Zhongli and his (degenerate) ao3 tags, because we're all clowns here.
I'm very sleep-deprived and have been working on an angst fic for at least 2 months now, and it really occurred to me that there are several characterizations of Zhongli in ao3 wherein certain personality traits are added into his character (or headcanons) and I thought it would be fun to potentially stir in the melting pot in my brain for the "popular types" of Zhongli hc's/traits on ao3, and list them down so I can jokingly analyse the degeneracy of our content/j
Hopefully, no one gets offended over this little post, seeing as I made this in good fun with no actual intent of hurting peoples feelings (because who would be stupid enough to fight over pixels), but if you are offended, then I'm sorry I called you out on your deepest, darkest desires on this fictional man that probably occupies your head.
Warning: Contains content that jokes about mature themes (sex) so please skip this if that's not your bread and butter.
And please do not place ao3 tags as standards for real-life people and real relationships!!
1. Submissive Zhongli Tag/Bottom Zhongli Tag
- You believe that Zhongli is oblivious to both his feelings and others, because the last time he had a genuine connection, they died in his arms, or was buried under the earth.
- You took one look at his eyeliner, memorised every single detail of his ass movement when he walks in-game, went "Yes, breedable" and ran with it.
-You took that snippet of Female Zhongli in Rex Incognito, and took that opportunity to make the suddenly not so distant m!preg dreams of yours a reality.
- You say it isn't A/B/O unless the tags specify, and even then it's that trope where he goes from Alpha-Omega transitions. (I don't know the exact term can someone pls tell me, I don't read A/B/O)
-You believe that Guizhong pegged him during the archon war
- Big Ass
-You believe that the dragon just wants to be spooned, and is probably very, VERY clingy. You'd hug him, kiss him, cherish him if you could. (But you can't, so feed yourself with x readers or him being with a character you think would treat him to those).
- This also means you may or may not headcanon him as a touch starved dragon who just needs a hug and a massage from carrying the weight of this celestial bullshit for over 6000 years.
- You REALLY like Emperor Zhongli AU
- You REALLY REALLY like camboy/stripper Zhongli AU
- You LOVE College/Incubus AU
- Tiny waist
- Hair-pulling, tail pulling, whatever appendage pulling is probably down your alley, along with the ever lingering thought of one day hammering into Zhongli.
- *coughs in sadist* You want it rough, don't deny it, you want it rough for him.
- You are most likely a venzhong/rezhong/osirax/tartali/zhongguang/guili shipper; because you believe in (but not limited to): femdom, total ASS obliteration, and wholly believe in the inherent eroticism of a god falling apart and submitting to the hands of another in an act of trust. It's earth-shattering, and this display of humility from a god recently retired from their pedestal makes them just a bit more mortal, and just a bit more understood.
2. Dominant Zhongli/Top Zhongli
- You believe that millennia of being an archon has given him such a bad dry spell and so much pent up sexual frustration that he'd DOM anyone he's paired up with, he'd go slow to test the waters, but he'd absolutely wreck them by the fifth time they're in bed together.
- You took one look at Zhongli's burst animation and truly wished you were the one being crushed by that meteorite.
- You read Rex Incognito, took those details, applied the same logic to his exuvia form, and said "Yeah, he can rail me." Same m!preg logic applies, except this time he's the baby daddy.
- You wholly believe that his schlong would be pure something inches of hard rock and would be the most painful/pleasurable thing the character he's paired up with will experience.
- You probably believe he's a service top
- You probably believe he's possessive, would mark up the character he's being shipped with, place a geo sigil on them for good measure
- You enjoy the duality of "Gentleman on the streets, Monster in the sheets" because you are either extremely in need of a man who can do both, or are just that horny.
- You prefer Zhongli being rough, don't you dare lie to me and say that you DON'T prefer it rough. I HAVE SEEN ENOUGH OF THIS TAG NEXT TO THAT TAG.
- You believe he has a long tongue, perfect for reaching places...
- You believe that he'd be both an idiot and a smartass, a total blockhead, you love it!
- You REALLY like Mafia AU
- You REALLY REALLY like CEO AU
- YOU LOVE COFFEE SHOP/SOULMATE AU
- You REALLY REALLY REALLY like the time travels fics where the character you ship him with goes back in time and meets Morax and you believe that Morax would be either rougher/straightforward with the character and there's no in-between.
- You believe that Zhongli is a gentle soul who'd pour you tea as you read through a book, or listen to him ramble on about the grout used on the tiles of the floor and that he could provide you with the best clingy, lazy mornings EVER.
- stamina, you believe he has unlimited stamina
- You are most likely a zhongkae/zhongchi/zhongluc/zhongxiao/zhongguang/zhongqing/zhong x traveller shipper, who believe in (but are not limited to): Praise and Worship, the dragon's mate for life trope, and the inherent eroticism of a god devoting themselves to another in this boundless act of loyalty and pure love. Etched into the earth is a promise that will remain for millennia to come, even as the tides erase whatever reminders of the past it holds.
3. Archon Zhongli
- You are the lore geek
- You love fics that take place before canon events, where only tidbits of life before the canon are found in-game, because the reimagining of the world Morax lived in is one that you absolutely enjoy exploring.
- You love the adepti and yaksha, and you have certain head-canoned interactions for each member of the Liyue of Old.
- You believe that Osial and Zhongli were either lovers, or frenemies. No in-between unless it involves Guizhong, because that woman is a gray area.
- Speaking of Guizhong, you fully believe that Morax's real name Is actually Zhongli since it is stated that the Guili Assembly was named after Guizhong and Morax, and Zhongli literally fits the bill.
- You love thinking of a younger, much more blackened yet terrified Xiao, and how Zhongli tries to get him out of that shell by offering as much freedom as he could give, OR believe that Zhongli was very manipulative bastard.
- You either believe that Azhdaha had thoughts of his own after Zhongli gave him those eyes, or blindly agreed to Morax out of the gratefulness of being given the ability to see.
- Most of the fics you've read involve either Guizhong/Xiao/Venti/Ganyu/Havria/Osial/Azhdaha because they are integral parts of the life that Zhongli has lived through in the past, and seriously hope that there' more than just one-shots and unfinished fics.
- You want to see Zhongli's character progressions after you find out through Zhongli's story that he was more brawn than brain back in the days of the archon war.
- You also want to see unhinged, battle-crazed Zhongli.
- You think that the rich lore of genshin can be heavily expanded upon as long as given the chance. Unearthed history and beliefs that could change the game and its setting is a passion of yours.
4. Dad Zhongli/Parental Zhongli
- Kidfics, just, kidfics!
- You fully believe that Zhongli has parental, policing tendencies towards Ganyu and Xiao. He plays no favourites, no one goes unscathed, they are prepared to face the real world to the best of Parental Zhongli's abilities.
- You'd think he's the parent who gives those lectures at the dinner table when you make a joke he takes too literally.
- He also doesn't know dad jokes, which is the saving grace from the lectures. You believe he encourages free speech, but then no one has the heart to interrupt when he's in the middle of rambles and lectures.
- You LOVE babysitter AU, if you want to spice up Dadli's life, that is.
- You also enjoy seeing him a widower, what's up with that?
- You believe that his kids know better than drag their parent to the store, knowing full well he'll buy overpriced items thinking it's a good bargain, spend too much time examining a product or just ultimately veer away from the item in question to try and psychoanalyse what exactly the kid wants apart from what he actually wants.
- He's a good dad, though a bit of a mess. He's very willing to learn from his children, just as much as his children are willing to learn from him (albeit sometimes it's a bit overbearing.)
- He lets his children experiment with makeup, the red eyeliner was an idea that stuck.
- His children protect him from potential threats to their family dynamic.
- You wholly believe in the concept of either the geo family or the adepti family dynamic, and enjoy the interpretations of a Zhongli riddled with parental instinct and pride for their children, a soft promise to make their lives better than the one he's currently living, and for them to strive to aim higher than he has.
5. Zhongli is a Mess/Zhongli Needs a Hug
- "just give him a hug, he's been through a lot," the fic is the go too.
- Zhongli is the comfort character you dump your feelings and baggage into, and it manifests into this possibly 20k word long fic that you drop out of nowhere and never open again.
- You have mitski in your playlist, you listen to it and once you reach first love/late spring you're already crying your eyes out.
- You have Cavetown in that playlist too, this is home probably hits you like the bus that hit Regina George.
- As the world caves in is a songfic prompt for you.
- Reinaeiry is your bread and butter.
- You wallow in the thought of Zhongli having to kill his friends/lovers/compatriots out of duty and has a weight of legacies and wars on his back every minute he lived as the archon of Liyue.
- You enjoy the intricacy of dissecting the grieving thought process of a struggling character that the words flow like poetry. It's flowery in that deathly hollow way, something reserved and better left alone, yet pried open and cut into sometimes consumable pieces of content.
- Hurt Zhongli hits differently. It's as if you're watching the man fall and succumb to erosion and time, filled with despair and grief as the regret that he has lived, and the actions he had done, weigh in his mind like a sword of Damocles. The contracts he's pursued, the life he's lived through, and what amounts of what he's given, and never taken back. A crack in the earth reveals the soil beneath, and even then it's painted in obscurity.
- You've been through something rough and are self projecting onto your favourite, resident grandpa, who coincidentally has been through a lot as well. It's comforting, even though he isn't real.
- You indulge in the angst because it's the only thing that makes you feel anything remotely these days. You probably need a break, please take care of yourself.
Thank you for reading my ramble lol. It's a new year, with even newer experiences and I sincerely wish everyone the best! Please take care of yourselves!
SUMMARY: Osial exacts a unique kind of revenge on Zhongli.
WARNING(S): Tentacles, overstim, oral, anal, non-con, size kink, creampie, cum inflation, mentions of exhibitionism
CHARACTER(S): Human!Osial, Zhongli
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Damn. I- Damn. I have sinned.
It was a rather uneventful day at Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. Not that Zhongli wanted people to die, but so far, literally nothing had happened.
Zhongli sighed, halfheartedly organizing the record books on his elegant wooden shelf. He paced back and forth in his office, wondering if he had enough time to take a walk around Liyue Harbor before the customer arrived.
He glanced at the clock. Nearly four hours until the appointment; cleaning his office had taken less time than he'd hoped it would. Yes, it would be enough time for a stroll.
Zhongli was just shrugging on his jacket when a voice rumbled behind him. A voice that brought back memories of endless battles, of days that bled into nights that bled into his nightmares.
"So this is the mortal role you have assumed, Morax?"
Zhongli whipped around. Few things could startle the ex-Archon, but he had been alone in his office, he was certain.
Well, he was no longer alone.
There was a... a thing standing behind him, looming over Zhongli. It had the upper half of a well-muscled man, but its lower half was made of watery blue tentacles . There were more tentacles protruding from the creature's shoulders and back. Some of the tentacles had dragon-like heads, white eyes glowing in their aqueous skulls.
Its pale blue skin was made of fish-like scales, shimmering as if coated in water. It—he—had intense sky-blue eyes and indigo hair. Tiny oysters and corals dotted the man's upper body, as if he had been sleeping in the sea for eons.
In the sea...
"Osial?" Zhongli blurted. "How—"
"Your precious harbor is not in danger," Osial rumbled, swiftly crossing the room toward Zhongli. His horde of tentacles followed, reaching toward the consultant. "Only a tiny, insignificant portion of my power is here. The rest lies under the sea."
A tentacle slapped over Zhongli's mouth. "Mmmf!" he cried, thrashing as more tentacles took hold of his wrists and ankles. They lifted him into the air, pulling off his shoes.
"In fact, I cannot summon hard or sharp objects," Osial mused, watching Zhongli struggle against the onslaught of tentacles. "I can only summon soft, watery, harmless things." He stepped—or rather, glided—forward, ripping Zhongli's shirt open with his bare hands. "But there are ways to inflict without drawing blood."
A dozen small tentacles, each as thick as Zhongli's thumb, snaked their way toward his naked chest. A few began to circle around his exposed buds, gently brushing the tender pink skin.
Zhongli's eyes widened as he realized what Osial was doing, and his thrashing grew wilder and more desperate.
"Look at you, Morax," Osial laughed. "Helpless." Zhongli arched his back as soft tentacles began to stroke his neck. Some of them had little O-shaped mouths that attached to his skin and sucked.
"Mmmf..." Against his will, Zhongli could feel himself getting hard. His head started spinning from the tingles of pleasure, and he writhed harder, trying to resist.
It was hopeless. All four of his limbs were kept firmly apart from each other, and he could do nothing as the seagod tore off his pants. Zhongli tried to press his knees together as Osial's gaze raked over his naked body.
"Already hard!" Osial sneered. "What was that you used to say, Morax? You shall suffer the wrath of the rock? Well, let us see how great that rock is."
The tentacles lifted Zhongli's hips so he was horizontal. Several thick tentacles slid around Zhongli's thighs and waist, making escape impossible. The ex-Archon let out a muffled scream as Osial leaned forward, his lips brushing the tip of Zhongli's cock.
"You are already throbbing and dripping," Osial said mockingly. "I did not know it took this little to weaken the Geo Archon." He began to suck on Zhongli's cock, curling a long, serpentine tongue around it.
"Mmmmf—mmmh—nnngh—hnnnngh..." Zhongli's muffled shouts of protest turned to moans as Osial stimulated his cock. "Mmmmgh..." Zhongli shuddered, his eyes rolling back in his head from the pleasure. The tentacles began to suck on his chest. "Mmmmf!" He felt tentacles brush up and down the insides of his thighs.
"Mmmmf—MMMF!" Zhongli's hips spasmed as he came, the stimulation proving too much for even an ex-Archon. Osial chuckled, pulling his mouth away and watching with amusement as Zhongli's cock spurted thick, long, ropes of white cum. Zhongli's hands and feet trembled as he came down from his high.
"Mmmmf..." Zhongli lifted his head, trying to catch Osial's eyes. He caught a glimpse of his own thighs and stomach dripping with his own cum. "Mmmmf! Hnnngf!"
"We're not quite done yet," Osial smiled as more tentacles lunged for Zhongli. "Almost four hours until you're wanted, yes? Four hours is not a lot... but it will do."
Zhongli writhed helplessly as his cock was engulfed by a tentacle. It began to suck on him, tiny tentacles stroking his slit and tip. "Mmmf! Mmmf! MMMF!"
"I am well aware that you just reached your peak," Osial said. "But once is not enough, Morax. After all, you struck me down twice, did you not?"
Zhongli could not reply, for he was in the grasp of a second orgasm, his cum shooting into the tentacle. His eyes crossed from the overwhelming pleasure as the mouth-like appendage milked his cock.
Zhongli screamed through the tentacle over his mouth as he felt a tentacle probing at his hole, his body already extra-sensitive from the two orgasms. The tentacle smeared its wetness over him before plunging in.
"Mmmf—mmmh—mm—mmmgh..." Zhongli moaned, nearly sobbing from the sensation as the tentacle found his sweet spot. "Mmmmmh!" Another tentacle pressed just below his balls, pressing his prostate against the first. He bucked from the pleasure, his knees shaking.
"Ah, yes... those are the spots you like," Osial mused, sending a second tentacle into Zhongli's hole. Each was the girth of a finger. "I wonder how long it will take for me to render you speechless by touching those parts of your body."
Zhongli wailed as the two tentacles massaged his prostate, the overstimulated sweet spot throbbing as Zhongli came again. His cock twitched pathetically in the grip of the tentacle-mouth as Osial smiled.
Osial uncovered Zhongli's mouth. "Let us hear you, Morax. I would like to know what effect this has on you."
"No! Stop! Stop!" Zhongli cried, feeling a fourth orgasm build. "Stop it! No! No more! Please! No more, Osial! Please! I beg of you, no more!" He howled as he came, his body jerking wildly.
"A-Ahh..." Zhongli whimpered as the tentacles held him in the air by his waist. They let go of his legs, which twitched and dangled uselessly. His cum slowly dripped down his thighs. He moaned as a third tentacle entered his hole. He was helpless against the unending waves of pleasure.
Zhongli came again, shuddering, too weak to do anything other than moan softly. He closed his eyes, a tight knot throbbing in his core from all the pleasure. "O-Osial... p-please... no more..." His hole was throbbing and clenching around the tentacles. Osial watched this with great interest.
"Hm. Perhaps you are ready now," the seagod rumbled.
"Ready for what?" Zhongli asked. Osial ignored his question.
The tentacles turned Zhongli around, positioning him so he was on his hands and knees, facing away from Osial. The three tentacles pulled out of him, leaving him fully exposed to the seagod. Zhongli felt something wet splatter abundantly against his hole.
"Yes, that is enough," Osial murmured. "Good."
Zhongli suddenly realized what was happening. "No! No!" he cried, trying to twist away. "Not that! Anything but that!" Osial put his hands on Zhongli's lower back, gently spreading his cheeks.
"No! No!" Zhongli shouted, thrashing wildly as Osial lined up with his entrance. Zhongli couldn't see how big Osial was, but he could guess. "No! Please..." He writhed against the tentacles, but they only tightened their grip on him. "No..."
"You'll be alright," Osial said amiably. "You're the great and mighty Morax, yes?" He pressed his tip against Zhongli's hole, gently stretching him.
"Ah... ah... t-too big... please..." Zhongli felt tears fall his eyes as Osial pushed the tip in, his hole spasming around him. "A-ah! Can't..." The ex-Archon gasped as Osial pushed in further, Zhongli's body burning from the strain. He whimpered, his hole clenching pathetically around Osial.
"Relax," Osial rumbled. "Or you will surely not enjoy what comes next." He gently squeezed Zhongli's hips.
"N-Next?" Zhongli rasped. "W-What do you—ahh—AHHH—" Osial pushed in deeper, every ridge of his cock sliding deliciously against Zhongli's body. The seagod sighed happily, letting Zhongli dangle there for a while. The ex-Archon quickly realized that squirming would only stimulate himself, so he stayed as still as possible, whimpering.
The pain of the stretch began to fade. Osial purred as Zhongli stopped tensing up, his hole relaxing a little. "O-Osial," Zhongli whispered. "If you're not here to hurt me, then... then what are you..."
He broke off with a gasp as Osial pressed Zhongli to his chest, his cock nudging against his sweet spot. The consultant's eyes rolled back in his head, his tongue lolling out of his mouth. He panted, a delirious smile edging his lips.
"I don't intend to hurt you," Osial whispered. "But I will make you submit to me, no matter what it takes."
Osial began to bounce Zhongli gently. With every slight movement, his prostate throbbed with pleasure. It was too much, too much, Osial's gentle thrusts that made his body hum with bliss and the tentacles slithering around and squeezing his cock. Zhongli arched his back, unable to form words as euphoria surged through his body.
"I—I—ahhh—" Zhongli cried out weakly as he came again, cum spurting all over his thighs. Osial chuckled, watching Zhongli's fingers twitch. He slumped forward, his hair falling over his eyes.
"Your stamina is commendable," Osial remarked. "The perks of being divine, I suppose." He continued to overstimulate Zhongli, who barely heard a word.
Zhongli lost track of time. After his fifth, or maybe sixth, or maybe tenth orgasm, Osial suddenly grunted and sped up, pulling out further before slamming in.
"Ahh... no..." Zhongli whimpered. "T-Too much..." His legs spasmed as Osial fucked him through yet another orgasm, tears sliding down his cheeks. His cock was sliding in and out so fast, Zhongli thought he might go insane. His lower half was a mess of throbbing pleasure, tired numbness, and cum. "Too... much..."
Tentacles hovered over the ex-Archon's face and chest, their watery tips shuddering slightly with each of Osial's frantic thrusts. Zhongli could see a white liquid rising in each of them.
"Hrngh!" Osial growled, slamming all the way in. Zhongli gasped for air, the wind knocked out of him from the impact. He came just before Osial did, the seagod's cum exploding deep inside him.
Thick, hot seed burst from every tentacle, coating Zhongli's limp, trembling body. Osial roared from the bliss, grabbing Zhongli's hair and pulling his head up to arch his back.
"Please..." Zhongli breathed, barely audible. He moaned, feeling his body grow heavier from the added weight of the seagod. He pressed his hands to his belly, realizing with a jolt of fear that he could feel Osial's cum.
"We're not done yet," Osial growled, slapping Zhongli's ass. The ex-Archon shuddered as Osial gripped his hips again.
After hours of excruciating, agonizing orgasms that left Zhongli feeling like a hollow shell, a mere cocksleeve filled to the brim with cum until he felt like he would burst, his cock dripping pathetically, Osial finally stopped and pulled out with a satisfied grunt.
Zhongli would have collapsed if not for the tentacles that held him up in the air, his hole wide and gaping, his throbbing pink cock trembling, his body splattered with white. Cum poured from his hole, making a large puddle on the floor. Zhongli moaned.
"Mmm... very good." Osial tilted his head, admiring his work. "Now, time to clean up," he said, smiling. "Your appointment is in ten minutes."
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Title: Shine Like Gold
Pairing: Azhdaha/Zhongli, Osial/Zhongli, Eventual Azhdaha/Zhongli
Rating: PG-13 (Rating may change in the future)
Language: English
Fate is indeed cruel and stubborn. When someone tries to change its destined course, it will resist. But that doesn’t mean it completely objects the change in minor details as long as it can obtain the same end result.
The moment Zhongli decided to challenge fate, the history as he has known it becomes twisted.
But fate too can sometimes be kind. For it has another plan; one that speaks volume for its sense of humor and the love for irony.
---
In short, the current Zhongli time-travels back to millennia ago, when the Archon War is still boiling.
