Briefly back to ask a question (or to tickle your thoughts)...
As I was in the kitchen eating leftovers, I over heard my mom reading the bible to my younger brother and one line that struck me as odd was, '...God created us to worship him.'
Our sole reason for existing is to praise them?
That's quite literally a text book narcissist. I'm hesitant to say this because even if I'm agnostic, if they are real I'm buying myself a ticket to fire town and I'm a little bitch when it comes to heat. In my experience growing up catholic I always was under the impression not being a narcissist and instead humbling yourself is an admirable trait in the bible. I feel like it's a twisted way of gas-lighting, like okay Jesus (who is also god) was humble af, so "worship me because I'm humble." Maybe I'm interpreting this all wrong but the bible really makes it seem like all our existence is any good for is to worship and be obedient. Like for what? I understand the morality for many things but there are other things that are so arbitrary that we HAVE TO abide by just because they said so and don't you dare question it because he's all knowing and you're just a stupid sinful human. From my experience these last two years having religion be an all encompassing part of my family, it has been odd... my father no longer consumes alcohol (but also he does? in secret?) I never saw his amount of drinking as an issue because it wasn't but that's the one change I have seen for the "better" because honestly I don't feel like I can talk to him anymore. He used to be reasonable but now he's rigid in his thought process as well as being way more patriarchal than before. My mom, well she knows I'm gay but she pretends like I'm just not interested in anyone and drops sodom and gomorrah casually. Basically there is no room for different beliefs or questioning of God, only worship. But if it were anything else say you know a golden calf (Story of Moses) it is absolutely mad. Imagine the game Sims, now imagine the premise of the game being... creating sims just so they could obey your arbitrary rules and worship you and if they don't they are damned to an eternity in misery. ISN'T THAT MAD?!?! It would be a twisted game. I hear time and time again "god is love" but i also hear "god is jealous" like sure you can sin but as long as you're sorry to them and worship them you're okay? but lets say another person not a perfect track record of being "good" but doesn't worship god real long purgatory or hell? I don't know but I thought love was meant to be unconditional regardless of whether the person offers it back or not. I know they say God loves sinners but it's caused many people including me a lot of pain to the point that I can't go to sleep without having nightmares about it. I would be much more inclined in believing in a deity that wasn't so reliant on my worship if I could get over the hurdle of believing in a higher being first off.
