#pepperpottslikesasks

[imjusta-maninacan]

//Sorry guys I don't really feel like RPing tonight. I know I owe a couple of people.

[manwiththeglowinthedarkheart]

Listen, I heard from your mun that maybe... maybe you feel upset because I don't see you as one of my best friends alongside Steve and Bruce... but there's a reason for that Pepper. It's because you're more than that. Not just the love of my life... but the other half of myself. Without you, I'm so incomplete. Even the last night I just felt empty and lost. I wandered around mindlessly. I didn't think about anything but you. I love you, Pepper. You hold my heart, and my thoughts, and my eye... because you're so perfect and you're such a huge piece of my life and you're so gorgeous that nothing could ever come near the place that you are. "Best friend" would be insulting to what you are. I can't say it. I'm sorry.

But I... I know from last night that I want you to feel comfortable. I want you to be happy. I hate seeing you jealous because I feel there's nothing I can do. I could... hold you, and kiss you, and tell you I love you but that feels cheap compared to what you actually need... but I don't know what it is you need. All I know is that I ... I was so excited, Pepper, when you agreed to having another baby. Because you're so... you're my rock. My rock. You make me feel safe and comfortable even when facing one of my greatest fears. You make me want to leap head-first into the life of a father again. That's a place... I never wanted to go before Rebecca. And when we had her, sure, we kind of sucked. But now I know we could do this all right. And you, and me, and her, and ... and a baby... that's something that I should find so terrifying and yet it excites me like nothing has ever excited me before... I feel a pounding in my heart, Pepper. I remember the last time I felt it was when you walked down the aisle, face covered by that veil... when you stood in front of me and said "I do" with a smile on your face. That same, wonderful, "Yes, Mr. Stark" smile you always gave me. That's why I wanted it so bad... can you understand? That happiness that goes hand in hand with fear for the future that goes hand in hand with the comfort that things will be okay because you're there for me... that's what I wanted. That's why I... why I said 'let's have another baby.'

I... just... can you understand Pepper? You're... everything I need. I need you. I love you. I always will, even ... even if we split up. I'd always love you. And I'd be so... broken without you. Because I'd have lost a whole half of myself. I love you Pepper. I love you.

[manwiththeglowinthedarkheart]

Surrogate || Closed RP

Tony tinkered meaninglessly in the basement of his Malibu home. His computer screens all showed various women, but he wasn't looking at any of them. He was screwing together what looked like some sort of walkie-talkie; holding it closer to the magnifying lens over his eyes occasionally to double check his work. He set it down and looked up at the computer screens, covering the lens with his hand, "So the big one. 162 pounds. Kali, or some dumb name like that. You set up the meeting with her, right?"

"Yes, Sir. As you requested. She shall be here approximately an hour after the Mrs. returns home."

"Great," Tony pulled the lens off of his face and tossed it to the side, "And you told her, right?"

"No, Sir. Do forgive me, but Mrs. Stark directly forbade me from bothering her at work today."

"Well, damn. I guess I'll have to do that..." he stood up and made his way through the basement to the stairs. The whole place was filled with various half-completed knickknacks. He was having troubles finishing much of anything lately. He was just too excited.

The kitchen was his destination. He prepared himself for the upcoming evening... the coffee was put on the pot; the cake was in the oven; and most importantly, a box of Cornflakes was resting next to a bowl and a spoon... just in case he needed it, "When's Pepper getting home, Jarvy?"

"She just pulled into the driveway, Sir."

Tony coughed a little, then held his forehead. His excitement drained a little to be replaced with nervousness. Suddenly the world was spinning too fast. He made his way to the couch and sat down, trying his best to calm his nerves in what little time he had before she came in.

[imjusta-maninacan]

On anon gonna break you apparently...? What was your first thought when she missed your hand and fell? [oh God I apologize for this but it's all that came to mind for this "challenge" so...] :/

You- you wanna know-? Ahhh geeziz alright give me a moment to… breathe.

Anyway. I just… I saw my entire… LIFE plummet with her.

I thought “It’s over.” And that’s it. She was my reason to fight, my reason to keep going. I’d failed her for the last time, and there would be no going back and making right.

To be honest, I felt like just… going with her. There was no point to anything to else, so, why the fuck not.

That changed. Quickly. I was so… ANGRY at that son of a bitch for even putting her in that place that I had to go after him. I didn’t care if it accomplished nothing on my own ends. I wasn’t fighting for me.

I was fighting for her.

[imjusta-maninacan]

Redemption: A note to Pepper

I would say I'm sorry, but that just wouldn't cut it.

I would ask for your forgiveness but I doubt I would get it.

But you know what? Scew it. I'm going to anyway.

I wasn't lying when I said you were the one thing I can't live without. I feel like all I've done lately is fuck everything up. I let you down. I scared you away. I made you angry. I pushed you away. And then to top all that off, I let that freak bag get his hands on you. 

All because I wasn't man enough.

I'm not gonna try and make excuses for myself, but I feel like you deserve a run down of what's been going through my mind. (And geeziz there's a lot of things... where do I begin.)

I'm not the same person I was 5 years ago, but of course you already know that, and bless your heart for sticking with me even through all that. I'm trying my damnedest to be everything you want me to be. I honestly feel like I don't deserve you. I wish I could make you happier, I wish I could protect you better, I wish I could make your dreams come true. You've told me over and over again what it is that's not working, but I just don't listen. 

I think it's pretty clear that I've got a lot of my own problems that I need to deal with first before I can even consider taking care of you. After all this, I'm just not worthy, okay? I just- shit I'm gonna stop now.

Truth is, I need you. I always have. I can't deal with this on my own. So here I am, crawling back to you, with no expectation of you taking me back after all I've put you through. 

I love you Pepper.

[imjusta-maninacan]

//Tony's going to write a novel to Pepper. Oops.

[manwiththeglowinthedarkheart]

Starting a Family Round 2 || Closed RP

Tony took a deep breath and ran his fingers through his hair. He had just gotten off the phone with Fury. After just getting off the phone with... someone he had donated a considerable amount of money to. Years ago, when Rebecca was little and things were hectic and terrifying, Tony had given money to a woman named Bonnibel Dean, who had significant findings in the field of recreating the Super Soldier Serum. Tony was naive and optimistic and believed that she actually meant to do good. Now, nearly twenty years later, she had called to inform him that due to his contributions she had made a significant advancement in her research. She had made a clone. A fully living, breathing clone of Captain America. (number 153, she had said, meaning that there were 152 that never 'fully lived and breathed') Tony was in shock. He had never considered that that was what she had been doing... but it was far too late at this point. Fury promised he'd have a top Agent to look into it but at this point Tony was... terrified. Of himself and what he'd done. Of what would happen to the clone. Of what Dean was really doing... and... specifically of telling Pepper that he had contributed to the project to begin with.

"JARVIS, be a super special artificial intelligence and call Pepper up here for me?" he said as he started the coffee maker. Coffee was nice. Coffee calmed nerves, "Tell her it's super important and that she's... gonna be mad at me."

"I'll inform her immediately, Sir."