“Professor Lupin continued, ‘The Patronus is a kind of positive force, a projection of the very things that the Dementor feeds upon – hope, happiness, the desire to survive… Many qualified wizards have difficulty with it.’”
Dementors, as many of us know, symbolize depression, anxiety, that negative, all-consuming energy. To combat these, one must summon their happiest memories and cast Expecto Patronum, or ‘I await a protector,“ who is in fact oneself. On the path to healing, it takes a great deal of strength, courage, and determination to create something so powerful against something so life-draining.
I struggle with eating issues, depression, and anxiety. People have tried to control my body and mind through years of abuse. In looking for a tattoo, I wanted something empowering, a way to reclaim my body for myself alone. A reminder of all the healing I’ve created, a source of strength and pride. Foxes are known for being cunning, full of life, and able to adapt. The Pottermore quiz gave me this as a Patronus.
I chose the placement across my self-harm scars, not as a means of forgetting them or making them beautiful, for I have come to peace with their images, but to write a new story for myself. One that no one else defines. Harry Potter shapes so much of my life and was always there through times when I felt most alone. Every day, I learn new ways to heal myself, especially with my significant other who has been with me through this process.
My artist, @sierra_tattoo_art , is incredibly talented and made my crazy ideas into a truly beautiful work of art. This whole experience was so meditative, therapeutic, and I am filled with such joy.
Now that my first tattoo is healed, every time I see it, bravery rises, encouraging me to step into myself. Here’s to new chapters of love and happiness, of strength in the face of whatever will come and the knowledge that I protect myself with the goodness I find 💙
