Beyond the Pedestal: Growing Up as a Pastor’s Kid
As an adult, I don’t always tell people that I am a "Pastor’s Kid" (PK). It’s not because I am ashamed. It is because people often give me a "strange look" when they find out. They either think I am a perfect person who knows the whole Bible, or they judge me because I don't meet their high standards.
Growing up, I felt like an actress. To me, the church felt like "show business." I felt like everyone was watching me, waiting for me to make a mistake. Many people don't realize how hard this is for a child. I had to choose: should I be my real self, or should I just pretend? I chose to pretend because I was afraid people would not like the real me.
This caused a lot of "church hurt”. I wondered why people judged me so quickly. I was just a kid trying to find my own faith in God, but I wasn't allowed to be imperfect. To survive, I became a "people pleaser." I wanted everyone to see me as obedient, but inside, I was hurting.
Everything changed at a conference when a pastor named Daniel Khong prayed for all the Pastor’s Kids. He is a PK too, so he understood us. He knew we needed healing and grace. I am so thankful for that moment.
Today, I realize that we should give this same grace to everyone.
We should not judge each other. None of us are perfect. While being imperfect isn't an excuse to keep sinning, it is a reason to be kind. We must remember: We cannot change people; only God can. Our job is simply to show His love and grace to others. Let’s leave the changing part to Him.
