I just read your explanation of QPPs and it was really helpful but I was wondering if you wouldn't mind explaining the difference between a committed, intimate relationship and a romantic relationship? I'm also a relationship anarchist and I often find the connection I have with close friends is indistinguishable from a romantic connection, with the only difference being the boundaries and expectations around intimacy and commitment, so I have a really hard time wrapping my head around QPPs.
･ﾟ*: ~ Sorry for the delay I have issues ~ : * ･ﾟ
This one is actually a lot harder to explain, but thanks for asking! I’m an RA myself, in addition to being aro-spec. I mostly ID as quoiromantic, which means I personally don’t experience a clear distinction between romantic attraction and other types of attraction.
The difference between a romantic relationship and a non-romantic relationship that is nonetheless committed and intimate will really depend on who you ask. For some people, the difference is in what ways they chose to show affection and how they choose to navigate their relationship with the rest of the world, but for most people the difference is entirely internal.
So, some people would say a romantic relationship is different because they call it romantic, they go on dates, maybe they celebrate valentines and anniversaries, that kind of thing. For other people, a romantic relationship might look exactly the same as a friendship, it just feels different to the people in it. Similarly, a QP relationship might look the same as a romantic relationship, but feel different to people in it.
I know from the description I’ve heard from people who experience romantic attraction that they kind of attraction I experience isn’t the same, but explaining the exact differences would be difficult and my explanation wouldn’t necessarily be the same as another aro person’s.
