#poly!tedschlatt x reader

[kotiaz]

DILF TED & SCHLATT!!!!!! DROP A FISHING VIDEO AND MY LIFE IS YOURS!!!!!

p.s. send me some dilf!ted dilf!schlatt if you have any

[smallish-t]

Showing you off part 2

Mdni this is filth

CW: slight spitting, degrading, exhibition, breeding if you squint, edging if you really squint

Ted sat in his car outside of yours and schlatts house. He was unbelievably nervous, last night he got his weekly FaceTime call from schlatt showing him how amazing you look being split in half. Hes been getting so many photos and videos of how amazing you look he just needs to see you in person, and last night when schlatt made the comment of him possibly coming over he just couldn't get it out of his head.

Now he's here. Sitting in his car. About to shit bricks.

He should have said he was coming over but he acted on impulse, trying to relieve himself with the many pictures he has been sent but it just wasn't enough any more. Just as he opened his phone again to gather some courage to go in he gets a video from schlatt. You on your knees getting absolutely face fucked, spit all over your face and then schlatt adding more spit right before the video cuts off.

Schlatt: doesnt she look like a good little slut with her face covered in spit?

Thats what he needed, after looking at that video he needed to see your face covered in person. He gets out of his car and knocks on the door without thinking.

No one answers. So before he over thinks it he pulls out his keys, unlocks the door, and walks right in.

Immediately his ears are filled with wet sounds coming from the bedroom.

"Ted is that you? You finally got the courage to come in after sitting in your car for 15 minutes??"

Ted just silently walks in to room and see you there, on your knees, chocking on his best friends dick. He has to squeeze the buldge in his pants for some sort of relief. He doesn't think he ever been this fucking hard, his head is spinning.

"Take a seat, enjoy the show"

Ted takes a seat on the bed just completely awestruck at how you look. He hears you let out a little whimper and that's got his hands moving to his zipper, pulling out his dick and giving it a quick little squeeze. He looks to you, then schlatt with question to make sure this is okay, and instead of giving a response schlatt slams his dick farther down your throat. He makes a rythum and Ted follows it closely, occasionally stopping to hold him self back cause fuck this is too good. He couldn't even comprehend how gorgeous you look in person. Suddenly schlatt pulls you off his dick and you gasp for air, Ted groans at the sight of you already fucked out by just sucking schlatts dick.

"Look at you, you really know how to give a show for our friend here"

He picks you up and put you on the bed right next to Ted. From here he can see your tits more clearly and has to stop himself from touching you. Schlatt pushes you down on your back and spreads your legs. "Look at how wet she is man, maybe next time I'll let you have a taste." Ted gets up to look at your glistening pussy, fuck he can cum at just that alone and has to force himself to sit back down and just watch.

Schlatt slides to fingers into you and it makes a delicious wet sound, mixed with your moan that has him forcing his hand away to stop him self from Cumming. Schlatt picks up a ruthless pace and once Ted calms down a bit, follows his pace again. You are now a mess of moans, squirming around with your eyes closed. "Look at Ted darlin, show him how good you look when you cum on my fingers." Ted's eyes immediately meets your just as you come undone from schlatts fingers alone, and again Ted is groaning. "Don't cum yet, the shows not over." Ted never thought hearing his best friend say something like that would be so hot, let alone he would obey a command like that. Ted moves his hands away and just stares at the sight.

Schlatt moves up in between you legs, sucking his fingers clean as he does. Schlatt groans out, "fuck you taste so sweet." He adjusts himself and lines up to your entrance. "Come here look at her stretch up close it's mind blowing". Ted leans over and watches as schlatt slowly slides in, and that stretch looks amazing. It must feel amazing too cause as he slide in your hand fly's to Ted's arm holding on for dear life. After a few warm up strokes, schlatt sets a pace. This one more slow and sensual. So Ted follows only lightly stroking his dick with the arm you are not currently holding onto.

Then Ted sees the gentleness break in schlatt and he's slowly getting rougher, and faster and soon it's all Ted can do to keep up.

He already know you have have came at least twice now as each time you squeeze the fuck out of his arm.

"Gonna take all my cum darlin'. Take it like a good girl for me and Ted"

Fuck Ted almost came at his words, but he resists and keeps schlatts ruthless pace. Soon he hears schlatt and you moan mixed with you squeezing his arm, Ted cums all over his stomach.

He's out of breath looking back and forth between the two of you but when schlatt starts to slowly pull out he looks over at your wet cunt. When schlatt pops out of you he sees a white pool start to slowly come out. Having no idea where the confidence comes from he asks "may I?" Schlatt just nods with a big grin on his face so Ted reaches over, dips two fingers in the small pool coming out of you and slowly moves it back where it should be deep inside you. He groans and the feeling of your walls clenching around him, and the slight whimper coming from you makes him want to do more but he stops himself as he was only given permission for this. He slides his fingers out and pops them in his mouth and he's eyes roll back as he groans from the taste of both of you, when he take them out he sees schlatt looking at him with hooded eyes before he looks away. "I'm gonna go clean you guys up, Ted we are doing this again."

[schlut]

schloctober: established relationship

2nd person pov; sfw; poly ted x schlatt x gender neutral/implied reader; no beta we die like men;

warnings: briefly talks about social anxiety and panic attack

a/n: in the same au of dating ted / schlatt

ted x schlatt x reader headcanons

at the beginning, schlatt's energies clashed with ted's, there were fights between them that left one angry and the other offended

fights without winners, that left people more hurt rather than more compassionate

you had to communicate and learn together each others boundaries, how much you can push without hurting, when to talk and when to listen

schlatt had to unlearn to jump and hit the person behind him the firsts times physical contact was initiated

he's comfortable when there's nobody looking at him, he tries to be more open with his emotions behind closed doors

he works on learning how to ask for help when he needs it, he learns how to be vulnerable

if ted make himself known and doesn't startle him, he can coax him into cuddling

schlatt won't never admit it but he enjoys using ted like a stuffed animal

and ted thrives in being a giant body pillow

but if you're in public, ted knows to seek you out instead of schlatt when he needs affection

he hugs you quietly, burying his face in your neck and wrapping himself around you

both you and ted had to learn how to recognize and soothe schlatt's anxieties

especially when all of you go to outside

at any sort of gathering ted wants to stay longer and talk to everyone he knows, he's the more extrovert of the group

meanwhile schlatt has only a few hours before his social battery runs out

most of the times he just leaves early, sneaking back home to cuddle with the cats

under all of his careless exterior he feels guilty, he doesn't want cut short your time together but he doesn't want to end up with a bad mood and ruin your night either

one time he forces himself to stay longer than usual

his smile becomes tired, his hands fidgeting and his eyes shifting around, from person to person, quickly

wary, cautious, alert. paranoid.

there's a tightness in his chest, his breath is short, he's holding on but he'll snap soon

you realize that he's a step away from having a panic attack

you hiss at ted to discreetly come help you, hoping he'll understands without asking questions and inadvertently draw schlatt under a huge spotlight

you're afraid to put even more pressure on him, spiraling him more, adraid to not being able to help and inadvertently bring more harm

when ted briefly looks at you confused before being distracted into a heated conversation, you want yell at him in front of everyone

your overworking mind imagines the him insisting on staying, not understanding what's happening while schlatt is shrinking himself to seem small

you decide to take schlatt away and back home, you cuddle and reassure him with soft praises while he cries in your arms, letting out every emotions he suppressed at the party

when ted comes back home hours later, he hides his worry with an annoyed and bitter remark ready on his lips

he stops as soon as he notices schlatt resting on your chest, wet patches on your t-shirt and tear marks running down his cheeks

you're angry at ted even if underneath, you know it doesn't make sense to be

he looks back at you, his face surprised and troubled

and you talk quietly while schlatt is snoring, looking both adorable and grumpy in his sleep

you're sort of a buffer between ted and schlatt, you can recognize when ted being too clingy and schlatt needs space, when ted needs to show off and schlatt needs to hide, when one needs to hug and the other needs to be hugged

even if everyone is constantly busy, you try to take the time to spend moments with each other

quiet and peaceful moments that smell like home

laying in bed together while mindlessly scrolling or answering emails on the phone, comfortable in each other's presence

[smallish-t]

PART THREE WHEN??? IM FERAL ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

I'M FERAL TOOOOOO

Part 3 at some point not entirely sure where I wanna go with it. If y'all got ideas I'm all ears!

[memento-rory]

watching challengers with poly!ted and schlatt and just being like “that’s us!” thru out the entire movie ( not a request just a cute thought )

-🫐

LMAOOOO YES i can just see schlatt leaning back against the couch and looking over at you and ted as the scene where the three of them make out comes up and he’s just like, “yeah, that’s definitely us.” LMAO

[memento-rory]

poly!tedschlatt x reader is so sunshine x grumpy x sunshine fr (i know you know who is who)

[memento-rory]

Okay I’m finally getting the courage to ask this. I’ve been reading your work for awhile and I’ve really been enjoying poly!ted and schlatt. Anyways my question is do you think Ted and schlatt would be affectionate with each other as well or would all their attention go to reader?

omg you don’t ever need to get courage to ask me anything, i don’t bite, i swear! you can always voice your thoughts and questions here!

i’m glad you asked actually, because i’ve been swirling this exact question around in my head as i try to figure out how to write poly!tedschlatt and honestly i can see them being affectionate together but in, like, a queerplatonic way? where there’s obviously an emotional connection that runs a little deeper than friendship but they’re not Quite romantic? i can see them sharing a kiss here and there but don’t know that i can really see them pursuing anything deeper than that, if that makes any sense.

[memento-rory]

Okay bitch🖤 then tell us about the birth of poly schlatt/ted

GLADLY ‼️

you all went to a party earlier that night, coming back to your place to stay the night since it was the closest. it’s not the first time you’ve all congregated at your place.

you’re all on the couch, with your feet in ted’s lap, your back resting up against schlatt’s side, and the three of you are sufficiently drunk. some movie is playing on the tv, something you just turned on so it wouldn’t be so quiet, but you’re not really paying attention to it. you’re hyperaware of each spot on your body that touches either of the boys. ted’s running his hand back and forth on your shin lazily, while schlatt has an arm over your shoulder and basically pets your head. both of them are being very touchy — and sure, you’re also a little cuddly because you’re drunk and very comfortable with both ted and schlatt. you’ve been close for a while — but this is a new kind of touchy. it’s casual, natural even, like this is an everyday occurrence.

you think about the drinking game you all played earlier that evening — one of those card games with all kinds of damning questions and commands — and a moment sticks out to you.

“finish your drink if you have or have ever had feelings for someone in the room.”

schlatt chugged his drink with no hesitation. ted followed shortly after. if they could be honest, so could you. you downed your own drink, avoiding eye contact with both of them. it would have been bad enough to have feelings for one of them, but you had feelings for both of them.

curiosity gets the better of you as you recall the memory. you open your mouth to start to ask them about it, but ted interrupts you unknowingly.

“you guys know that game we played earlier? the card game?”

both you and schlatt perk up, and if you noticed that he also perked up, he definitely noticed you did. both of you avoid looking at each other.

“what about it?” schlatt asks, his body a little tense behind your back.

“i saw both of you drink,” ted’s eyes sparkle mischievously, “you gotta tell me what that’s about. who is it?”

schlatt makes a motion of zipping his lips. you could very easily do the same, or lie. there were so many people at that party, it would be so easy to just pick a random name and say it, but the alcohol that still courses through your veins has you feeling brave.

“you,” you tell ted, your voice a little hesitant. (you’re not feeling that brave.) ted’s eyebrows shoot up, and schlatt stiffens just a little. you turn your head, looking at him over your shoulder. “and you, too, schlatt.”

“you’re fuckin’ kidding.” schlatt huffs a laugh, but he’s not smiling.

“(y/n), are you serious?” ted asks.

suddenly you do not feel as brave anymore. your skin grows hot as both men stare at you incredulously.

“oh, fuck, i shouldn’t have said that, i’m so sor—“

“no, (y/n), i’m glad you did!” ted immediately starts to do damage control as he watches you start to panic, “we’re just surprised you feel the same way.”

schlatt’s arm falls over your shoulder again, his hand reaching up to pinch your cheek affectionately. “we’ve had the hots for you for fuckin’ ever. we’ve just been tryin’ t’ find the right time t’ tell ya.”

“you’re not just saying this because you’re drunk, are you?” you ask, unable to wrap your head around the idea of both of them conspiring to date you, together.

“i mean it helps,” ted chuckles, shrugging slightly. “but no. are you?”

you shake your head.

“would you be into the idea of being with both of us, toots?” schlatt asks, petting your head again.

you nod fervently. “are you guys sure you don’t mind sharing me?”

“you kiddin’? we’ve been plannin’ this scheme for months.” schlatt grins deviously. “and i like the guy enough to play nice.” he winks at ted, who rolls his eyes, but you notice the way his cheeks go pink.

“okay,” you smile, “then i’m all in.”

“thank fuck.” schlatt sighs in relief, bringing his hand up to rest under your chin, turning your face toward his. he kisses you, soft and slow, like he’s savoring it. (he did say he’s been wanting to be with you for a while.)

when you finally pull away from schlatt, you turn to face ted, who had scooted closer to the two of you while waiting patiently for his turn with you. he leans forward, resting one hand on your leg, using the other to cup your cheek. he kisses you the same way schlatt does, and despite this, it feels so different. both of them are just so very them.

it’s the perfect balance.