#personal life;

[fall-of-the-ronin]

((I’m not sure why I’m on here... right now I’m dealing with dysphoria, I’m learning more about myself. I can’t go into much without nsfw but I do wish I had the opposite sex body.))

((Then my cousin is in a coma. She when into intensive surgery the other night. She has cancer and it’s taken over her stomach. We don’t think she’s going to make it...))

((I’ve been distracting myself with videogames lately. I like Balan despite what other’s think of it. Now my joy cons got the drift again. My therapist has been sick and it’s been over a month since I seen her... so yeah. I’m in a slump.))

{((Edit: My cousin is no longer in a coma. She woke up! Holy moly!))

[mendedflowers-blog]

GAAAAHHH HE'S SO SWEET!

This is the first time that's ever happened to me but but but... there's a guy that makes my heart beat and is absolutely such a sweetheart and really kind. I don't know whether or not he has feelings for me and I shouldn't be so ahead of myself but with asking me to dinner and lunch dates and understanding my situation -- I just. I can't. He's. I'm not even so sure anymore.

I don't know if we are either friends or a bond something more and in such a short time. I don't want to rush things but I've become so... so... feelings have become so big and I don't know how to handle or contain them. Let alone, have an experience on what to do. I guess I'm carefully treading on deep waters. 

Whatever the case may be, I'll try to be casual, thoughtful, and genuine about this. Whether or not our bond forms into something more -- we will see.

But right now, I think I'm really crushing hard on him.

P.S: Resigned my job -- going to get my life back.