#plant!bernard

[gotticalavera]

I don't know which scenario would be more fun...

Tim's family and friends find out that their boyfriend has transformed into a plant, so they end up helping Tim take care of the plant!Bernard.

Or... Tim hasn't told them anything and has thrown himself into finding a way to get his boyfriend back; everyone assumed he's going through a breakup and that's why he named the plant Bernard.

[gotticalavera]

Even though Bernard is a plant, he is quite aware of his surroundings, so two things happen...

Discover how devoted and dedicated Tim is to his relationship and how much he cares. He always had that insecurity before the divine punishment happened, not feeling good enough for Tim, but now, he is showing him how much he loves him.

On the other hand, he has too much blackmail material from his other caretakers; no bat or Tim's friend is safe.

[gotticalavera]

Bernard turns into a plant

So Tim becomes an expert in botany so that his boyfriend doesn't wither.

[gotticalavera]

Damian would know about plant!Bernard...

Only for a scene to occur where plant!Bernard gives him vegetarian food and Damian questions whether this is wrong because now his brother-in-law is a plant.

But it's a fleeting thought because plant!Bernard jokes that he has to get rid of the "evidence" because they're going to link them both to murder.

[gotticalavera]

Following this idea...

For some reason, Kon and Bart are in charge of looking after Tim's apartment, but more than anything, of taking care of the plant in the apt while he goes on a trip.

They think Tim's attachment to that plant is a little strange, but they assure him they'll take good care of it. Strange things begin to happen in the apt; breakfast is always served, televisions turn on and off for no reason, they trip over things without any obstacles, leaves are scattered in different places, and the plant... always seems to be in different parts of the apt.

While Bart and Kon are starring in a really bad paranormal slasher movie... Tim feels like he forgot to mention something as he begins his mission to go to Olympus.

[gotticalavera]

In your Bernard Plant AU.. would the fruits Bernard have be his children or something? Grapes can self-pollinate.. so little Bernard plant clones??

They're just grapes...

Or rather, they should be just grapes if it weren't for a certain bird trying to pollinate plant!Bernard, even though it's not a pollinating bird at all.

But the grapes don't actually reach such a developed stage because plant!Bernard is a potted plant and a bit too young to produce a "good harvest." (since grapevines only produce functional fruit in their third year).

However, if they could have a baby grape that way, it would be because all the nutrients ended up concentrated in a grape that grew too large to accommodate a baby inside the fruit.

[gotticalavera]

op just gotta say, I love ur bernardplant au l love seeing it expand

Thank u so much 💖💖💖

And interestingly, the AU originated from this Dungeon Meshi sequence. And also because I like the idea of Bernard growing roots if he gets hurt.

And then I remembered how common it is in Greek mythology to be turned into a plant as a punishment from the gods.

Bernard abused the gifts Dionysus bestowed upon him to bring Tim back to life, and this transformed him into a plant. And since it's a punishment from the gods, it's a bit more difficult for Bernard to regain his body.

And now the question is whether Bernard could have the mercy of a god and restructure the punishment Dionysus gave him (perhaps he becomes a nymph or has to be a plant every so often). Or Tim ends up making a deal with Dionysus himself to pay for Bernard's punishment... And I think I could go that way, because I don't think Dionysus is that involved in the cult that Bernard was in, and he wants a different kind of reward than a sacrificial body.

[gotticalavera]

Sooo do Timbern have freaky plant sex

Emmm, the only thing that comes to mind is for Tim to water plant!Bernard, but it's not water...

Although they could also make a kind of h-tentacle, but with branches and roots (????)

But I don't think it's such a freaky plant sex. And the watering thing makes me think of some mythological events (the Popol Vuh specifically), and that ends up having babies. Timbern having a grape baby?!?!?!!!