On 'Writing for Yourself'
Phoe rant incoming because I've been seeing this discourse over the last few days, and I have certain...feelings regarding it.
The rundown: Recently on Twitter I've been seeing people lamenting about their fics not getting a lot of traction or engagement, and how it's made them feel like not wanting to continue. Original poster asked for advice on how to deal with it. A lot of people responded with, 'Write for yourself'. I've also seen a lot of pushback against this advice, calling it unhelpful, and that the whole point of writing and publishing fics is to get engagement and interact with the community, etc, etc.
I'm very firmly in the camp of 'write for yourself' (or really, 'create for yourself' since I do a lot of things, not just writing). I mainly write and publish original fiction, but I still feel the advice applies regardless.
Before I explain my position, let me start with what might be a hot take: I feel like a lot of fanfic writers in particular come off as more than a little entitled and attention whore-y, and with the complaints about their work not getting any engagement, it really comes off as them writing largely to get attention and pats on the back. Yeah, of course they love what they're writing, otherwise why write it in the first place, but the fact that their love is so heavily reliant on getting attention and praise says enough.
I've not written fanfiction in like 20 years - the bulk of what I write is original, focusing on my own worlds, my own characters. I published my first fantasy novel in 2021. To date, it's only sold maybe 100 copies and gotten a handful of reviews (good ones, though!). Not the blockbuster some people would hope for, but when I didn't even expect to sell even 10 copies, passing the 100 mark made me insanely happy. I've written and produced stuff since, but compared to fanfiction and compared to people with large followings, my work doesn't get a lot of looks. Does it sting? Oh, yeah. It does. It definitely does. Do I wish I got more interaction? Yeah, of course. Who doesn't? But I write for myself, mostly. Popularity is nice, but it's not expected; I keep expectations pretty low.
But Phoe! Why else would you write and publish something if you didn't want people to see it, engage with it, and tell you how much they loved it? Well... For someone who writes for themselves or creates for themselves, the praise and engagement is incidental - it's secondary. A person who creates for themselves will be writing, drawing, or whatever regardless of whether they get interaction or not. Why share it? Well, if you're proud of something you've done, you're gonna show it off, right? It's proof of its existence. Maybe people love it, maybe people don't. Maybe people don't notice it at all. And that's fine. It's there. It's in the open. It's proof that you've finished something; the idea is no longer just sitting in your head, or sitting hidden away in a cloud drive or a sketchbook somewhere.
You create for yourself to get ideas out of your head. You create for yourself because you really like something and its important to you. You create for yourself to make something that didn't exist real. You're still allowed to be disappointed when people don't react the way you'd like them to, or not getting any traction. But not every idea is a winner. Not everything you do will be beloved. And that's okay. What's important is that you keep going.
But what about being able to engage with the community? Dude. I've actively avoided engaging with most fandom communities for almost 20 years because a lot of fandoms end up being incredibly childish and toxic. Homestuck, RWBY, TADC, Voltron - and that's not even getting into even bigger fandoms like in anime. Fandom interaction is kind of overrated. >_> (except the BSC fandom - they're pretty chill, but it helps that it's a small fandom).
Not saying people are wrong for wanting to engage with fandom communities with fanfic, but if that's your primary reason for writing and the thought of your work flopping demoralizes you from wanting to keep writing...well. Not gonna say you're not a real writer, but I will say that you might be a bit spoiled. The creative world can be harsh, and a lot of times it's going to feel like you're just pouring your heart out into a void. But the reality is, you gotta learn how to take it in stride, move on, and keep making things.
Writing (or anything creative) is an act of love. Receiving love for what you've created is an immense privilege that - even though you have to work hard to earn it - won't be there every single time. And honestly, there's something a tiny bit romantic in making something without expecting it to be loved, only to find out that it is. Yeah, it can motivate you to keep going. But you also need to be able to keep it going for yourself.
