of him so not only would that cause some pressure, but would also make him feel like nothing that he has ever acchieved was enough" <- anon ( me :3 )
he listens to the audience , he listens to what they want , because all he wants is to feel enough , to feel worthy ; so , he sits back , and listens to what the audience has to say .
that's why this fight ; creation vs creator , greenscreen vs green , flaws vs perfections <- was so important .
greenscreen , at the end of the day , never wanted to fight .
they didn't want to harm anyone . they didn't mean to harm anyone . <- their glitches are uncontrollable , out of proportion ; it's not like they wanted to harm green .
.. initially , atleast .
greenscreen was born out of a scrapped , discarded , idea ; and they grew huge out of more scrapped , discarded ideas ; more mistakes that were immediately tossed to the trashbin without a second thought , just like them .
greenscreen is a beast ; a beast full of mistakes . full of flaws , full of imperfections , full of things green tried so desperately to hide ; something green immediately tossed to the ground , discarding it as nothing .
"greenscreen is a representation of trying to bottle, or contain the worst qualities of you. that comes back to haunt you later on, the more things you keep bottled up" <- ghosty
at the end of the day , greenscreen is just ... green. out of proportion green , glitched green , mistake green ... but still green. and green doesn't aknowledge them as such until the end , where he has to choose between letting his imperfections ( his mistakes , his flaws , his every parts he tried to reject ) get seen by the public just so he could save his friends .. or continuing to reject them , like how he always did .
green doesn't aknowledge greenscreen as someone . on green's perspective , we can only see the evil greenscreen , who attacked them out of nowhere , and is currently trapping his friends on the bottom corner of the computer <- all we see is an evil villain , heartless monster ; an imperfect , flawed beast .
a mistake is all green sees . a beast is all greenscreen is .
.. it was not until he had to choose between saving his friends , or let his fear of what others may think win , that he finally aknowledged them . that he finally realized what greenscreen truly is . what greenscreen actually wanted from the very start .
greenscreen was just .. distraught. confused. hurt.
they just wanted to be published , too . they wanted to be seen - not necessarily to be loved , but to be accepted . to be aknowledged , to be noticed ; not as a mistake , but as an another part of green that wants to be noticed , like how every part of green wants to , too .
the persona green adapted to himself on his channel symbolizes the person he wants people to view as him . the person green is on the first 2 videos of the channel is the half of him that is actually genuine . greenscreen's whole character symbolizes the person green doesn't want anyone , not even his friends , to see . greenscreen's character symbolizes the mistakes and flaws green is not proud of , and actively choose to reject it .
influencer green is what it is shown to us . greenzilla is what he is towards his friends . greenscreen is what he bottles up to the very deep .
anon : greenscreen is just another part of him that wants love, like all of the parts of him
green didn't want to give love to that one part of him that he hates
but he saw how much it has teared him and his friends apart - how much it has teared himSELF apart
it was hard , it was … awrgh.
but he eventually accepts it. embraces it
loves it ...
ghosty : greenscreen. i think is more than just a cool copy of green.
it's a physical manifestation of green and his mistakes. at first. it was more manageable with the help of his friends.
so it was easy to ignore it.
it was easy to just bottle it all up. and pretend it was okay
it's so easy to think greenscreen was evil, when it was ep 1 from green's perspective
aka, how a mistake can seem horrible with no redeeming qualities
anon : because thats how green saw it. he saw greenscreen ( a mistake he made ) as evil
something unworthy
something unloveable ...
ghosty : now. he's looking back at all the things he's kept hidden. knows he can't try and overpower it again.
all he can do is try and love it.
at the end of the day, greenscreen was just distraught for being discarded like nothing. like they were worthy nothing.
at the end of the day, greenscreen is just like green. someone who wants to be seen, to be noticed, to be aknowledged, to be loved.
and green does so, after so long of choosing to reject it.
he embraces his mistakes. he accepts his flaws. he loves his imperfections.
and that's all every single part of him always wanted, always needed.
and they watched it . his friends watched everything .
and they embrace it together .
they embrace all of green's parts , all of them . they embraced them and they loved them regardless .
every single part of you , no matter how small it is , no matter how messy it is , no matter how imperfect it is , it is still a part of you that still wants to be noticed and loved by you .
too lazy to search for any mistakes so uhh ... yea lol ( in my defense , i took 6 hours to finish this . even more so because the electricity just went off at some point because of the rain lol .. )
from the way jax reacted when anything related to 'meaningful connections outside of the circus' are mentioned ― the way he instantly looks away with a sad gaze ― would that means he didn't have anyone waiting for him? no one actually meaningful... no wonder he was so reluctant. to a chance of an 'exit'.
makes you wonder; ribbit and kaufmo are, so far confirmed, the only meaningful connections he's ever had ― but at some point (possibly after ribbit's abstraction), he refuses to relate and connect to any of the others, seemingly preferring to be Emotionally alone
and, yet; he pressed the red button, confirming he would rather stay trapped than be in the real world, all alone. regardless (or maybe intended? do you think he would have pressed the blue button if he was the only one in the circus?) if that meant the others would stay trapped with him too.
the circus is a living hell but, as it implies, it is the only hell that has ever given jax some sense of heaven;;; he rejects potential bonds, isolating himself and dividing his relationships, but his real life is somehow a worse type of being alone, that he would rather this turbulent relationship he has with the others, than having no relationship at all.
