#pvns

[homophobicpunz]

ayo we got fellow boomer stans here? hellll yeah -pvnz

ur a boomer stan too??!! omg this is so awesome !!!!!

 punz user and boomer fan we are holding hands rn 

[lifeinmybody]

i really can’t believe how i’m feeling now compared to a few weeks ago. sure, i’m in a ton of post-surgical pain, considering i’m only 3 days out from surgery, but a year’s worth of chronic pain in my hip is magically gone overnight. this incision in my thigh is nothing compared to what that pain felt like. and it makes sense, since the tumor they pulled out was around 4 inches by 2 inches. that’s larger than two golf balls! they thought it was far smaller from the scan, but when they started pulling it out.. it just kept coming. (my surgeon called it a “clown car” tumor.) the doctor thinks i have tgct/pvns, which was the original diagnosis, except the final scan and surgery determined that mine is localized, not diffuse, which has a much lower recurrence rate - and it could actually mean that my surgery is curative!

i’m still incredibly incapacitated due to the nerve block and nerve pain pump keeping my leg pretty much useless, but i can do small movements now and i’m able to walk relatively effectively with the walker. all that being said though, i’d take this over the previous pain any day. it also helps knowing that this is temporary. i’m in surprisingly good spirits, all things considered. i’m holding onto hope and looking toward a brighter future, one in which my quality of life is worlds better than it is now!

[homophobicpunz]

i actually believe in your punz playlist supremacy. just a little fun fact -harlie

ty its so based i know😊

[homophobicpunz]

jack manifold and quackity :) -pvnz

quackity: which arc was your favourite?

again honestly im pretty new but honestly quackity! i think he has had a really cool arc for being quackity hes been legit doing stuff and im invested. and punz my beloved of course. be he hasn’t really had an arc lol

jack manifold: favourite stream?

i havent watched many lol but jan 20th end of the disc war and there’s this old stream of karl’s called “kareoke with sapnap” (i think? i know karaoke is spelled wrong) where they never do karaoke bc sapnap is super late but karl builds a underwater base with bbh and bbh talked about trees for so long and it was nice

ask game: people on the dream smp as smp related asks

[homophobicpunz]

tumblr unfollowed u 🤬 i got some words to say to them ... -harlie

oh no!!! glad to see u back 😎

[lifeinmybody]

i keep thinking “i knew it, i knew it, i knew it” - i knew that it wasn’t referred pain, i knew that it was something specific that was wrong. and yet, if I hadn’t pushed, i never would have gotten those mris and have a real diagnosis. and even now, i have to hunt for specialists on my own. the doc who ordered the mri told me the name of the diagnosis and to see an ortho... and that’s not even the right specialist. trying to process out this anger and disappointment so I can move through and heal.

[icarewhatyouthink]

the worst part about my knee pvns is that no matter what position my leg is in i am in pain when its swollen its just a matter of am i in severe pain or just mild pain

[lifeinmybody]

hunting for an orthopedic oncologist.. definitely not how i expected all of this to go, but at least i have a direction and some clarity. now i need to find a physician i trust, who also has specialization in pvns *and* hips.

i feel sad, tired, and mentally drained. i can’t fathom going back to work on monday, but i also know that routine and distraction will be good for me. and at least on monday i can start making calls to schedule appts with at least 2 different doctors to get a range of opinions, and talk to hr about short-term disability, fmla, etc.

on top of this, i am scared to hope.. scared to hope that this surgery, albeit painful, could mean that i could be free from my chronic pain. that feels like the most painful part of all.. the pain of hoping. and yes, hope is so powerful.