Imagine Alastor going out to talk to Mimzy or Rosie but he forgets to leave a note.
Charlie is looking for Alastor and recruits the others to find him, eventually Vaggie suggests the Bayou.
Charlie did not know there was a Bayou in the Hotel.
It's full of illegally imported Earth plants and animals who crowd Charlie demanding pets like she's a Disney Princess and Lucifer would usually be annoyed but there are Ducks.
There's a split second between when Alastor opens the door to find the entire hotel in his room petting the animals, and that wherein both parties become actively aware of one another. The moment is exquisitely awkward.
Straightening his spine, Alastor tilts his head curiously at the interlopers. "So... I see we're misappropriating our power as manager to conduct room searches now Charlotte? Ah, I must say I'm quite proud of your descent into evil. Today - forcible entry into private property; tomorrow -embezzlement and murder!"
A studio audience applauds as Charlie frantically tries to dispel that idea. Fumbling over the words in her panic to be seen as altruistic in her goals and not, in fact, breaking and entering her hotelier's quarters for no onther reason than she could.
Alastor cuts her off breezily, as if it was no matter at all, as he glances across the assembled. Alighting on his target. Of course he'd intended to seek them out later but... well, he could make this work.
"Ah, and there's the fellow I was co-... hmmm, intending to see feels like a safer turn of phrase..."
"Oh, you can come to see lil old me anytime deer daddy..." the coquettish lilt is ruined by three sets of arms filled to the brim with fluffy animals all seeking pets from the multitasker.
"Charlotte, I have decided to test our guest's claims of lung capacity by holding him under the bayou for five minutes."
"Oooh soooo spoooky bambi, can you tone it down? I'm having a great time with these little guys, oh yes i am youaresocute..." Lucifer coos at the amassed ducks and lings about him.
"I could do it... it'd be pushing my personal best, but I did have to get good cause Val was into underwater based shoots last year and well, you can't say no."
Alastor blinked. "Ah yes, thats why I was seeking you out... Rosie and I went to settle a dispute dear Mimzy started with those Vees, you see, and well..."
Angel was going pale. Val in a bad mood? He could be deadly.
He instinctually snatched the item tossed at him, and recoiled.
"One thing led to another and now I'm afraid two of the vees are holed up in their tower and one of them, as you can see, has been dealt with. You may keep that, all I ask is that whatever vengeance you enact not be shared over the dinner table. Do as you see fit."
"Is this a fucked up prank?" Angel is on the verge of a breakdown. Husk is edging towards him, and the spider can't stop shaking.
"Why no... but I shall think about such an idea in future, there's a few people too complacent these days. I'm not sure which of us dealt the final blow, but I think the joint effort has randomly assorted and assigned sinners to Rosie and myself. We'll get to amending those frankly juvenile mess of contracts later. It looked like a toddler drew up the clauses..."
"...if the cannibal has me, my chain I mean, that mean she's going to ask for like, flesh?" Angel shudders, feeling dread rake its claws down his spine and dig into his guts. Twisting with anxiety.
"Hah, no. No the cannibals prefer to hunt or scavenge unless theres a very specific point to be made to a thrall or townsperson, but Rosie is actually quite fair and balanced in her punishments. The threshhold is high... and the crimes she chooses to dismber for are... not sins you would ever deign to engage in."
"Cool... so, what're you two gonna do with the studio?"
"Force the picture box to cede full control of it to ourselves, rewrite voxtech out of the contracts and deal with some of the more dangerous performers and staff. Then, I suppose there would be a role for a director or supervisor... one who knew the business, who retained some level of empathy for others... who was the antithesis of valentino, to take up the mantle under his overlord." Theres a pause. "Hmmm, poor turn of phrase given your last overlord... you would be the second in command of the venture, and able to make decisions, as husker can for thralls under my control, in my abscence. And if they ever started to become... a problem, their chain would be hauled back into line, as I assume this person would want... not wishing to ever BECOME Valentino."
"Can you... show me who I belong to?"
Thankfully the tone is tearful rather than salacious, and Alastor flicks his wrist to manifest the chain. There's a definite blend of signature dusky rose and green.
"It seems you were one of the few jointly held between us..."
Angel huffs a laugh between grateful sobs of relief. "Hey, I don't normally do chicks off camera -mostly- but I'd be fine to get between y-"
"Refrain, if possible, Angel... it has been quite the long day."
That catches a few peoples flagging attention.
Charlie is looking at Angel like she's going to explode into a shower of confetti, and Husk seems to be waiting for Angel to have some sort of explosive response of his own.
"Actually, kind of looks like Valentino went down without much of a fight, you seem pretty whole." There's an accusation in Vaggies tone that sours Alastor's mood visibly. He noticeably reroutes the emotion to a fake cheerfulness.
"Valentino was all smoke and mirrors, as was his boudoir apparently, and his skills for combat were overrated. Once you remove his guns and tear out his tongue, he really has no power with which to overpower an adversary."
"But he's like 9 feet tall with six arms and Ive seen him throw a car when he's mad! He's pretty fucking strong." Angel protests, feeling his own fear for the moth maligned in the dismissal of the threat he posed.
"Perhaps, but the only reason he held sovereign status was because the other two vees propped him up constantly. On his own, he simply has little tricks and his little consent removing spit nonsense to disorient and overpower. Take access away, and he's little more than a very large piece of meat begging for mercy through a mouthful of blood. Delightful image to ruminate on, by the way."
"What happens when he reforms though? He's not good at giving up his... things."
"He belongs to one or both of Rosie and myself. Shame his biology is riddled with that little drug, he would have been an excellent option to harvest for Rosie's emporium. But, one can't have dazed and amorous cannibals running around, that could get quite disturbing and ruin the town image rather quickly. Still, if she can think of no use for the moth, and after you've sent him through reformation as many times as you feel is fair... I shall simply add him to my broadcast."
"You'd let me kill him?" That seemed to perk Angel right up.
"As many times and ways as you like... though I would be clear that these will not involve anything of a sexual nature. That is rather a hard line with both of us, I'm afraid. Rosie and I could give you a number of alternate options that are far more cathartic... have you ever seen someone explode after having dynamite transported into their stomach? Hilarious."
"No one is killing anyone, even Valentino, at this hotel!" Vaggie and Charlie jump in, automatically. Frustrating a few present with the persistent do-gooder act. As if Vaggie hadnn't beaten seven kinds of hell out of the angry exprcist during extermination day... and now has the gall to ask Angel to NOT get revenge after DECADES under (on top of and in every imaginable position) Valentino whether he liked it or not.
"Of course not, we can do it in Cannibal town. And Charlotte, didn't you also wish to obtain vengeance for the time he was inappropriate to your person?"
You could feel the temperature drop as Lucifer looked at Charlotte. "What. Did. He. Do?"
"Nothing! Nothing I promise. Well, I mean. He maaaay have licked my arm a bit, but I handled that like a pro!"
"Busboy, I also get a turn reducing the moth to dust... he needs to learn that consent is important."
"Well, if you must... we may need a stepstool for you to reach his throat to wring it though, there is Quite the height difference."
"Oh go f-"
"Simmer down, Majesty, he's just kind of like that." Husker shrugs, eyeing Al critically.
And then Angel has moved so fast that even the skittish, fleet footed prey insticts of the deer arent able to let Al flinch back fast enough, before he's being Hugged++ by six arms.
"You creepy beautiful fucking bastard, I can't believe you killed Val and I'm... well, not free-free, but things aren't so shit..."
"Yes, yes... excellent. We can negotiate terms in future, around that matter. Someone as infamous as yourself could do with the threat of retribution from two bloodthirsty overlords hanging over his head as a deterrant to anyone who might seek advantage or revenge now the moth is down. Why, ask Husker what happened to the fools seeking him out for his debts after I took control of his soul!"
Husk seemed to look through the wall for a long moment before he spoke. "You ever seen someone turned inside out and still screaming? Yeah. Don't think I'll ever get over that sight... or the sound. Or the smell."
"Now, if the sentimentality is over with... why are you all in my room?"
"OhmygoshIam soooooo sorry to invade your privacy Al, but you just disappeared and I was worried and we can't just call you so we all came to check your room in case you were sick or something..."
"And then we all found this sneaky little portal of yours and the earth items you have there." Lucifer finished. "Care to explain? I could smite you for breaching the rules of hell."
Alastor laughed. "Little majesty there are no rules in hell. Isn't that the point? Now if you could all kindly leave, I have a broadcast to plan. The playlist needs to be suitably befitting to ensure listener engagement and all that jazz."
"Okay, but can we circle back to the 'needing to leave a note' thing, at the next staff meeting? I qas worried..."
"I'm sure we can come to a compromise, if that is what it takes to ensure ongoing privacy."
Charlie made a high pitched noise that made the windows rattle.
"Now if you would be so kind...?"
Vaggie and Charlie trailed out.
Lucifer was not so subtly hiding multiple ducks and lings in his shirt, coat, hat and wings as he sidled out.
Husker paused at the doorway.
Angel pulled back. "You know, if you ever need... my services, just say something, alright? I dunno how else ta thank you for this and it's kinda what I'm best at."
"Not necessary, my good man, but your appreciation is noted. I understand you are also skilled in shooting, fashion, handicrafts and cooking. I'm sure we can find your niche somewhere if you choose to cease your current line of employ or want a dual role. But that is for another time. Husker? Angel needs a drink, I believe. Perhaps a strong one."
"Yeah, I got him."
The winged cat gently leads the spider from the room, and the door clicks shut behind them both.
Alastor feels his shadow self unwind from about his body, slipping out from under the clothing sluggishly. Not the best plan, but he'd literally had seconds between openin his room and discovering an audience that needed the pitch-perfect performance of an afterlifetime to avoid questions.
His limbs began to tremble. Any longer and the facade would have cracked like dropped porcelain.
He made it to the bedside somehow, and all but fell upon it, biting back a wince as everything was jostled. Injuries from today not-withstanding, the pesky reminder of his defeat by Adam hadn't properly healed despite Rosie's best remedies and handiwork.
What a nuisance...
Alastor finds he's also rather concerned that now his room had been trespassed upon, it opened the door as they say, for further incursions with far less warning or ceremony. His ability to mask it all was going to be an ongoing matter he must manage from now on to avoid raising suspicion.
Niffty dropped in from a ceiling vent and climbed up beside him.
"How bad is it sir?"
"Quite, my dear... quite."
Without a word, the small maid tucked herself into his side and shut her eye. She started to hum, a strange little melody she once said had helped her calm down after her husband had gotten violent.
She always used it if she felt Alastor was keeping his real hurts hidden... she may be difficult to read, but Niffty was sensitive to the energies of the people she chose to care for. Much as Alastor was himself. They were an odd mismatched pair, rounded out by the sharp-eyed curmudgeon of Husker, who was equally as unshakable when he chose to place his affections towards an individual.
"Thank you my dear..." Alastor mumbled, feeling his mind and body being shut down as the innate magicks that kept sinners alive through various losses or reformed them after a death, started to work on the damage.
Niffty didn't say a word as he fell asleep, nor when her apron started to turn red... she simply slipped off the bed and went to find the small chested angel lady who was sort of mean but good in a crisis.
Niffty knew Vaggie would know how to help Sir.
Even if her appearance nearly gave Vaggie a heart attack.
