Hey y’all! I feel like many of you that follow this account are likely those who are preparing for y’alls first years at Brown as an undergrad! Adjusting to college life is hard, and even though at Brown, you will have peer mentors called Meikejohns who will be there for many of your academic questions as well as some general questions, there’s always unwritten, unasked, and therefore unanswered questions that I feel would probably have been helpful in adjusting! So here’s a list of “tips” for y’all!
You don’t have to/can’t be friends with everyone. You can, of course, be friendly, and be amicable amongst people, but you don’t have to be up close and personal with everyone you encounter. You’ll notice that everyone will try to be friends with each other, because everyone’s scared - everyone wants someone, wants a group, wants to belong. You might find these people immediately, and you might not find these people until a couple years into college. You might find people that work for the first month, and find people who work better in the later months.
If you want to be friends with someone, just go for it. Life’s too short to be worrying about how it’ll look. If you think someone’s cool, just ask to meet up with them or just talk to them. Most people appreciate being asked to grab a meal or something once in a while with someone new.
Leave your dorm room. Please. There is life outside. There is much to explore; much of Brown, much of Providence, and it’s worth spending a couple hours just to walk around.
You can’t do everything, and you don’t have to do everything. You are no Atlas. You do not hold up the world upon your shoulders alone. There will undoubtedly be things you feel like you should be doing, whether it be classes or extracurriculars, but I promise you that you don’t have to be spreading yourself so thin. In fact, it’s probably better if you do a couple things and pour your soul into it instead of like ten and barely dedicate time to each thing, both for your own sake and the sake of the organization. You don’t have to prove yourself to everyone.
Sleep. If you can. Please get some sleep. Caffeine addiction isn’t healthy. Pulling all-nighters is not healthy or cute. It’s not to say you might never stay up really late doing some assignments or finishing a project, but if you’re consistently pulling all-nighters throughout the semester, you might want to reconsider your responsibilities...
It’s okay to take alone time. One thing I really wish I did was just sit and do “nothing” by myself. By nothing, I mean like putting the phone down and closing all my school-related tabs and doing something unrelated, such as reading a book for pleasure (yes, this still exists), drawing some random shit, or jamming out by yourself on that abandoned instrument. Not because I hate people, or not because I wanted to isolate myself, but because I just needed to recharge. It’s healthy to do nothing. Especially in ~college~ we feel like we need to be constantly doing something, but your mental health is of utmost importance, and taking a couple hours for yourself is important. I don’t mean procrastinate, but rather, I mean setting aside a couple of hours, even plugging it into your Google Calendar.
EAT!!! Some of y’all might be the type of people who, once they really get into something, will just go at it without noticing the time go by. But this is dangerous, especially when you keep forgetting to eat. You may also not be eating because you “don’t have time” and you “need to be working.” This isn’t healthy. Your body needs food. You cannot function without it. I guarantee you that eating and resting for an hour in the midst of your work will make the next couple hours significantly more productive than if you had just pushed through without food. You need fuel to power through, so give your body what it needs (actual food! Don’t replace meals with granola bars or shitty snacks, please look for something with nutrients!
Go see Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) if you are struggling in any way mentally/emotionally. It’s really helpful to go see someone about something that might be on your mind, whether it be stress about something specific, anxiety, depression, traumas, etc. They have people for you. If you ask them for help, they will do their best for you. The initial phone call is very very easy, and if that does intimidate you, you can also walk into the place (5th floor, Page-Robinson Hall), and they also have walk-in appointments during the first couple weeks of school.
It’s okay not to be okay. First year of college can be really tough, and it’s okay if you find yourself struggling. It might not turn out to be the glory filled year you thought it was going to be. You’ll learn things about yourself you didn’t know before. You’ll learn things about other people you never thought you were going to learn. I wish upon you no struggles, but struggles can help you become stronger and more mature. There will be love all around you, and people who care about you. They will help you grow as a person.
That’s all I got for you right now. Brown’s a wonderful place, full of wonderful people, and I’m so so so excited for all of you to experience it. There is a year of adventure ahead of you, so go out there and find it. I hope some of what I said will give you solace in some moment, maybe help you feel a little better about some situations.
~ Myers
