#park cod

[abelofdaughter]

[maumausie]

Very sleepy so I’m ranking how I think Cold War Characters would cuddle

Bell: 4/10. Theyre very stiff at first, but they soak up the attention like a sponge so it’s not bad

Park: 0/10. Her idea of cuddling is sitting three feet apart while working.

Woods: 5/10. He’s good at bear hugs, and theyre comforting, but he’s not good at sustained cuddling

Mason: 7/10. He’s so very touch staved after his wife died. Someone PLEASE cuddle this man.

Lazar: 10/10. Incredible. Showstopping. Amazing. He plays with your hair.

Hudson: 1/10. He doesn’t touch anyone but his wife. It’s 10/10 for her and her ONLY.

Adler: -70000/10. He injects you with substances and talks about his ex-wife the whole time

Perseus: 4/10. Decent except he won’t stop yapping about how superior he is to the Americans

Arash: 0/10. Fucking shoots you.

[pyxis-stellae]

I made something

Shall I do more?

[maumausie]

How am I supposed to write a sociology essay (boring) (makes me want to hit myself with hammers) when I can think about Call of Duty: Cold War (fun) (sexy) instead?

[maumausie]

MINOR SAFE VERSION 💕

Happy Pride month, y’all :)

This episode— Black Ops: Cold War

Next Episode— Ghosts

Russell Adler— regularly uses the f slur. In denial of his bisexuality.

Eleazar “Lazar” Azoulay— very straight, but the flavor of straight where he CHUGS respect women juice. Also doesn’t mind a a skirt special occasions, but not often.

Bell— Barely conscious of gender roles ever since the brainwashing. Considers themselves to be neither man or woman, since that would require being anything beyond an attack dog. Aromantic and mostly Asexual.

Jason Hudson— straight, unless you get him wine-drunk. His wife is very supportive. Used to do drag for cash.

Alex Mason— Bisexual, prefers men. Thought he was “cured” when he married his wife. (He was not.)

Helen Park— aromantic, ace-spec. Always has a special fondness for girls and has slept with plenty before, though, so she assumes that she’s just a picky masc lesbian.

Perseus— have you SEEN him? Gay. No questions asked.

Lawrence Sims— his wife is bisexual, and they go to pride events together, but he always makes it clear that he’s an ally ONLY. (What happened in ‘Nam stayed in ‘Nam)

Frank Woods— that is a gay man. They invented the f slur specifically for him. He is a Bear. He’s very protective of younger gays on the rare occasion someone (usually David) drags him out to a pride event.

[maumausie]

It’s pride month. You know what that means.

This episode— Black Ops: Cold War

Next episode— Ghosts

Minors: DNI. This post is full of allusions to aspects of LGBTQIA+ history that is not safe for kiddos. SFW/minor safe version will be posted soon.

Russell Adler— regularly uses the f slur. In denial of his bisexuality.

Eleazar “Lazar” Azoulay— very straight, but the flavor of straight where he loves being smacked around by women. He loves himself some leather. Also doesn’t mind a little crossdressing on special occasions, but it isn’t his favorite.

Bell— Barely conscious of gender roles ever since the brainwashing. Considers themselves to be neither man or woman, since that would require being anything beyond an attack dog. Aromantic. Has a weird psychosexual thing going on with Adler & sometimes Park but otherwise is repulsed by sex as a concept.

Jason Hudson— straight, unless you get him wine-drunk. His wife is very supportive. Used to do drag for cash.

Alex Mason— Bisexual, prefers men. Thought he was “cured” when he married his wife. (He was not.)

Helen Park— aromantic, ace-spec. Used to work in a BDSM dungeon before she joined MI6, but she never really got off on it, just enjoyed inflicting pain. Always a special fondness for girls and has slept with plenty before, though, so she assumes that she’s just a picky masc lesbian.

Perseus— have you SEEN him? Gay. No questions asked.

Lawrence Sims— his wife is bisexual, and they go to pride events together, but he always makes it clear that he’s an ally ONLY. (He slept with several men in ‘Nam, but he insists that he isn’t queer because of it)

Frank Woods— that is a gay man. They invented the f slur specifically for him. He is a Bear. He’s very protective of younger gays on the rare occasion someone (usually one of the Masons) drags him out to a pride event.