black stars and white shadows

she/her ll poet/writer ll 'Don't mistake silence for naivety' :)

[wordsareinmysoul]

It still feels baseless.

I feels like I'm useless.

To myself and to others.

Can I ever be better?

2026, July 13th

_MJ

[wordsareinmysoul]

I'm pathetic.

Shouldn't I learn it by now?

Whenever I'm happy, I should always be ready to get an inverse reaction.

Being happy one day equals an automatic downlow the other.

2026, July 9th

[wordsareinmysoul]

Till today, I'd only just heard that you find friendships at the most rare times.

Now, I've experienced it too. And a good one at that.

A last day with unexpected interactions

Rushing breaths and legs to destinations

Packing bags and getting ready

To leave behind the places into memories.

2026, July 7th

_MJ

[wordsareinmysoul]

Maybe I'm not easy to be with. Maybe I really am a bad person. Because they all seem to have someone better. And I always stay behind so I don't feel like the odd one out.

Newsflash: I still am

2026, July 7th

_MJ

[wordsareinmysoul]

Does anybody else feel like a second character in their own life?

The light is always on someone else when you want to shine. And it's not that you're not happy for them but just that you want to know what it feels like to stay the main character too.

Maybe sometime, for a few minutes, I could feel that too.

2026, July 6th

_MJ

[wordsareinmysoul]

The end of those days

And it was all a hallucination.

That maybe I've mattered somewhere

If not completely then partly.

And what do we do

Just to be seen by others.

2026, July 6th

_MJ

[wordsareinmysoul]

It was a weirdly tense feeling.

As if I was forgetting something

As if someone was being left behind

Was it me myself; a past version of me?

Or has it always been the fear of being left behind.

2026, 30th June

_MJ

[thoughtkick]

“Forgive yourself for accepting less than you deserved - but don’t do it again.”

— Unknown

[wordsareinmysoul]

We dont say this enough. But the trauma of not realising you sold yourself short lowkey forces you to do it again and again.

It's important to remember your worth. It's important to know that you deserve way more than you think you do

[wordsareinmysoul]

Has anyone ever witnessed life going at an amazing pace but inside you're still stuck at a certain point?

You don't know if you're forcing the melancholy or if it's really there.

At this point I'm not aware of what I'm projecting inwards and what truly exists.

Even if new chapters are starting I truly feel like I'll be stuck in that mud trap, thinking of myself from only that lowly perspective.

Not letting myself rise from that point in time; a point of disbelieving devastation.

Anyone?

2026, June 29th

_MJ

[wordsareinmysoul]

Why has it all gone to dust?

Do I even want it to revive?

Or is this just a habit

That I'm in hangover of?

2026, June 28th

MJ

[wordsareinmysoul]

I fear it all will begin again

I pray it doesn't

I fear they'll come back

But I pray they never do.

I pray for the best of lives

For those who are wronged

I hope we're wrong about them

I hope there's a breakthrough in the end.

2026, June 22nd

_MJ

[wordsareinmysoul]

@wander-sonder had given these words. Let's give em a try.

Breathing into smoke

With lungs that have drowned

Looking for hearts that spoke

But never to be found

An illusion of a fireplace

A system of locks and keys

The unnatural grace

That's now a normal glee.

We strive for that warmth

Like the one in mother's hugs

Instead, terrors are brought forth

Like childhood's creepy bugs.

So we stand under the rainfall

Waiting for that first ray of sunshine

We hesitate to jump and fall

What if the rain was to be what's mine?

2026, June 20th

_MJ

I'd like to know what you think of this @wander-sonder . Will be waiting :)

[wordsareinmysoul]

What line we crossed exactly? We were friends right?

Leave anon that would be better

Hey Anon, hope you're well.

I can't answer that cuz I'm not sure who you are. Would you mind cluing me in?

And yes anons are definitely better.

Thanks for leaving a message tho :)

[wordsareinmysoul]

The lines we crossed that we pretended were mever there.

We were in the wrong, no matter how hard it's to accept that.

I had no clue you were still active here

[wordsareinmysoul]

Anyone got any requests for a poem?

Give me a prompt and I'll write a poem for you♡

[wordsareinmysoul]

What line we crossed exactly? We were friends right?

Leave anon that would be better

Hey Anon, hope you're well.

I can't answer that cuz I'm not sure who you are. Would you mind cluing me in?

And yes anons are definitely better.

Thanks for leaving a message tho :)

[wordsareinmysoul]

(3)

It's been too dry these days. No special talks, no ordinary gossips. Just the ordinary mundane and the lonely interactions by myself.

I don't know what to think of you atp. Were you a good person or not? Was I good for the fact that I talked so freely with you or am I the culprit too.

I know you hate me by now. It's pathetic how I still care about that sometimes and totally don't think about you at other times. Your image is all blurred in my brain now. Suspicions have made way through the clear water and now it's all murky.

Now I'm not even sure what to think of you. How you were or who you are? It's all so tiring that I just cancel it all out. I just know that I miss the sense of camaraderie and friendship that qe both had, even though it wasn't allowed and even though we crossed lines.

The blurry lines are still the same. I still don't know what you truly think of me or howyou truly are. Cuz again, it was all virtual, not reality. Maybe that's why it's a drug. It's real enough to exist but nonexistent enough to not be seen.

I'm sure you hate me by now so, what's thebloss anyway?

2026, June 14th

_MJ

[wordsareinmysoul]

Hope you’re doing good bro

Thanks, i hope you're well tooo.

Have a nice day!!

I hope you anons come back soon. :)