you know what's hard being me? it's when my parents always scold me for things that i miserably fail and after that they give me lessons about it. they always say, "are you listening?" "do you even listen?" yes ma, yes i am. i'm trying to be perfect but it's me who's not listening. i am listening, am trying to be the best for you so that you won't come home nagging me about not doing anythingㅡalmost shouting at me when i space out in blank. what also disappoints me also is that everytime they keep giving me these advices, i don't use them. i wake up past 10, sleep past 12, have no motivation but sleep, eat, watch tv then repeat, do it again and again.
i hate that. i hate that i feel as if i'm just another problem in their lives, i hate that i feel like a disappointment to them just because i don't bring good news about school, i'm not part of the honor's list. i hate me, but i also love me.