Your Love Is Finite
You decided to bake some cupcakes for your overworked husband. Surely nothing will go wrong!
₊✦Cookie Run: Kingdom | Pure Vanilla Cookie x Gn!Reader✦₊
From the first moment that Pure Vanilla Cookie uttered her name ever so gently to the moment you saw him gaze upon her with a loving smile, you knew you'd never compare to White Lily Cookie.
You shouldn't have cared, you really shouldn't have. Your marriage was arranged out of political necessity and the relationship born from it was nothing more than a polite gesture. And yet, whenever you saw those two together, you felt nothing but that same old ugly feeling brewing in your stomach; ready to spill out at any moment.
It wasn't fair.
Though it was hard to put a finger on what exactly your feelings towards Pure Vanilla Cookie were, it wasn't fair that his attention seemed more on his "friend" than you, his lawful spouse. Sure, he never was affectionate with her in the same way he was affectionate towards you — those gentle kisses, loving caresses and warm embraces were reserved for you and you only — but that didn't make it hurt any less. He could show you as much affection as he wanted to but it'd never make up for the hurt you felt from seeing the longing in his eyes whenever he was with White Lily Cookie.
Was it unfair to expect him to return your feelings? You certainly weren't denying it, but emotions were almost never logical.
Somewhere along your plan of getting the council off your back, you had fallen for Pure Vanilla Cookie. You wished for nothing more than for those very feelings to disappear; to melt away and wash down your body until the only proof of their existence was a small puddle on the ground, one that you could call in a servant to deal with and call it a day.
But no, you were stuck with the ache in your heart whenever that stupid smile wasn't directed towards you.
Not fair. Not fair. Not fair.
"Y- Your Majesty, the food!"
The sound of the chefs' panicked shouts and the scent of smoke were what you came back to, followed closely by the annoying, constant beeping of an alarm and the sensation of your dough soaking up the water droplets that fell on you.
It appears that you got so caught up in your thoughts that you failed to notice the cupcakes you were baking ended up burning to a crisp in the oven, which later caused a fire and activated the fire alarm, causing you to be soaked head to toe with water. How embarrassing, how unbecoming of a queen. You couldn't even do one thing right and you had the audacity to complain about Pure Vanilla Cookie choosing White Lily Cookie over you?
"Your Majesty..." one of the chefs called out, this time her worry not directed towards your burnt food but at you. "Are you alright? Were you harmed?"
Yes, you held back your bitter response. It wasn't as if Pure Vanilla Cookie would come running to coddle you if you said your feelings were hurt over being unable to bake properly. Honesty wouldn't help you here.
"...No. No I'm alright," you turned to face them with a smile. None of them looked like they believed you yet none of them looked like they wanted to confront you either.
"Your Majesty," another one began, their expression anxious, "How did your cupcakes turn out?"
You and them, every single chef in the kitchen with you right now, knew very well that your treats turned out horribly. That's what you thought so at least, but if it really was horrible then why was that chef asking you about it? They were the professionals here so was there... a chance that everything turned out fine?
You looked back in front of you, putting on an oven mitt with haste before you opened up the oven and took out the tray with your cupcakes on it.
And, as expected, they were burnt to a crisp.
Honestly, what were you even expecting? That you'd be some kind of prodigy despite having never cooked before until today? Or were you expecting some kind of divine intervention from the Witches themselves so your cupcakes would turn out good? Why did you get your stupid hopes up anyway? Sure the chefs were the professionals here and thus would know better than you, but they were bootlickers first and chefs second. Obviously they'd try to cheer you up despite how bad your cooking was.
Stupid, stupid, stupid...!
"Y- Your Majesty, they don't look t- that bad!"
...Right, right. You had to calm down. There were still Cookies with you which meant you had to keep your composure. You had already embarrassed yourself enough as their queen, you didn't need to embarrass yourself anymore than that. Not somewhere where others could see you, at least.
You looked to the side where you heard one of the chefs call out to you and sure enough there he was, looking nervously at your failed cupcakes.
"They don't?" you questioned. There weren't even any icings on them yet so if his words were true, you had to question his taste in food. Though you supposed it didn't matter as his stuttering gave away his actual thoughts.
"H- Here, let me have a taste!" He bravely yet anxiously snatched a burnt cupcake from the tray and threw it in his mouth with a big gulp.
As expected, his expression shifted to that of disgust.
"I- It's good, Your Majesty!"
You looked away. "Right..."
"Your Majesty! I hope you don't mind if I have a taste too!" another chef piped up as she grabbed a cupcake. Before long, her expression twisted into one of disgust as well. "It's r- really good..."
"Right..."
You might as well give up your duties as a queen and become a commoner if you couldn't even do something as simple as baking a cupcake for your husband.
"Your Majesty," began a voice that was both calm and gentle as the owner placed their hand on your shoulder. Your eyes soon met those of the head chef whose face held no expression. Strangely enough, it was a soothing sight. "Let's start decorating the cupcakes then wrap them up. Despite their quality, I'm sure His Majesty Pure Vanilla Cookie will appreciate the effort you put into your gift."
Appreciate it... that's right, Pure Vanilla Cookie was an extremely kind Cookie who was also a very loving husband despite the reason the two of you ended up together. At the very least, he'd say something sappy about how it's the thought that counts before taking a bite out of your burnt cupcakes, then with a dumb smile on his face, he'd no doubt tell you that he liked them.
Why did you even get so upset about this in the first place? Goodness, you were so stupid.
"But first, I suggest you dry yourself off with a towel and change into new clothes."
Oh right, you were soaked head to toe.
.
.
.
In front of you was the sight of White Lily Cookie holding a basket full of handmade sweets to Pure Vanilla Cookie who held one of them in his hands, looking at it with a sweet smile on his lips.
It didn't take you long to run off in tears and hastily dump your carefully wrapped gift box into the nearest trash.
What were you thinking?
What were you thinking?
There was no way you could've known that White Lily Cookie would make something of her own for Pure Vanilla Cookie today, but you should've known that it was foolish to think he'd accept the cupcakes you baked for him; especially ones that ended up burnt and looked so disgusting. The only reason some of the chefs even bothered to try it out was because the stability of their jobs lied in your hands. Pure Vanilla Cookie meanwhile was a king, you'd have to be stupid to believe that he'd try out what you baked for him in the first place— oh wait, you are stupid.
Besides, with him being so busy with his duties, why would you ever think that Pure Vanilla Cookie would choose your terrible cooking over White Lily Cookie's?
It's always her, always her.
Her her her her her...!
Why did you think you even had a chance?
Why did you think he'd choose you over her in the first place?
When would you even accept the fact that you were never ever going to compare to her and that it was pointless to even try; to bother?
Why did you stay, knowing that none of this mattered in the end? That he loved White Lily Cookie more than he did you? That he only loved White Lily Cookie?
Weren't you being a horrible spouse then for making him stay with you?
You claimed to love him and yet you couldn't even do the bare minimum of letting him go and be with the Cookie that he truly loves. You should divorce him already and return back to your kingdom where you should've done what your council— the Cookies who knew what was best for you told you what to do.
It wasn't as if you were forced to stay in this marriage in fear of war breaking out either. The Vanilla Kingdom had always been an ally to yours and the marriage's only purpose was to get the council off your back and stop being annoying. An action you now knew to be a mistake. A huge mistake.
It made sense then why Pure Vanilla Cookie preferred White Lily Cookie over you. Unlike you, she wasn't forcing him to stay with her. Unlike you, her insecurity didn't lead to her being controlling of every single little thing that Pure Vanilla Cookie did. Unlike you, she was not a crybaby who burst into tears at every little inconvenience and needed someone else to come comfort her.
Unlike you, she was a perfect fit to be a queen.
Unlike you.
Unlike you...
Just why couldn't you do anything right...?
.
.
.
"Oh? White Lily Cookie!" Pure Vanilla Cookie's eyes lit up with joy as his gaze landed on her form and flashed her a smile. "What brings you here to my garden?"
"Pure Vanilla Cookie," she greeted him back with a smile of her own and lightly lifted the basket full of store-bought desserts she was carrying. "I've been told that you were overworking yourself again, so I thought I should bring a gift for you to enjoy with your spouse."
A light laugh left his lips in response, "Really? How kind of you!" His hand dug into the basket and brought out the first sweet that he touched; a strawberry dipped in chocolate. Though it wasn't one of his favourites, he was already looking forward to the way you'd timidly feed these to him as well as the other sweets that were inside the basket.
Just the thought of it alone was enough to get his heart to flutter and widen the smile already on his face.
The conversation went on, moving onto a few different subjects before White Lily Cookie had to take her leave. With one last wave and a smile, Pure Vanilla Cookie turned to head back inside his castle; impatient to share the sweets White Lily Cookie bought for the two of you with you.
But as he was on his way towards the castle, a glimpse of something in a nearby trash can standing by the path caught his eye. Though a closer look made it clear that glimpse was an understatement as the thing that caught his eye was a box that took up a good portion of the trash can. He took that as a sign that he should order every trash can in the garden to be replaced by bigger ones, but something about this situation didn't sit right with him.
He stepped closer, the details of the box even clearer now. It was painted in his favourite colour and wrapped up in ribbons that he immediately noted to be your favourite colour. Cute, but the sight now brought with it feelings of anxiety and Pure Vanilla Cookie's mind churned and churned with the implications of what this meant.
Without hesitation, he scooped the box up from the trash can that was otherwise empty and held it under his arm. He dropped the basket by the kitchen as soon as he was inside his castle before heading up, not to his shared bedroom with you, but to his office where he knew no one would disturb him for a while.
He placed the box down on the table and sat down with a sigh. If the box was what he thought it was, then why did he find it in the trash? Part of him feared opening the box as it could confirm his suspicions, but what other choice did he have? Ignoring the box or throwing it away certainly wouldn't help, if anything that might make the situation even worse.
And so with a deep breath to prepare himself, he opened the box.
Inside was a mess of icing and a sea of burnt dough, likely inedible.
He knew of only one Cookie who was so much of a perfectionist that they'd throw away all the effort they spent on their gift on a whim while in tears. This wasn't the first time after all, but it was the first time where Pure Vanilla Cookie was the presumed recipient.
"Oh, my bluebird..."
He grabbed a handful of the burnt crumbs, uncaring of the mess he'd cause, and placed them in his mouth without hesitation.
The crumbs were hard and unpleasantly bitter, just having them in his mouth made him feel nauseous.
In contrast, the icing was soothingly sweet; the one saving grace to whatever it was that he was eating.
But...
He grabbed another handful of the crumbs, this time wiping away as much of the icing as possible before throwing them in his mouth. Then he did it again.
Then again.
And again.
The bitter taste filled his mouth.
The hard crumbs dragged down his throat almost painfully, some big enough to make him feel like he was choking.
The contents of his stomach swirled and churned.
And yet, he doubted that any of the discomfort he was feeling could ever compare to the anguish you must've felt when you made these.
That same anguish that you must undoubtedly be feeling now.
Something wet fell onto his hand, soaking up his dough.
Another one followed.
Before long, all that remained in the box was the icing that the crumbs came with. His hands were a mess of icing, crumbs and tears.
"Bluebird..." the nickname barely left his lips in a meek whisper, "why won't you open up to me?"
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