[12:47] -- tipsiestGamer [TG] began trolling centaursTestimonial [CT] at 00:47 --
[12:47] TG: present
[12:47] CT: D --> I feel like a dang f001
[12:48] CT: D --> Corre%ion
[12:48] CT: D --> I am a danged f001
[12:48] TG: whatd u do
[12:48] CT: D --> I have been speaking to a strider
[12:48] CT: D --> And I can do little to stop this
[12:49] CT: D --> Font of hostility from welling up inside me
[12:49] TG: whats he doing to jack up ur rage
[12:50] CT: D --> Everything
[12:50] CT: D --> He did not think I was real
[12:50] CT: D --> He claims to desire friendship and he will not
[12:50] CT: D --> Give me a single point of di%ussion to focus on
[12:51] TG: im looking at ur blog im guessing its realbrofessional
[12:51] CT: D --> Yes
[12:51] TG: do u want me to talk @ him for u
[12:51] CT: D --> No
[12:51] CT: D --> No, I must
[12:51] CT: D --> Be able to handle this on my own
[12:52] CT: D --> A task I have already failed by bothering you with it
[12:52] TG: u dont have to its just a douche on the internet
[12:52] TG: and im ur friend!! ur not bothering me
[12:53] TG: he does seem kind of like a douche tho for real
[12:54] CT: D --> I cannot parse half of the information I am reading
[12:54] CT: D --> It is like a different language
[12:54] TG: do u mean just the stuff he says
[12:54] TG: or in general
[12:54] TG: bc when ig et mad i have trouble reading too
[12:54] CT: D --> I meant what he is saying
[12:54] CT: D --> But
[12:55] CT: D --> I don't know
[12:56] TG: it just kind of seems like hes calling u a stick in the mud
[12:57] CT: D --> I took great offense to that
[12:57] TG: i dont blame u
[12:58] TG: ur hard to get close to but thats just bc ur a more private conservative kind fo guy and thers nothing wrong w that
[12:58] TG: maybe try turning the conversation to be about him?
[12:59] CT: D --> I do not want to talk about him
[12:59] CT: D --> Or me
[12:59] CT: D --> I only
[12:59] CT: D --> Just
[12:59] CT: D --> I do not know what I am trying to say
[01:00] CT: D --> I feel like this is an issue that is getting worse
[01:00] CT: D --> I hear, but I do not understand
[01:00] CT: D --> And all I can do is
[01:00] TG: maybe take a deep breath and get away from the computer for a minute to help learn ur head?
[01:00] CT: D --> Stare
[01:00] TG: oh
[01:00] TG: has this been happening a lot?
[01:00] TG: clear* ur head btw not learn
[01:01] CT: D --> It has been present since I was young
[01:02] TG: so its just an attention thing?
[01:03] TG: bc it kind of sounds like a sensory overload thing
[01:03] CT: D --> I usually chalked it up to stupidity
[01:03] TG: nooo thats normal
[01:04] TG: ur not even a little bit dumb
[01:05] CT: D --> I do not feel intelligent
[01:06] TG: u built a robocat for me
[01:06] TG: thats like genius stuff
[01:06] CT: D --> I can't
[01:06] TG: some ppl are just smart abot different stuff
[01:06] CT: D --> Speak to people
[01:06] TG: a lot of ppl cant speak to people, but theyre not dumb theyre just awkward
[01:06] TG: i cant speak to ppl either ;)
[01:06] CT: D --> Oh god
[01:06] TG: just a lil shitty joke to lighten the mood
[01:07] CT: D --> Forgive me
[01:07] TG: it was a joke omg
[01:07] TG: its ok
[01:09] TG: no but seriously i cant?? um wel u know this im p sure but i cant do big crowds unless i plan again and i know im going into a crowd otherwise im a panicked nerd
[01:10] TG: bc i was alone a long time u know?
[01:10] CT: D --> Yes
[01:10] TG: and that doesnt make me stupid
[01:10] TG: and being socially weird odesnt make u stupid either
[01:10] TG: ur rly talented and smart about other stuff so who cares that u cant talk to people sometimes
[01:10] TG: you try anyways thats really admirable
[01:11] CT: D --> I feel that I have
[01:11] CT: D --> Severed so many conne%ions
[01:11] CT: D --> Because of my inability
[01:12] TG: relationships (including friendships) is a two way thing ppl go in and out of each others lives...
[01:12] TG: its just not just u that ends a relationship its the other person too they walk away or dont care enough or die or w/e
[01:12] TG: so im not saying u didnt play a role in losing ppl but they played a role too
[01:12] TG: so u cant blame urself
[01:12] TG: that just happens
[01:13] CT: D --> I want it to happen less
[01:14] CT: D --> I know
[01:14] CT: D --> Logically
[01:14] CT: D --> That not everyone I speak to wishes to harm me
[01:14] CT: D --> But so many things cause me to feel that
[01:14] CT: D --> So many
[01:14] CT: D --> Misinterpreted words
[01:17] TG: do u feel harmed by ppl not getting ur words?
[01:17] CT: D --> Yes
[01:18] TG: :( can u explain a lil to me or give me an example
[01:21] CT: D --> On one occasion
[01:22] CT: D --> God, I cannot phrase this
[01:22] TG: if u cant explain thats fine
[01:22] CT: D --> Once I indicated that I knew someone by their association to Kanaya
[01:22] CT: D --> And they said they had no idea who I was
[01:22] CT: D --> Despite my quirk
[01:23] CT: D --> Despite knowing another Zahhak
[01:23] CT: D --> And I said
[01:23] CT: D --> There are only two of us
[01:23] CT: D --> And they continued to insist that I was a stranger
[01:26] TG: ppl do that a lot for some reason
[01:29] TG: but i guess i get what ur saying
[01:29] CT: D --> At work
[01:30] CT: D --> I am asked what music I listen to, and I reply 'none'
[01:30] CT: D --> And they do not believe me
[01:30] CT: D --> Why would I be dishonest
[01:30] CT: D --> What humor could lay in that
[01:30] TG: sometimes ppl say none bc they cant think of anything maybe u should just say "i dont listen to music"
[01:32] CT: D --> Why can I not think of these things during the situation
[01:32] TG: bc thinking ont he spot sucks
[01:34] CT: D --> I can improvise a repair for any mechanical device on the spot
[01:34] TG: ok i correct myself SOCIALLY thinking on the spot sucks
[01:35] TG: i walk awy from convos like shit i should have said y instead of x all the time
[01:35] CT: D --> I am able to identify the e%act pinched nerve cluster causing any sort of pain by sight
[01:35] TG: whoa thats fucking badass
[01:35] CT: D --> And I am apparently unable to listen to you as you reassure me
[01:35] CT: D --> Ugh
[01:36] TG: i just type fast
[01:38] CT: D --> I'm sorry
[01:38] CT: D --> I spoke with Kanaya about this
[01:38] CT: D --> And I am laying awake in bed
[01:38] TG: howd that go
[01:39] CT: D --> I tried to e%plain
[01:39] CT: D --> I am unsure how well I did
[01:40] TG: did w talking or
[01:40] CT: D --> Yes
[01:40] TG: okay making sure this didnt also have to do w bed
[01:40] CT: D --> That
[01:41] CT: D --> Usually does not cause worry
[01:41] TG: ay casanova
[01:41] TG: but if u want the truth!!! i think ur doing
[01:41] TG: better than u were before
[01:41] TG: ik u say its worse but i mean ive also been gone a year
[01:42] TG: but i see improvement?
[01:42] TG: or maybe were just closer idk but either way u seem more open
[01:44] CT: D --> I know I have made
[01:44] CT: D --> Some progress
[01:45] TG: plenty of progress
[01:46] TG: and u can make more
[01:47] CT: D --> I would not recognize the man I was a sweep ago
[01:50] TG: most ppl feel that way abt past thems
[01:50] TG: hold on a minute tho i gotta eat this ice cream b4 it melts all over me just gimme a minute or two
[01:51] CT: D --> Ok
[01:57] TG: i h8 melty ice cream i wish ice cream stayed creamy but also solid
[01:57] TG: is that weird
[01:57] CT: D --> Not particularly
[01:58] TG: ok sorry for getting idstracted
[02:03] CT: D --> It's fine
[02:07] TG: are u feeling any better
[02:10] CT: D --> Somewhat
[02:11] TG: do u want to maybe practice talking :o
[02:13] TG: that question sounds dumb but i mean like we can work together i can pretend to be a shitty douchebag sometimes or patronizing or w/e and u can work out how to reply and i can give u feedback and we can work on getting u even better or at least work on ur temper?
[02:14] CT: D --> I
[02:14] CT: D --> I think that may prove usefoal
[02:14] CT: D --> Now I wish to try and sleep, however
[02:15] TG: yeah im not rly full on the brain function at 5am either
[02:15] CT: D --> May we pick this up another time
[02:15] TG: we ca pick up tomorrow if u want
[02:15] CT: D --> That is a good idea
[02:15] CT: D --> Thank you, Ro%y
[02:15] TG: np!! :3
[02:16] TG: sweet dreams
[02:16] -- centaursTestimonial [CT] gave up trolling tipsiestGamer [TG] at 02:16 --











