Hi! Welcome to my blog ! I created it to learn more about and connect with alterhuman, otherhuman, alterbeing and nonhuman communities.
This blog contains educational content about alter/nonhumanity, fun stuff, important stuff, my opinion on controversial topics, le poisson Steeve, and my personal experiences.
My tags
For those who need a little comforting moment, I have selected posts that might make you smile and feel good and I have tagged them with the tag "🏳️🌈🐾 positivity" in my archives ;3
Here is totally a safe place for:
alterhumans (including factkins)
nonhumans (including nonhumans factkins)
otherhumans (including factkins)
alterbeing
furries
those who are questioning
queer beings
quadrobists
otherpaws
those who have a plural system (including endogenics ones)
those who support/respect those who are welcome
beings just wanting to be informed
NO CONTACT paraphiles
haters/antis who are no longer haters/antis
乁| ･ 〰 ･ |ㄏidk who add
Here isn't a safe place for:
pro contact paraphiles and supporters
antikin, antilink, antifur, queerphobe, and anyone who wants to physically or mentally harm those who are welcome.
anyone who harms/do not respect someone or something.
Trump and his supporters
I still don't know who add ┐( ˘_˘)┌
⋇⊶⊰❣⊱⊷⋇ ⋇⊶⊰❣⊱⊷⋇⋇⊶⊰❣⊱⊷⋇ ⋇⊶⊰❣⊱⊷⋇
My hobbies : I love art, I draw a lot (usually on sheets of paper, sometimes digitally) I also do quadrobics and climb trees. I take care of my pets, I observe animals outside, I look at the planets with my (small) telescope, I read, I collect vulture culture, I'm listening to music, any other activities in nature, and many other things.
My parents don't know that I have a Tumblr account so if I've been inactive for a while it means I must have deleted it or just abandoned it. I don't like lying to them, but without the community on Tumblr, I think my mental health wouldn't be very good... (They don't know I'm alter/nonhuman)
I assure you that I am extremely careful on social networks, I know that you shouldn't joke about that.
I prefer to warn <3
Later, when I can, I will try to educate the French alterhuman, alterbeing and nonhuman communities.
If you want to see my alterhuman journey, watch after the cut :3 /nf
[TW : Intense species dysphoria and depression, family issues the following is not only about that but I prefer to warn you. I tell you how I got out of all this with ✨positivity✨]
𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𓍊𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𓍊𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𓍊𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼
I awakened in the 4 February 2024. That's when I noticed that I wasn't just a person with a lot of imagination.
But it's a long story ;3
As far as I can remember, I've never felt completely human. I have always had animal behaviors/needs. At first I thought it was a game and I thought that ✨ one day I would turn into a magical creature who will save the planet from pollution ✨(I really believed it ^^') In my head, it was simple: I was a magical creature capable of transforming into several different animals/creatures, I had to watch over the Earth but humans were starting to become too dangerous so I found a way to become the child of a family and start a life as a human to learn more about this species and find a solution to fix everything, and later transform into my true form to make everything better.(I shortened the lore I created around this)
Finally, I grew up, and I noticed that this story didn't hold water. I stopped believing in all that, because I had made it all up, right?
All ?
I had effortlessly let go of this crazy story (I didn't really believe in it anymore at the end so...) but I still didn't feel human, I continued to have animal experiences... I returned to the starting point. Why do I feel like this? This time I didn't want to make up a weird story like I did in the past (I wouldn't even believe it anyway)... So I thought I was crazy.
I felt bad, extremely bad about my identity.
This time it wasn't completely because of my gender and species dysphoria (I didn't know what the word dysphoria meant at the time), I just felt crazy. Deep down, I knew that wasn't really the case. But I didn't listen to myself. Who wants to listen to a crazy person, anyway?
Later, I decided to create a clothing style more related to fantastic animals or creatures, to feel better. (unconsciously, I created gears for myself)
And even later, on YouTube shorts, I found a strange video where I saw a masked person running around on all fours I was looking for something else, so I didn't really watch the video. If people like to pretend to be an animal, as long as they like it and it doesn't hurt anyone, why not?
And I found another video. Then two. Then three, four, five, six, etc.I finally gave in and watched these videos.
And there is the flash.
I admired the impressive jumps and the magnificent masks based on animals and nature. Before, I thought it was a hobby, looking for the animal that most resembles you, and doing quadrobics. I needed this "hobby" to escape my dysphoria and anxiety... Besides, I thought the members of the community were called furries. But I noticed that in a lot of these videos it said "you don't choose to be a therian" or "theriantropy isn't just gears and quads", so I did some research .
And I discovered the actual definition. I discovered MY definition! This part of myself, A WHOLE COMMUNITY HAS FEELINGS SIMILAR TO MINE?????????!!!!!!!!
I discovered the definition of therian. Then that of otherkin, otherhearted, nonhuman, plantkin, otherlink, ockin, fictionkith, ect.
I learned a lot about these communities, before deciding to learn about myself.
The fact that I found a term and communities that fit me unfortunately did not stop my species dysphoria from growing, as it had done so well before. I probably had depression. I haven't been diagnosed, but I did my research and it looks very similar... To feel nothing, not even sadness, only despair. A despair that seeps into a body, to stab the heart and compress the ribcage of its victim. It was horrible, words can't describe it.
I came out of it after 7 months of fighting, alone. I didn't talk about it much to the online community, I felt quite uncomfortable talking about it. I came out, I fell a few times, but a little less deep, I managed to get out quickly. Then I picked up my emotions one by one, sadness first. Even if it's not the best emotion, what a pleasure to feel something!
Then I just felt a huge anxiety. That was also horrible, I only got out some months later. Alone at first, then with my sister. And yes, I came out to her at the end of October 2024! She supports me (and all the community) and that has helped me a lot.
Then I started to recover from all of that. I had found some of my emotions again, love not long really ago, anger, and and sometimes I found myself looking forward to something! My hope was reborn, and was growing timidly. I found the taste for life again, and I rebuilt myself stronger. I realized how important feelings are, Now I enjoy these sensations that I have been deprived of for a while. My dysphoria still exists, but I feel more and more species euphoria !
I have (after more than 8 months of research) finally discovered my theriotype! I'm a puma. I'm pretty sure of it.
It helps a lot that my sister supports me, I can be myself ! Of course she's not a therian so she doesn't understand everything and she's not the most mature person on this planet, but she's quite interested in my identity and calls my hands "paws"!... It's really too sweet every time she does that I want to cry
And she awakened as fictionkin not long ago !
It's much better.
-I've finally almost recovered all my emotions, and now I love life, even more than I loved it before. I am not afraid anymore. As long as I do not relapse, I am happy. Despite some family problems that arose not so long ago, I'm holding up.
-During my vacation, I reflected on what caused my naturehearty/theriantropia. Because yes, I naturally have a feline demeanor and an attraction to nature, but I feel there's more to it than that. After some research, I discovered that I actually have childhood traumas (I was the first to be surprised) that gave me a fear of attachment. I'll skip the details, but I was always alone in my childhood until I was in fifth grade. I was rejected because I was weird and my parents didn't let me do as many things as they did. I was also precocious, which didn't help the gap. I then had a string of toxic friendships, the kind of bond that turns into harassment and turns everyone against me... So I preferred to stay alone all the time, it's less painful and I'm used to it.
My parents do their best, but they don't let me do much. Even crying is a risk, and the unintentional comments they make sometimes hurt. Their presence makes me rather uncomfortable, and I have trouble remembering any part of my childhood, so there must be more to it. They don't take me seriously and only compliment me on my good grades, at the same time it's the only real thing they know about me. They like a facade, not really me. But I accepted it.
Because of family problems we are going to move into council housing, after three years it was time! I was tired of sleeping on the sofa, I mean I'm not difficult but as a territorial being I need a indoor territory ^^'
-After a not-so-pleasant vacation, I'm finally in a new establishment where I can rebuild myself, and where I might be able to be completely myself. But even if that's not the case for now, I'm so happy to finally like my daily life!!!
I express myself much more, not with flashy gear but with LGBT and alterhuman pins! My clothing style finally reflects me and I WILL FINALLY HAVE A DEN GUYYYSS !!
-I've mooved to the apartment for two months now, and it's so much better! There are still a lot of family problems, I almost relapsed into depression, and I have anxiety, but it's getting better. I'm mostly stressed about my studies and my future, but I know it will be cooler to be an adult, even if it will involve responsibilities. I'm already a bit too mature in my head, so it wouldn't bother me to much. I'm now talking to a school nurse, she's very nice and even though I can't really talk about my alterhumanity or LGBT identities (it's too hard for now...), she helps me a lot with my trauma and studies!
I'm going to work in the field of animal and plant conservation, the environment, and all that. I'll probably go to university, and I'm currently making some important decisions about my future. Life no longer seems so posed, it feels good!
I still have some questions to answer about myself, but that doesn't bother me. On the contrary, it makes me want to move forward, to continue this adventure.
My introspection is unlikely to stop, ;)
𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𓍊𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𓍊𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼𓍊𖡼𖤣𖥧𖡼𓋼𖤣𖥧𓋼
A big thanks for reading! It was very a bit long I know but oh well I do what I want >:3
