Warnings: Death, cursing, normal hunger games warnings, and brief mention of suicide.
Nothing about Y/N ever screamed ordinary to Johanna—you were every bit exciting and amazing from the day she met you until the day Snow stole you away. You were the kind of summer sunshine that brightened everyone you met in Seven, and Johanna was far from that. She was rigid and harsh, like salt into a wound. And for some reason, you were glued to her side.
“Joooooooooooo—” You drag out the nickname, throwing yourself across the lounge in the living room. You were going crazy watching her get ready for the tour, bored out of your mind—but you were here. Hardly left this house since Johanna came home.
She hmmms, turning in your direction and smiling as she spots your smile—you were the only reason she had left to smile. The Games had taken just about everything from her, but as you pout and reach out for her. Johanna is a fool for you, an absolute idiot. The cameras would be here shortly, but you did more than preoccupy her—you kept her sane.
“Yes Y/N?” You continue to reach out, gesturing her close and watch as she finally lets her resolve call and gives in. Something about how your palm melts around her fingers as she lets you pull her close, warmly smiling throughout the entire motion. That feeling just gives her a sense of belonging, of importance—that she wouldn’t trade for anything else.
“Is there something you need?” You feel the hum of her breath as she lays spooned against your chest. You know she’s smiling, even if you can’t see it.
“Nothing more than this.”
.
.
.
Johanna had walked into Victor’s Village like it was any other day, the Games had ended—her tributes dead, and the idea of holding you was just about the only thing on her mind.
First, she imagined herself walking in and you’re there to greet her. You don’t even wait for her to toss away her things before you have embraced her close. Your face buried in her shoulder, everything would slip through her fingers until they were free enough to hold you back.
Second, by the time you let go—Johanna would be relieved, the hate would melt away and that would be enough. You would smile at her, not happy or sad—but that soft and warm smile because you knew what she felt. Knew what she had seen.
Third, you would lead her to the living room where fresh tea and bread would be waiting. A soft spreadable cheese still cool, because you wanted everything to be perfect.
Fourth, she’d sit there all night with you in her arms. Trying to imagine anyone else, and unable—knowing that you were the one made for her. A perfect incarnation of sunshine, and even when she burdened you with her Games. You were always there when she woke up in the morning.
Five, every year was the same thing… Johanna liked that she knew what to expect from you at every turn. The simplicity of knowing where your head is at. It made up for the unpredictability of the Games themselves. Took her far away from those thoughts.
Si-, the door is ajar—Johanna hesitates on the porch, something about the rush of blood to her head makes the world sit sideways. On edge. Like she’s trying to walk through the portal.
You never leave the door open.
Seven, she finds the courage to place her hand against the rough edge of the door. One slip and her fingers would be splintered, it was as if someone had forced their way in. Breaking the trim. There is no rush of fresh bread, or sweet candles you burned so often. There was no you at all. Just a long empty hall. One that is too quiet.
Ei-eight, Johanna knows what’s coming before she even turns the corner… something about the thick metallic smell had a mist already formed in her eyes. She couldn’t even feel her hands that guided her through the home, but there you were.
Nine. She stares at the note as if it could burst into flames, willing it to—Snow. It was easy to decipher the meaning. She got nine years with Y/N. Her perfect match. And Snow gave her nine chances to accept his offer, and she refused them all. Too loyal to her Y/N…
Johanna saw her fair share of dead bodies in the arena, but when the note slips out of her fingers. Her body had gone into autopilot, rushing your form that is hidden by the coffee table.
“Y/N!” Her knees ache as they hit hardwood, the heavy pound of her heart is all she hears as she tries to find a pulse. To will your heart into a steady beat, but it is already gone. And all Johanna could do was sit there and know. “Please don’t-” The words broke off, because they didn’t matter.
You were already gone.
Johanna sat there for the rest of the night, wishing for any sign of life. She could barely stand it when the peacekeepers finally came for your body.
The rumors said you did it to yourself, downed a bottle of pills, but Johanna knew better than that. Knew the edge to her voice was warranted as she tried to silence ever lie, because you wouldn’t.
You didn’t.
Snow just made it seem like you did. That Johanna had finally told you one too many stories, put one too many burdens on you.
She had nine chances, and chose you all nine times… and inadvertently, ended it all.
.
.
.
In District Thirteen, Johanna still found herself seeing you as she did in the Capitol. You were smiling again, the morphine induced visions seemed more joyous than those made by torture. You laid with her, and smiled—made the worst of the dreams disappear.
Even when the morphine wore off, you were still there and Johanna appreciated the memories. Sometimes, if she let herself forget about your death—she would almost believe you were still alive. That it was really you watching over her. Just like you promised you would.
Watching the wedding, something in Johanna felt emptier wondering if she would have married you? She would have asked eventually, no one got her the way you did. You knew when she was upset, or sad, or happy by the smallest twitch in her expression.
Would you wear a dress? Would it be white? Would you kiss her in front of no one, with no family or would your friends be there? Would you have lived through the games? The revolution?
Katniss is next to her, but Johanna’s mind is far off—wondering where you are. How you are? Did you finally figure out what’s after death? Will you still be waiting for her?
“Her name was Y/N…” It was unprovoked, but it was the first time Johanna had managed to speak your name out loud. She couldn’t bare to say a syllable after you died, it was like sending shockwaves through her whole body. Every. Single. Time.
“What?”
“The girl I love. Her name is Y/N.” Johanna briefly sees a flash of your eyes from memory, the brightness shining through even though it is only a thought.
Katniss could hear the echo of what Johanna had said during the Quell: “There’s no one left I love.”
“Snow killed her a year after I won. She was just about the only person I cared about, someone ought to know that much.” She pauses, the words caught in her throat as she looks over at Katniss.
Mary stood with her ladies in waiting as she watched Francis propose to you. She could not believe that Francis would choose you - a mere commoner - over her - a queen. The dark haired queen studied you for a moment. You had long hair that was lighter than hers and brighter eyes that were considered rare. With a huff, Mary turned away storming off to her chambers to hide for Lord knows how long.
Y/N smiled softly as she pulled away from the kiss before looking up at Francis with nothing but adoration. He had chosen you, and you felt so lucky to call him your future husband.
The Spider King and the Butterfly Princess - Sebastian de Poitiers
001. the spider king and the butterfly princess
PAIRING; Sebastian de Poitiers x Reader
REQUEST; y/n and bash were childhood best friends and randomly reunite and realize they love each other.
DATE; March 24th, 2019
WORD COUNT; 4877
WARNING; kissing, i think thats it. but as always let me know if i missed something!
A/N; this is absolute shit. i can't believe its almost been three years since i've written this. seems much longer tbh. but got into reign again and thought might as well post this on here.
TRAILER; in which the italian princess finds one bastard to have grown up a little too nicely for her choosing.
REQUESTED BY; anon
-
Playing chess in a moving carriage was much more difficult than what most expected. The pieces would frequently fall over and much to Y/N's displeasure, would fall down onto the floor. Thanks to Y/N's corset, getting the chessmen was annoying and hurt plenty. And just to make matters worse, her playmate and rather impatient younger brother would drum his fingers on the edge of his seat every time it took her longer than he wanted.
Now, for the fifth time, the King had fallen onto the floor and the marble had shattered. Cursing under her own breath, Y/N asked for the driver to stop for a second. Obeying her quickly, Y/N felt the carriage rest to a stop which gave her time to console her tearful brother. Y/N had wondered when he had become such a crybaby. She had never seen him cry in front of her parents, maybe Y/N shouldn't be as nice to him as she wanted too.
"Louis," Y/N pleaded grabbing his thin ankle, "Please stop crying. You'll wake up Louise." Y/N said nodding over to his twin and picking up some of the broken rock. Why Y/N's parents had named them almost the same name Y/N would never know. It was already bad enough for them to look exactly the same, only one with longer hair and a naturally scrunched up nose.
Louis sniffled and rubbed his nose. He loved his twin dearly but for some reason he choose to express that emotion in evil ways. Such as rubbing his nose boogies on Louise's face. She woke up with a start and gave her brother a glare for waking her from her slumber. Y/N silently groaned, she knew exactly what was going to happen and couldn't wait to get to the castle despite what was going to happen there. Louis willing laughed at her with a pointed finger before rubbing his disgusting antics in her face. With a trembling lip and big eyes she started to sob into Y/N's shoulder.
"Please continue, Bulstrode! I apologize for stopping so suddenly but we must hurry if we are going to get to the French Court before sundown." Y/N said before she reached out towards her brother who immediately shied away from her. "Relax, I just want your hanky. I'm not going to hit you, even if you deserve it."
Louis grinned cheekily at her, flashing his missing front teeth at her. Sometimes she hated that he was so young... and so adorable. He handed the cloth to her giving her leeway to wipe the gross mixture off of her sister's chubby cheeks. "There," Y/N said smiling down at her sister who still had tears rolling down but no more hiccups coming from her lips, "All better."
After that horrible catastrophe, the twins decided to aggravate their older sister by constantly whining about the trip taking to long and the cliche 'Are we there yet?' or 'Why did we have to come?'
Now, Louise had decided to almost launch her body out of the carriage. Half of her body was dangling through the window as she stared at the massive castle in front of her. "Louise!" Y/N shrieked grabbing her body and pulling it down, "Get down from there now! We are seconds away from the castle. Don't you dare misbehave and upset Mother and Father! You two are incredibly lucky I offered to come and take care of you both. Mother had wanted Lucy to come-"
"No!" The both shouted in union. Lucy was the twins governess, she was a very very old woman with very very old customs. Lucy may be the only one able to keep them both in line but she also done so by fear and torture, two things Y/N did not agree with.
Y/N raised an eyebrow, "Good. So I am guessing I won't have to send Mother and Father a letter asking to send Lucy over?"
They both shook their heads quickly. Y/N sighed in relief, she didn't like Lucy much either. After all, no one liked their Mother's spy breathing down their necks.
"I've never seen a woman look so scary in my life."
Y/N turned around so fast she felt her neck crack. Her eyes landed on a blonde haired man whose grin on his face was horribly contagious. "You obviously haven't met your Mother then."
Francis rolled his eyes and opened the carriage door, "You are just as annoying as I remembered."
"Good, then I am doing my job. Louise, Louis, this is Francis Valois, the Dauphin of France." Francis raised an eyebrow when Y/N announced their names, he had a hint of a smile on his face. Y/N knew how amusing he found their names but had chosen not to say anything.
Louise giggled silently and whispered something to Louis. He then smirked and looked between the two with mirth in his eyes. Y/N knew that look and couldn't help but feel her stomach drop. They were planning to do something that would make Y/N furious. It seemed Francis realized that too and quickly told the children that a maid would take them to their rooms where tons and tons of pastries were waiting to be eaten. They left quickly after that but, of course, not leaving before they could whisper something in Francis' ear.
Francis helped Y/N out of the carriage and decided to take a walk around the grounds with her. "What did my siblings say?" Y/N asked, "I saw your face and don't worry whatever their threat is won't happen. One time, Louis had told one of the maids that if she didn't leave to get him a strawberry tart immediately he would put spiders in her bed but-"
"It wasn't anything like that." Francis said laughing, "Although, their presence may bring some happiness to the castle. Louise had asked me if I was going to marry you. But I had told her that you already belonged to someone else."
Y/N grimaced with disgust, she quickly took her linked arm off of Francis'. Y/N and the blonde haired man had known each other for a very long time. He had grown handsome but she could never think of him anything other than the five year old who had peed on her for revenge when she had shoved a frog in his face. Besides, she had had a crush on his brother when she was younger. Of course, the feelings had disappeared now. But Francis didn't know that and she knew he would do anything in his power to poke fun of her past.
Deciding her best option would be to play dumb she said, "I haven't been betrothed yet, Francis."
"Don't play dumb it doesn't suit you. Don't worry Bash already knows."
Y/N felt her blood run cold as her stomach seemed sunk into itself. All she felt was absolute horror. Her mind was running through possible situations with each one seeming to get increasingly worse. However, as soon as the feeling came it had fluttered away and had been replaced by a new feeling. Embarrassment. White hot blood rushed up through her skin and seeped into the few uncovered parts of her body. Now more than ever she had wished she hadn't come to France.
She sat quietly onto the grass overlooking the lake, "You," Y/N said after a while as she pointed an accusing finger at a smirking Francis, "You and my horrid siblings are going to be the death of me someday and I will make you regret it."
"Well," Francis said sitting down next to her, "Today is not that day."
Y/N sighed and let her back fall back into the green, she felt absolutely exhausted. Everything was just too much. The week she had been too much. She just wanted to sleep forever and never have to wake up and face Sebastian. Y/N heard Francis lay down next to her but she decided not to open her eyes. They were much to heavy to open up and she was quite mad at him. She knew she would get back at him somehow. After all, she was Italian and Italians are great at revenge.
-
It had been a while since the L/Ns had visited the French Court. Y/N's Mother had been reluctant to go back once Queen Catherine and King Henry had signed Francis off to another Princess. She remembered the feeling of devastation that had went through her when she had found out that they may never go back. Francis had been her very best friend back then and Y/N supposed she felt that he still was even if they had lost contact over the years. He still knew her the best out of anyone.
Y/N was quite thankful for how things turned out. Since her Mother and Father had thought the King and Queen of France were going to sign an arranged marriage with them, they had wasted too much precious time and had failed to secure a Prince for Y/N to marry. She really didn't want to marry some stuck up man who only wanted her so he could progress the family lineage.
Y/N didn't really want to marry, unless it was for love. But she knew that wouldn't happen. After all, she was a Princess and Princesses have duties to take care of.
If only Bash had been Queen Catherine's child. Y/N wouldn't have wanted him to be the Dauphine, Francis was perfect for the job. Besides, she didn't want to rule France. Becoming the future ruler of Italy was already stressful enough. She had hundreds of people's lives at her hands and the Pope was constantly breathing down her neck. Sometimes, she wished she were a commoner.
The water swished through her body as she cleaned herself in the warmth of the bath. But Commoners wouldn't have this luxury, she reminded herself. Despite what she had thought previously, she didn't want to be one anymore.
"Your highness?" Someone called from the end of the room. Looking a bit awkward standing there was a guard. He looked uneasy like he wished he could be anywhere but here, however, if he didn't do whatever he had to do someone would kill him. Y/N decided that was probably right. They were in France. "Someone is here to see you."
Y/N raised an eyebrow, did it look like she was in appropriate attire to talk to someone right now? "Who is it?"
"Your sister and brother, Madame."
"Oh," Y/N said turning around towards the bath, "Send them in." Y/N heard them before she saw them, she could hear little footsteps and loud giggles probably before the entered the room.
As the finally reached Y/N's earshot, she heard, "You're turning into a girl, Louise."
"Well, I would hope so, Louis. After all, she is a girl."
Louis huffed from next to her and leaned against the wooden bathtub. His hand reached towards the water but Y/N's hands smacked it away before it could do any damage. "What was that for?" he cried out.
"What do you have in your hand?" Y/N said easily. She knew Louis well enough to know he wouldn't reach into her tub unless it was for a prank. Louis hated water. He loathed it so much he had refused to take baths for a month. Mother and Father hadn't cared until the day before the annual ball. He stunk like a deceased body soaked in acid and looked like some of the criminals Y/N had seen in the jail cells in Rome.
Louis pursed his lips silently and made eye contact with Louise who nodded sadly. She always felt bad after she caught them in the middle of a prank, the sparkle in their eyes disappeared into a lifeless look. But then the guilt would wash away before she could dawn on the subject more.
Handing her a wooden toy, Y/N raised her eyebrows. The thing was supposed to be a spider and it would have looked like a spider if it were painted right. It was midnight black with a red frown that was drawn in a squiggly line like the black line on charlie's brown's famous yellow shirt. The eyes and eyebrows were the same color but it was what on top of it's head that confused Y/N. Right in the center was a mop of yellow yarn that curled down past the body and on top of the tendrils was a crown. Y/N guessed Louis and Louise had made the toy themselves. It looked like an exact replica of a spider in a story Y/N had made up.
The Spider King and the Butterfly Princess
The story was basically a re-telling of Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, except they were bugs and Y/N had decided not to mention anything about their deaths and had instead ended the story with the cliche, 'and they lived Happily Ever After.'
Surprisingly, they had both eaten the story up with greedy hands.
"Is this the Spider King?" Y/N asked turning the toy delicately in her hand, "You were just going to let him die so you could prank me?"
Louis looked a little ashamed at her chancing but Louise looked anything but ashamed, she looked furious. "You told me you grabbed the other spider, Louis!"
Y/N groaned and lifted her hand to massage her scalp, this was more stressful that she had accounted for. Deciding it was best to get out before something happened between them, Y/N grabbed a towel from the chair next to her and wrapped it around her body. "Hey!" Y/N said snapping their attention back to Y/N who was leaving the bathroom and walking into her room, "Why did you guys come visit me? You can come in here whenever you like. I'll tell the guards to just immediately let you both in."
Y/N froze after she finished her last sentence. There standing in the center of the room was a man, his back had been turned but at the sound of her voice he spun around. At the sight of his eyes she suddenly felt cool. The atmosphere in the room had gotten cooler somehow, the floor had turned into grainy sand and she felt sea spray tickle her face. His eyes were the beach, they were the freezing waves in Italy and the warm waters in Greece.
She felt seasick.
"Hello, Sebastian." Y/N said with a hint of a smile on her face. He smiled back at her and Y/N remembered she was only wearing a towel. "Do you mind, I have to get dressed."
"Oh!" He said quickly, "Yes, yes, of course. I'll just leave!"
"No! I mean, you don't have to leave. I have my clothes already behind the curtain." [ a/n; what's the thing they used to get dressed behind? it was sort of like a wall but it would fold up. it was in the animated cinderella movie. if you know what i am talking about please comment so i can replace it with curtain. ] Y/N had realized what she had said too late. Squeezing her eyes shut tightly in embarrassment she made her way into the corner. Could she have been anymore awkward? No wonder he found out about her crush when she was younger. She made it so incredibly obvious.
At least she didn't like him anymore. Y/N did have to admit he was quite handsome. But he wasn't her type. Francis was more her type but she could never like him like that.
"How have you been?" Y/N heard Sebastian ask from her room.
Y/N laughed quietly, Sebastian had always been the one to make small talk in the beginning before asking interesting questions that could get Y/N to second guess her entire life style within seconds, "I haven't seen you in 15 years and you ask me 'how have you been?'"
"You were the one demanded I get out then stay."
"Because! I was practically naked and you just stood there."
"I did not just stand there."
A tiny "oh no," left Y/n's lips as she tried again and again to fasten the buttons on her back. The slippery things would make Y/N lose her grip on them every time she tried to button them. Getting more and more frustrated as time flew by. Finally, red face and left with no patience she stomped her foot on the wood and blew out a breath of air.
"Y/N? Are you alright?" Bash asked. Y/N had forgotten he was still there. Wondering if her siblings were still in the room and up to help, she poked her head around the wall. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing. Are my siblings still here?" At the sight of his head shaking no, Y/N placed her forehead against the edge of the curtain. Y/N really didn't want to try again, her arms ached from reaching back there for so long and she knew no matter how hard she tried she wouldn't be able to get it in the stupid hole. She had gotten one on within the past ten minutes. She had absolutely no more patience. Hell, she would rather walk around with the back of her dress undone then try again.
But she hated asking for help. She knew she could really do it if she wanted too. But buttoning a dress wasn't worth twenty minutes of her time. Neither was relentless teasing from Sebastian. However, Y/N didn't know Sebastian anymore. Maybe he changed and wasn't as immature as before.
"Bash," Y/N tried, straightening the collar of her dress. "Do you mind helping me with something real quick." Y/N heard the chair squeak from the loss of his weight as she stepped out of the curtain. "Could you button this for me?" Y/N asked and turned her back to him so he could finish her task.
"You really haven't changed," Bash said as he moved Y/N's hair out of the way. Y/N was having trouble attempting to not show a reaction to his touch. But she couldn't keep in the shiver that ran down her back as his fingers brushed her neck.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Y/N had forgotten all about what he made her feel like which made her wonder if he really caused her to feel like this or if she had thought she had.
"You still can't dress yourself, Y/N. How long is it going to take you to learn a different skill without your maids?"
Y/N scoffed but her brow was furrowed with worry, "You are one to talk, Bash. Don't act like you haven't had the same treatment all of you life."
"I never said I didn't." Y/N felt his fingers brush against her neck again but she felt nothing. She had been right earlier, "There all finished."
Y/N turned around with a smile, "Thank you."
"Of course," he said walking over to the chair to grab his coat, "It's good to have you back. Things haven't been the same since you left."
-
The wind rustled through her hair as the horse galloped through the grounds. Her heart beat harder and harder as her eyelids slowly closed shut, giving all of her trust in the animal under her.
Bash was in front of her somewhere, she didn't know nor care. Besides meeting him at the stables every day, she hadn't seen him since the button situation. Y/N liked to pretend that they both had been busy, but she knew that wasn't the case.
She had been avoiding him for a while. It had been a cowardly and just down right rude thing to do but Y/N didn't know how else to sort out her feelings. It was a little ridiculous how easily she had grown to like him. Especially when she had tried so hard to make herself not like him. All he had to do was say a few things and have his hand graze her skin a bit before he had her wrapped around his pinky finger.
Her Mother would not approve at all.
But she knew she sneaking out with him at night to go riding was much worse.
"I had forgotten how much a horrible rider you were, princess."
Y/N rolled her eyes at him trying not to let the fact that he had called her princess effect her. "I had forgotten how much of a cox-comb you are. Besides, it's not like you have forgotten, Sebastian. You just rode with me yesterday," [ a/n; a cox comb is a medieval insult that means a vain, foppish person. ]
Bash laughed at her insult and decided to ignore the last part, "I haven't heard that one in a while. God, you're such a goody-goody."
"Don't use God's name in vain."
Bash gave her a look, "You are just proving my point."
Y/N scoffed and went to push him off his horse when he slowed his horse down to a stop, "Why are we stopping, Sebastian."
"Do you recognize this place?"
Y/N raised an eyebrow and scanned the area around her. They seemed to be in some kind of ruin near the Ocean Bluffs. Gently dismounting her horse, she gave the reins to Bash who had done the same earlier. She walked around the place with a blush and a small smile. She couldn't believe he had remembered. This place held so many memories she held close to her heart. She had her very first kiss here. Stupid, Francis had dared Y/N to kiss a French Nobel's son. It was the first place Y/N, Francis, and Bash had played hide and seek. Then, Mary had come along and the group had split apart. Francis went along to play with Mary and Y/n and Bash would come here. Sometimes, they would invite other children to come play with them but it was mostly just the two of them.
"You have this far-away look on your face. I'm guessing you do remember then?"
Y/N turned around to look at Sebastian with a childish smile on her face, "How could I forget?" She walked over to a stone wall, letting her hand brush over the edge.
It was almost bittersweet, looking around and having flashbacks of her childhood. She missed it so much. There was a tug at her heart that got worse every time she remembered some ridiculous memory that probably never effected her in the slightest. As her fingers left the stone she felt a sense of longing, a longing to be back in her childhood where everything was simple and she didn't have to worry about her country or her siblings or the future.
No one liked growing up. But it seemed Y/N had grown up too fast.
She remembered looking forward to her birthday every year. Her parents would throw a grand party every year to celebrate her living another year. Thinking back on it, Y/N thought the parties were a bit deceiving. They should be celebrating the memories she had made and how she had enjoyed life, not the increasing stress she was receiving and her ever decreasing time until the throne was hers.
Soon, she was almost in tears. Bash seemed to have noticed because he panicked and quickly rushed towards her. "No, no, don't cry. I didn't bring you here to cry..."
Y/N sniffled as he brought her into a hug. She sighed and gripped his overcoat. All she seemed to do was embarrass herself around him.
"Why did you bring me here?" Y/N asked looking up. Her lip wobbled as she looked up at him, trying very hard not let a fresh layer of tears run down her cheeks.
A flash of guilt crossed his face as he looked away, it almost seemed like he was trying to hide something. Y/N didn't notice though, she was too busy worrying about his answer.
"Why are you crying?"
"I asked you first," she whispered, leaning out of his embrace so she could wipe her tears, "Answer me, please."
"I just felt like it." Y/N gave him a hard look, she didn't believe him in the slightest and it hurt to think that he was lying right to her face. Her jaw clenched as she looked away, but she chose not to say anything. "Why are you crying?"
An answer bit harshly on her tongue but wouldn't release. She didn't want to say it, not now, not yet. They had been having such a great time and now she was going to ruin it with her Mother's words. She knew Bash had heard them before, after all they had been said right to his Father's face. But she still couldn't believe he would just lie, maybe he had changed. "Italian people choose to show their emotions instead of locking it up like you French people do." She said, her words sounding harsher and harsher as the sentence went on. She almost regretted saying it but decided against it.
Y/N watched his eyebrows furrow with worry, she knew he remembered which only made her feel more sick to her stomach. Her eyes lowered to the ground as she stepped away from him. "Y/N," he started with his arm stretched out towards her.
"No," she stepped away from him again and swatted his hands out of her reach, "Just-Just leave me alone."
His jaw clenched once again and he sighed as he thrust his hands into his hair out of frustration, "Fine, I'll leave you alone after you tell me whats wrong."
A whimper left Y/N's lips as she thought over what she could say, 'I'm mad because I love you and you'll never love me. But I'm pretending I'm mad because you lied to my face.' No, that wouldn't work. So instead of saying anything Y/N hugged her waist and stared out at the waves for a while. Her curled hair tickled her cheeks as she stared out. Her eyelids, unbeknownst to Sebastian, were blinking tears away. She hated herself for not being able to tell him but she hated Sebastian more for being so oblivious to her feelings.
Taking in a deep but shaky breath, she let a few tears slip past her eyes and onto her cheeks. She knew in the back of her mind what she needed to do which only made her more terrified. Her stomach was a flurry of butterflies and she felt dizzy with nerves.
"I'll tell you what's wrong when you tell me why you brought me here," Y/N whispered so quietly she almost jumped when Sebastian finally replied back.
He patted the grass next to her, signaling her to sit next to him. He seemed to be preparing himself for something Y/N noticed, as she felt the wetness of the grass seep into her dress. She played with her fingers for a while as she waited for a response. She only looked up when he started to talk, "I just," he hesitated for a moment and turned away with a queasy look on his face, Y/N wondered if he was going to throw up, "I thought it would be a good enough time as ever to confess something to you."
Heat rushed up to Y/N's face, her heartbeat racing as her mind went straight to the one thing she was hoping to hear, "Well, you see, ever since I was little my Mother always adored you and well-"
"Yes?"
"That has nothing to do with it actually. I was just stalling. Umm, Y/N, I was hoping that we could put all of our childhood difficulties behind us and maybe start over. I have talked to your Father some. It may be the reason on why you came here instead of Sweden, but I would like to chort you."
Y/N smiled, her cheeks flushing with pleasure as her eyes strayed to the grass flowing in the wind. It could not have been a more perfect day. "I'd like that."
You've just arrived at the castle with Mary and her Ladies. You've said hello to everyone and gotten settled in your chambers. It's a beautiful day outside and you decide to explore the castle grounds. You're on your way out the door when something stops you. It's Francis, standing in the in the hallway, blocking the door. He's talking to a young women about your age, she's very beautiful....and seemingly determined in more ways than one. You make your way up to them, but they fail to notice you standing there.
You: (clearing your throat)
They finally look at you.
You: Excuse me I just wanted to go for a walk outside, but it seems my way has been blocked.
Francis: We're sorry Y/N? Do forgive us.
You: Quite alright.
Francis: Y/N this is Natalia, she's one of my sister's ladies.
You: Nice to meet you Natalia.
Natalia: Nice to meet you too.
There's a long pause.
You: If you don't mind I'll just continue on my way.
They step aside and you continue on.
Later than afternoon. You're in your chambers reading a book when your page opens the door.
Page: The dauphin, my lady.
You: Francis? What are you doing here?
Francis: I wanted to talk to you?
You: (to your page) Leave us.
Francis: I wanted to explain....
You: Francis there's no need. Your personal life is none of my business.
Francis: I still think I owe you an explanation.
You: I'm not the one you should be talking to.
Francis: I've never slept with her.
You: I'm not Mary, Francis? I'm not naive and foolish enough to believe that two people in an arranged marriage will fall in love simply because they are engaged. I'm also not foolish to believe that a man will stay faithful just because he is married.
Francis: You understand?
You: Understand what?
Francis: Love is irrelevant to people like us.
You: Do you truly believe that?
Francis: I don't know.
You: I don't and I can see in your eyes you don't either.
Setting: It's the morning after your "wedding" night. The sun is beaming into the room, there's peace in the moment as you wake up in each others arms.
Prelude: You and Francis secretly snuck away from the castle and eloped at a catholic church nearby. Francis went on a hunting trip with Bash a few days before, while you "went into town" yesterday. You met up with each other at a midway point which just happened to be less than half a mile to the church as Francis and Bash were headed back to the castle. Bash continued on while you and Francis carried with your plan to get married. You were married in no less than five minutes. You both signed your marriage contract, said your vows, were declared married, and were back at the castle before sun down. You both entered the castle from different entry ways, so no one would suspect anything.
You open your eyes and take a deep breath before rolling over to see Francis smiling as he stares at you.
You: Francis.
Francis: Good Morning Wife.
You: Good Morning.
He smiles and then kisses you.
Francis: I was thinking, maybe we don't have to tell anybody about this right away.
He starts kissing your neck.
You: Francis? We have to.
Francis: Not yet, we don't have to tell them yet.
You: And when would be tell them exactly?
Francis: When the time is right.
Kiss you
You: And when would that be?
Francis: Soon. I want to enjoy this a little longer before we have to bring the rest of the world into it.
You: Hmm, yes it would be nice to enjoy this a little longer.
Bar hopping was necessarily something that you did often. You found yourself in straight bars less often than that. There wasn’t really much of a party there, but tonight you wanted to drink without so much chaos surrounding you. You didn’t necessarily want to be alone, but you wanted to enjoy some quieter time. Sadly, there was a pest in between you and enjoying that time tonight.
“Hey baby.” You turned your head to see a sleazy looking guy standing next to you. You gave him an unimpressed look and then turned back to your drink. You weren’t sure what part of you was sending this guy the vibe that you were approachable for him, but he shouldn’t have been reading into it. “Hey pretty baby, wanna come home with me?”
“No, but I think you should go home,” you said and he laughed.
“She’s a funny one. Look, the pretty lady’s got jokes,” he said loudly. He was drawing quite a bit of attention to the two of you. You tried to hide your face a bit and he was about to say something else, when he got cut off.
“You’ve got about fifteen seconds to get the hell away from my girlfriend.” A woman said and you looked up to see soccer legend Hope Solo standing behind him. He turned around and she made herself look bigger. “Scratch that, five... four... three.. two... one...”
“Sorry ma’am,” he said as he ran off. You smiled at her and wordlessly offered her the seat next to you.
“Thank you for that, he was persistent,” you said and Hope called the bartender over. “Put it on my tab.”
“Two beers,” Hope said to him before sliding him a card. It was fancy, much fancier than yours. “I’m Hope.”
“Y/n,” you said as you shook her hand. “Do you make a habit of hanging around bars, saving damsels from assholes?”
“Nope, just you. I’ve seen him before though. He always leaves alone and covered in some other woman’s vodka cranberry,” Hope said and you chuckled at the thought. The bartender set your drinks down in front of you and Hope did a cheers. “Are you from around here?”
“Nope, I just moved for work,” you said and Hope nodded.
“Where are you from?” Hope asked curiously.
“Harrison, New Jersey, but I technically came here from Michigan,” you said and Hope nodded. “How about you?”
“Washington born and raised,” Hope said proudly. “What do you do for work?”
“Basketball,” you said and Hope nodded. The two of you talked about sports and being an athlete until the bar closed.
“Can I walk you to a cab?” Hope asked and you nodded. You walked beside her and she grabbed your hand. She waved a cab for you and the two of you stood next to each other for a moment just enjoying the little moment. Hope put her number in your phone and you gave her a quick kiss with the promise of seeing her again. “Bye.”
“I’ll see you later, maybe you can save me from another boring night,” you said and Hope bit her lip as she waved at you. It had taken you about 10 minutes before you finally broke and sent Hope a text to meet you for lunch the next day somewhere.
You're walking slowly threw the castle gardens, trying to clear your head yet gather your thoughts. You had just come from the throne room where King Henry made an important announcement and your not sure what you should do or how to feel about it.
Francis: Y/N?
You: Francis?
He quickly catches up with you.
You: I though you'd be celebrating with Mary and the others
Francis: You left the throne room so quickly I was worried.
You: I needed some fresh air.
Francis: I also saw the look on you face.
(You stare at him for a second then reluctantly you begin)
You: My reaction to your father's announcement was unexpected...I always knew someday he was going to announce your wedding to Mary. I just imagined, maybe even expected myself to be happy and supportive like everyone else...Instead I find myself terrified. Terrified of losing something, having to let it go and being all but forgotten.
Francis: You're not going to lose Mary, she would never forget about you.
You: I wasn't talking about Mary...Francis Valois you are a diamond in the rough, I can see why all the girls love you...Bash is right, I fell in love with a man I can never have and I'm paying the price for it.
Francis: Y/N?
You: I won't say a word to Mary, I'll find an appropriate suitor as soon as possible.
I haven’t updated the fandoms and characters I write/create for in a while so here we go! (** next to characters I’m super keen to write for right now)
The 100 **
- All characters over the age of consent (16)
Chronicles of Narnia
- Peter Pevensie **
- Edmund Pevensie **
- Prince Caspian **
- Eustace Scrub
- Susan Pevensie **
- Lucy Pevensie
All characters are assumed and written to be over the age of consent
Skam
- All characters except William’s gross brother
Harry Potter
- All characters except Tom Riddle/Voldemort and fem!reader x Albus Dumbledore
Fantastic Beasts and where to Find them
- All characters
X-men/MCU
- All characters over the age of consent
Umbrella Academy
- All characters over the age of consent BUT any Luther x reader fics which include scenes of intimacy will have him be fully human because anything else feels icky and like bea***lity.
Reign
- Mary Queen of Scots
- Francis Valois
- Claude Valois
- Sebastian de Pontier ‘Bash’ **
- Leith Bayard
- Greer **
- Gideon Blackburn
- Louis Conde **
- Charles XI Valois
The Hunger Games
- Katniss Everdeen
- Peeta Mellark
- Johanna Mason
- Finnick Odair **
- Haymitch Abernathy
And now: Deadly Class!
- Marcus Lopez Arguello **
- Saya Kuroki **
- Maria Salazar
- Petra Volga **
- Billy Bennett **
- Lex Miller **
- Willie Lewis **
- Victor
I will absolutely not write any Chester x reader, Chico x reader of Brandy Lynn x reader pieces, simply because I feel that those characters’ belief systems are not congruent with my own. We don’t romanticise ab*se, bea****lity, rac*sm or naz*sm in this house.
A few more things, I do write NSFW (not particularly well, but I do) but I don’t write dubcon or r*pe.
If you want a piece to deal with some more mature issues, or actually just in general, please let me know if you have any triggers I should avoid. I won’t post them or anything, I just want to make sure I don’t include anything that might be damaging to you, especially in your own fic, you know?
