Why did you write this Ittsy?
Recently, tumblr user Popokki wrote then circulated an inflammatory document with the intention that only specific people were able to view it. Somehow, it made its way to me, an uninvolved party, I was so shocked and disgusted that I decided to do something about it. Due to this document’s content, it is very clear why Ittsy would want few people to see it. However, since this document ultimately tells any and all readers more about Popokki than anything, I thought it prudent to share. So without further ado:
This document is 27 pages long and it is violently inappropriate. This is being placed in a publically accessible format for the benefit of the social analysis of the affected community, but additionally because it is a frank display of the character of the woman who took the time to write it.
The aforementioned document is displayed below, text format only, the full document is accessible by link below the title and includes screenshots of private discussion between the affected parties.
The parties mentioned in the document are as follows:
@kashiings (Muhu) , @catastrophicur (Lex) ,@hhemera (Sy), @Serialten (Ittsy/Popokki) @waywardtsvetok (Cami)
Ethical issues within the document:
1. The author socially shares intimate family details of the affected party. Including but not limited to: an unverified socially circulated accusation towards the party’s brother, socially shared screencaps of intimate conversations and documentable proof of financial coercion.
2. While the document is intended to provide villification evidance towards the affected party it actually showcases repeated cases of purposeful gaslighting and emotional manipulation by the author towards multiple people within the document.
The pattern of the affected party asking if their behavior is permissible, the author enthusiastically assuring them that it is, then framing the affected party’s actions as if the request for consent was not levied and accepted.
Deliberate withholding of information that would allow the affected party to make informed decisions. Then, reacting to their uninformed behaviour as if they should be behaving as they would had they been informed.
Emotional manipulation for the sole purposes of maintaining a commodity (work created) and additionally, for self-satisfaction regarding the author’s emotional needs: To be in a position of philanthropy within all relationships within the document--not only with the affected party.
These individual circumstances will be marked within the text document below for easy consumption.
Controverting Consent will be in italics.
Deliberate withholding of information will be in bold.
Emotional manipulation will be in bold and italics
Victim Complex (feelings of being attacked without external influence; diversion from unethical actions with unrelated rationalizations) will be underlined*
This showcases a troubling pattern in regards to the way the author positions themselves within intracommunity relationships. While I personally find their actions repulsive, its not because I have any personal stock in anything relating to any of these people. But more because these are troubling behaviours overall and require self-reflection on the part of the author. The most disturbing aspect of this is the tone, which suggests victimhood within this situation. Now, I dislike labeling people as abusive so this is absolutely not designed to do such. However, I do think its important that the author of this document take some time to re-evaluate the way they treat others.
I would like the author to genuinely consider whether it was right to tell someone they would support them, but not ever truly intend to. Whether it is right to publically expose other people’s emotional vulnerability. Whether it is right to convince someone of something for long enough to protect your assets--and whether assets are worth hurting others. I want the author to genuinely consider why they feel the need to socially be perceived as emotionally philanthropic if that work tires them? Whether the anxiety of letting those she promises care to ultimately outweighs the anxiety of telling them she can no longer provide it.
But most of all, I would like the author to look at themselves and look at what happened and instead of focusing on how they feel, to just resolutely decide to never replicate it with anyone else ever again. I don't think anyone involved with this can go back from here and salvage what was.
But we can all learn from this situation and use it to become better adults and ultimately, better people.
Tagging potential interested parties: @tigerborne , @shiicn @knifebound @solcorleonis @pseudogaiety, @tobringforth, @stckhlmr,@fluera, @rationalclover @exorcisthmus, @hhemeraa, @svagefaith, @hyperdetect
