#rawsm

[meme-loving-fucks]

Running away with sexy men Chapater 8; Freedom

Firstly, I must apologize for the lack of a post yesterday. I will make up for it today, by reviewing this and another story! ( still not decided which, yet. Probably Maiding for sexy men. ) But I must say this; if you find a fanfiction that you want to have reviewed ( Doesn't have to be Hetalia ) then submit it right over! If you want some actual reviewing, rather than me shrieking mindlessly, state so, but if you do actually want to hear me shriek mindlessly then, with pleasure. XD But now, enough rambling, onto this horrible thing we go! 

"Why do you stay in your room all day?" Sweden asked you.  "Because this house is too big for me to navigate myself!" You slightly raised your voice. You really were annoyed with not being able to find your way in the house. Seriously...why does Denmark have to have such a bullshit damn huge mansion?! SEVEN GOD DAMN CHAPTERS AND WITHOUT FAIL YOU STILL MENTION HOW FUCKING BIG THIS HOUSE IS. /WE KNOW!/  Also they should draw you a map or some shit. 

"You can always just call for one of us." Sweden suggested. You sighed. That...was a good idea. ... You never thought of that before? You're dumb.  "Okay. I will then Mr.IK-" You stopped yourself from finishing the sentence. "I mean Sve." You decided to go with that nick-name. It fit him better and most of the Nordics all called him that. Maybe you should too. Oh wow, she learned some motherfucking respect.  "Very well then." And with that Sweden left. Yeah, Sweden! You go you walking entity of sass!  NOW you were stuck in the hallways again. What to do now? You thought for a moment. You were always talking to The Nordic 5...how about to tried hanging out with The Baltic Trio now. Just for a bit. You were /just/ in your room.  But which one to visit? You never talked to Estonia so far...maybe you should now. You decided to call for him. No... NO NO NO NO NO NO! LEAVE MY NATION ALONE!  "Estonia!" You yelled. No answer. Go figure. He's smarter than to answer you.  "It's open." You looked to your side to see that the room your were in front of...belonged to Estonia himself. Convenient as fuck.  "Oh..." You mumbled. No how ironic was this? You walked in to see Estonia doing what he did best...educational stuff. It seemed like he was doing calculus. He had a few books open on his desk and you could already feel yourself falling asleep.  That's not how you use "ironic", darling.  Well, at least we pride ourselves with being one of the smartest nations in the world. What have you against it, Jessica?  You always hated math. You always loved history thanks to Hetalia. If you only love History because of Hetalia then you're not allowed to love History.  Now did you dare ask it? "Watcha doing?" Yes you did dare to ask. ... Of course.  "Figuring out the full number for pi. It seems that you can solve it with calculus and the periodic table." He said matter-of-factly. She knows what pi is??? Well, they do teach it in school... But Estonia! Proud of you, little buddy, you go figure that number out! But eh... if pi consists of every number combination in the world... Estonia, I don't think you're going to do it, love.  "But the periodic table is Science...right? Why are you combining Science and Math?!" You questioned him. You barely understood what you were saying yourself. Maybe he is having fun. Leave him alone.  "It seems that pi IS Science and Math." You sweatdropped. Like you cared at all. The hell with Math and Science. You wanted to be a History teacher! Don't sweatdrop, that's the single most stupid thing you could- oh we have gone over this already. Sorry.  To hell with Math and Science* Darling, you're hardly ever going to be a History teacher if you can barely speak English.  "That's...fascinating..." You lied. "Well, I'll be going now." And with that said you escaped from hell. Hell. Only because you're a dumbass.  Never would you bother Estonia during such times. Ever. Again.

And on such a note we end Running away with sexy men! Now, I don't know if this will going to be continued, since the author said that she will look back at her old works and see if she will continue them. Let's hope, for my sake, that this will remain at 8 chapters. Also fuck you for spoiling Estonia... I'll have you know that Estonia prides itself with its nature and /historical/ value. You know, historical, as in History. 

-Moonie

[meme-loving-fucks]

RAWSM aka thank fuck this one's short

You never knew that out of everyone HE would be the stalker. You really expected it to be Sweden or Iceland but no. It was HIM! Out of all of the men in this house HE was right there in front of your face when you woke up; giving you the scare of your life. WHY ARE SWEDEN AND ICELAND BRANDED OFF AS STALKERS???????? SWEDEN DOESN'T NEED YOUR DEMENTED ASS, HE HAS FINLAND AND THAT GOD-DOG OF HIS.  "N-NORWAY! YOU GAVE ME A HEART ATTACK!" You screamed as you clutched your blankets and breathed heavily. I doubt that would give you a heart attack, sweetie, if it did, you'd be dead and I wouldn't be here, reading this shit.  Norway didn't respond, he just stood there with his blank face. (Shit, isn't his Engrish voice just so sexy?) You blushed. Oh gott was he so suspiciously sexy... Engrish? Really? Are you Japanese now? Why are we talking about his voice if he hasn't said a word, anyway?  That's all there is to Norway's character.... standing around with a blank expression and not speaking a word.  Suspiciously sexy is going to be the compliment I'll give every girlfriend of mine from now on. "Hey babe, you're looking suspiciously sexy today!"  "Good morning." He said as he sat on the foot of your bed. You blushed harder. That was about the first time you heard his sexy (English) voice. Huh... That so? Nosebleed time for sure now. Before you could even think that, there was a towel to your nose. Norway had knew that a nosebleed was coming. "Fangirl." He told you. You blushed even more. No. You ruined Norway. *collapses onto her knees, crying*  Damn sexy Nordic... Guys, it's almost like sexy is the only adjective she knows.  --- "Morning!" You said with happiness as you walked into the kitchen; greeting Finland. I... actually have nothing to bash about this paragraph.  "Oh, [Y/N], hello." Finland greeted to you. His smile made you want to faint or worse...go fangirl. Wait. What? Y/N? What happened to Jessica?  Time to get serious now. "What happened to Hanatamago?" You questioned. He sweatdropped. He hoped that you wouldn't ask that. Sweatdropping. Sweatdropping everywhere.  "She's at the trainer's place to...get her anger management fixed." You laughed at this. She doesn't need anger management, she's a perfectly normal dog who you made evil for the sake of having someone to be jealous of. Now fuck off.  "Doggy anger management? Pfft, now THAT made my day." You smiled and sat down by the counter on a stool; still laughing. Wiping a tear you exited the room. "Thanks, Finny!" You shouted as you left the kitchen. Don't. Call. Him. Finny. Also if I was Finland Jessica would be dead now. Nobody laughs at my baby dog but me.  --- "Gawd...did Sweden make this house himself? IKEA everywhere..." You sighed as you tried to find your room in the big house yet again; only to get lost yet again. Really? You get lost in every motherfucking chapter? For fucks sake...  "Yes, I did." You jumped and clutched your heart as you turned around to face Mr.IKEA. Do we really need to call him that...? I mean, really, you didn't call America Mr. McDonalds in KBSM...  "MR.IKEA! YOU SCARED ME!" You yelled. Sweden sighed. He hoped that you wouldn't say that... He actually asked you pretty nicely not to call him that...  Sweden gave you a look of what he meant to be "really?" when really it just looked intimidating. He looked like a huge teddy bear to you. An intimidating teddy bear. Also I'm putting my money on Sweden in this; he seems like he's sensible and sick of this bitch getting lost...  "Help me find my room?"

Say no, Sweden, say nooooooooo. 

Well aren't I a happy camper! This was a short one and only one more chapter to go! Then I'll tackle MFSM... Which is going to be more hellish than this one as it has the British isle brothers in it... *sigh* I love those guys... 

-Moonie

[meme-loving-fucks]

RAWSM CH6 aka Moonie's tears.

Two more chapters after this one, guys... But she promised to look back at her old fanfiction and update. Seriously, I'm going to throw up if I force feed myself any more of this crap.

So...ON WITH THE STORY! P.S...this chapter will have some mention of IKEA in it. I do not own IKEA. I should be afraid, shouldn't I? --- You would have confronted Finland about the whole "Bitchy-Dog" thing after you heard what Lithuania told you but, you knew the stupid little bitch would get in your way. Damn, did you hate that dog. You hated the dog so much that she made you swear! And you barely even swore! I hate you so much that you make me swear. Leave Jesus-dog alone, she did nothing to you. And "getting in the way" of your stupid romance isn't a good enough reason to hate the poor thing. An unnoticeable light-bulb appeared magically over your head while Lithuania went on about Hanatamago. You had an idea. ... A light bulb. YOU'RE WRITING NOT ANIMATING, YOU IDIOT! Why confront Finland about the "Bitchy-Dog" problem when you could ask Mr. IKEA...I mean Sweden about it? You stood up with magical sparkles floating around you. Your idea was so brilliant! There was no way that it would fail! Mr. IKEA. Really now? Would that make Estonia Mr. Skype? Magical sparkles...? You know what... Just go die in a hole... "Jessica...why are you sparkling and how/where did that yellow sparkly background appear behind you?" Lithuania asked you. Jessica is a Edward- I mean a Mary Sue. That's why she's sparkly and with a yellow background  AND GENERALLY SO KAWAII DESU IT MAKES ME SICK TO MY STOMACH. You could only sweatdrop and open then close your mouth a few times before you could respond. "I do not know where!" You smiled before you yelled "I'll be back!" Then you rushed out of your room and down the hallway. AND WE SWEATDROP AGAIN. THIS IS NOT AN ANIME, YOU DIPSHIT. You didn't know where the hell Sweden's room was but...if you could find a mochi store in your small city, then of course you could find Sweden's room. ... I don't even want to know anymore. Determined, you set off of your finding. (*cough* ADVENTURE *cough* The house is big enough for an adventure.) WE. UNDERSTAND. THAT. THE. HOUSE. IS. BIG. ... After figuring out that you were completely lost, you decided to take to extreme measures. Surely. "MR. IKEA! WHERE ARE YOU?" You yelled into one of the many hallways of the house that you were now lost in. Fucking extreme that is... I also like to live my life dangerously. As if on cue, Sweden seem to -magically- appear behind you with a grunt. At the sound of this grunt, you turned around to face "Mr. IKEA." Magical teleporting Sweden. Oh how I feel for you, my dear neighbouring nation. "For future times, please don't refer to me as "Mr. IKEA." Sweden said as he put a hand on your shoulder, looking for understandment in your eyes. You only tried not to laugh at "Mr. IKEA." But, it was hard to not laugh at Sweden when he had that poker face on -which was slightly intimidating but, very much more sexy. HAVE. SOME. MOTHERFUCKING. RESPECT. SLUT. "A-alright..." You slightly giggled but, did not break out in full laughter. "Mr. IKEA." You mumbled to yourself before you started to burst out in full laughter. You feel to the ground and started rolling around on the floor and clutching your stomach. You could feel a few tears slip out, you were laughing so hard. I'm sorry Sweden... I'm so so so so sorry... Oh God, brb I'm going to throw up. "May I help you? Or can I take my leave now?" Sweden asked you in his intimidating -sexy- voice. I-I am back- Oh fuck, brb again. It took you a few minutes to stop laughing and to get yourself to calm down before you answered him. "Yes. I have a problem with your dog, Hanatamago. She keeps trying to murder me. It's like she is jealous of me. Especially with Finland." You spilled out. *deep breaths* I'll try not to throw up anymore. LEAVE. THE. DOG. ALONE. Sweden could only grunt to you as looked down and placed his finger on his chin. He looked as if to be deep in thought -thinking for a solution to your problem. It didn't take long before he spoke up and answered you. Sweden. Honey. Please bash her skull in and tell her that there's nothing wrong with your dog. Please, dear, please. "It looks like I will have to put her in training again. Don't worry, she has done this with others too. She just gets...in her protective moods." He answered with a smile on his face, he was trying to make you feel safe...as if things would be alright. You could tell this. (Other people would be scared at his intimidation.) FUCKING HELL NO!!! If someone told /me/ this about my dogs I would personally stick something up their ass and cut their throat. "She does it to Lithuania too!" You added quickly. "It will all be fixed in her training. Don't worry, min kära." He smiled a bit more at you with soft eyes then nodded as he left, to go off to get Hanatamago to her training. (min kära = Swedish for: My dear) Way to go, you can use google translate. As you watched him walk down the hall and out of sight, you forgot to ask him one last thing... Because you were still lost in the house. Just how were you going to find your way back to your room? Who else could you yell for? Oh no. Is kawaii desu dipshit lost again? WELL STAY LOST. "Damn Denmark...he's lucky that his sexiness stops me from killing him for having such a huge house." You thought as you walked to the end of the hallway only to be met by yet another fork. 1. He's a nation, there's nothing you can do to kill him. 2. He's just break you in half, dipshit. And I'd laugh. "ICELAND!" You finally yelled after wandering around for a while. You jumped up with fear as one of the doors in front of you to your right opened up to reveal Iceland. Convenient for our little Miss. Sue. "OH MY GOD! YOU SCARED THE CRAP OUT OF ME, ICELAND!" You yelled as you clutched your heart. Iceland just popped up like that...you thought it would be a ghost or something. But of course. Ghosts. Iceland chuckled at you. He thought you were so cute. He could tell that you were probably lost in this house...again. ... He was probably just laughing at how dumb you are. Do you do anything else but get lost in this god damn fic? "I'm sorry." He said as he closed the door that he was holding then leaned against it. He smiled at you. "What were you doing in there?" You asked as you pointed to the room behind Iceland. He only blushed for a second. What was in there to make him blush at you asking? Maybe it's his room? "It's my room." He said as he looked to the side. "W-why are y-you blushing?" You stuttered to ask Iceland. he was just so cute when he blushed! It made you blush too! No. Fuck off with your blushing. "Ah...no reason really. Just letting my thoughts get to me." He sighed before he looked back at you. "Would you like me to lead you back to your room? Author is too much of a baby to write about Iceland masturbating. Ha. Well, she probably doesn't know what a penis is. "Sure." You said as you let him. ... As you went back to your room, you were surprised that Lithuania was still in there. Lithuania probably has a life and better things to do than sit in your room. Besides; it's an ugly room. "Why are you blushing?" He asked you as you entered the room. "I just realized that Iceland has a bit of a perverted mind." You said as you went to your bed and grabbed a pillow to fangirl out on.

How do you make that assumption? You don't even know what he was blushing at. Maybe he just had a fever. Dears, I'm going to go now and cry. But I got two chapters done today... Still. *curls up under a blanket and cries* -Moonie

[meme-loving-fucks]

Running away with sexy men CH5 ( aka bye bye Moonie's sanity )

These chapters are getting shorter... Thank fudge. Now I set myself a target: I shan't swear during this chapter. *sarcastic laughter* Good luck.

Italics = your thoughts Alright. Good to know Jessica has a brain to think with. I doubted that just in the previous chapters. "E-excuse me?" You asked Sealand as he held out a chunk of steel to you. Huh. "This is a piece of my country, take it." He said as he placed the chunk of steel in your hands. You wanted to giggle then squeal at this. It was just so cute that he was giving you something but, it was funny that it was a chunk of old steel from his country. His country was, just an old WWII base made by England. Bit- *ahem* Woman, he's giving you a chunk of himself ( ewwww ) I don't find it "funny" in any way. That's actually really sweet. Huh. "Thank you?" You said. You tried to sound nice but, it came out as more of a question. Sealand only blushed and left as he chuckled, like a shota [1]. He WAS a shota too. You /tries/ to sound nice? As stated above, he gave you a chunk of himself, which probably wasn't easy to chip off. Also what the fuck is a shota... *goes to check author's notes* "[1] Shota is a term for boyish. Like, young boyish. Sealand's age boyish" Oh. Okay. But why do you need to use that word...? Is it even English? Or is it a weeb word? I don't even know. As the shota ran off you smiled, before you got hit in the head with an unknown object. You didn't fall to the floor but, you had to lean against the wall as you rubbed your head. HAH. SERVES YOU RIGHT. "Ow. What the hell was that?" You continued to rub your head. You looked down to see the unknown object, a dog ball. "Don't tell me." You turned around to see Hanatamago about ready to pounce on you. Had she threw the ball at you? (Imagine this: a dog spiting a ball out at you. A HEAVY ball.) A dog wouldn't be able to throw a ball at your head. Also dog balls aren't that heavy, you frail little piece of- fudge. Piece of fudge. I am pretty sure dogs can't spit objects. Take it from an owner of 3 dogs. Also Hanatamago is me. I was reborn into this fanfiction to have my revenge on Jessica as Hanatamago. "Grrr." She went as she circled around you. You wanted to run but, then you would look like a coward and you actually weren't afraid of the little bitch. You were just afraid of hurting HER. How hard is it to write "she growled"? Oh no. You were afraid to hurt her after you promised to boil her in oil. Did PETA phone you up or some shit? "If you know what's good for you, you will just leave me alone." You said in a very stern voice with your teeth clenched together. She only barked at you, which angered you. This dog is our saviour. Bow down to our saviour Hanatamago. I was honestly half expecting for her to run off at Jessica's "intimidating" voice. "Leave her alone!" You could explain that the voice belonged to Mr. Puffin by the Italian Mobster accent but, all you SEEN next was a flash of black and white. Mr. Puffin and Hanatamago were fighting. Noooo Mr. Puffin, I trusted you!!!!!!!!!!!!! You were glad that Mr. Puffin was helping you out with this little bitch. She sure was mean after she seen you make googly eyes at Finland. It WAS a GREAT thing that even thought you almost choked Mr. Puffin to death, he still was helping you out now. What. Has. The. Dog. Done. To. You. Also, Jessica, you have really low self-esteem... Seriously? You're jealous of a dog? Not wanting to get caught watching the two animals fight, you ran back into your room from the hallway. I'm sure you're too kawaii desu and nothing will happen if you do actually get caught. You sighed before you collapsed on your bed. You hoped that you wouldn't be accused of or suspected of starting the fight going on in the hallway. Why would you be suspected of it? THE ENTIRE WORLD DOESN'T REVOLVE AROUND YOU. Plus, don't these nations have anything to do? You know... Like... Running their nation? No? Ah, okay. OH MY GOD. I have figured it out! Jessica is just an excuse to procrastinate on their work for the nations!! They pretend to be taking care of a girl with a mental illness instead of doing paperwork! ... "S-she tried to a-attack you t-too?" Lithuania stuttered as you told him why Hanatamago was fighting Mr. Puffin.  Too? He had caught then outside and stopped them but, he decided to ask you if you knew anything. As soon as you told him you made him promise not to tell a living soul, which he agreed to easily.  What exactly did you tell him...? "The dog is trying to steal Finland from me, boo hoo." "Wait, did the little bi-, I mean dog try to attack you too?" You asked as you looked at Lithuania with a look of surprise.  ... Will you stop calling the dog names? "She did! She's so evil! It wasn't my fault that I couldn't tell that she wanted me to take her outside to go pee!" Lithuania rushed out. I doubt she'd attack Lithuania. And I doubt he would be such a pussy about it. "I'm starting to get a feeling that Hanatamago is pure evil..."

She is; to you, because she's me and she wants to murder you. But... What was the point of the author's note (?) in the beginning of the story? There wasn't a sentence in Italic... Ay never mind, I should know better than trying to find logic in this fic. -Moonie

[meme-loving-fucks]

Running away with sexy men CH4

It's a short one, guys, a short one. It's okay, I'll be okay... I'll be alright...

Your first morning in Denmark's house with other sexy men, you woke up to Mr. Puffin pecking at your head. "OW!" You yelled as you softly pushed away the black and white -with a multicolored beak- Puffin. "What the hell was that for? NOT COOL, DUDE!" You yelled as Mr. Puffin inched away from your flailing hands. Leave the bird alone. You frail little shit. "I'm sorry, I was just trying to wake you up!" Mr. Puffin yelled in an Italian mobster accent as he flapped his wings, -scattering a few feathers onto your bed- only to gain one centimeter of flight before he epic-ly fell on top of your thighs with a small thud. "Epic-ly" isn't a word. Don't use it. "OHMIGAWD YOUR SO CUTE~!" You yelled as you glomped the puffin and choked the life out of him with your fangirl squeeze/arms. And her we go again... "As much as he deserves it, don't kill the bird." You heard the one and only Iceland say as he walked to the side of your dark colored bed. You instantly let go of the flightless bird and glomped Iceland instead; surprising the hell out of him. She couldn't kill the bird even if she tried. Trust me, Iceland, she's too kawaii desu. "GOOD MORNING SEXY!" Slipped out of your mouth as you continued to squeeze the life out of the Icelandic teen. Because that's the first thing that would slip out of your mind when you're greeted by the strange man that kidnapped you. You couldn't see Iceland blush over your extreme fangirlism -and the fact that your head was in-between his stomach and chest- but, you could hear him gasping for air. You decided to let go after a while more of his intense gasping. Fangirlism isn't a word. If it even becomes one then I will jump off a bridge. Again, I don't think this little dipshit is strong enough to make Iceland gasp for air from a hug. Unless he's terrified because an ugly, demented bitch is touching him and possibly spreading the crazy. "B-breakfast is ready." He muttered under his breath as he turned around and shyly walked out of your room with Mr. Puffin in his arms. "I can't help but glomp you." You upsetted-ly said as you lied back down on your bed. Within a few seconds, you were asleep once again. STOP INVENTING WORDS AND LEARN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. And before someone gets on my ass for "maybe she's not a native speaker" I can assure you that I'm not either. My first language is Estonian, my second is Russian. ~Five minutes later~ This time you woke up to Hanatamago licking your face. The cute little white -slightly curly haired- dog barked like a toy dog when she seen you open your eyes. *Saw "Bark." She went as you sat up. She slightly jumped back to avoid getting hit by your now stretching arms. WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL THESE POOR ANIMALS?! "Aw, how cute are you?" You said rather calmly as you pet her soft little head. "Bark Bark!" She excitedly went as you continued to pet her head. She sure was a happy and energetic dog. "She's cute isn't she?" You heard a voice say from behind you. At first, you didn't know it was Finland so you smacked whoever it was in the head. Aren't you the "greatest fangirl" who's able to recognize all the voices? You're contradicting yourself, author. "OW!" You turned around to see Finland clutch his head. Damn your reflexes! You just hit Finland in the head! You don't say. "I-I'm sorry." You stuttered as you tried to help Finland, only to get Hanatamago to push your hand away from Finland with her moist black nose. YES! YES! THIS DOG IS OUR SAVIOUR! "Bark." She went as she snuggled up close to Finland. Wait...WAS THIS DOG COMPETING WITH YOU FOR FINLAND? No, she was trying to save him from the horror that is you. "What a b-" you caught yourself before you said the word. Instead of taking action, you decided to go get ready for the day. Finland, don't pretend like you didn't hear that and shoot her. "Damn that dog. She was cute for a moment than she went all protective over Finland and made me feel jealous. Does she WANT me to boil her in hot oil?" You thought as you ran around your room, getting ready. WTF. It's only a dog, you dipshit, calm the fuck down. If that dog angers you, try thinking about what I'm feeling. Boiling you in hot oil wouldn't even begin to cover what I want to do to you. I wish your head to decorate my front yard on a stake. By the time you put your hair up in a ponytail, Finland was back to normal and was petting the little bitch, Hanatamago. It made you sick. all of this time, you thought she was the cutest dog in the series (Besides Germany's) and now here she was, make you jealous of her and Finland. Good thing she was a female dog. There was your excuse if you accidentally called her a bitch for real. Your Finland?? You really are demented... LEAVE THE DOG ALONE OR I'M CALLING PETA OR SOME SHIT ON YOU. "I'm going to breakfast." You said as you walked out of your room. ... Are you trying to be a walking entity of sass? As you tried to walk down one of the many hallways, you got lost. Oh no. You're so kawaii desu that you got lost. Oh noooo. "Why does Denmark have to have such a huge house?" You thought as you tried to find your way to the staircase, which seemed impossible to find in the damn huge house. WE GOT THE FACT THAT IT'S HUGE IN THE LAST FUCKING CHAPTER. "How am I supposed to find my way in this house?" You yelled. "You need an escort." Denmark said as he from behind you to the front of you. He stood in front of you and looked down. "Don't go wandering around all by yourself. We can't lose you here, can we?" Convenient. Because she'll surely get so lost in the house that she'll starve to death and not see any of the other 9 people living there. But then again, this is Jessica. But then again, we aren't given the pleasure of her dying. As you blushed Denmark chuckled as he patted your back. "Why do you have to be all shy right now? You were fangirling out just yesterday!" He exclaimed to you. ... Don't give her ideas, Denmark, you'll regret it. "Do you want to see me fangirl out on you?" You tried to say it in the most creepiest voice you could muster. (You actually scared yourself a little on the inside too.) Because Jessica's voice can certainly be /that/ creepy. Gosh, what a fucking Mary Sue. Denmark only sweatdropped as he helped you downstairs.

FUCK. I thought we weren't going to "sweatdrop" in this fucking fic, BUT I GUESS IT JUST WANTS TO TEST MY LIMITS, EH.

I'm out and done... Luckily this is only 8 chapters long, oh thank the loving fuck.

-Moonie

[meme-loving-fucks]

Holy mother of all chickens... We're back here with Jessica an her gangbang. Well shit, you guys, let the rage continue.

Actually I'm going to try and rage a little less... No promises, though, this is a pretty horrid one... But now... Onto his horror we go!

When it came to the cold you hated it. You have lived your life in one of the most sunniest states besides Arizona. You were from California so the 15 feet of snow that you and the bachelors had to fight through in order to go into Denmark's house, killed you. You SWORE that you felt as if you had frostbite but, when you took of you right hand glove -luckily for you- your fingers were not purple nor black, they were only a baby-pinkish-cold-like color. They just looked really, really cold. And they were very cold.

Even though we've covered that this is more of an OC fic than an reader insert, I'd rage a bit on this, if I may. /Don't write it in a second person view if it's an OC fic./ I was born and raised in Estonia, where I went to school with the snow up to my neck and the thermometer showing -35 Celsius. Also it's colour, but that's not really my point to butt in...  Sealand looked over and noticed this and took your left clothed-by-a-glove hand. He examined both of your hands before he stuck them in his huge snow jacket pockets alongside with his warm unclothed hands.

And why didn't they give you said warm snow jacket if they knew it was going to be cold? "W-what are y-you doing?" You asked him as he held your hands in his pocket. His fingers held your hands as he rubbed his thumb softly against your knuckles.

... Anyone else feel that this is a bit OOC? No? Just me? Alright. He looked up at you as he guided you to the couch to sit down on. He tucked both of your feet in when Sweden came past by with your luggage in his hands. "I'll be taking these to your room." Sweden said as he walked away, eying Sealand suspiciously.

Why? Is he really jealous of Sealand? If so, he must have some low self esteem. Sealand looked back to you as you slightly shivered. Man, was Sweden scary and intimidating but, then again sexy as he did that. You then stopped fangirling on the inside for a bit so you could look at Sealand again. He had a huge smile on his face. Oh gosh...he was so young but...he was so cute! You kinda felt like a France...like a pedophile to poor Sealand-kun.

WE DID NOT JUST GO THERE. I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO BE CALM, BUT THIS IS IT FOR ME PLAYING NICE. BITCH, /FRANCE IS NOT A MOTHERFUCKING PAEDOPHILE!!!!!!!!!!!!/ *heavy breathing* Where's my shotgun, honey? I must kill a bitch. Also, referring to the OC bio on Jessica (?) that we had in the previous chapter in the notes ( on the DA page ) "you" or Jessica is 15. That would make you as old as Sealand, if I'm not mistaken. And, if fact, it would make the other grown men paedophiles. "I was just trying to warm your hands up, sorry." Sealand said as he let go of your hands and put them in your lap. You were just about to respond to Sealand when Lithuania came to sit down on the couch next to you two. "I'm so glad that I'm away from Russia." He sighed as he literally started to fall asleep on your shoulder which only caused you to blush a whole tomato field. Man, was Lithuania's sleeping face look so cute! Who cared if he was 19? He was hot and sexy!

Wow Lithuania, way to be random. Also I do think you've gotten over the whole Soviet Union deal. Y'know, Estonia sure has. Enough to not to mention it every waking hour anyway. Also why should you care if he's 19??? As you stared at the sleeping Lithuania, Sealand decided to go to his room. It didn't look like he was going to get any farther today.

ANY FARTHER WITH WHAT? "I feel like a stalker." You said as you continued to watch Lithuania sleep.

No, you're just a miserable little girl who should be put in a mental ward. "This is no place to sleep, Tolys." Estonia sighed as he picked up his friend and threw him over his shoulder. You watched as Estonia took Lithuania upstairs to his room. What a typical nerd, Estonia was. But, he was still kinda hot too. You giggled as you thought of that one picture that you seen of him before. It had Estonia looking that the viewer of the picture while in a comment bubble it said "I'm going to treat you like my homework...slam you down on my desk and do you all night long." You loved that picture, it was hilarious. You could never imagine Estonia telling you that, ever. End of story.

Where did Estonia come from...? How does that make him a nerd??? And most importantly, you just stated that the whole Estonia is full of "typical nerds". Well, this is the second time during this fic that I feel insulted. GG, author. And no, Estonia wouldn't say that. I'm glad you at least got that right. You sighed as you laid back on the couch. You were going to live with nine men...err, make that about two men, six teenage males, and one boy. Who cared about age though? They were all SEXY, CUTE, and AWESOMELY FROM HETALIA. Damn, would it be hard to pick just one of them. How could you just pick one of them?

By stopping yourself from being a little slut. Somehow you would have to and you hoped that that time didn't come anytime soon. ... By the time that dinner was ready (made by Norway), your room was already completely situated for how every long you would stay. Your room was just how you wanted it to be and it was ready to be lived in. Your room had all of your belongings in it (except furniture), as well as some new furniture. Any wood in your room was cherry wood. You had a wooden vanity, drawers, nightstand, and head board for your bed. You bed had pretty dark blue sheets, in fact everything was in a pretty cherry wood, dark blue, white, and dark purple color/design. You personally thought that your room was rather cozy. Your room had 4 regular white walls and a light green rug. Your ceiling was shaped in an upside down V so one ceiling wall was light blue and decorated as if it were daytime and the other was dark blue and decorated as if it were nighttime. You really liked that. Even thought your floor had a green rug though, you could remove it to reveal a very dark brownish-black wooden floor. Your room looked like it came out of a catalog.

I'm no fashion expert, but it sounds like a really shitty choice of colours to throw together... As you sat on your bed, admiring your new room, someone knocked on your door. "At least I know that they'll knock in this house." You thought as you got up to answer your door. You opened your door to reveal Finland. You had to look up to look at his chocolate colored eyes that made fun of your plain light blue eyes. The black specks in his eyes literally made your black specks in your eyes feel like committing suicide. Finland's eyes were just so...beautiful. It was worth looking up seven inches to see them.

Wait. Is this happening after KBSM? If it is, then I'm committing suicide. Why the fuck do you have black specs in your eyes?? I've never met a person with black specks in their eyes. And I'm pretty certain Finny didn't have them either. Finland smiled at you as you admired his eyes. He was completely oblivious of your checking his eyes out like the fangirl you were.

You had to mention that, didn't you? "It's time for dinner now, Jessica. Norway-san tried to make some foreign food for you today so, we're having pasta. Your Italian right?" He said in his normal voice. Finland was showing again, he loved to start a conversation.

You're* You're going to be murdered by me just for that. Normal voice? Since when does Finland have split personality disorder?? "I h-have Italian in m-me." You slightly stuttered as you started to follow Finland out of your room and downstairs into the dining room. The whole house was...wow. Denmark must've had PLENTY of money to have such a fancy house. It was high class just by looking at the walls with the beautifully hand painted wall paper that covered the walls. "That's great than! We added seal meat into it...I hope you don't mind eating seal." Finland said as he scratched the back of his head.

Aren't seals endangered? I'm pretty sure they are... "That's alright. I've ate snake before." You said. You felt comfortable around Finland. You could comfortably talk to him like this. You felt as if he could be your friend already. He just had that aura and personality that made people get used to him more often. Finland must've had tons of friends, if it weren't for the intimidating Sweden.

What does eating snake have to do with anything. I've never eaten either, but I'm pretty sure they taste different... It took a while to get to the dining room, since the house was so damned big but, that was okay. The dining room was HUGE. The mahogany table was HUGE. The silverware was GOLD. The plates were hand made and painted with scenes of landscapes. The whole room matched and there was only one problem.

It's fancy and huge. We get it. Where were you going to sit? No one but Norway, Denmark, Finland, and you were in the room. "Where is everyone else?" You asked as you sat across from Norway and Denmark, where the chairs were all empty on that side. "Their coming, it just takes a long time with the huge house." Denmark said as he put his elbows on the table.

They're** YOU DIPSHIT. ( And no, I'm not pointing out every spelling mistake or we'll be here forever.) Denmark, it's bad manners to put your elbows on the table... "Take them off." Norway said calmly. Denmark got the idea and took his elbows off of the table. Whoa, you never knew that Norway was a proper freak.

Oh. You wanted to impress these men so, you let your hands rest in your lap, sat up straight, and made sure that your back didn't touch the back of your wooden chair. Proper, just like your naggy aunt taught you whenever she visited.

I don't think naggy is a word... But then again, I use dipshit a lot to describe this shitty author. You hoped that they noticed because you looked down. Your auntie never said anything about eye contact so you hoped that this wasn't rude. Within a few minuted the dining room was filled with all of the residents of the house. Finland sat next to your on your right and Latvia on your left. Of course, Norway an Denmark sat across from you. You were very surprised and you almost went through another fangirl level when Sweden served the food to everyone. But do you know why you fangirled on the inside? It was because Sweden was dressed as a butler. Oh shit...was he sexy. Why? This is so fucking random... Though then again, I bet this was just for "fan service". As you silently ate your seal pasta, you eavesdropped on everyone's conversation. You wondered why no one was talking to you but, you were too soon to speak. "How tall are you exactly, Miss Jessica?" Latvia asked you as he took a sip of...WAS THAT WINE? So? He's been alive for far longer than you, you little dipshit, I'm sure he can stomach his wine. Besides, come on, it's just /wine/... Oh yeah huh...in Latvia's MyAnimeList profile, it says that he can drink about 40 cups of alcohol at a time. Maybe he got it from Russia? Why DID he drink? He was only 15 by appearance. Maybe he likes the taste? Also LEAVE RUSSIA ALONE! Now you see, dear readers, if this dipshit touches the topic of Soviet era in any of the Baltic countries I will personally rip her insides out and let her slowly bleed to death.  "U-uh, five feet exactly." You said as you took a sip of your water. You made sure it was water and not any alcoholic drink by sniffing it. It was safe and it tasted like water. "Your taller than me." Latvia said as he ate silently. This is how the entire dinner time went. Every once in a while, someone would try to give you some small talk but, you would go all shy on them. This was the occurrence when you kept your fangirl inside, you became a little uke girl; a Liechtenstein. ... It's called being a dipshit. You finished your food early; you auntie taught you to eat fast since you had a big family and as soon as you finished eating someone else would want to sit down and eat. So, you went to your room early, where you screamed into your pillows until you were sure that you'd lode your voice but, it was still there when you stopped screaming like the fangirl you are.

... For fucks sake. You fell asleep early too, eager for the next day to come.

So what happened in this chapter? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. It was long, pointless and boring. But, honestly, what did I expect? You've managed to insult every Estonian and French person, too, by the way, author. GG.

-Moonie