#poisonpens

[teacakesanddeaththreats]

when u think ur mature but then u realise ur in a group chat called POISON PENIS

[lilacpages]

A Feeling That I Can’t Fight

@mashlumtrash and @lilacpages

Michael Clifford/Ashton Irwin/Calum Hood

Michael and Ashton have an unmistakable allure to them and a routine that dates back centuries. Calum’s just a simple bartender who’s heard a few things about vampires.

Or, Calum lets a stranger with a boyfriend buy him drinks, and eventually all three of them get more than they bargained for.

Chapter One (2.4k) Chapter Two (5.7k)

A teensy bit late but we tried our best considering this wasn’t meant to be a Halloween fic in the first place. But with that being said, Happy Halloween from the both of us !!

[cashtontrash]

i didn’t know that i was starving till i tasted you by irwah on ao3

pairing: Michael Clifford/Ashton Irwin rating: explicit word count: 3934 tags: One Night Stand, AU, Anal Sex, naked cooking, Blow Jobs, Anal Fingering, pass me the holy water plz

'we just had sex and it's the morning after and i woke up to an empty bed and how could i be so stupid of course you left me alone but wait you're in my kitchen cooking me breakfast and i'm so relieved' au

for my @mashlumtrash

[maybe-illfindyouhere]

3. with a pairing of your choice

IDK HOW AUSTRALIAN COLLEGES WORK—

“I’m not jealous,” Michael scoffed, sucking his teeth and clearly trying to give off the air that he was not only telling the truth, but that he, also, believed what he was saying.

“You are,” Luke said, sitting down beside his boyfriend in Michael’s dorm room, sideways on the couch. They were in the common area, a large open space, with two bedrooms leading off of it, but Luke made himself smaller, tucked his knees up between them, resting them on Michael’s thigh. Michael glanced over at him, still acting aloof.

“I’m, like, really not.” Michael said it, his voice betraying him. He would never admit it, not in a million fucking years.

“You’re doing a piss poor job of showing it, then,” Luke said, leaning back a little, resting his elbow on the back cushion. “You know you don’t have anything to be jealous of.”

“I do know that, which is why I’m not jealous.”

“Methinks the lady doth protest too much,” came Ashton’s voice from the hallway outside. Michael looked up at the door, open to the hall, where Ashton appeared, grinning and waving at them.

Thankfully, he kept walking, presumably on his way to class or maybe even the dining hall, but Luke knew the damage was already done. He closed his eyes in defeat and sighed, and he knew Michael’s eyes were on him by the time Luke was ready to look at him again.

“He doesn’t even live on this floor,” Michael said, trying to wriggle away from Luke, but not be mean about it.

“Calum does,” Luke tried, but Michael shook his head.

“He thinks you two are gonna have a thing,” Michael said, frowning at the open door, even though Ashton was long gone. “He thinks just because you have the same major and, like, study together all the time, you’re gonna have a thing.”

“He knows about you, Michael,” Luke insisted, leaning into him again and lifting a hand to comb through Michael’s soft, bleach blonde hair. “It’s not like I keep you a secret. He’s just really friendly, and he wants to make friends. He asks about you all the time.”

At that, Michael seemed slightly appeased. He glanced over at Luke, meeting his eyes for the briefest of moments, then shook his head and looked away. “Then why doesn’t he ever come over and hang out with us?”

“He thinks you hate him,” Luke said.

“But you just said—”

“He asks about you because I’m his friend, but he isn’t an idiot, Mike. And, really, you aren’t subtle,” Luke said, laughing a little, because Michael’s streak of stubbornness was one of the things he liked most about him.

“Well—”

“Maybe we can study here this weekend, instead of the library,” Luke said, snuggling a little further into the couch. “You can sit with us.”

“Oh, how gracious, thank you,” Michael said, though he turned his body a little more toward Luke.

“Do you need me to prove I want you with us?” Luke asked, his front flush against Michael’s arm, now, his lips moving against the shell of Michael’s ear.

“Um,” Michael said, thoughtful, knowing where this was going—except the door was still open and, like, one of his other roommates was in his bedroom and could walk out any second, and Michael wasn’t sure how much of a risk he was willing to take even if Luke was touching his dick.

“Let’s go in your room,” Luke said, nudging Michael, using him to push himself off the couch and cross to the bedroom on the opposite side of the room. Alex leaned back from where he was sitting at his desk chair, in the other bedroom, and wiggled his eyebrows at Michael, just his head visible through the doorframe.

“Shut up, dick,” Michael said to him, smirking, turning to follow Luke into his own bedroom and slamming the door behind him, locking it for good measure as Alex called out “Have fun!” behind them.

Luke was already up on Michael’s bed, lofted above his desk; he was hunched over, because Luke’s height and a bunk bed didn’t really mix, but Michael grinned up at him anyway. He climbed up to sit beside him, ducking his head as well before laying down, pressing himself against the wall. Luke followed his lead, his front tight against Michael’s, their lips meeting as Michael’s hand slipped around to Luke’s back.

“He should be the one who’s jealous,” Luke whispered, his breath tickling Michael’s cheek, and Michael was glad the closeness of their faces probably hid his wide smile and the flush of his cheeks.

[snakeplantz]

um @clingyluke requested #58 (‘I’ve been in love with you my entire life. Ever since the day I first met you’) and Malum. Also we were chatting about soulmate AUs, and so this happened.

~

Calum’s just taken his first sip of Moretti when Michael speaks up. “I can’t be your best man,” he says abruptly. Calum splutters and chokes on his beer.

“Michael, are you kidding?” Calum wheezes. “I’m getting married tomorrow, and you’re telling me I have to do it without a best man?” Okay, well when he puts it like that, Michael feels bad.

“Ashton will do it.” Michael says quickly, taking a sip of his whiskey to avoid Calum’s piercing glare.

“I know he will, but if I’d wanted Ashton to be my best man I would have asked him before I planned a goddamn wedding,” Calum responds, barely concealed anger seeping into his tone.

Michael sighs, and drinks some more. He thinks he’ll need a little liquid courage for this. “I’m not going to be there, Cal.” Michael says, slowly, weighing each word. “This is the last time you’ll be seeing me for a while.”

“Where the fuck are you going that’s more important than your best friend’s bloody wedding?” Calum asks exasperatedly.

“That’s not important.” Michael waves his drink as if to swat away the question. “But- look, I have a bunch of shit to tell you while I still can. Shit that will probably ruin everything, by the way, so prepare yourself.”

Calum sits back in his chair, crossing his arms. “I’m listening.”

It’s now or never, then. “So, I’m kind of in love with you.”

Calum snorts. “Very funny.” There’s a moment of silence, broken when Michael coughs awkwardly. It hits Calum, then, and he gasps, eyes widening to almost comic proportions. “You’re kidding.”

“I wish.” Michael says sheepishly. “I’ve been in love with you my entire life. Ever since the day I first met you,” he admits.

It’s relieving more than anything else, finally telling Calum. He feels lighter, like he’s physically lost the weight of the secret he’s been carrying for far too long.

Calum balks, stunned. “Michael,” he begins, but what can he fucking say?

Michael laughs humourlessly. “There’s more. You’re also… Kind of my soulmate?”

Calum exhales a shaky, broken breath. “I’m your- and you’re not my…” he says, and Michael smiles this watery smile that breaks Calum’s heart.

“Basically.”

“You’re my best friend.” Is what Calum manages, and that hurts Michael more than he could have known it would.

He’s grown used to the pain, honestly, is essentially desensitised to it. He’d spent years watching his soulmate be with countless other people- girls, always fucking girls, and then he’d watched Calum find and fall in love with his soulmate. He hadn’t even cried until now.

He hadn’t cried when the small shy kid who sat by him at lunch made his world split into vibrant colour around him. Or when he realised that Calum could not see the colours that Michael saw, only the monochromatic palette of somebody without a soulmate. Not even when it dawned on him that that meant he’d never be with Calum.

But now: now he’s crying and revealing everything, and it’s all very messy and acutely painful. “We’ve been best friends for twelve years, Calum, and I’ve loved you for all of them. I love you too much to be just your best friend. I love you too much to watch you marry her.” Michael’s voice trembles, but he simply wipes away his tears and carries on, like if he stops for a minute to collect himself he’ll breakdown. He probably will. “And I know this doesn’t change anything. I know- I’ve always known that you could never love me, and I don’t need you to apologise. I just needed you to know before I’m gone.”

Calum touches his hand, eyes filled with tears, but Michael whimpers at the gesture and pulls away before he clings onto Calum’s hand and never lets go. “I’m so sorry, Mike.” Calum says, voice raw and filled with sympathy. Michael feels like he’s being stabbed through the heart.

Michael scoffs, though it’s obvious to both of them that he’s trying to mask the fact his heart is shattering in his chest. “She’s your soulmate, of course you have to be with her. I just thought you should know that you’re mine.”

Calum’s crying properly now, not just tearing up. Twelve fucking years, God- how did he never realise? “I… I don’t know what to say,” he sobs.

“It’s okay, Calum.” Michael soothes, as the sobs wrack Calum’s body. “I’m not asking you to choose me- you don’t have to love me back.” Michael stares at him with big, honest green eyes. “It’s just. You know, you’ve been my soulmate for a while. I’ve been seeing colour for a really long time, Cal, and I’ve always known that your eyes are a deep, rich brown like the black coffee you drink in the mornings. I’ve always known that your skin is caramel and stained with jet black ink, and I’ve always known that your lips are pink and plush and that I want to feel them against mine. I’ve always known that I never will.”

Michael picks up his drink with shaky hands, letting the burn of the whiskey in his throat bring him back from his emotional rant. “Telling you is selfish. I’m sorry,” Michael says, frowning. “it’s not fair for me to put this on you, but I mean- it’s not fair for me to watch you and her live the life that wewould be living if I was your soulmate too.”

Calum is almost hysterical with disbelief. “You’re not selfish- God, don’t ever say that again, Mikey. You’ve been through so much, and you’ve never told anybody.”

Michael disagrees. “Telling you this now, the night before your wedding and the night before I leave: that’s selfish.”

That brings Calum back to a very sobering point, actually. “You can’t- Michael, you can’t leave,” he protests. “I don’t want to lose you, you’re my best friend. I fucking love you!”

Michael sighs. “Not like I love you, though. And that’s okay. It’s okay, but I can’t stick around to watch you love her.” Michael inhales deeply, biting the bullet again. “I’m moving to England, Calum. My flight is tomorrow morning. I can’t be around you, knowing that you’re not mine, and you’re everywhere I fucking look in this city.”

Calum shakes his head vehemently. “You can’t leave,” he pleads, but Michael’s not so masochistic he’d put Calum first again.

“You can’t ask me to stay! If you cared about me at all, you’d let me move on.” Michael yells frustratedly, tears still streaming down his face.

“I love you, Mike.” Calum says softly, reaching for Michael’s hand. “I don’t want you to leave me. Please, please don’t go.”

Michael smiles sadly, slotting his fingers into Calum’s. It feels perfect, honestly, like his hand was made to fit there and it would be far too easy to get lost in that. Michael’s not an idiot, though. He knows that this means far more for him than it ever could for Calum. “If there’s anything I’ve learnt, it’s that hardly anybody gets what they want.” He unlaces their fingers, downs the rest of his drink, and gets up. “Take care, Calum. I hope she treats you well.”

[maybe-illfindyouhere]

9 with mashton :)

I literally have no idea where this came from but hey cool—“Don’t ask me that,” Michael said, shaking his head at Ashton at the very thought of what he’d just been asked.

“I really think it’s worth considering,” Ashton said, fighting to keep his voice level. He had to, since Michael clearly wasn’t in any kind of mood to.

“You want to consider taking a break?” Michael retorted, spitting out the words at Ashton, turning bodily away from him so he didn’t have to see his face.

“I think it would be easier. Don’t you?” Ashton asked, frowning, shaking his head, because the only thing he hated more than someone answering one of his questions with a question, was when he did it to someone else.

Michael didn’t answer for a long moment, which said to Ashton that he was right, that Michael understood where he was coming from, and he was going to agree, even though it had taken a long time to get to that point.

“I think maybe you need to rethink this,” Michael said, his tone accusatory. “All you care about anymore is—” he trailed off, huffing a completely unamused laugh.

“I haven’t even seen her in years,” Ashton said, “this was just as—as crazy to me as it was to you, I didn’t—”

“So you haven’t seen her in years, and yet you’re still ready to just drop everything for her? What about me? The one who’s been with you since she just up and fucking left?” Michael asked, his words venomous, seeping under Ashton’s skin and spreading. It’s true—Michael was the one to pick up the pieces. He’d been Ashton’s best friend for years, and then that friendship blossomed into something else, something great, something better than Ashton had ever had with her. But now…

“I can’t just…not help, Michael,” Ashton said, sucking on the inside of his cheek; a nervous habit.

“How do you know the kid’s even yours?” Michael asked, something he’d been wondering since Ashton told Michael his ex had come back to town, a little honey-blonde girl in tow, with bright hazel eyes, and those goddamn dimples.

“I—I don’t,” Ashton admitted, and really, he didn’t. It was just—he knew what it was like to grow up without a dad. He couldn’t do that to another kid, even if she wasn’t his biological daughter.

“I just…I’m so…so mad that you’re,” Michael paused, taking a breath. “That you’re willing to do this without me. You broke up with her for a reason. You can raise the kid with her without being with her. And just keep being with me.”

Ashton sighed heavily, shaking his head, running a hand through his hair. He closed his eyes, and when he opened them again, Michael was looking right back at him, his green eyes boring right into Ashton’s, and he felt his heart shatter, just a little, his breath catch in his lungs. He opened his mouth and he swore to fucking god he could see Michael flinch, already anticipating what Ashton was probably about to say, knowing that he’d be broken up with all because Ashton’s ex-girlfriend had returned with what was probably his child.

“You’re right” is what Ashton said instead, and Michael’s expression changed from positively distraught to slightly confused with a dash of hopeful.

“What?” Michael asked, clipped, not really wanting to believe until Ashton just fucking said it.

“You’re right,” Ashton repeated. “I was…it was stupid to think that getting back with her would fix anything. And, just…I don’t want to do it alone, just me and her. I’d want you with me, too.”

Michael exhaled a little, one corner of his mouth quirking up into a smile. “All right,” he said, after a moment, sliding across their couch, reaching out one hand to take Ashton’s, resting them both on his knee. “Ok. So when do I get to meet her?”

[lilacpages]

CALLING ALL WRITERS !!!

Do you ship the members of 5sos together? Do you have a shrine to ao3 in your closet? DO YOU WRITE WITH A POISON PEN ??? If you answered yes to each of these questions, you’ve come to the “write” place (haha see what I did there?) 

Introducing the Poison Pens !! A network exclusively for 5sos fic writers! Specifically those of you who write about 5sos being gay af and who use ao3 for all their fic goodness !

RULES:

Must be following me and Jess 

Fill out this form

Must be 18+ (we’re gonna be talking about hella gay smut), but feel free to apply if you’re under 18, we might make an exception 

Must have an ao3 account with at least one posted work 

Must have iMessage (that’s where the chat will be)

Like or reblog this post 

BENEFITS:

A writing squad !!! New writer friends !!!!

Other writers to scream with about ships, headcanons, fics, AUs, writing woes and just general 5sos foolery 

People to encourage/inspire you, help you plan your fics, beat your writer’s block, beta your fics, etc.

People to support your writing (comment/kudos/bookmark on ao3, reblog links on tumblr, etc.)

People to reblog your selfies, edits, gifs, etc. and anything else you make

Just a bunch of awesome peeps who understand the pain of writing and who’ll be there to support you no matter what 

THINGS TO KNOW:

It doesn’t matter if you write 1k fics or 100k fics, all writers are welcome !!

It also doesn’t matter if you ship the boys romantically or platonically or both, or if you’re a multi-shipper (like both Jess and I)

Including myself and Jess, there will be a total of 12 people, so we’re choosing 10 more

We will be choosing 2 muke shippers, 2 lashton shippers, 2 mashton shippers, 2 cake shippers, 1 malum shipper and 1 cashton shipper (I already ship malum and Jess already ships cashton, that’s why we’re only looking for one more person) 

We’ll be choosing sometime in the third week of August, but nothing is set in stone (please have your inbox/messages open if you apply so we can contact you if you’re chosen)

The tag for the network is #poisonpens, and that’s what we’ll be using once this thing gets off the ground (you can also use it to tag us in stuff before we choose if you want)

If this gets no notes, it never happened, also we’ll cry

GOOD LUCK EVERYONE !!!

UPDATES !!!

Changes to the rules:

If you write but haven’t posted anything yet (and are planning on doing so) and still want to apply, you can send us a sample of your writing and we’ll still consider you for the network !! 

Some things I forgot to mention bc im dum:

We’re writers too (duh) and you should be able to check us out since we’re going to be checking you out, so here is my ao3 and here is Jess’ ao3 !!

If you have any questions/comments/concerns you can ask me or Jess, we’ll be happy to help !

[nwxxx]

Thanks everyone for being nice to me, it means a lot