#quitetheruse

[sirloinlovesemus]

Shenanisprog!! There you are, old boy. And Shayne Ruse. The Rusesprogs! Good to see you both. Say...if you’re quick, there are still elephant ear cookies. A favorite in my clan! 

Here are your wristbands. 

[sirloinlovesemus]

Evening, sproglodytes! Thank you so much for making the trip out. It’s wonderful to see the room so chocka. Special thanks go out to my fellow chaperones, our janitorial crew, DJ Mike Drop, and to the planning committee, who have been hardout to the days. 

Now, I have the honor of announcing your king and queen. An electro synth drum roll please, DJ Mike Drop. 

Your king and queen are...Kaden Ruse and Victoria Hollendonner! Congratulations! Please come to the front of the stage for the coronation.

[drunkonpowerade-blog]

HEY COFFEE CHICK! You are surprisingly hard to find sometimes, especially on this last day of school. ANYWAYS here's the invite to my birthday party, it's at a roller rink this year. You like ice skating right? Or hockey? Whatever, point is, I'm expecting you to kick ass at blading around. Oh! And I couldn't find the rest of your crew, could you hand these invites to them too? I have a lot more ground to cover. ANYWAYS SEE YOU THERE! -rushes off down hall-

WE’LL BE THERE! -Crosses arms and shakes head- I’m going to crush everyone at skating. Especially Basketball.

[knickknackaugustmack]

[txt] GUS MY BROTHER'S AN IDIOT AND HE PUT ME IN A SHIT MOOD! SAY SOMETHING FUNNY TO DISTRACT ME

[TXT] Uh. I’m not very funny so I’m resorting to looking up puns.

[TXT] The future, present, and past walked into a bar. Things got tense.

[TXT] I couldn’t believe it when the doctor said I was colorblind. The diagnosis came completely out of the purple.

[TXT] A clown held open the door for me. It was a nice jester.

[TXT] Why couldn’t the bike stand up by itself? It was two tired. 

[sirloinlovesemus]

What a rousing success [REDACTED]’s first theatrical endevour was! Jolly good show, sprogs!

[sirloinlovesemus]

Why, Shenanisprog! It’s been yonks since we had a yack. What a happy coincidence, actually. I’m planning a bit of a lark and hiding board games around the school. Would you like one? I still have Perquackey!

And your friend! Hello, sprog, I don’t believe I’ve ever gotten your name. I’m Laurence Loin, but you sprogs seem to have made a habit of calling me Benefactor, I’m told.

[knickknackaugustmack]

this afternoon. u, me, my kitchen, good food. y/y?

Yeah. I should warn you now, though. I legitimately prefer mac-n-cheese with hotsauce to lobster. Expect little of these tastebuds.

[knickknackaugustmack]

-Finally chooses a table in the corner of the restaurant-

Waitress: Do you need a minute to look at the menu?

Yeah. More like ten minutes.

Sure thing.

-Ten minutes later-

Do you still need another minute to decide?

No. I guess I'll...I'll have a chocolate milkshake and...a personal pan pepperoni pizza.

Say that three times fast! I'll have that right out for you, doll. -Walks away-

...personalpanpepperonipizza, personalpanpepperonipizza, personalpanpepperonipizza--

Oh, hey, it's high school royalty.