i think the reason why 90% of my stress regarding school/graduation has blown away is because im starting to apply more significant meaning to things that iv ignored for a long time and that gave me the autonomy to balance what i want with what i need and not feel guilty about it. coming back from the conference i realized that im capable of working 14 hour meetings on an hour of sleep, i can party and go all out and still do what i gotta do the next morning, i can negotiaite, i can tolerate a whole bunch of shit, but what i forgot to do was breathe and approach situations that were uncomfortable to me
which was pretty damn ironic since the whole purpose of this conference was supposed to provide us with the skills to find solutions to world problems by working with other people diplomatically in a professional setting, even if it made the other party unhappy or uncomfortable. you gotta do what you gotta do
i’m upset that i didn’t apply those skills with my own personal affairs; i was willing to keep my issues in the dark for the sake of other people’s happiness and in the end it blew up in my face. and in others. this was the first time i learned that i can take things i learn in a work setting and apply it to my own life.
just like with doing things that i love whilst being dumb serious like soaking my feet in jasmine salts and bubbles while catching up on class readings, or making really colorful large ass lists to hang on the walls of my room with all things i need to finish by the end of the semester, little stuff. step by step.
