Officer: So let me get this straight. You two were fighting on the streets because of a…fan war?
Clark: He started it! He was tearing down all my ‘Batman is the #1 Superhero’ banners! As the president of the official Batman fanclub, I had to do something!
Bruce: Your hero is a miserable weirdo who skulks around in caves like a rabid flying rat. How can someone like that be the #1 Superhero? Obviously, it should be a good role model like Superman. Besides, you protested against the final round of the annual popularity poll and tried to get our votes invalidated, didn’t you? This is payback.
Clark: Because it’s rigged! Batman was clearly leading the poll until a million votes for Superman appeared out of nowhere. I bet you bought those votes, you rich crook! And don’t call Batman a weirdo, he’s just misunderstood! He’s a hundred times braver than Superman!
Officer: Listen, gentlemen, can't we resolve this peacefully? After all, these two superheroes are on the same team – the Justice League. You should be showing support for both of them!
Bruce: You’re delusional. The Superman fan events were a massive success nationwide, clearly demonstrating his popularity. Where's your evidence that I was buying votes, Mr Investigative Journalist? Even you can't deny it: Superman, the visual king, inspires the masses more than that ugly, sad excuse of a gargoyle you call a hero.
Clark: Ugly?! [holds up a life size standee of Batman] You call someone with this chiseled jawline and these sculpted pecs ugly?
Bruce: [punches a hole through the standee]
Clark: Ahh! How dare you hit Batman! [lunges at Bruce]
Officer: Hey! Hey! Calm down!