context : sorrel has just returned from a month long trip, which none of VBS knew of until the last minute. she was going to miss RAD BLAST.
@wyfy-meltdown @rift-rifter-rebellion
The performance had ended for 5 minutes already, including encore. But the audience were still screaming and cheering, absolutely enamored. The air was static, electric, as the buzz of what they just witnessed remained.
I couldn't even blame them. Vivid BAD SQUAD had been absolutely incredible, and I was grinning like a freak, staring at the stage. Toya had blown away every expectation set on him, emotions raw and transparent. Akito had an era of confidence and connection with the group I had never seen before. An was pouring every drop of rage, regret, worry and joy into her vocals. And Kohane was... fucking incredible. As I expected her to be.
Despite how excited I was, my stomach grew increasingly hollow from anxiety, as I waited for Toya to text me. At that exact second, I recieved a ping on my phone, which I checked immediately.
" Toya : I'm on the edge of the crowd, front right. :)"
I sent a quick thank you, and pushed my way through the swarm of people, against the buzz and joy. My gut dropped further and further, as my dread increased. It was soon to be the moment of truth. My eyes met with Toya, as his eyes twinkled.
"Welcome back, Sorrel."
"You. Were fucking insane." I grinned, proud and happy. "You see that crowd? Being in there was easily the best experience of my life. Nothing can beat this moment..." I glanced at him, and he was smiling. "I'm so glad I made it."
"So am I. The rest of the squad saw you, by the way. In the crowd."
I shrugged, "Front row for a reason. No way I was being anywhere but there." He smiled again, leading me out of the audience and to a vending machine.
"Of course. The others want to come and see you, but Ken told them to rest. I told them I went to get some drinks for us."
I nodded, pressing some buttons for each persons respective drinks, eyeing Toya to make sure I was getting the right thing. I paid, and then passed his over to him.
"Thank you, Sorrel." "Dude, what kinda fuckass friend would I be if I made you pay for those drinks. You deserve like, 1000 of those for what you just did tonight."
He chuckled, and I realised how glad I was to be back already. But we took yet another turn, and my worry returned. A few more beats of silence, then Toya stopped at a door.
"They're through there."
I felt my body freeze up in anticipation. Toya glanced at me, sensing my anxiety. "It'll be fine. Just dont get angry, which you won't."
"Im really bad with confrontation, do you think I could just put these down and run back?"
He frowned at me, "No, that would be worse. Don't do that either... I'm gonna open the door now, ok?"
I nodded slightly, and he turned the handle, pushing it open.
"Finally, what took you so long? And where's our drinks man? Did you- oh."
Akito stopped dead in his complaint, seeing me as he moved from his seat to hug Toya. I took a step into the room, and passed him his drink wordlessly.
He took it, face a mix of rage, confusion, and what I hoped what joy.
"Hnmm, whasit?" An called, words slurred as if she had just woken up. Very An-like.
She looked over, and her mouth dropped open. "YOU."
I winced as she pulled herself up from where she was resting on Kohane, storming over and grabbing my shoulders.
"You're an absolute bitch. You- actually, give me that orange juice first." I passed it to her and watched her chug half the can, before she glared at me again.
"Why the fuck would you not tell us ANYTHING. First, you dont tell us you have a fucking apprenticeship in the UK, then you don't tell us that you will miss RAD BLAST, then you barely text any of us, and then you dont even tell us youre coming back early ?"
I waited for her to finish screaming at me, before; "I'm sorry."
An raised her eyebrow at me, so I continued, eyes on the final drink in my hands - plain water. "I'm sorry for not talking to you guys. I didn't know if I wanted to accept at first- and then I didn't know the dates until the last minute." I swallowed, looking around at them all. "And... I'm sorry for keeping poor contact. I really, really wanted to. But I was so busy all the time, painting and working. It was hard to find the time, along with the time difference. I did what I could."
"What about coming back early?" It was the first thing Kohane had said the entire time, and I tried not to be distracted by how gorgeous she was in her outfit. I felt my voice wobble a bit as I replied.
"That was also why I didn't engage much. I was working extra so I could complete everything before the deadline, so I was able to come back a week earlier. I arrived last night - I just spent the whole time sleeping. I'm really sorry."
The group stayed in silence, before Akito spoke. "Toya, why the fuck are you so calm about this?"
"Ah. She messaged me the other night, she wanted me to help her with getting into the show and seeing you guys after so she could apologise. She didn't want to get everyone's hopes up, so she just contacted me."
"So that's why you offered to get the drinks?" He nodded, and Akito sighed.
I was still holding Kohane's drink, and no one seemed to have anything to say, so I bit the bullet and walked over to give it to her.
I held it out, forcing myself to keep her gaze. She locked eyes with me, scrutinising me, and for a second I thought she was going to refuse it and tell me to leave.
Her fingers curled around the water bottle and my hand, and my breath caught, as I lingered for a second too long before letting go.
She took the drink, sipping at it, while I stood there dumbly, opting to lean against the wall next to her.
"You really scared me. I know you messaged me every chance you could - you replied to each and every text I sent, and you asked how I was. But you really scared me. All of us, we thought you wouldn't come back to stay." I didnt say anything, so she glanced at me again. "Are you? Don't lie to us, Sorrel."
I sucked in a breath, and spilled. "If my work does well, I might get to co-host a gallery of it all in a few months with another student. To prepare, I would need to work on a number of new pieces." I paused, glancing around the room as everyones gazed was fixed on mine, waiting for the sentence which could shatter it all. "...But I spoke to my Teacher, and he told me that should the gallery go through, I will be able to work on the pieces here, in place of my studies. So I can continue to support you guys while I do it."
Toya smiled, and Akito couldnt help a grin appearing on his face. An rolled her eyes, walking over and punching me hard in the arm.
"Thats for ditching us with no warning for two months." She punched me again, "And thats for working yourself too hard."
A small smile crept its way onto my face for the first time in that room, while I nursed what I knew would be a huge bruise, and Akito sniggered.
"But you'll have to go back for the gallery, wont you?" Kohane spoke, eyes on the water swirling in the plastic bottle.
"Um. Yeah. But only for a week - or even a few days. I'll come right back."
"And stay where? Won't your extended leave be up by then? Isn't it already?"
I could see her hands gripping tightly onto the bottle, almost as if it could burst, and I reached out carefully to them. She accepted the touch, and I rubbed my thumb against her palm.
"I'm sorry for worrying you so much. It's very confusing - I'm still figuring it all out. But I know I want to stay here, I cant go back. Not now that I've met all of you. I swear that no matter what, I'll keep you updated to the best of my ability. I won't do anything stupid like that again. I promise."
And I linked our pinkies together.
"...how can I be so sure." she murmered, voice small.
I gulped, "Well, you obviously can't know for certain... but I really truly never wish to do anything like that to you ever again."
"Why do you care so much? ...About me, specifically?" She locked my gaze once more, eyes watering as she gripped my hands tighter.
Out of the corner of my eye I could see Toya beckoning the other two away, and I mentally noted how I must buy him a coffee as thanks for all he had done.
"I mean- I thought it was quite obvious." I mumbled at my feet, and she stared at me. "No, I want you to say it, Sorrel. Tell me why. I dont want to make any more assumptions... especially if they dont turn out to be true."
I swallowed. The moment of truth. My palms were sweaty, and I suddenly wished I had bought a drink of my own. I mustered up what courage I had, and I gazed directly at her pupils.
"Because, during my time here, Kohane, I've come to admire you more than anyone else I've ever met. You inspire me every second I'm around you, and you cause a flurry of emotions that can't be expressed in words. Your flaws are there, but youre always polishing and refining them, so much so you're as perfectly imperfect as any one person could be. To lie and dissapoint you would hurt the wonderful person that you are - the person that... that I love." I choked out, seeing her eyes soften and water once again. "And I obviously love you all more than words could say, I wouldnt trade my spot here for the world, but I dont think anything could defeat the spot you hold in my heart. You're such a genuine, wonderful, person, Kohane. And you deserve someone else who is like that. I just wanted you to know, I dont want to lie anymore." I let go of her hands. "Sorry- thanks for listening to me. I'm sorry if I ruined the night of your life, you did incredibley."
I turned to go, my face a mess of tears that I had been fighting so hard to block this entire time. But a hand caught mine, curling round my sleeve in a desperate attempt to stop me from leaving.
"You said you would stay here, Sorrel. At least- at least let me say a few words."
I tensed up, turning round and facing the beautiful girl with water pricking her eyes who shone like a million stars in the spotlight.
"I love you too."
And she pulled me down to her height and grabbed my face and holy shit holy shit we were kissing and I could feel her fingertips by my eyelashes and fuck my face was probably so warm and her lips were so soft and-.
She broke off, smiling at me, before my vision was blocked by something black. She had propped her hat on my head, pulling it over my eyes with a smirk, as I stood dumbfounded.
"I need to get changed in the breakroom now. We will continue this talk later, okay?"
And she fucking winked at me as she pulled the door to her changing room open and I remained frozen as if I had been caught out in the arctic with a crop top and shorts.
