I wish it wasn't this big and scary. The world!
I wish i knew what to do and how to do it
I wish I had something interesting to say to others
I wish i wasn't stuck in my head all the fucking time
I wish i wasn't driven to insanity by all the panic/anxiety attacks
I wish I wasn't too weird to be around or not to be able to show it in confidence
I wish i was a real poet. That my writings were wonderful and a piece of art
I wish my drawing style wasn't all about worn and teary eyes.
I wish being alive wasn't defined by the breaths you take in and out
I wish I wasn't such a chaotic entity, lost and filled with misery and worries.
I wish I was able to get out of bed and actually do something with value
I wish i didn't have to expect me to have a nervous breakdown every four days
I wish talking to any human on this earth was an easy task
I wish I didn't have to seek affection and affirmation from others
I wish people could understand the hell of it
I wish i was sane, healthy, bearable, pretty even tho I know somehow it's pointless
I wish school wasn't a torment
I wish I wasn't so scared of people leaving me
I wish I wasn't bothered by all the time i spend alone, feeling terribly lonely
I wish I could just scream this shit out
-Ghost
Hey Ghost! Glad to know you :)
That is some awesome poetry right there! It's full of the feelings very rare people are able to convey through words. You're awesome! I haven't read something like this, something wonderfully haunting and real in such a long time that I can't help but treasure your words Ghost. They intrigue me a lot. Thank you a million times for sharing this. You have no idea how much this helps me. I can't appreciate you enough. You should definitely continue writing this imperfect perfection ;) {if u want to}
Now I know that you've probably heard many advices and you're tired of hearing them again and again but I'd still like to share some words if you dont mind. I just can't let this opportunity (to make someone feel better, even if only a little) go away this easily. You can skip it if you don't need it :) But this is worth trying. You're worth trying ;)
Also, if you feel vulnerable in any way and want me to take this post down, please lemme know Ghost.
The world is both big and small. It's something we're strong enough to go through to reach the afterlife. You're doing you, and that's always the best we all could ever ask for, dear Ghost. You don't have to be interesting for anyone. Believe me you only need yourself and the few people who want to be with the real you. Those who fake it are bad company, okay? Panic/anxiety are something we all face but I understand that you face them more than us and you know what? That makes you so much stronger than all of us and I'm so proud of you for handling it how you are. But we're only human G (short form for Ghost, if you don't mind me calling you that). It's okay to be imperfect in areas others aren't. I can understand your POV. And between you and me? Insanity is way more fun and exciting than simple sanity ;) You're not weird for not being able to show confidence. We're all nervous but some people just hide it better, that doesn't mean that they don't feel the anxiety though. I'm here to listen to your worries anytime whenever it gets hard for you :) You can share your insanity with me. I'm crazy too and I love it. It's way more fun ;) Your drawing rocks G. It's beautiful just how you make it and fuck (sorry for the language) anyone who thinks otherwise. You don't need the negativity. Being alive isn't defined by breathing, I don't think so. I think it's defined by the courage to put one foot in front of another, to keep on going, despite the losses and you're doing that very well if I might add. And G, I'm on my bed all day too. We're definitely a team. You can talk whatever you want here. Spill it all, I won't judge. I only expect you to be at peace and feel better. Yeah, I wish I was pretty too. Let's hope we both aspire to that dream ;) and school? Ugh, that thing's the second name to torture. I'm scared of people leaving too but life taught me something. If they do leave, it might hurt me, sure but I won't lose anything. Ans we're strong enough to take all that life throws at us. Let em go and I know it's easier said than done but this is coming from a person who's been left multiple times and I've learned much throughout the experience. I hope you understand what I'm tryna say. Cuz we don't need someone who can't stay for us. They're only loose ends...in a way I guess. Scream your words here. Write em down. And maybe that makes you feel better :) Oh, and btw you're definitely an awesome poet!
