SOMEONE please write the Neverafter modern au fanfic where Gerard impulsively becomes a foster parent for Pinocchio and Ylfa after he and Elody “take a break” (it’s not a divorce, he insists, it’s temporary) and because of course he let Elody keep the mansion, he’s not going to make her move out he’s not a monster, he now lives in a little suburban house next to the overly indulgent Timothy Goose, his husband, his son Jack, and his incorrigible cat Pib. Soon after his cousin Rosamund turns up on his doorstep not offering any explanation, but her parents don’t seem to be looking for her and Gerard knows a little too much about parents who don’t look for their children, so she lives there too now and is helping out with Gerard’s strange little foster kids. Ft. Gerard sleeping on the couch every night because of course he gave the master bedroom to Rosamund and Ylfa and Pinocchio share a room with a bunk bed; Timothy helping out where he can, most often in the form of giving way too many cookies; Pinocchio dragging Pib everywhere and trying to use the cat as a scapegoat for half the mischief he gets up to (the other half is things Pib actually did but no one believes a cat would be capable of); the weirdly intense social worker Mr. Wolf; Timothy’s coworkers at the local school Scheherazade and Aesop; and Pinocchio’s ever growing collection of stuffed animals including Senator, cricket, Pinocchicrow and Spinocchio
