Ficlet based on my VERY first comic for this au <3
Tw foooor: Gore, vomit, heavy injury, sui ideation.
Steven sat on his large, soft pink bed, skimming though a large book Pinedot had found for his lessons. He'd been learning Gem Glyph and Gem History for a few years now under the direction of Pyrope, but this, this was new. He'd never seen this book before, and within were piles upon piles of Gem traditions. He had learned about some minor traditions before, but this seemed detailed. Important.
Pinedot flipped through the pages, he found himself squinting at some of the letters as she read them off to him. She continued to guide him until he abruptly stopped her on a specific page. His mother was illustrated inside, similarly to her mural. Gems surrounded her, all colored with a vibrant pink hue.
"Devotion ceremony? What's that? I don't think I've seen this before in my history lessons." Steven spoke up, looking to Pinedot for answers.
"Oh, just a ceremony for new Gems. It's nothing big, really, but.." she trailed off, her expression weary. Steven looked to her curiously, sitting up straighter as if to show his interest. Pinedot couldn't help but sigh reluctantly.
"It's a way the Diamonds used to connect with the gems they'd make and unlock their devotion to them using their essence, but when Pink Diamond was 'shattered', it left a lot of new Gems without any real devotion. Many missed out because of her absence, but it's nothing you really need to concern yourself with."
Steven's eyes widened as he listened, his mind raced. Those poor gems going without, he could help! He looked up to Pinedot with genuine sincerity. "Can't I do that?? If they missed out, I'd really want to help them feel connected! It can't be too difficult right? It's just some essence ceremony? Oh c'mon Pine, please? All I'd want is to be able to connect the Gems in my court.." He seemed so bashful about it, but he spoke the truth. His Gems didn't seem to take him very seriously, Pinedot thought. Fleshy and sweet, he looked more like an Off-Colored clown to many. Harsh but true.
He smiled brightly, pleading with his hands clasped together. His mind was set, there was no stopping him now. Pinedot's attempt at a stern expression faltered, she couldn't help but be moved by his enthusiasm.
Pinedot laughed a little, adjusting her visor while smiling at him, "Fine fine. I can try. Say, I can set up while you're asleep, how does that sound?"
Steven beamed at her, reaching in to hug her tightly. "Thank you Pine! I won't let you down, or the Diamonds. I promise."
Pinedot sighed, patting his head reluctantly. She wasn't one for his constant hugs, but she'd let it slide. Just this once.
He was so excited! A party just for his court, all so he could learn and connect with them. The book fell off the bed, the pages blurred as it hit the ground, but Steven didn't care. He was far too happy to be important for once. He could make things right, prove he's a real Diamond in their eyes for sure!
With that, the extra lesson came to a close. Pinedot readied Steven's chambers for sleep, yet, something felt odd to him, like a pit settling deep in his stomach. He knew it'd be something to look forward to, but anxieties filled his head anyways. What if he wasn't good enough? What if nobody showed up?
Curling into his silk sheets, he decided sleeping off his thoughts would do him some justice. He closed his eyes, letting himself fall asleep.
It wasn't long until he fell into a deep slumber, it was almost unnatural. A stinging sensation from his neck seemed to linger even as he slept. Did he always fall asleep this quickly? He couldn't remember
For a moment, it felt as if his consciousness was blurring together. He forced his eyes open and he saw himself being carried away from his bed. His vision was too unfocused to detect where he could be going, or who had him. His eyes fluttered, and his consciousness faded once more.
Suddenly, he felt light. It was as if he could float into the cosmos and away from the horrors he had beseeched here. Separating from his physical half, it was as if he was floating away from Homeworld itself. The stars flew right past him, planets left in the void behind. He knew where he was going, where he was desperately reaching out to.
Earth, so eagerly in his grasp. He held his arms open, as if to embrace the blue-green planet as if it could wash away any worry he could've dreamed of.
Suddenly, a bright white light overcame the small planet, something forced him back harshly.
A sharp pain gripped his chest, his spine felt as if it could break as his astral form slammed violently into his physical body, alerting him to pain that stung all across his limp body. His eyes slowly peeled themselves open in a brutal attempt of clarity. He HAD been moved, taken from his warm bed to some new room covered in flowers. Perhaps a garden? He'd never seen one on Homeworld before.
The texture of cold stone ran down his exposed back, and a warm wet sensation ran down his body. He tried to blink to adjust his vision, looking to his left as the odd blurry blobs around him began to clear.
Gems, yes those are Gems! Surrounding him with absolute jubilation. They never looked happier! Yet, something was wrong. They were covered in something, a thick red ran down their chins as a horrific sound began to plague his ears.
'What was that? Is it...?'
'Chewing?'
'What are they chewing on...?'
Steven's internal monologue was interrupted as he fixed his gaze to himself for answers, where the chewing seemed the loudest. He furrowed his brows as his vision finally cleared up. While slowly lifting his head, the stinging sensation ran down from his neck and into his lower body. Where was this pain coming from? It was unbearable, as if someone was digging inside of him. Finally able to tilt his head to his chest, his eyes widened with absolute terror. More Gems surrounded his body covered in the same red as before, hands sunk into something deep.
In a cruel sense of clarity, he realized. It was him him. The sensation of fingers pulling and digging down into him became very clear. He could feel it.
'Oh my God.'
'They're...'
'They're eating ME!!'
His chest cavity had been split wide open, all the way down to his belly. His skin was pulled back to expose what was underneath. What on Earth was holding his Gem together? It seemed to clasp onto broken tissue as if its life depended on it. He could feel its weight pulling on what was left of his skin.
His large intestine was pulled out to the ground beneath him, it slowly slithered its way to the stone tiles beneath him as a large Quartz came to retrieve it. She tugged it out harshly as others crowded and began to rip it apart with their teeth. Some began to dig underneath his ribs for more, breaking his lower ribcage to grasp his vital organs in a primal sense of greed. The sound of his bones cracking inward could've easily been mistaken for that of a large branch snapping to pieces. He couldn't bear it. He couldn't STAND it.
How on EARTH was he alive? Awake, even?
This made no sense.
'No way no way no WAY.'
Steven couldn't make a sound. The only sound of protest he could make was a faint gurgle of his own spit and blood choking him as the dingy taste of metal overwhelmed him. He tried to move with all his might, the stinging in his neck seemed to echo with every attempt. It was no use, he was paralyzed in place. Probably drugged as he slept.
He couldn't protest.
Couldn't fight it.
Couldn't separate himself from this horror as tears filled his terrified eyes. He closed them tightly, succumbing to the overwhelming pain. The sound of chewing and his own bones breaking under the weight of unsteady hands echoed through his head. Something he'd never forget.
As quickly as it'd started, it was finally over. Homeworld's 'sun' had risen over the garden, shining over the boy's broken body. He was left on the cold slab of stone alone, blood still dripping from his body. Nobody to comfort him. A drape was placed on him in a cruel sense of respect. It did nothing for him, really.
He finally found the strength to sit up, but the moment he did, everything inside of him seemed to regurgitate into his throat. He gagged, blood and small bits of his guts spilling from his mouth slicked with vomit. He felt so sick, his stomach couldn't settle from being pried and pulled around, regenerating over and over. Did he even have a functioning stomach anymore? How was that possible? How was any of this possible? He should be dead, he felt he should be. He wanted to be.
He slowly slumped back to the cold, hard stone table he was placed on, gasping with exhaustion. His throat burned, his eyes were puffy. The garden lit up with the faintest of pink hues as his gem began to hum with power. A nasty, deep scar had healed over the once open wound. It seemed like it was the best his gem could do, marking him with this memory for the rest of his pathetic life. It felt deserved.
He wanted this. He wanted to help.
Pinedot finally emerged, stepping over thick vines that had grown over the blood spilled tiles of the garden. She looked around, calling to Steven until she eventually found him. She seemed unfazed. Complacent, perhaps.
"There you are! Stars, this place is a mess. I didn't realize how many Gems would show up-" Her analysis came to a close as she looked to Steven. He looked terrible, something she didn't expect. She honestly didn't know what she expected. Just not this. She walked to him, leaning into his fixed gaze.
"Steven? Are...are you alright?"
She snapped her touch stubs in front of him, grinning with a confused expression. This is what he wanted, wasn't it? Why did he look that way? She'd done how he asked. She did realize that things seemed very...messy. Her communion wasn't nearly this gross looking. Things began to fall into place for her as her expression dropped.
Steven, of course, didn't respond to her. Stuck in a daze. He couldn't speak if he wanted to, and he didn't want to.
Pinedot sighed. She looked to him worriedly. "I'll...have someone bring you back to your room. How about that? I'll be back."
She began to walk away, but was interrupted by Steven, who grasped her by her limb enhancer. She was pulled to a stop. She turned to him wearily, his expression had curled into genuine fear. He didn't want to be alone, and she knew it so.
She sat on the table near him, reaching to rub his head. "I-I'm sorry. It wasn't supposed to be like that but.."
Steven smacked her enhancer away. Her presence was enough. He wrapped his arms around his head, shielding himself from the sun as he shifted away from her gaze.
She trailed off, guiltily swallowing before continuing.
"You're going to help a LOT of Gems this way. So many." She smiled, she tried to at least. Comforting wasn't her strong suit.
Help. He did this because he just wanted to help. He still did.
His body flooded with energy, overcoming him in a bright pink hue.
It was as if his humanity had slipped away in the blood and guts spilled beneath his feet.
This is what he asked for. He always got what he wanted.
