#parenthing

[andinimasito]

Kirana. Kalau Mba Andin boleh minta satu doa yang bisa di kabulkan allah untuk kirana, Mba Andin berdoa semoga kirana sehat dari sakit gatelnya ya nak. Biar pipinya yang gembil itu mulus, gak garuk garuk lagi, happy, sayang lama lama sama kirana. Di sehatkan ya kirana sama allah. Aamiin . . . Ibok makasih sudah bawa penggembira hati tergemas ini ya bok. @retnohening . . #inspiringpeople #kids #inspiringkids #parenthink #parenthing

[babieslounge-blog]

BEST CRIBS WITH CHANGING TABLE COMBO

Decorating the room for your child is a very exciting and important milestone in… Read more!

[hereslookinatyoukids]

[syainaulfahazhara]

Tujuh tahun pertama perlakukan anakmu bagaikan raja, tujuh tahun kedua perlakukan anakmu sebagaimana tawanan perang dalam kedisiplinan, dan tujuh tahun berikutnya dan seterusnya jadikan anakmu seperti sahabat dan teman.

Imam Ali karamallahu wajhah

[whenthebabysleeps]

Mama's playlist

Everyone has a labour playlist, right? Not sure how many of us actually use it, mind, but I for one spent many happy hours compiling songs to listen to while I had my baby. I chose uplifting favourites, upbeat energisers and a few quiet ones for the down time. Come the day putting music on was the farthest thing from my mind. We sat up all night listening to 6music of course, but putting on the playlist just didn't occur to me. And in the hospital it was out of the question since nobody would have heard it over the audible river of bodily fluids...

So while labour playlists are useless what every new mum really needs is a playlist for after the baby is born. Songs to give you confidence for the terror known as bringing-home-the-baby. Songs to cheer you on when you realise how hard it is to get that baby fed (however you do it, I hasten to add). Songs for the middle of the night, for the days that seem to start 5 minutes after the last one ended and for those evenings that seem too far away for you to make it. Songs, basically, will get you through. And they can help you capture those unfathomable highs too; they're somewhere safer to put your emotions than directly onto your fragile, precious newborn. Which you may break by accident, remember?

So I've taken the liberty of kicking off with a mini-list of my own. Songs that will forever remind me of my boy's first weeks and my first days as a mother. Enjoy...

Kate Bush This Woman's Work 

Pray god, you can cope...

The first of many songs-that-broke-me post-birth. In a good way. The intensity. The sweetness. The hope and fear and 'can I do this?' feeling that for me, dominated those early weeks. Being on the brink of something totally awesome and trying to let go. Oh Kate!

Bjork Hyperballad

I go through all this before you wake up, so I can feel happier... safe up here with you

What speaks to me about this song and motherhood is that intense relationship, which is sort of driving you to the edge of what you can take. So you find a little spot for yourself where you can express some of your bigger, scarier feelings or just be quiet, mindful and baby-free. Bjork goes up a mountain and throws cutlery off it. I sat in the car and had a can of Holsten Pils. Same same but different.

Dan Michaelson & The Coastguards If Not For You

I've been holding you for so long. Can't feel any more in my heart. And if not for you, what am I for?

This is the song to accompany the 'oh god, I'm a mother' moments you have. This was in fact the first song I heard after giving birth as I tried to block out the sound effects of a noisy post-labour ward. You know, the sounds of other people's babies crying and all that mama-wind knocking around those post-natal wards (you know what I'm talking about, newbies). It will hit you again, and again, and again. I'm sure you still have them when your kid's 32 and turning up for Christmas. But golly, you're a mother, aren't you? Nuts. 

The Shirelles Mama Said

"Mama told me there'd be days like this..."

Yup, she did. Remember? A must play song for those kinds of days. We all have 'em.

Band of Horses Nobody's Gonna Love You 

"You are the ever living ghost of what once was..."

This falls into the category of songs I reinterpreted after having my boy. Essentially all love songs became about having a baby, not a boyfriend. All that wham bam, love at first sight stuff? "Oh! It's about having a baby!" I thought. Golly, and the number of songs I thought were actually about breastfeeding is a bit embarrassing. Down to the Wire by Neil Young? Totally about breastfeeding. Just listen!

Anyway, cheesy as this song may be, I love it. When I heard this 2 weeks after becoming a mum I was in bits. OH! This is why mum's hate all their son's girlfriends right? Because, nobody ain't gonna love this kid more than I do. Sorry girls.

Boy George Coming Home

I don't know what I used to be, but everyday I'm feeling more like me. I've been gone too long, I'm coming home.

This was the track that made me think about making a new parent's playlist. Boy George nails those feeling like myself moments that come to you along the way, at moments many and varied. When the early days feel like inhabiting another country coming home can seem a long way off, with a complicated multi-leg journey ahead for which you don't have the right tickets. However far away home feels, girl, you'll make it. So for now... put this on, turn it up and come on home.

Photo by Adrian Pratt and reproduced from Flickr

[oinstitute]

Tell a lie or die

My kids asked me this question this evening. "Daddy, what do you choose? Tell a lie or die?"

Dad:  I choose to tell the truth

son: "So you choose to die?"

Dad: " No, I choose to tell the truth."

My confused son: "but there is only two choices."

Dad:  "No such thing."

Sometimes relationships are better with a little confusion.