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Love - A Dreadful Bond

Between - Namjoon X Reader [Y/N] Genre - Angst Words - 7,910

Backstory - It was the perfect relationship with him. The two of you felt like the perfect match but sadly all matches die. Obstacles and struggles can come anytime and it’s all good when gone through together with him. The 3 year relationship seemed perfect until you started to notice the change in him. The silence, the distance, the expressions and intentions; it all started to rise and you knew it would come to an end.

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

A/N - Italic fonts can either be flashbacks or the thoughts of a character.

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Part 2

Five boys were sitting together in their dorm with all their eyes fixed on the headline news. The news that shook everyone who knew Namjoon, close or not. Neither of the boys expected this coming, so they were all sitting with confusion written on their faces and also sharing a confused look with each other too every now and then.

“Wha-what? How can this happen?” The youngest one asks not directing the question towards anyone in specific. “How can it not?” One of the older one says while rubbing his forehead with his finger. “No but wasn’t he-” “Jungkook. We can’t be sure of it right away.” His other hyung says as he bites his nail. All the boys were obviously shocked to see this happening. Especially since they knew about you and Namjoon, even when they weren’t supposed to know. “Lets hope we get invited.” The second youngest laughs but stops when everyone else gives him a poker face, not amused with his humor. “Tae, it’s definitely not a time to joke around.” Taehyung rolls his eyes at their reactions. He did have a point. Why would any of those other 4 be invited, leaving him and his other hyung, Hoseok, aside. “Yoongi, call Hobi. Ask him if he knew any of this.” The eldest of them, Jin, orders the other as he gets up to answer his now ringing phone. “Yes, Chairman.” The rest of them look at each with widen eyes at hearing that word.

As Yoongi gets up to phone the younger, the three younger boys lean back and let out sighs at sync. Jungkook gets up to go to the kitchen while Taehyung and the other boy, Jimin, stare at their eldest talking to the Chairman. The Chairman of Kim Enterprises calling one of them in person always meant that it was something really important.

“Okay Hobi-ah, thank you.” Yoongi ends the call and runs a hand through his black hair while letting out a frustrated sigh. “He says he didn’t know either.”

~(Y/N)’s point of view~

Everything crushes inside you as you stare at the television screen. Bomi switches her gaze towards you when she senses something and she waits for you to move a little at least. You were frozen in one place, unable to function. The thoughts you had in your mind, this was a perfect reason to believe them. Did he really not love you anymore? How long had this been going on? Soo Jung, the name was too familiar to you. She’s Namjoon’s cousin, he always talked about how they grew up and how she had confessed her feelings for him but he refused each time. You knew you weren’t the first girlfriend for Namjoon, but he was your first boyfriend and it just killed you inside after seeing this. Especially with Soo Jung related to it all. Does that mean that he finally did fall for her too? Did he lie to you before too? Was any of it real?

Tears were starting to fill your already swollen eyes as your ears decipher the voices coming from the television. You take a few steps back and get a quick glance of Bomi’s face too. She was staring at you with concern while she was leaning forward on the couch to get up. You quickly run into your bedroom and lock the door as tears start to fall one by one. Bomi runs after you and starts slamming on the door, telling you to unlock it. You sit on your bed as you pick up your phone. You stare at your screen for a while then open the messages and go under Namjoon’s contact.

You: Is this true?

Pressing the backspace to erase that, you sit for another minute.

You: Are you really done with me? Is it really my fault?

Backspace.

You: How can you even do this?

Backspace.

You: Please tell me this isn’t true.

Tears were falling unstop at this point as you press backspace again. All the feelings were mixed right now. Sadness, depression, anger, frustration, confusion, hate, pain. You didn’t know what to do anymore. Your hand tightens around your phone but it slowly let goes of it when you throw your phone across the room and aim it on the wall next to the door. Screaming out, you grab your hair and slide down the bed while crying out as much as you could. Overthinking was one of your biggest problem and at a time like this, it was getting over the limit. You couldn’t stop it. You couldn’t do anything. Blaming yourself for everything that’s happened. You never thought of yourself as the most perfect or beautiful person. You knew about your flaws and always tried to accept them and be happy but people always fall. People always have bad times where they doubt or hate or bring themselves down. This was more than just a bad time. This was you losing your everything, you losing the one person you never wanted to lose. This was you wanting Namjoon back but not knowing how to. This was you wanting it stop but you couldn’t. This was-

“Ya!! (Y/N), if you don’t open this door, I swear I’ll-” Bomi stops yelling and runs down the hall as she remembers something.

After a few seconds, you hear her run back to your door and hear the door unlock. Bomi walks in and sees the state you were in and walks to you to hug you but you push her back. This was normal for you. You always pushed people away at times like this because you didn’t want people to see you like this, especially Bomi. She deals with your nagging and stubbornness silently and finally pulls you into a tight hug. It may seem too dramatic for anyone else to see you cry like this over a boy but Bomi knew what Namjoon meant to you. He was a friend then he gradually upgraded his way up till here and he meant everything he said to you. She saw the glow your eyes held when you were with him. He was the best thing that could ever happen to you, after Bomi of course. She understood why you’re acting the way you’re acting. This is the first time you had fell in love. First love always leave huge marks and wounds if they don’t work out. Bomi went through it and you were there for her back then. This was time for Bomi to do the same to you although she hoped it never had to turn out this way. Plus she always knew that you were weaker than you look. You could act fine or good or not too broken but deep down you were always too weak at times like this. At times when you fell or had bad times. She knew it all and she was doing all she could to keep you going. If Bomi had a chance to attack Namjoon, she would but she also knew that even now, you will still protect him and it was killing her to see you this way.

The tears wouldn’t stop, the pain you were feeling, the betrayal, everything. It was all too much to take in all of a sudden, and with the wedding, you couldn’t do anything. How could he marry someone after leaving you like this? All these things were starting to make you wonder when he started feeling different because you knew he loved you, he obviously did. So why did it turn out like this? Bomi’s voice was a fade in your head since the thoughts were screaming out. Your chest feels like it’s crushing into pieces, it was hurting you even while breathing. Your head was throbbing with pain and your throat was begging for some water. Your body was starting to shake because of all the crying. All the crying caused by Namjoon. This had happened before but not this serious. Before, he even promised it won’t happen again but now you were in this situation because of him.

Once you do stop crying, you freeze in one position. You didn’t have the energy to move or to feel anything right now. You force yourself to stop crying and sit up to stare in front of you. Letting the thoughts fill your head, you stay still like a statue as Bomi watches you, waiting for you to do something at least. The door bell rings multiple times and Bomi runs to open the door, leaving you still. The fast footsteps you hear from down the hall were familiar enough to turn your gaze towards the open door. You look up at his sweaty body and hair, his heavy pants were obvious that he got here as fast as he could. Your crying starts again as he walks towards you and pulls you into an embrace once he gets on his knees.

“I got here as fast as I could.” He says to both, you and Bomi. His hands were rubbing your back and his other hand was patting your head as he was shushing you. “Hobi-ah, can you please tell me this isn’t true?” You sob out into Hoseok’s shirt as he pulls you tighter into his embrace. Bomi was starting to cry a little by seeing your state so she leaves to get some water for both of you. Hoseok keeps telling you to stay calm and that it’ll be alright but it was only causing you to break down even more. “Hey.” Hoseok breaks the embrace by pushing you a little back so you face him. He cups your face and wipes away your tears. “Stop crying, okay? I know him since we were kids, he wouldn’t do something like that without a reason. I’ll talk to him and ask him what the fuck is going on. Okay?” He wipes away your tears and takes a glass from Bomi when she arrives. He puts the glass on your lips and makes you drink the water even when you refuse. “That’s enough. (Y/N). Please don’t do this to yourself. I’m here for you and so is Bomi. I’ll beat him up for you. I’ll hang him upside down. I’ll kick his ass.” Your lips curve into a small smile at Hobi’s words and he clicks his tongue after seeing how forced and sad it looks. “Come here.” He pulls you back into a tighter embrace while you cry a little more.

Hoseok has been your friend ever since the beginning of high school, he had summer dance classes with you; that’s how you two met and coincidentally you two went to the same school. He is as close and important as Bomi is. Namjoon and Hoseok knew each other even before you and Bomi knew them. They grew up together ever since they were babies, there were five more other guys you heard of but you had never seen them. Neither Namjoon nor Hoseok spoke about them. They just mentioned that it was them seven boys since they were kids but without any details. Not even names. According to Hoseok, it was better you and Bomi stayed out of it because Namjoon and the others had a huge fight which caused the group to split. Hoseok was neutral in the situation since he had moved to America during that time. When he came back, he found out that you, Bomi and Namjoon were friends and the other boys stayed away from Namjoon, leaving Hoseok aside. He didn’t have anything against any of them nor did they have anything against him so they let him be as he was with you, Namjoon, and the others. Hoseok had always been so cheerful with you, he always helped you when you couldn’t ask for help. He was like another you. You had seen him have hard times and it always broke you to see him that way. You, Namjoon, and Bomi have always been there for him and he has always been there for you and the others. He cared for you all the time and made sure nothing bad happens to you. Namjoon trusted him with you too. Though Hoseok and Namjoon were the same age, Hoseok had graduated with you and Bomi since he missed 2 years when he went abroad. He is like your best friend and your own older brother that you could never have. You trust him with everything just like how you trust Namjoon and Bomi.

Hoseok didn’t let go of you until you stop crying. Even when you did stop, he was still holding you because you were too weak at this moment. He probably knows how it feels to watch the person you love with someone else. He always had feelings for you but he never said anything because he noticed how Namjoon always looked at you, with that glow in his eyes. Like you were his everything. He couldn’t confess his feelings so he stayed quiet all the time and eventually got happy when he saw you happy all the time with Namjoon. Of course he still had feelings for you but he controlled them in his own ways. Through singing or dancing, through teaching and helping other people in his dance academy. You shift a little and that’s when he moves back to look at your face. He lets out a sigh and gets up while gently picking you up and placing you on the bed. You watch him with tired and hurting eyes as he picks up your phone and puts it on the side table. Then he picks up the glass and takes it out to the kitchen and walks back after a while in with a box of tissue and a plate of food. He orders you to sit up and you silently just do it, not wanting to nag or give him and Bomi a hard time. Breaking the food into little bites, he shifts them unto the chopsticks and brings it up to your lips to feed you. You try to take it from him so you can eat on your own but he hisses, making you stare at him.

“I’ll feed you so you eat all of it and not just 2 bites.” He says as low as a whisper and moves his hand forward, asking you to open your mouth. Bomi was leaning on the door frame, staring at you and thinking how you’ll get through this. You weren’t as strong as you made it seem to everyone. You cover it up so others didn’t worry about you and everyone close to you knew it. Hoseok keeps giving you bite after bite, even when you stop him. “You can’t ruin yourself over this, (Y/N). Don’t ruin your routine or yourself in any way. Please.” He sounds stern yet calm. He was ordering you but also comforting you in a way. “I’m here for you, Bomi is here for you, your parents are here for you, your friends are here for you. And we all care about you too much and we can’t see you like this. Okay?” You nod your head slowly and fix your pillow behind you so you can lay down. Hoseok gets up and hands the now empty plate to Bomi and turns to give you water again. Once you finish drinking, he tucks you in bed and plays with your hair for a while until you fall asleep. He stares at you for a while then leans in to kiss your forehead. “We all love you. And we can’t see you crumble, especially me.” He whispers to your sleeping state. Then strokes your hair last time and leaves the room, leaving you to rest.

~Namjoon’s point of view~

Everyone had eaten lunch and watched the article and news spread like wild fire. Namjoon’s father and his uncle congratulate each other and him and Soo Jung then go into the office to talk alone, leaving Namjoon alone with Soo Jung. She looks at him and smiles. Namjoon stares at her with an emotionless face then turns to go upstairs to his bedroom. Soo Jung follows him around even when he didn’t want her to. When he opens his door, she lets herself in and sits on the bed.

“You can’t just walk into my room like that.” Namjoon stares at her while she makes herself comfortable on the bed. “Why not? This will be our room after a few weeks.” Soo Jung purrs, causing Namjoon to get even more furious than he already was with everything and everyone. “Sure. It will be, but right now, this is my room.” “Oh stop being so boring. Always so serious with me.” Soo Jung rolls her eyes and looks around the room. “You should be happy since you’re engaged and-” “Why? Am I supposed to be happy?” Soo Jung looks at him and gives out her cheeky smile. “Are you that happy?” “Obviously. I’m finally able to call you mine.” “Just by words and contracts.” “What?” Namjoon scoffs and shakes his head slowly while putting his hands in his pockets. “I’m only yours because of the contract. Don’t expect me to touch you in any way.” “Are you seriously going to dwell and drown yourself into a sad pit because of a girl?” “Are you seriously going to be happy, knowing that you ruined that girl’s life?” Soo Jung’s smile disappears after hearing those words. Namjoon knew that Soo Jung always liked him. He knew a lot about her even though she was good at keeping her secrets. She is his cousin and they did grow up together so obviously he knew things about her even if he didn’t want to. And he knew that she was soft deep down, even if she acted tough or mean. Namjoon smirks after knowing that it did affect her right now. She obviously wouldn’t like that either. “Then why did you accept this?” “You think I had a choice?” “I’m sure you did. There is no way you couldn’t have think of a way. If you love her the way you say, why didn’t you come up with something?” Soo Jung was building up her wall again. She was being tough again and Namjoon couldn’t do anything, not in the state he was already in. She figured out his weakness and used it against him right away. Soo Jung scoffs this time and folds her arm as she walks towards Namjoon. “I know you’ll tell me to cancel this wedding and engagement but I won’t do it. I didn’t come all the way here to cancel it. You agreed to it so now deal with it too.” “Alright. If that’s what you wish.” Soo Jung bites her lip and starts smiling but it fades when he starts speaking again. “But, don’t expect me to touch you in any way. In front of people, we’re happy. In this room, we’re no more than this. So don’t expect anything from me.” “That’s not fair.” “You agreed to it so now deal with it too.” Namjoon turns around and opens the door to walk away but stops and looks back at her. “Look forward to the ceremonies, it may be the only time I’ll touch you.” “What about her?” “What about her?” He repeats while staring in front of him. “What are you going to do?” Soo Jung asks and the concern in her tone was too obvious. “That’s not your business.”

Namjoon walks out the room, leaving Soo Jung by herself. He walks down the stairs, towards his father’s office. The walk down the hall was reminding him of last night and yesterday. You must be too messed up at this moment. He knew that and he was feeling it too. Both men were laughing out loud inside the room but it stops once Namjoon knocks on the door.

“Yeah, Joon-ah. What’s wrong?” The Chairman smiles and the fake tone in his words was making Namjoon sick. “I have to head out for a while. I’ll be back after a while.” He bows down to both Chairmen and smiles as they say goodbye to him.

Namjoon wasn’t sure where he was going to go but he had to leave this place right now before he flips at everyone. Soo Jung was descending down the stairs with a sulky face and she rolls her eyes at Namjoon when he looks at her. He knew she was going to suffer, he didn’t want her to but that’s all he can do at this point. Namjoon ends up in Han River, staring at the still water in front of him. This place held so many memories of him and you. You were everywhere and you were everything for him. Everything was reminding him of you. Every shadow, every movement, every place, and every corner. He was already in the sad pit that Soo Jung said, it won’t be long for him to drown deeper into it. If he was feeling this way, then you were feeling ten times more than Namjoon and that was worrying him. He bites his lips and tries to stop his leg from jumping constantly by putting his hand over it. Namjoon looks at the ground, thinking about whether he should go with the idea that has just popped in his head or not, and he lets out a deep sigh then picks up his phone from the bench.

~(Y/N)’s point of view~

You were sleeping after Hoseok’s help. He constantly walks into the room to check up on you and smiles at your sleeping state. You look so small and quiet. You look completely different from when you’re awake. He keeps checking for a fever every now and then too because he knew you’ll get a fever at this state. Bomi and Hoseok keep sharing a sad smile when they see each other around the house. Your pain was causing them pain. They both knew how much it will affect you and it was worrying them out. How will you be able to cope with your routine now. How will you go back to the (Y/N) they knew 2 days ago.

“I’m worried for her, Hobi-ah.” Bomi says, leaning on the kitchen counter as Hoseok was cooking dinner. “She’ll act like she’s fine but she’s worse. She’s going through worse than what we actually went through. She doesn’t even show a complete percent of the pain she’s feeling.” “I know.” Hoseok nods, focusing on the steaming pan and the meat on it. “What we’re seeing right now isn’t even the beginning of what she feels.” Bomi wipes away a tear that was trickling down her face. “Hey, don’t cry. We’re here for her. We’ll help her get through it.” Hoseok turns and holds Bomi’s shoulder while looking into her eyes. He gives her a smile and pulls her into a hug. “We’ll make sure nothing happens to her. No matter how much she’ll push us away, we have to pull her two times more. Okay?” Bomi nods slowly, still worried. “I swear I’m going to attack Namjoon. No one saw this coming. Sly bastard.” Bomi says while breaking the hug as Hoseok goes back to the food. “I think there’s more to this. He can’t just break it up. You and I, we both saw how happy they were. We both saw the love and glow in his eyes every time they were together.” “People change. They fall in love so they can fall out of love too sometimes.” “That’s not true.” Bomi was about to protest but Hoseok interrupts by holding his finger up. “I’m not defending Namjoon. What I’m saying is, only people who choose to stop loving actually fall out of love. And in their case, I don’t think this is the case.” “You sound like you’re defending Namjoon here.” Bomi grits her teeth and clenches her jaw. “I’m not. You know how I feel about (Y/N), Bomi. And I still feel that way. I’m not depressed nor am I suffering. And I didn’t choose to stop loving her. If I wanted to, I would’ve.” “How long are you going to do this? Why didn’t you tell her?” “How could I?” Hoseok looks at the floor and smiles as he leans on the counter opposite to where Bomi was. “I saw the love in her eyes for Namjoon. I couldn’t confuse her and I couldn’t ruin Namjoon’s life. He’s already suffered and she’s already suffered. I couldn’t ruin their happiness because they saw something in each other. So I silently love her, but I never think of it the wrong way.” He lets out a sigh and looks away to the side. Thinking of you and everything about you. “Seeing her happy made me happy and that’s all I wanted. To see her smile. Whether it was with me or someone else. I’ll just wait for that someone who makes me feel this way towards them. (Y/N) means a lot to me, her happiness, her health. She means a lot and if I have to be there for as a friend then I will. If I confessed my feelings, she would’ve felt awkward because she doesn’t see me like a man but at least I’m her best friend.” Bomi was staring at Hoseok with empathy and pity. Hoseok laughs and shakes his head. “I’m fine. Trust me. I’ll take her as any way I have to. As a friend or more. At least I’ll have her.” He was right. You did mean a lot to him and he didn’t want to ruin it. He loved you silently. It was joyous in its own way, even though at times it would get painful. If he had to love you on his own, he will do it. And if he had to confess, he would. But right now, your happiness and good health was his first priority. He loved you as a friend and more and it was for him to deal with. Bomi pouts her lips and walks over to pull Hoseok into a tight hug. He starts laughing out at her actions and then hugs her back. “I hope you find someone too.” She says in a low, sad voice. She was obviously sad at his situation. “Okay. Okay. Stop being so cheesy.” They both laugh and then go back to doing their own thing.

Hoseok sets the table with Bomi’s help then he goes to wake you up. It was already 8pm so he had to wake you up and make sure you eat. He walks into the room and hears a phone ring outside. Bomi runs towards the ringing phone and freezes at the caller ID. She clenches her jaw and inhales to keep herself together. She walks over towards your bedroom door and closes it before accepting the call.

“What?” She asks in a stern tone. “Where is she?” “Why do you care?” “Bomi, give the goddamn phone to (Y/N). Now.” “No, Namjoon. No. You’ve caused enough damage to her small, innocent heart. Do you even have any idea what she went through in only 2 days? And you don’t get to be angry or curse at me or her. You ruined her. You fucking destroyed her. She’ll want to talk to you obviously but what will you say to her?” “Bomi, listen to me. I need to talk-” “And say what to her?” Bomi interrupts Namjoon and scoffs. She was right. What will he even say to you. “That you’re sorry? That you had to do it? Why didn’t you give her a full explanation before? Why did you do this, Namjoon?” Bomi lets out a small cry and then sighs. She rubs her forehead and takes a deep breath. “Why did you hurt her this way?” Namjoon was silent on the other side. He didn’t want to answer any of this. Instead of explaining himself, his anger, guilt, and pain takes over and makes it worse. He sighs on the other side. “Sorry I called. I just wanted to know if she’s okay or not. I guess she’s not.”

As Namjoon hangs up, Bomi scoffs and throws her phone on the couch out of anger and frustration. Her hands run through her short, lilac hair and she lets out a loud sigh as she inhales and exhales to calm herself down. She turns around to see Hoseok staring at her. She shakes her head and he gestures her to stay calm and makes her sit at the table to eat. He whispers that you’re awake so Bomi starts to act normal. You walk out of your bedroom and have a dull and sleepy face. You look around and see the food on the table. Even though it was mostly your favorite dishes, you had no appetite. You look at Bomi and Hoseok sitting and waiting for you so you take a deep breath and try to control yourself. You give them a smile as you slowly sit down while looking at the food displayed.

“Who cooked it?” You ask in your dry, hoarse voice. “We did, half her, half me.” Hoseok says while taking your plate to put the food for you. “And you’re going to eat all the dishes.” “I can’t eat alone.” “We’ll help.” Bomi gives her cheeky smile while grabbing her food.

Hoseok puts your plate in front of you and demands you to finish it all even when you nag. He insists on feeding you again but you tell him you’ll do it. Hoseok and Bomi talk about random things while you slowly eat, being lost in your thoughts. Namjoon keeps coming back into your thoughts and the memories replay again and again in your head. It was killing you slowly. Your chest feels suffocated and heavy again. You feel that huge lump in your throat again. You look at your best friends and notice how hard they were trying to make it feel better, to make you feel better. It hurt you to see them worrying this much too. To see them worry for you. You silently vow to yourself to make it less visible. Not let them know so much for their own sake.

“Ya, eat this.” Namjoon’s hand comes closer to your mouth and he stops inches before your lips. You smile at his action and open your mouth to let him put the food into your mouth. You two were home, eating together after a long time since you were both busy with your university. He had to deal with his dad’s business and then he had to deal with the university midterms. He was already in his fourth year of university while you were still in the second year so things were more hectic for him at this point. You two spent the day outside then took food and decided to chill at the apartment you two had decided to get so it was your own place to spend time at. It was your own place where you’d live till you could, until Namjoon would be busy with his life again. He had the idea to get a place where you two could escape everything and be with each other, despite all the other special places you two had. “Did you add tomatoes in this?” You look at him with a disgusted face and he starts laughing, like he intended on doing it on purpose. You swallow the chewed up mess forcefully then look at him with an unamused face. “Ya! You know I don’t like them so why’d you add it.” You nag, causing him to give you his cute dimple smile that squeeze his eyes shut. Dropping your chopsticks, you get up with a sulky face, knowing he’ll follow. “Baby, I was just messing around. Come back.” He grabs your wrist and pulls you into a hug. His chest leaning on your back while his chin was supporting his head on your shoulder. You smile at his cuteness and look back at him to flick his forehead. He lets out a hiss as his hand shoots up to the area that was turning red. You make a run for it before he grabs you...

“Ya. What’s wrong?” Bomi asks you, making the memories playing retreat into the back of your head. You shake your head and say nothing then go back to eating. You feel Bomi’s and Hoseok’s eyes burn into your skin, they both knew what was happening. Obviously you would have the memories come back to you. They both look at each other with pity filled in their eyes, pity and worry for you. Hoseok mouths “it’s okay” to Bomi and they go back to eating again. “Should I go to my parents house this week?” You ask them, clearing your throat to push the lump back into your stomach. You couldn’t make them worry too much like this. They both look at you, eyes widen like they weren’t expecting you to speak. You stare at them, waiting for an answer and Hoseok breaks the awkward silence. “Do you want to?” He starts picking on his food, without looking at you. You curse yourself in your head for being so awkward all of a sudden. “I don’t know. I think I should.” “Don’t.” Bomi says, making you and Hoseok stare at her with a confused look. “Why not?” You ask her, putting your utensils on the plate. You already knew what she was going to say but you had to hear it from her. “Do you not know your parents? The first thing they’ll ask is about Namjoon and I’m sure you won’t be coming back here for a long time once they find out what happened. Plus, do you really think you can face them at this time?” “Bomi, I think you-” “What? I’m not wrong here.” Bomi interrupts Hoseok’s attempt to make her stop. She looks at him then back at your frozen expression. She is right. Your parents wouldn’t let you out of their sight if they see you like this and you couldn’t make them worry about you over this. Even if they saw it on the news, you had to stay normal for them. “Am I wrong?”

You shake your head and let out a sigh as you start picking on your food. Everything that has happened, happened so quickly that you were now lost even though it’s been 2 days only. It was more painful since you had seen Namjoon change into someone you didn’t know anymore. It all tear you apart after seeing the news right on the next day. Bomi was right. You didn’t have the strength to face your parents. You didn’t have the strength to be okay with his mention. Hoseok asks you about what you were going to do tonight and you just shrug silently. You weren’t in the mood to do anything. How could you. Every second was killing you. Every second was making you realize that this is real, it’s all actually happening. You keep looking up at Bomi and Hoseok, sensing that something was wrong. They would change the subject every time they notice you sensing it. Hoseok suggests that you three spend the night together but you tell them you have some assignments for next class that you have to finish. You didn’t lie about the assignment but you lied about staying home so you could finish them up.

After you three finish up the dinner and clean up, you go into your room and drop on your bed. Everything was tiring you. Even breathing was getting hard. Staring at the ceiling, you hear whispers from the kitchen. At first you didn’t want to eavesdrop but your ears perk up at the mention of his name. You get up from the bed silently and walk on your toes to reach the wall next to the door. You lean against the wall and rest your head on the wall too.

“So? What did he say?” Hoseok whispers in a stern voice. “He said he wanted to talk to her.” Bomi whispers but then you hear a sniff. She must be crying. Your heart starts to ache all of a sudden as your chest feels cramped again. “I didn’t know what to tell him so I told him no. What else could I have done, Hoseok? If she hears his voice now, it’ll just ruin her more. I can’t let her go through what I’ve went through before. It sucks. It really sucks and she’s weaker than me, she’s still little in this.” You hear the sound of friction against a surface, it must be Bomi running her palm up and down her upper arm, she always does that when she’s worried. You close your eyes to stop the tears from coming. “He sounded so different. He didn’t sound like the Namjoon I knew and he obviously didn’t sound like the Namjoon (Y/N) tells me about. The words came out so sharply and hurtful.” She sniffs again and the sound of a tissue flying out of the box. Even listening to Bomi cry hurt you a lot. You weren’t mad at her for not giving you the phone, you knew she was trying to protect you. “I got mad at him and told him he doesn’t get to hurt her that way. He may know her completely but he still doesn’t know some stuff.” “Hey. Stop crying please. Try to be strong. If she sees you this way, it’ll hurt her even more. And what you did, it was good so please don’t blame it on yourself.” You hear two steps and then you hear deep sighs after Hoseok tells Bomi to come here. You wipe your tears, failing to make them stop. “It’s going to be alright. And I will ask him what the fuck is going on. I have to. So you and (Y/N) please don’t worry too much. I’m here for you guys, okay?”

You give up on the eavesdropping and walk into the bathroom. Staring at your reflection in the mirror above the sink, you see how emotionless you looked. Emotionless yet full of emotions. You notice your eyes turning red and your nose building up the redness on the tip too. You put down hands around the edge of the sink and take deep breaths in attempt to calm the thoughts forming in your head. How could he do this? Did he do it for a reason just how Hoseok says or did he do it just because he didn’t feel the same? How is it so easy for him? Was it me? You look back at your reflection and feel the insecurities rise up inside you. Running your hands through your hair, you close your eyes and take a deep breath as the grip on your hair tightens. You feel a panic attack creeping it’s way up to your skin too but it all stops when you hear a knock.

“(Y/N)?” It was Hoseok. “Yeah?” You answer back, not wanting him to worry. “I’ll be leaving now okay? But I’m coming back first thing in the morning okay.” “Wait. Just a second.” You say and quickly wipe your face with shaky hands. You were desperate for something at this moment and you wanted him to be there. You open the door, not caring how obvious it seemed that you cried just seconds ago. Hoseok looks at you with his eyebrows risen and his bottom lip hidden behind his upper teeth. You open your arms and go for an embrace. Hoseok holds you right the next second as your bodies are in contact. His arms wrap around your waist as you pull him closer from the shoulders, hiding your face at his neck. You hear him take a few deep breaths as he feels your tears trickle down his skin. “It’s okay.” He whispers into your ear and rests his cheeks against your soft hair. The grip on your waist tightens as your body starts to shake a little. He was familiar with this feeling. He knew what you were going through. “Hey.” he says and waits for a response but you don’t respond so he speaks again. “Hey, do you want me to stay?” You nod slowly against his skin and sniff to allow yourself to breathe. Hoseok rubs his hand up and down your back in attempt of calming you down. “I’m here. Don’t worry.” He walks back, taking a step and waiting for you to take a step forward. Continuing the action, he stops when his calves touch your bed and turns around, picking you up to put you on the bed. You let go of his body and wipe your remaining tears away. Hoseok stares at you silently, his heart was hurting him to see you like this. He couldn’t deal with seeing you like this. A part of him was starting to hate Namjoon and he wanted to beat him up for doing this. You keep wiping away the tears while your eyes were fixed on his shirt that was in front of you. Even though you were feeling his stare dig into you, you couldn’t look at him. Hoseok traps your legs between his legs as he gets closer to pull you into another hug. As your head touches his chest, the first thing you hear is his heartbeat. You wouldn’t describe it as a normal rate, it sounded like it was faster. Your hair moves slightly as he speaks, his breath brushing against your hair since he was resting his head on top of yours. “Are you going to your classes tomorrow?” “Yeah, I have to.” You say in a husky voice while breaking the hug. “Will you be okay?” You look up at him and nod slowly. You won’t be okay for sure. You knew it and he knew it too. But you both also knew that staying at home wasn’t going to get you anywhere so you had to get away from the house every now and then. “I’ll come with you tomorrow.” “No, it’s fi-” “I’ll come, (Y/N). You can’t say no.” “What about your academy?” “I’ll delay the time. It’s fine.” You stare at him and notice the concern he had for you. But you still couldn’t block his path because yours was blocked. “Hobi. It’s really fine.” “You said you had assignments to finish? Let’s do them together.” He diverts the subject, not wanting to argue about it and turns around to walk towards the desk in the other corner of your room. You watch him going through your notes that were spread on your desk messily. You get up and walk towards him to start working. You weren’t in the right mood but you had to do it to keep him and Bomi from worrying.

You tell him about the assignment and start working together since he knew about the subject. Hoseok was taking the same major as you, Business Management, but he had taken some classes before you during summers. He wanted to finish early since he graduated from highschool late too. He was in his third year while you and Bomi were in the your second year even though you three graduated together. You two decide to sit on the floor and do it together. You keep noticing Hoseok’s eyes turn to you as he watches you work. You didn’t know what he was thinking, you did see concern for you and sadness but there was something else that you couldn’t tell. Every time you two shared eye contact, he breaks it off by smiling at you then would tell you more things related to the assignment. After an hour or so, you were done with the assignment, thanks to Hoseok, and you lean onto to the bed behind you, letting out a sigh while running your hand through your hair. All of these things going on was making your head want to explode. You watch Hoseok pick up the coffee mugs that you two drank from earlier while working. He leaves the room and comes back to start picking up the mess of the papers on the floor but you stop him, telling him that you’ll do it. You organize the papers and put them on top of your closed laptop but as you’re about to get up, Hoseok snatches the things from your hand and puts them on the desk for you. You whisper a thank you and he grabs your hand, taking you to bed.

“It’s 11pm. You have to rest.” He says while climbing your bed and pulling you in with him. It was normal for Hoseok to be cuddly with you or Bomi, you two would hug him or share cuddles or kisses on cheeks or foreheads. It was normal for you but little did you know that Hoseok’s heart would jump more and more each time it happened with you. It takes guts for him to able to do it without being awkward. He leans his back against the wall while you climb in too, pulling the blanket to cover both of your bodies. Hoseok watches you silently and smiles as your head touches the pillow. He lifts up his arm to support his head on the palm while he plays with your hair with the other hand. Whispering a goodnight to you, he tells you to close your eyes.

Hoseok watches you sleep, still in the same position. A little higher than where your head was, his hand that was holding his head was turning numb but he didn’t care. He couldn’t take his eyes off of your sleeping state. You looked so innocent and well while sleeping, not knowing anything nor feeling any pain. His heart was aching him after seeing you in the state earlier, the way you sobbed into his shirt. It was hard, especially for you. Tears trickle down his face as he thinks about how you’ll deal with this. You weren’t as strong as you acted like. And seeing you suffer, it made his heart rip into pieces.

“How will you deal with this, (Y/N)?” Whispering the question to you, he knew you weren’t going to answer back but he wasn’t looking for an answer from you. He just wanted to look for ways on how he could make it better for you. He moves forward, hovering over you a little to reach the phone on the table. Picking it up, he looks at time; 12.30am. As he tries to go back into the comfortable position, he hisses silently as he feels you move a little, afraid that he woke you up. Instead his heart skips several beats as he feels your soft, tiny hands grab a fistful of his shirt, pulling him closer to your warm body. He awkwardly scoots closer too while wrapping his hand around your waist to hold you in place. Once he makes sure you’re still asleep, he leans in closer and whispers something he can never say to your conscious self.

“I love you.” He says before closing his eyes and praying for good times to come as quickly as possible.

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Hope everyone liked this. Leave a like and check out my other works too.

A/N - This part is basically just the reactions of the characters and a sneak of what might happen. A lot more is to come in this story so look forward to it. And I would like to sincerely thank everyone that showed so much love and support to the first part and also to my other stories. Really appreciate it all!!

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