Violet: *Glares*
Bodhi *flinches*: Xaden’s been rubbing off on you Sorrengail
Ridoc: *snorts* I bet he has

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Violet: *Glares*
Bodhi *flinches*: Xaden’s been rubbing off on you Sorrengail
Ridoc: *snorts* I bet he has
Aotrom is only 22. Ridoc is 22.
THIS MAKES SO MUCH SENSE
omg hello! requesting a part 2 to the threesome with ridoc and sawyer with innitistic reader 🥹 can be fluff or smut, either or, or both?? def need their reactions to how she knew they both wanted her 😩 tytyty!!!
Thank you for sending in a request, I really enjoyed writing this (even though it took me a while, sorry) I'm not looking to make a whole series or anything, but I think I could do like one of those things where people request scenarios with these characters, and the fics aren't really in any specific order, or a cohesive story, does that make sense? Do you know what I'm talking about? Anyway, hope you enjoy, @babypeapoddd
Secrets Laid Bare
Part 1 (This cannot be read as a stand alone)
The Poly Cafe
Summary: After their night together, Reader avoids Sawyer and Ridoc entirely. She unfortunately cannot hide forever and is forced to confront them where they learn her secret.
Warnings: Swearing, Mentions of murder, Panic attack, Prejudice against marked ones, Smut, Orgasm denial, Fluff, Angst, Hurt with comfort, Threesome, All involved parties are switches, Anal, Iron flame spoilers (You can read until the Xaden confrontation, there is a cut off) lmk if I missed anything
Word Count: 6.2k (4.9k without the extra scene)
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'So late, so late, so late', She chanted over and over again in her head. Y/n was supposed to be in physics right now, but after spotting Sawyer and Ridoc — neither of whom she'd spoken to after that night — she had practically turned tail and ran in the opposite direction, taking the long way around.
Context: Ridoc, Sawyer, and herself had a threesome two weeks ago, and while the sex had been fucking phenomenal, her mind had tormented her all night on the plethora of ways everything could go wrong. She woke up before the sun as a result, and crept out of the room they'd commandeered, adding them to the ever-growing list of people she had to avoid.
Some god must've taken pity on her, because that very morning, she was moved back out of their squad. Now, at this point, Y/n had become an expert at dodging people, but the more people she had to evade, the harder it became.
She was so preoccupied with everything that was going on, her own thoughts for once louder than everyone else's, that when she turned a sharp corner, she ran right smack into the middle of someone's chest. Y/n falls on her ass, rubbing her hands over her face, "Ow," She mutters, checking to make sure her nose wasn't broken.
She looks up at the person she'd run into only for her entire body to freeze when she realises she ran face first into Xaden Riorson. Y/n holds her breath, watching him. He stands there, tall and imposing as ever, studying her like a bug under a microscope. His expression is unreadable, one solid wall of concrete. It's a miracle she doesn't begin shaking. Up to this point, she had never seen the Wingleader this close, and she'd certainly never spoken to him. She could've gone the rest of her life without speaking to him and been very happy.
It felt like an eternity had passed, yet still, she was on the floor, frozen. Xaden hadn't moved an inch; if it wasn't for his chest moving up and down, she might've been convinced that she was really staring at a terrifyingly life-like statue. Unfortunately that was not the case. He stared down at her. It felt as if he was physically pinning her to the ground with the intensity of it. She didn't know what to do, what to think, so naturally, she lashed out with her signet. Y/n had discovered that along with mind reading, she could give people powerful head aches if she concentrated well enough.
Drawing from that well of magic inside of her, she throws it at him, imagining the glittering green energy into a spear, piercing his head. Her heart plummets when that metaphorical spear ricochets off of him and clatters to the ground with a sickening finality. Even though the attack does less than nothing, she swears she sees him flinch.
Xaden's onyx eyes widen, that in itself is more shocking than anything, Y/n doesn't think she can remember a time she's seen any expression on his face other than 'don't fuck with me; you won't live to regret it'. What happens next, is in short, a shit show.
"You're an inntinnsic," He whispers.
It's her turn to widen her eyes. First of all, how did he figure that out? More importantly though, what would he do to her now that he'd found out?
They stared at each other, unblinking and bewildered for several heartbeats before she did the worst possible thing she could've done in that situation.
She ran.
From Xaden. Fucking. Riorson. A shadow wielder, and her Wingleader.
'I'm dead. So, so dead.' Despite these thoughts, she continued to run like her life depended on it, because it very much did. Physics quickly became the last of her problems. The halls are mostly empty, all first years — which make up about 65% of the riders quadrant population — should be in class right now. She wasn't sure about the second and third years, but she also didn't care. Y/n just hoped that where ever everyone else was, that they stayed there.
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-Ridoc's Pov-
Ridoc and Sawyer stood against the walls of the sparring gym, pretending to pay attention to their squadmates, and their techniques, but really, they were each lost in thought. Memories of that night plagued them both. Sawyer worried that they'd done something wrong, and every time he talked to Ridoc about it, the other rider reassured him that Y/n had consented enthusiastically, they'd both made sure of it. No matter what her actions after said, it wasn't their fault.
Ridoc had kept it to himself but he'd be lying if he said that he wasn't mad. He could understand leaving before they woke up — he wasn't particularly a fan of awkward morning after conversations himself — he could understand not wanting to talk to them, hell, he could even understand her avoiding them, but to this extreme? It could not possibly be so bad that she wouldn't even walk the same halls as them. That she also refused to eat in the mess hall when they were there was just the icing on the cake. He knew that they hadn't done anything wrong, so what the fuck was making her react like this? Is it because she's a marked one? Did she assume that himself and Sawyer would do something to her? Hold it over Y/n's head somehow? The very thought made his blood boil.
"I gotta step outside for a sec," He muttered out the corner of his mouth. Sawyer glanced up at him, and kicked off the wall, "Yeah, I could use some fresh air too; it's getting stuffy in here"
Getting away from people was kind of the point; he didn't know how long he could keep his features schooled, but if anyone was going to understand, it would be Sawyer, so he didn't complain. No one noticed when they slipped out, carefully closing the door behind them.
He took a deep breath, holding it for a few counts, before slowly releasing it in an effort to calm himself down. Sawyer cautiously asked, "You thinking about her again?"
"Fuck, when am I not?" Ridoc asked back. A hint of pain poorly disguising itself as anger coloured his tone.
"I'm so sick of this!" He grunts, kicking a stray piece of rubble as hard as he could, "Her avoiding us, I mean. It's not fair on anyone"
Ridoc wished that it was only the way she sank down on him, the way he felt buried inside her, the sounds she'd made that he missed, but it wasn't. Yes, he missed and wanted all of that back, but it wasn't what made his heart ache. He could live without ever being in the same bed as her again, but he couldn't live without her. Before the absolutely mind blowing sex, they'd been squadmates, friends even. He missed making her laugh, and the looks they'd send each other during classes when the teachers were being especially boring. His life was terribly lacking now. Every time he walked onto the flight field, he still expected to see the deep forest green of Nyla's scales. He scanned every class he entered for her, day after day, and it hurt when she wasn't there.
"You have to admire her commitment though," Sawyer remarks with an expression that says he was in desperate need of some churam, even if he didn't smoke.
The worst part? It was true. Ridoc had no clue how you did it. Neither of them had seen so much as a glimpse of you ever since they'd dosed off in a tangle of limbs.
Their moping was interrupted by the sound of someone booking it through the passageways. Sawyer and Ridoc looked to each other, both having matching 'what the fuck?' expressions on their faces.
To their complete shock and surprise, Y/n is the one that came hurtling toward them. Anger reared up inside him, before quickly being washed away. She looked scared, terrified, actually. No matter what she did, he didn't want her to get hurt, despite himself, he still cared.
As if suddenly recognising whom she was running to, she skidded to a halt. She glanced hastily between the two of them, and back the way she came. 'So she was running from something, but what?' Ridoc craned his neck to see around the bend, and though the only thing he saw were rippling shadows, he could guess what, or rather who, was there.
"Y/n, finally ready to talk to us," He very much hoped she would hear it as the scapegoat it was meant to be, and not the sharp jab it sounded like.
Y/n stared at them, panting. He could see the gears turning in her head. 'Come on, you're a smart girl. Get the message'
She nodded hesitantly at first, then with more surety, "Uh, yeah, yeah, talk- talking sounds good," She grabbed both their arms, and with surprising strength, she dragged them away. Ridoc, and Sawyer let themselves be pulled along. He didn't know if his friend had seen what he had, but he was glad Sawyer had played along nonetheless. Y/n practically shoved them inside another empty dorm room, her breath still shaking.
She sank down against the door, her legs coming up in front of her. Y/n buried her face in her knees, arms wrapped tightly around herself. Ridoc suddenly felt guilty for all the anger he'd harbored toward her. She was clearly going through something that had nothing to do with them. He hadn't even considered the possibility that it might've been something else entirely, which in hindsight, was incredibly ignorant of him. He didn't pretend to understand what it was like to be a marked one, but he knew it was vastly different. Maybe you hid from them in fear of ridicule. If word got out, Sawyer and himself would likely be praised for their 'sexual prowess' or even envied, but he wouldn't put it past the more small minded riders to slut shame you for the very same thing. Maybe it wasn't the other riders, but the marked ones you were concerned about. Would they judge you for having a threesome with two Navarrians? Or perhaps they already knew, and you were trying to mitigate the fall out. What did he know? Maybe—
"Stop! Stop! Please I can't— I can't think!" Y/n's fingers tangled themselves in her hair, gripping the locks painfully hard. They looked at each other confused. Neither of them had said a thing since she'd shoved them through the door. A flash of deja vu struck him like one of Violet's lightning bolts. The image of the cadet who'd manifested as an inntinnsic invades his head. The way he yelled while gripping his head eerily similar to what Y/n was doing now. Ridoc thinks back to that evening that had started it all, back in the sparring gym. How Y/n had snapped, yelling for one of them to 'just fuck me' as she'd put it, as if she'd known that they were thinking of her. Because she had.
It seems that Sawyer comes to the same conclusion just moments after. Y/n shakily raises her head. Tears stream down her blotchy cheeks as she nods ever so slightly. Finally, she meets their eyes, flicking between the two of them.
"Please," She gasps out. It's so soft, he almost doesn't hear it. "Please don't tell anyone," Her voice cracks. It sounds like every word is scraping out of her throat. "They'll kill me"
He remembered all too clearly how merciless professor Carr had been to that cadet. Picturing her in that situation... he shuddered.
It seemed that once again, Sawyer and Ridoc had come to the same decision. Ridoc crouched low beside her, bringing her shaking form closer to his chest. Sawyer mirrored his actions, rubbing her back in slow gentle circles, whilst his own hand played with her hair to calm her down.
"Hey, hey, we're not going to tell anyone. Nobody else has to know, this'll stay between us,"
He had no idea how they were going to hide a signet. At some point, someone would start asking questions. Though that was a problem for later.
"Tell us what we can do to help," Sawyer whispered.
"Just— Think about something else. Anything else"
Ridoc hated how weak she sounded. This wasn't her. Y/n was strong, and capable, and fierce when she wanted to be. However, he didn't think he could think about something else right now. He tried, for her, his mind running through the classes they still had today, and what would be served for dinner tonight.
It seemed to be working. The tears had stopped flowing, and her breathing had finally returned to normal. She still sniffed here and there, but that was to be expected. At least the trembling had stopped.
They all three sat there for some time, rocking back and forth. Ridoc thought she'd fallen asleep before she mumbled against him, "Not asleep"
He was confused, and then felt silly, remembering that she was a mind reader. She pulled back, looking up at him with a guilty expression.
"Sorry, it's not on purpose. I can't help it."
"You can't control it?" Sawyer asked her, not unkindly.
She shrunk into herself, embarrassed. "I— Not completely," She admits, "I can block out most people if I focus on one stream of thought, but anything thought about me is louder and more difficult to shield against"
That made him wonder how long she'd been tuning into their thoughts. When had she manifested? Likely before their night together. Was she reading his mind then? Was she doing it now?
"Yes, both of you, I am. What part of 'I can't block out thoughts about me' did you guys not understand?"
Sawyer and Ridoc look sheepishly at each other, caught red handed. A wave of sadness comes over him when he realises that if she heard everything they thought about her, then she must know about all the conversations him and Sawyer had had about that night. How they'd discussed at length that they both wanted to be more than friends with her, and that they were willing to share.
He quickly buried the memories, knowing she'd hear them. Apparently he hadn't been quick enough. She sat back, staring at him slack-jawed. Y/n swiveled her head around to face Sawyer with the same expression.
"I— Wha— Excuse me?!"
She continued to gape at them, "No. I very much was not aware of that, of any of that," She answers, mainly directing it at Ridoc. He had no idea where Sawyer's thoughts had taken him, but for once they weren't on the same page. He looked about as confused as Ridoc felt.
"You guys talked about being in a polyamorous relationship with me?"
"Oh. That. Right," Sawyer said lamely, now able to fill in the parts of the 'conversation' he missed.
"How come you don't know?" Ridoc asks.
"My telepathy doesn't reach very far. I haven't been close enough to hear either of you" Y/n explains, "I can only hear the thoughts of people about... two and a half metres (8.2 feet) from me. Give or take"
Oh. That made sense. It also comforted him a bit. He didn't like the idea of her hearing all the things he thought of when he— 'If I want her to continue not knowing, I shouldn't finish that thought'
She smiles apologetically at him.
"I could teach you guys how to shield," She offers, "It's not all that different from how you block out your dragons"
"I don't know... I kinda like it. What do you think Sawyer?"
"It'll take some getting used to for sure, but there are certain advantages that come with it"
Ridoc could tell by the slight change in tone that Sawyer's mind had gone to the exact same place his had. He reveled in the furious blush blooming on her cheeks.
"What's wrong sweetheart? Can you hear all the dirty things we want to do to you?" Her legs squeezed together as she avoided his eyes. Ridoc wasn't having it. He cups her face, forcing her to look at him as he spoke, "Is it making you wet? If I reach into your panties right now, are you going to be dripping for us?"
She bites her lip, staring up at him with an innocent expression. Behind her, Sawyer brushed the hair off her shoulders and leaned in close, brushing gentle kisses along her neck, "He asked you a question darling. You should answer him"
In a sudden surge of confidence, she locks her hazel eyes with his brown ones, all shyness vanishing from her body, "He can find out for himself," She challenges.
Ridoc smiles, delighted. "You really want to play it this way, huh? You've already been a bad girl. There are two of us, and one of you; your odds aren't good"
"I like my odds just fine," Her voice drops, becoming low and seductive, "Think you can handle me?"
Ridoc's gaze became predatory. He'd originally planned to be soft, and sweet, a nice welcome into this new relationship dynamic, but he had absolutely no problem teaching her a few lessons first.
"Oh, we'll do much more than 'handle you', sweetheart"
Ridoc scoops her up in one smooth motion, setting her on the bed with utmost care. He, with Sawyer's help, undress her meticulously, like they were trying to unwrap a Christmas present without tearing the paper. Ridoc begins to do a strip tease. Unbuckling each clasp one by one, and slowly drags the zipper down. He removes the shirt, then trails his fingers lightly over his abs down to his crotch. In her peripherals, Y/n sees Sawyer roll his eyes at Ridoc's display, having already undressed himself and is now standing there entirely naked, waiting for him to finish.
"You know, I'd like to get started before graduation, so can we speed this up please?"
Ridoc glares half-heartedly, grumbling, "No patience. No appreciation for the arts"
He complies though, taking off his pants without the dramatics. Before he can even finish the thought to get settled between her legs, Sawyer is shoving him out the way, "Nuh uh, you got to eat her out last time, I've waited weeks for a taste, entertain yourself," He then turns to Y/n, "You tell us after who does it better, yeah?"
She nods, smothering a smile when Ridoc scowls. Despite this, he doesn't argue, contenting himself with watching as Sawyer had the first time. He pushes her legs apart, and pauses, admiring.
"Fucking hell, I really missed out, didn't I?" He asks, pupils blown.
Ridoc smirks, thinking of everything he felt whist eating her out. How her thighs tried to close on his head, the show he'd put on for them. He's sure that to them it looked purposeful, but that's just what she made him want to do. He couldn't help it, he'd never enjoyed giving oral so much in his life.
"Just wait until you taste her. You'll never want anything more than being between her thighs"
Sawyer practically begins to tremble with desire, licking his lips like a dog. He lowers himself to be level with her entrance, shaking. He takes one tentative lick, scooping up some of the copious slick gathered and groans deep in his throat. All reservations are broken in that moment, the gentle facade ripped apart and in its place, a ravenous man on his knees in worship.
Y/n's hands fly to his hair, tangling in his sandy waves. She writhes, the sensations overwhelming her. It isn't helped by Ridoc's mouth skating over the sensitive skin of her neck, daring to leave hickies dangerously close to where they might be seen.
"Ridoc! Someone could— Ohh!" She begins to say, but is interrupted by a stinging bite on her clit. Y/n stares down bewildered at Sawyer. Ridoc chuckles, "Aww, he's jealous. Upset she's moaning my name, and not yours?" He taunts, "Didn't you say you'd 'show me how it's done?' Looks like you don't really know what you're doing"
Sawyer's eyes narrow dangerously. It's like she's no longer in the room. This is just between them. After a moment of pure undiluted fire burning into Ridoc, Sawyer fucking devours her. Y/n can barely breath from the relentless onslaught.
"Sawyer, Fuck SAWYER!"
He smiles against her, looking smugly at Ridoc. The ice wielder pays him no mind, which should've been the first warning. He does nothing as his friend works her to the very edge. Once she's there, Ridoc practically manhandles Sawyer, needing to use all his body weight to get him off of her. Sawyer whines, fighting to keep at it. Y/n cries out, panting, "Ridoc! Why'd you do that?"
"You decided you want to have an attitude, you think you get to cum just like that?"
Sawyer grumbles behind him, but accepts the turn that's been taken. He crawls back up the bed, lying next to her. Ridoc grabs his leathers, and fishes around in the deepest pants pocket before pulling out a bottle of lube.
"Aha! Been carrying this around just in case ever since... well, you know" He says. Real subtle.
Ridoc clambers so that he's the one between her legs. Y/n wraps them around his waist, yanking him closer.
"Patience, sweetheart. All in good time"
He says that, but apparently 'all in good time' means 'as quickly as I can lube my cock and get it inside you without causing pain'.
Ridoc thrusted deep inside her ruthlessly. Sawyer helped muffle her moans with his mouth on hers while Ridoc's sounded out around the room without any restrictions. Fuck he was enjoying this. He could feel Y/n clamping down on his cock. She was close, and he couldn't wait to rip her release away from her again.
In a sudden turn of events, Y/n pushed Sawyer away from her, and tugged Ridoc down instead. Before he could even register what had happened, she'd flipped him over, and begun riding him. He looked up at her dumbly, his breaths shuddering out of him.
"Inntinnsic, remember?"
Shit, that's right. Until he learned to shield, Y/n would always know what he was about to do before he did it. She has the entire night. Every time he'd 'stolen' her orgasm was only possible because she let him. He hated the way it reframed all the events of tonight. Hated even more how his traitorous body shivered with pleasure, and the way his cock twitched inside of her. Most of all, he hated the knowing smile on her face.
"Aww, you didn't think you were really in charge, did you?"
He tried to glare, but in the same moment, his eyes rolled back, and he arched up into her with a needy moan.
"Sawyer, won't you come over here and help your friend? His hole is in desperate need to be filled"
Fuck! He had really hoped she hadn't heard that little thought of his. Evidently he wasn't so lucky.
Sawyer looked shocked, but it didn't take a mind reader to see that he was extremely tempted. It occurred to Ridoc that Y/n wouldn't have suggested it unless she thought his friend would be interested. Did he think about fucking Ridoc? Was it a recent thought, or has it been on his mind for a while.
"Oh, Ridoc, you've got no idea what filthy things go on inside his head," She crooned. The deep blush rapidly spreading across his features gave Ridoc more questions than answers.
"He's feeling shy, how cute. Ridoc, tell him how much you want him," He hesitated. He'd be lying if he said he'd never imagined it, but never in all those fantasies had Ridoc thought Sawyer might actually want it too.
"Go on," Y/n encouraged, "Beg Sawyer to fuck you. Tell him how badly you need it"
Ridoc's eyes shoot to Sawyer. He seems unsure, gaze flitting about, never focusing on anything. Ridoc does what he does best, and pitches his voice needy and desperate, "Sawyer? Please? I need it so badly. Been dreaming about you forever. Imagining your cock when I touch myself"
The metallurgist looks to Y/n, as if asking for confirmation.
"Oh honey, that's a severe oversimplification of what he's fantasised about you"
Ridoc didn't know if Y/n was just saying that to help convince Sawyer, or if she really had been present in his mind during those imagined scenarios. She winked at him, which didn't actually answer his question.
Sawyer's hands clenched and flexed a few times, as if imagining clutching something, Ridoc's hips perhaps. He could see Sawyer's dick bobbing slightly. He almost drooled at the thought of all that inside him.
"Please, Sawyer, I need you," He bucked his hips up for emphasis. His friend glances at Y/n again, "Mistress," He starts, and Y/n allows her eyes to flutter shut briefly, pleased with the title, "May I?"
She places her hand under his chin, guiding him forward, "You are just perfect aren't you? Doing exactly as you're supposed to without having to be told"
She kisses the tip of his nose before releasing her hold on him, "Give it to him"
Sawyer doesn't hesitate, reaching for the lube and immediately applying it to Ridoc's entrance. He moans beneath her, gripping Y/n's arms to ground himself while his friend plays with him.
"Shh, shh, Sawyer's gonna take good care of you, don't worry. He'll fuck you nicely, won't you, Sawyer?" Y/n asks over her shoulder. He nods, leaning forward to kiss the juncture of her neck. The metallurgist meets Ridoc's brown eyes in a startling display of dominance, "Tell me to put it in"
Ridoc, unable to help himself, challenges him, "No. You want it just as badly as I do. Why should I have to beg?"
He grabs Y/n's hips, lifting her up and slamming her back down on him. It's too good, and he's already so desperate. Ridoc arches his back dangerously high, his face screwed up in a silent scream. "Because you're a good boy, and you listen"
He certainly was not, but that tone made him want to be. "Put it in me, please Sawyer"
He obliges his friend, rewarding him with the tip of his cock pushing inside the tight ring of muscle.
"More, more more more!" He cries.
Sawyer mercifully sinks in deeper, slowly inching in till he's completely buried in the ice wielder. He takes a moment to catch his breath, "Tell me... who do you belong to?"
It seems that Ridoc genuinely ponders the question, Knowing Sawyer wanted him to stroke his ego, and say his name, but of course, he'd rather stir the pot, "Y/n"
Sawyer clenches his jaw, gaze darkening on Ridoc over Y/n's shoulder, "No. Right now you belong to me. Say it. Say it, or I stop"
Ridoc stares back at him defiantly, daring his friend to end this. And he does. Sawyer makes good on his threat, pulling out entirely. It's abundantly clear that never in a million years, did Ridoc think Sawyer would actually stop.
"You, fuck Sawyer, I belong to you! Please! Come back! Y/n, make him come back!" Ridoc had tears welling in his eyes at the sudden loss, so she took pity on him.
"Sawyer, put him out of his misery. There will be plenty of time to toy with him later, but for now, put it back in him so we can all cum"
"Of course, angel" He says, acting as if he was all innocent. Nobody would ever guess from his tone the sexual torture he was putting his friend through.
He wraps his arms around Y/n, and settles himself back in Ridoc's heat. He sighs in relief, calming down now that he was full again.
Y/n turns her head, placing a kiss on Sawyer's cheek, "You start, I'll follow your lead"
And so he does, thrusting rhythmically inside, Y/n matching his pace perfectly. It isn't surprising when it takes almost no time at all for Ridoc to get close.
"Fuck, 'm gonna cum"
"But you'll wait for us, won't you?" Y/n asks, something dangerous in her voice.
He shifts uncomfortably under her gaze, the mounting pleasure difficult to keep at bay, "I— I don't know if I can, sweetheart"
She hums, disappointed, "Looks like we need to slow down—"
"NO! Please don't slow down. I'll hold it. I'll be good, promise"
Y/n smirks, knowing that would be his reaction, and reveling in the way she could play him like a fiddle, "That's what I thought"
Her and Sawyer go on for what feels like hours to the man beneath them. He almost cried in relief when Y/n finally gave him permission to cum, her and Sawyer joining him in overwhelming bliss.
Ridoc babbled unintelligibly whilst Y/n and Sawyer took care of him, and each other. It occurred to every one of them that they probably should return to lessons, but none of them had any intentions of doing so.
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If you haven't finished Iron Flame, or are only interested in the Sawyer/Reader/Ridoc dynamic, you can stop here. This is just extra. (The Xaden confrontation {1.3k})
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Y/n's Pov
Ridoc and Sawyer basically glue themselves to my sides as we walk down the hall, finally leaving the random dorm room. Classes are officially over for the day... I hope Dain isn't too hard on them. We make our way to the dining hall, but standing against the wall to the entrance, is none other than Xaden Riorson.
Sawyer and Ridoc look to me when I stop, then seeing who I'm staring at, they both tense. The shadow wielder's sharp gaze cuts into me, and I gulp. He pushes himself off the wall with way too much casual arrogance, striding over to us confidently. My boyfriends — it feels so weird to say that, even if only in my head — step forward, shielding me.
He raises a scarred brow, unamused. Touching both of their shoulders, I whisper, "It fine, go ahead," I jerk my head at the doorway. They turn back to me, and even without being in their heads, the concern exuding from them is palpable. Reluctantly, they leave me with Xaden. To my complete and utter horror, Ridoc has the audacity to shoulder check him. My entire body freezes.
Please don't kill him. Please don't kill him. Please, please, for the love of Amari, don't kill him.
Apart from a cutting glance, Xaden does nothing. My relief is short lived, because a moment later, those dark eyes are on me. "Cadet L/n. We need to talk. Privately."
My heart dropped. I knew this would happen, but that didn't lessen the fear. I wondered if there was anything I could do, anything I could say. More importantly though, a deeper, darker part of me, one drowning in self-loathing, wondered if I should say something. If I was found out, I would be putting every marked one at Basgiath under even worse scrutiny. However, if I let Xaden kill me, no one would bat an eye. Wouldn't it be selfish to try an live, when doing so might put everyone at greater risk?
But then... Ridoc and Sawyer... we'd just worked things out, and they would surely be furious if I died. I wouldn't put it past either of them to do something stupid like try to hurt Xaden in some way if they ever found out that he did it.
Xaden advanced quickly through the twisting hallways silently. Not once did he check to make sure I was still with him, probably relying on his reputation to keep me in line. Asshole. He's not wrong though. Whatever confidence possessed me before that allowed me to run from him had fled, and defying him now felt like a death sentence.
Listening to him might be a death sentence. Every instinct I had was telling me, screaming at me to run. Find Nyla. Mount. Fly. And never look back. That's never going to be an option though. A sinking feeling threatens to pull me under, and my subconscious finally comes to the realisation that I actually could die within the next five minutes, and I'm going to do absolutely nothing to stop it.
'Nyla?'
'I'm on my way, hold on!'
'...Thank you for choosing me. It's been an honour. I hope your next rider is a worthy one. More worthy than me, at least'
'You are not dying!' She practically bellows in my head, 'I will not let him hurt you!'
Panic that I know isn't entirely my own floods my body, and I do my best to shove it away, blocking out my dragon at the same time. Xaden grabs my wrist, dragging me through the secret tunnel. It should scare me, being plunged into darkness, Xaden's strong suit, but I'm too busy carefully locking my emotions away in preparation. A mental exercise I haven't had to indulge in since the executions, something my father taught me to help with my anxiety. I refuse to die afraid. If today is my last, then it will be on my terms.
When we finally get to the flight field, the Wingleader whipping around to face me, all he is met with is cool indifference.
Xaden scowls. Whether it's at me, or that's just his face, is a mystery.
'...Nyla, can you tell them I'm sorry? That it's not their fault?' I don't have to specify who 'them' is.'
'No!' She shrieks, 'I'm almost there!'
I know it's true. Thunderous wing beats sound out in the open air not too far away, but it would only take a minute for him to kill me and dispose of the body in the rushing river nearby. Why he hasn't yet, is a little perplexing. He stares at me, as if trying to pillage through my thoughts, like he's the mind reader, not me.
"Do you have any control over it?" He asks me. It's so unexpected, that it gives me more of a fright than if he'd pulled out a blade and slit my throat.
"Not much," I respond truthfully. There's no point in lying. Oddly enough though, he doesn't look murderous, he looks... thoughtful? No, that's not the right word. He looks like he's trying to fit me into a puzzle he's created, holding my piece up to the picture to see where I could belong.
Nyla lands behind me, gusts of break neck winds pushing up sand all around us, He doesn't even flinch! I can't decide it that's his fearlessness, or his arrogance.
"How much do you know about our... 'operations'?"
I struggle to beat down the sheepish expression that has become so natural to me. Admittedly, I knew much more than I should from hearing snippets in the other's heads. Enough to get us all killed (Which really not much is needed at all) but not enough to know what's going on at any given time. I wonder what's the best answer in this situation. If I say yes, would that make me useful, or a threat? If I say no, would I be let off with a warning? He can't kill me now, not with my dragon right behind us, that would be stupid. But there's nothing stopping him from killing me later.
Nyla prowls closer, head low, golden eyes piercing Xaden like if she glares hard enough, he'll burst into flames.
"Well?" He prompts.
"More than I should," I reveal cautiously.
He doesn't move, doesn't blink, "How much do you think you could find out?" I know he's not talking about whatever the marked ones are doing, he's talking about the Navarrians. What information can you get. What secrets can you unfold? Are you worth the trouble of keeping you alive?
For no more than a split second, a hairline crack in his mental walls appear. Without conscious thought, my signet leaps, latching onto that little breach, and in that minuscule moment, I see something that breaks my facade.
"You're inntinnsic too"
His eyes widen, then narrow. I notice his hand twitch, as if wanting to pin me to the wall, but one glance at Nyla keeps him from doing so.
"Yes," He grits out, "I am. And I plan to train you"
My brain short circuits. "You what?"
"I'm going to train you," Xaden reiterates, "to use your signet, and most importantly, to hide it. Be here tomorrow at eight"
He says nothing else, disappearing back into the tunnel dramatically. All he needs is a flowing cape. Once gone, I allow myself to sink to the floor and take a deep, shuddering breath.
"He's not going to kill me. Thank the gods," I whisper to no one. My heart is beating out of my chest, but slowly, a smile creeps it's way onto my face. Yes, I my have had one of the scariest interactions of my life, but I have two amazing boyfriends waiting to dote on me.
I could get used to this.
-------------------------------
Part 3
“not all men”
you’re right ridoc gamlyn would never
“You can watch me” - Ridoc Gamlyn x female reader
Summary: You and Ridoc end up sleeping together almost immediately
Warnings: Smut; fluff; fingering;
Words: 3.4K
Notes: I couldn’t wait much longer to post this - we need more Ridoc stories so this might become a small series ehhehehe
This isn’t proofread so sorry for any mistakes or repetitions or anythinggggg
Part One Here ⇒ I'm Not Watching You
Y/N’s POV
Ridoc’s lips don’t leave mine as we stumble further into the room, his hands warm and steady against my hips, like he’s guiding me but not controlling me. Every kiss is teasing, deliberate, like he’s savouring the moment—or more accurately, savouring the way I’m starting to melt under his touch. His lips leave mine briefly, only to trail down to the sensitive spot just beneath my jaw, where he pauses to press slow, heated kisses that make my breath hitch.
“You’re quiet,” he murmurs against my skin, his voice low and rich with amusement. “I like it.”
“Don’t get used to it,” I manage to say, though my words are breathless, lacking any real conviction.
Ridoc huffs a soft laugh, his lips curling into a smirk that I can feel against my neck. “You keep saying that, but I’m not convinced.”
I don’t have the chance to reply because his hands slide up my sides, his thumbs brushing beneath the hem of my shirt, just barely grazing my skin. The simple touch sends a wave of heat through me, and I gasp quietly, my fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt as I pull him closer, refusing to give him the satisfaction of stepping back.
He tilts his head, catching my mouth with his again, and this time the kiss is slower, deeper. His tongue brushes against mine, coaxing rather than demanding, and I swear he’s trying to dismantle me piece by piece. One of his hands moves to the small of my back, steady and insistent, while the other tangles in my hair, tilting my head just enough to deepen the angle of the kiss.
“You’re trouble,” I mutter against his lips, the words coming out more like a sigh than anything else.
“So are you,” he counters smoothly, his grin audible in his tone. “But isn’t that what makes this fun?”
The teasing glint in his voice is enough to snap me out of whatever spell he’s weaving. I tug at his shirt, pulling him closer as a challenge, refusing to let him have the upper hand. Ridoc seems to enjoy it, his laughter rumbling low and warm in his chest as he lets me take control for a moment, his lips meeting mine with equal fervour.
It’s only when the back of my knees hit something solid that I realise he’s been steering me the whole time. I barely have time to register what’s happening before I lose my balance, the unexpected movement sending me tumbling backward onto the edge of the bed with a soft, surprised sound.
Ridoc comes with me, catching himself with one hand braced against the mattress beside my head. The other stays firmly on my waist, his grip steady as he looks down at me with a mixture of amusement and something darker, something that makes my heart skip a beat.
“Careful,” he says, his voice softer now, though his grin hasn’t lost its mischievous edge. “I’d hate for you to hurt yourself.”
“Funny,” I retort, though my voice wavers just enough to betray me. “I thought you were the dangerous one.”
He smirks, his free hand coming up to brush a strand of hair away from my face. “Oh, I am. But don’t worry—I’ll catch you every time.”
There’s something in his tone, something warm and unguarded, that makes my chest tighten. Before I can think too hard about it, he leans down, capturing my lips in another kiss that’s slower this time, more deliberate. His weight presses against me, his body warm and solid, and the sensation sends a thrill racing through me.
His lips leave mine to trail down my neck again, his teeth grazing my skin just enough to draw a quiet gasp from me. His hand slides beneath my shirt, his fingers tracing lazy circles along my waist, the touch light and teasing.
“You’re going to drive me crazy,” I whisper, my voice barely audible over the sound of my own racing heartbeat.
Ridoc lifts his head, his grin softening into something almost tender as his thumb brushes against my skin. “Good,” he murmurs, his tone playful but laced with sincerity. “Then we’re even.”
He kisses me again, his hand slipping from my waist to thread through my hair, and I lose myself in the feeling of him—his warmth, his weight, the way he’s somehow both maddeningly teasing and completely grounding all at once. I don’t know where this is going or what it means, but for now, I don’t care.
Ridoc’s lips trace a burning path down my neck, his kisses deliberate and lingering, as though he’s memorising every inch of me with his mouth. Each touch sends a rush of fire through my veins, making it harder to think, harder to breathe. His hands are everywhere—sliding over my waist, my back, cradling me like I’m something precious and fragile, yet anchoring me so firmly I feel like I might shatter if he lets go.
I arch against him instinctively, a soft gasp slipping free when his teeth scrape lightly against the sensitive skin below my ear. It’s too much and not enough all at once, my thoughts spinning wildly as he presses closer, his body fitting perfectly against mine.
“Ridoc,” I whisper, his name tumbling from my lips without permission, and he hums in response, the sound low and dangerous and enough to make my knees go weak.
His lips skim my collarbone, his fingers slipping under the hem of my shirt, the heat of his touch burning into my skin. I feel the shift in him—the slight hesitation as his fingers trail upward, his movements careful but insistent.
“Is this okay?” he murmurs, his breath warm against my skin, his voice rough with restraint. He lifts his head, his dark eyes locking onto mine, searching, waiting.
I hesitate, my hands fisting in the fabric of his shirt to steady myself as the weight of the moment crashes over me. My heart pounds in my chest, a relentless rhythm of want and worry. I want this. I want him. But a tiny voice whispers in the back of my mind, reminding me of the risks, the stakes, the things I can’t take back once they’re given.
“Wait,” I say, my voice breaking as I press a trembling hand against his chest. He freezes instantly, his brow furrowing as he pulls back just enough to look at me fully.
“What is it?” he asks, his tone softer now, threaded with concern.
I bite my lip, glancing away as I try to gather my thoughts. My chest tightens with a mix of vulnerability and fear, but I force myself to meet his gaze. “I don’t want this to be… just a one-time thing,” I admit, the words spilling out in a rush before I lose my nerve. “If we’re doing this, it has to mean something. I need to know that it’s not just casual for you.”
Ridoc stares at me for a moment, his expression shifting into something I don’t entirely recognise. There’s no cocky grin, no teasing glint in his eye—just an earnestness so raw and unguarded it makes my breath catch. Slowly, he lifts a hand to my face, his thumb brushing gently over my cheek in a touch so tender it nearly undoes me.
“You think I’d be here, like this, if it didn’t mean something?” he asks, his voice low but steady. His gaze never wavers, his intensity pinning me in place. “You think I’d touch you, kiss you, look at you the way I do if there was anyone else? There’s no one but you. There never has been.”
His words hit me like a thunderclap, unraveling every ounce of doubt I’ve been holding onto. My chest tightens, my throat burning as I stare at him, trying to find any trace of insincerity and coming up empty. He’s serious. Ridoc Gamlyn, the man who could charm his way out of any situation, who always seems to have a smirk on his face and a joke on his lips, is looking at me like I’m the only thing that’s ever mattered.
I swallow hard, my hands trembling as I slide them up to his shoulders, pulling him closer. “Okay,” I whisper, my voice breaking on the word. “Okay.”
Ridoc doesn’t move for a heartbeat, his gaze lingering on mine as though he’s giving me one last chance to change my mind. Then his lips crash against mine, harder, hungrier, every ounce of restraint slipping away. His hands grip my waist, pulling me flush against him as his kiss deepens, his teeth catching my bottom lip in a way that makes my breath hitch.
My fingers tangle in his hair, tugging lightly as heat coils low in my stomach, a heady mix of anticipation and need flooding through me. When his hands find the hem of my shirt again, this time pulling it up just slightly, I don’t stop him.
Instead, I let myself fall into him completely, losing myself in the heat of his touch and the fire in his kiss
Ridoc’s kiss deepens, his lips and tongue working in perfect rhythm with an intensity that sets me alight. His hands are everywhere—careful but commanding, sliding over my sides, my back, leaving a trail of heat in their wake. The world narrows down to just him: the press of his body, the rasp of his breath, the faintest tremble in his touch that tells me he’s holding back more than I can fathom.
When his fingers find the hem of my shirt, he pauses again, his forehead resting against mine. “Tell me to stop, and I will,” he murmurs, his voice low, husky, and utterly sincere.
I shake my head, my own breath shaky as I grip the fabric of his shirt tighter in my fists. “I don’t want you to stop.”
That’s all he needs. Slowly, deliberately, he tugs at the hem of my shirt, his hands brushing against my skin as he lifts it higher. Every movement is unhurried, reverent, like he’s savouring each second. When the fabric finally clears my head, Ridoc tosses it to the side, his gaze dropping to my newly exposed skin.
The way he looks at me sends a shiver through my entire body. It’s not just lust—it’s awe, reverence, like I’m something he never thought he’d deserve but refuses to let go of now that I’m here. His hands trace over my shoulders, down my arms, his thumbs brushing the curve of my collarbones with a gentleness that feels at odds with the fire in his eyes.
“You’re beautiful,” he whispers, the words so soft they’re almost a breath, but they hit me with the force of a confession. His lips follow the path of his hands, pressing soft, lingering kisses to my shoulders, my throat, the curve of my neck.
Ridoc takes his time, his touch maddeningly slow as he works his way lower. His fingers trail down my sides, slipping beneath the waistband of my flight trousers just enough to tease but not enough to make a move yet. He looks up at me, his eyes locking onto mine as he leans in to press a kiss just below my collarbone, his lips warm and soft against my skin.
“Tell me if it’s too much,” he murmurs, his voice thick with restraint.
“It’s not,” I manage, my voice trembling. “It’s perfect.”
His smirk makes a brief appearance, softer now, tinged with affection. “Good. Because I’m not rushing this. Not with you.”
His hands find the button of my flight trousers, and as he unfastens it, his lips continue their slow exploration, kissing and nipping at every inch of skin he reveals. He presses his lips to the dip of my stomach, the edge of his teeth grazing the sensitive skin there just enough to make my breath hitch.
When my flight trousers join my shirt on the floor, Ridoc leans back slightly, his gaze sweeping over me in a way that should make me feel self-conscious but somehow doesn’t. There’s no judgment in his expression, only raw, unfiltered desire mixed with something deeper, something that makes my chest tighten.
“You’re incredible,” he says, his voice low and rough, and the way he says it—like he truly believes it—makes my heart stumble in my chest.
He reaches for me again, his hands warm and steady as they slide up my thighs, over my hips, his touch reverent and grounding. Every brush of his fingers, every press of his lips feels deliberate, like he’s worshiping every inch of me, committing every detail to memory.
When his lips find mine again, it’s different this time—slower, deeper, filled with an intensity that makes my head spin. His hands cup my face, his thumbs brushing over my cheekbones as he kisses me like he’s trying to tell me everything he can’t put into words.
“Ridoc,” I whisper against his lips, my voice trembling with emotion I can’t quite name.
He pulls back just enough to meet my gaze, his forehead resting against mine. “You okay?”
I nod, swallowing hard as I lift a hand to his face, my fingers tracing the sharp line of his jaw. “I just… I’ve never—no one’s ever made me feel like this before.”
Ridoc’s expression softens, his eyes searching mine as he lifts a hand to cover mine where it rests against his cheek. “Good,” he says, his voice low but firm. “Because I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you.”
His words settle over me like a promise, and when his lips find mine again, I let myself fall into him completely, trusting him to catch me. And he does.
Ridoc’s hands move with a slow, deliberate intent, his fingers brushing over my shoulders before gliding down my arms. His touch feels electric, leaving a trail of heat in its wake. When his hands come to rest at the clasp of my bra, he pauses, his eyes flicking up to meet mine, searching for any sign of hesitation.
My breath catches, my heart pounding so loudly I’m sure he can hear it. I nod, giving him the silent permission he seems to need. His lips curve into the faintest smile—soft, reverent—before his fingers deftly undo the clasp.
The moment the fabric slips away, I feel the cool air against my skin, a stark contrast to the warmth radiating off him. Ridoc’s gaze lowers, his expression shifting into something almost worshipful. His hands return, gliding up my sides and stopping just beneath my ribs, his thumbs brushing over the sensitive skin there.
“You’re perfect,” he murmurs, the words barely audible but carrying the weight of absolute sincerity.
His hands move higher, slow and careful, and when his palms finally cup me, I feel the world tilt on its axis. His touch is firm but tender, his thumbs grazing over me in a way that sends a shiver racing down my spine. My breath stutters, and a soft sound escapes me before I can stop it, a mix of surprise and overwhelming sensation.
Ridoc’s lips find my throat, pressing kisses there as his hands explore, mapping me with a care that makes my chest ache. His touch is maddening, teasing, like he’s determined to take his time and savour every reaction he pulls from me.
“Ridoc,” I whisper, his name a breathless plea.
He pulls back just enough to meet my gaze, his eyes dark and filled with something that makes my stomach twist in the best way. “Tell me what you need,” he says, his voice rough but steady, grounding me even as I feel like I’m unraveling.
“I just—” I bite my lip, heat rushing to my face as I struggle to find the words. But I don’t need to.
Ridoc seems to understand, his hands sliding lower, tracing a path down my stomach. Every movement feels deliberate, each touch igniting something deep within me. When his fingers finally slip between us, brushing against the apex of my thighs, I can’t hold back the gasp that tears from my lips.
The sensation is overwhelming, a sharp spike of pleasure that spreads through me like wildfire. His touch is gentle but assured, his fingers moving with a confidence that leaves me breathless. My hips arch instinctively, seeking more, and Ridoc responds with a low, throaty sound that makes my pulse race.
“You’re incredible,” he murmurs, his lips brushing against my ear. “Every sound, every movement... I could get drunk on you.”
His words, combined with the skilful way his fingers explore, send me spiralling further into a haze of pleasure. The world falls away until there’s nothing but Ridoc—his touch, his voice, the way he looks at me like I’m the only thing that matters.
Ridoc’s fingers move with unrelenting precision, each stroke coaxing a crescendo of sensation that builds higher and higher, until I feel like I might shatter from it. My breath comes in ragged gasps, and I clutch at his shoulders, grounding myself in the solid warmth of him as he watches me, his gaze heavy with intensity and something softer, more profound.
“You’re so beautiful like this,” he murmurs, his voice rough but gentle, sending a shiver down my spine. His thumb brushes a sensitive spot, and I cry out, my body arching into him as the tension inside me finally snaps.
Pleasure crashes over me in waves, and I cling to him as the world blurs and narrows to nothing but the overwhelming sensation and the sound of his voice murmuring quiet encouragements against my skin. His lips press soft kisses along my temple, my cheek, grounding me as I come back down, trembling and breathless.
When my pulse steadies and I open my eyes, Ridoc is watching me with a small, self-satisfied grin tugging at his lips. The tenderness in his gaze makes my chest ache. Without thinking, I reach for him, tugging at his shirt, my fingers desperate to find skin.
But Ridoc gently catches my hands, stilling them with a quiet chuckle. “Whoa there,” he teases, though his voice is husky, betraying his own restraint.
“Ridoc,” I protest, pulling at his hands, but he shakes his head, leaning down to capture my lips in a slow, lingering kiss.
When he pulls back, his forehead rests against mine, his breath mingling with my own. “Tonight’s about you,” he whispers, his voice low and steady. “I wanted to make sure you felt how much you mean to me. We can do more another day, but for now…” He trails off, brushing a strand of hair from my face with a tenderness that sends warmth flooding through me.
I start to argue, but he silences me with another kiss—soft and insistent, stealing the words from my lips and leaving me dizzy. “Let’s get into bed,” he murmurs when he pulls back, his smile gentle but firm. “I just want to hold you tonight.”
There’s no room for argument in his tone, but the sincerity in his eyes melts any resistance I might have had. With a soft sigh, I let him guide me toward the bed. He pulls the covers back and helps me settle in, his movements careful and unhurried, like he’s savouring every moment.
When he slips in beside me, his arms wrap around me, pulling me close against his chest. His warmth surrounds me, his heartbeat steady and grounding beneath my ear.
“Just you and me,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to the top of my head. “That’s all I need.”
And as I lie there, cocooned in his embrace, I realise it’s all I need, too.
Fourth Wing Masterlist TAG LIST - updated 12th Oct 2024
@caramelmacchiato07 @fanficscuziranout @daisydark @mariahoedt @marrass @honethatty12 @ladymacbabe
I love Xaden, I truly do. But my mind keeps turning—turning to just how fun of a partner Ridoc would be.
The inside jokes alone? Absolutely off the charts. You and Ridoc would be in the middle of a battle, dodging Venin attacks, and he'd crack a joke about how you still owe him five silvers from a bet you made last week. The worst part? Only your dragons would even come close to understanding half of what you two are saying. Everyone else? Helplessly confused.
And Aotrom? That little menace would probably tolerate you, but just barely. Like, he wouldn’t immediately set you on fire if you got too close, but he’d definitely give a warning growl. Maybe a singed sleeve here and there to keep you on your toes. Ridoc, of course, would think this is hilarious. “He likes you!” he’d say while you glare at him, brushing embers off your jacket.
You just know Ridoc would be the absolute worst with those “the sex is so good, they got me down lock and key” jokes. Casually leaning on the sparring ring, arms crossed, smug. “What can I say? I’d run, but they’ve got my heart—and my schedule—on lockdown.” You’d shove him off the ledge just to shut him up, and he’d laugh all the way down.
A relationship with Ridoc Gamlyn wouldn’t just be romance. It’d be trouble, comedy, and an ongoing battle of wits where neither of you truly wins—except for the fact that you’d be having the time of your life.
🥺👉👈 ridoc who falls head over heels in love with violets twin who is autistic and he's an absolute sweetheart to her, and helps her when she needs something and protects her.
Also their dragons are mated and aotrom is very over protective of her.
I had so much fun writing this. I hope this was written well. As a parent of an autistic child (diagnosed) and as someone who suspects herself and her other child are AuDHD but in the process of getting diagnosed, I really tried to represent this well. I also think in the Fourth Wing universe, at least in Basgaith, many mental differences are shunned or looked down upon, so I went that angle with this fic. Please give me feedback on how I did with this request. I also have some ideas for a part two so let me know if you'd like that! Thank you for your request though! I had a lot of fun working on it. :)
Own Worst Enemy - Ridoc x Sorrengail!Reader
Warnings: violence, death, dragon mate possessive behaviour
Word Count: 4,274
I sat quietly next to Violet, as she interacted with her- our friends. As much as they assured me that I was just as included as her, I’d never really felt that way. I wasn’t like her. I didn’t know what to say, what to do? Always feeling a little bit lost when the group was together, like I was one step behind, too busy analyzing everyone to add my own input into conversations. Sometimes it felt like they only put up with me because I was Violet’s twin, and not nearly as breakable as her.
I was good with schoolwork and okay with challenges, at least good enough to hold my own and take minimal injuries; and my joints are stronger than hers, not popping and breaking under pressure. Perks of being a fraternal twin I guess. Our DNA isn’t identical. No, something else in me feels broken. Something deeper. More substantial. Something I never talked about with anyone, ever.
Violet has asked before, in my moments of weakness, when everything is too much and I can’t hide. But I always am able to reign it back in then, hide it all behind a smile and recite lines I know will appease her worry. After all, the mask I wear protects me, especially growing up in a family where weakness isn’t tolerated. Even Dad, who saw straight through me. He expected me to reign it in too. Taught me in his own ways how to know what to say, how to make people look away, how to breathe when it was too much. Yet he still expected me to conform, to act like everything was okay. Like I wasn’t broken and weak minded.
I was a good actress at least. Everyone just thought I was quiet and reserved. And they never looked too hard at me, letting me fall into the background. I preferred it that way, it was much easier.
Everyone, except Ridoc Gamlyn, of course. He was always right there. In my space, but somehow, I never minded it. Maybe because with Ridoc, it didn’t matter what I said, he just accepted it. When I missed an unwritten social rule, he just smiled and responded, somehow getting what I was trying to say instead of harping on how I said it. He was annoying at times, always a bit loud, but he could say or do whatever he felt like with no reservations, easily breaking through my walls like no other could. Not even my own sister. I was honestly a bit jealous.
Ridoc wouldn’t let me fade either, prodding me to talk with him while the others were occupied in their own conversations. His voice usually quieter in those moments when he was trying to get me to reconnect, asking the oddest questions about whatever I was working on. It worked though, making my mind settle as I answered whatever he’d asked me, the casual back and forth grounding me, easing my anxiety over messing up.
He could see me. Really see me, like nobody ever had. It didn’t take me long to understand though, as I quickly became interested in trying to figure him out. Nobody really saw him either. Seeing what he wanted them to see. The loud, boisterous, sexually overconfident man he let everyone see wasn’t all of him. He didn’t let them see his worry over schoolwork, or over whatever current obstacle we were being thrown as new riders (currently the gauntlet) or his disappointment when a night of fun never became anything more, even if his conquest came back, it was never more than for another round. It was such a carefully crafted act that nobody thought to ask questions, nobody seeing that there was even an act to catch.
Nobody could see. But I could. And he knew I could, giving me a knowing smile in his moments of weakness, but I never knew what to say to make it better. I don’t really think he wanted any sympathy, hence the mask that mirrored my own. He interested me though, so completely different than the others. Even though that’s what he wanted, I could never truly look away. Not when he’d become my biggest source of safety in this death college.
Always pushing me on the mat, giving me pointers on how to improve. Walking with me when I needed a moment, my body feeling restless. Talk about my books, even the smutty ones, maybe especially the smutty ones. He’d grin and let me talk for hours, sitting on his bed in the men’s dormitory as we talked quietly. He’d glare at any of the other men who looked at us too long, daring them to say something. To make one move towards me. None ever did. And he always listened, asking questions that actually made me think, or that would lead me to another tangent.
Ridoc Gamlyn was an enigma I could barely understand, so I too hung around. Maybe it was the same for him. Maybe we were both just trying to figure the other out, never quite getting there. Never quite understanding. But accepting. Always accepting.
“I think, maybe you could bounce back and forth up the chimney. Your joints aren’t as weak as Violet’s so if you get enough speed and momentum…” He trailed off, as he watched me nudge my sausage across my plate. “Y/N?”
I met his warm brown eyes for a moment before my eyes quickly returned to my plate, torturing my sausage again. “I get what you’re saying. It’s worth a try.” It was presentation day, and this was my last try after all. Violet had told me her plan, but it wouldn’t work for me. If both of us pushed the rules like that, then one of us would definitely be disqualified. It was her plan, so I told her I’d already found another way. Lied through my teeth, but she’d let it go so it must’ve been convincing enough.
“C’mon, you’ll make it.” He assured, like there was no possibility I wouldn’t. “After all, my best friend isn’t a weakling.”
The twisting in my gut wasn’t unfamiliar, it happened every time he mentioned us as being friends. Why? I wasn’t quite sure, and it was one of the few things I refused to ruminate on. I refused any negative emotion when it came to Ridoc, too afraid to let anything take hold and then let the emotions push away my only solace in this place.
“Yeah.” I sighed. Then forced a smile as I met his gaze again, holding it this time. “Just want it to be over with.”
He smiled, moving some hair out of my face, the annoying strand of hair that always refused to stay in my crown of braids. “I know you do. And you’re gonna kick ass, and then in two days, we’re gonna get dragons and be certified badasses.” He sent me a big grin and I sighed, looking away to hide the smile blooming on my lips. I speared the sausage on my fork and plopped it in my mouth, finishing my breakfast.
“Yeah, yeah. Can’t get rid of me that easy.” I joked and with a quick glance from the corner of my gaze I saw his smile widen.
“Exactly Sorrengail. You’re stuck with me. Forever.” I laughed, before standing, Ridoc quickly following me. “Besides, I haven’t heard about the end of that dark romance you’ve been reading. It’s just started getting good. And I won’t have the patience to read it myself if you go and die on me.”
“Glad to see I have some use.” I snorted at him, my body relaxing the moment we’d gotten to the hall. The noise of the cafeteria fading the further we got from it. Finally, I could actually hear myself think now.
“Oh don’t be like that! You’re smarter than Violet, and that’s saying something.” He said and I rolled my eyes.
“No, I just watch more than she does. It’s easier to put things together when I don’t have to worry about holding a conversation at the same time.” I countered and he chuckled, pinching my side and making me squirm away. I still giggled against my will though. “Plus the photographic memory helps.” I snorted out another laugh when he poked me again. “Stop that!”
“Okay. Okay.” He relented, giving me a goofy grin and shoving his hands in his pockets. I knew that was the only way he’d be able to not touch me as he tried to honor my wishes. Ridoc never really could seem to keep his hands to himself when he was near me. Especially when he was nervous. “Don’t discount yourself though. You’re brilliant. Own it.”
“Shut it Gamlyn. I’ve got enough to worry about.” I sighed, taking in his expression before bumping his shoulder with my own. “Don’t need to worry about me okay? I won’t die today.”
The anxiety in his eyes faded, replaced with all consuming warmth as I was stuck in his gaze. He opened the door ahead of us, not saying a thing.
Ridoc’s POV
I held the door for her, warmth pulling at me as her gaze never faltered. I believed her, after all, it wasn’t often that she lied to me. In fact, she was usually unabashedly honest with me. A fact I was grateful for. She hid herself from the rest of our friends, her sister, but couldn’t hide from me.
Her brilliant mind fascinated me, she was amazing in her own unique ways. How the others couldn’t see it was beyond me. She was definitely the strongest, and smartest of us. I just wish they could see that, that she could see that, just once. She finally rolled her eyes, moving through the door as her cheeks went pink and my chest swelled with pride.
She was beautiful, in every way, and I'd been hopelessly pining after her since that first night when we’d been assigned to the same squad. When she’d finally met my gaze with those pretty y/e/c eyes of hers, catching me in a trance as she looked through me. Past my confident facade, straight to my core, past all the bullshit I wore like armor. But then she didn’t call me out like most would have, just cocked an eyebrow at me, and looked away. Like it was some secret that she was electing to keep for me.
I’d been practically begging for her attention since, especially after I’d figured out that she was pretending too. That she hid herself, afraid of the inevitable rejection too. But she didn’t play pranks, pretend to be stupid and refuse any feelings too painful to address. No she refused everyone, never letting anybody too close to be able to hurt her. Only letting the rest of our friends close enough to see what she deemed the useful parts of herself, but never close enough for them to really see her. But she let me. And I knew it was because she saw our similarities.
I was broken from my thoughts when we made it to the gauntlet, and fear seized my heart. As quickly as it’d taken over, it was gone because Y/N shoved my shoulder with hers again, sending me a bright smile.
“We’ve got this Ridoc.” It was simple, yet wholly convincing.
“We’ve got this.” I repeated, squeezing my hands into fists in my pockets to keep them still. To keep them from pulling her into my arms, and never letting go.
Y/N’s POV
I made it. I fucking made it! Shock seized me as Ridoc’s bellows rang in my ears, not quite hearing it even though his words echoed through me. His arms were wrapped tightly around me, spinning me around as he held me in a bone crushing grip. He set me back on the ground but didn’t let go, burying his head in my shoulder.
“You made it.” He whispered, and I nodded, tears pricking in the corner of my eyes as emotion flooded through me. Everything was suddenly too much as I hid my face in his chest. Breathe in. Out. In. Out. In. Out.
“I made it.” I whispered back, squeezing him from where my arms were wrapped around his neck.
We made it through presentation as well. Though several of the less savory of our squad couldn’t say the same for themselves. None of the dragons really stood out to me, a hollow feeling in my chest as I walked off the flight field. I won’t be chosen. I knew none of those dragons would choose me, deep in my soul. I didn’t say anything though, not until I was sitting criss-cross with my back leaning on his pillows and headboard as I watched him sharpening his sword, talking about needing to be ready for threshing.
“Did you-“ I paused when he quieted and glanced up at me, “Did you feel any of their approval?” I asked, voice barely above a whisper.
“The dragons?” He asked, putting down the stone in his hand and setting the sword to the side. Damn him, he must’ve noticed my shift in mood, deciding to focus on me completely now. I nodded. He thought a moment, his face shifting into contemplation, a look I couldn’t help but find so handsome. “Not really. There was those greens that crowded your sister. But I was terrified of them. Maybe that brown one, towards the end, that was annoying the others? Rolling all around them. He was funny. But I don’t know, none of them really jumped out at me.”
He hadn’t been able to take his eyes off that brown. I remember following behind him, watching him as he had softly chuckled at the dragons antics. For him to have brought it up again…maybe he was just lying to me, or himself, but he’d definitely had a connection to that dragon. My heart dropped.
He must’ve seen it too because he sighed, before crawling over and wrapping his arms around me as he pulled me into his side, and I leaned my head on his chest. “You are gonna get a dragon tomorrow. I just know it. Maybe your dragon just isn’t sure about you yet.”
“Comforting.” I snorted, voice devoid of emotion.
“Look, I know I haven’t convinced you, and you’ll be thinking some awful things about yourself now.” He paused, sighing and looking unsure of himself as he tried to find the right words to soothe me. Failing, but he’s cute, trying like that. “Just trust that I know, more than I’ve known anything that you will get a dragon tomorrow. If any of us deserves one, it’s you.”
The raw honesty in his voice made my heart race, and despite myself, his words gave me an inkling of hope. Hope that he was right. That there really was a dragon out there who could accept me, despite my shortcomings. Hope that a dragon would find me worthy.
“Thanks Ridoc.” I mumbled, and hoped that he’d hold me just a little longer as I worked to pull myself back together.
He did.
Ridoc’s POV
I wandered the woods, my mind occupied with Y/N and her show of weakness last night. She never let the facade fall that completely before, she was scared. More scared than she’d been for the gauntlet. Afraid a dragon wouldn’t want her. I frowned as I hid behind a tree as a red passed by. I knew that one wasn’t mine, but luckily it either hadn’t noticed me or decided to spare me instead.
I’d felt a tug all afternoon as I wandered the forest, coaxing me further and further inwards, where I knew that brown was waiting. I’d meant what I said last night, it’d only been once I’d left my friends that I felt the tug. But Y/N had caught what I hadn’t last night, in that way that only she does, already knowing the brown had intended on choosing me.
I finally started moving again, lost thinking about Y/N. Too lost to notice the forest shifting in front of me, until a deep male voice rang through my head, ‘Oh come on! You didn’t even notice me!”
I jumped back two feet, suddenly seeing two large golden eyes staring at me from a large brown swordtail that was hanging from a particularly large tree. A tree that still looked like it was about to buckle under the weight of him.
“S-sorry.” I stuttered out.
The brown jumped from the tree, landing on the ground and sending me staggering from the shockwaves. ‘I suppose I’ll forgive you. Only cause you’re so worried about her. Call me Aotrom, I’ll give you my full name later. You’re mine now.’ He sniffed at me as he circled me, before settling in front of me again, looking proud of himself.
“You mean Sorrengail? Y/N?” I specified, remembering Violet was out here too.
The dragon made a sound, that sounded suspiciously like a snort. ‘Who else? Your mate of course.’
My body froze as my mouth fell open in shock. “She’s not! We’re not-“ I shook my head. “She’s my friend.”
He tilted his head, looking confused. ‘Oh? I thought…’ He sounded confused too, thinking, before his face lit up again, tail wagging back and forth. ‘I see! Eve did say she thought you two hadn’t acted on it yet when I shared my memories with her. I guess she’s right!’
My mind was swimming. This-my dragon, Aotrom, was unlike any other dragon we’d learned about. That was for sure. And he thought me and Y/N were mates??? “Who’s Eve?” I finally let the words out and the dragon puffed his chest out as he straightened with obvious pride.
‘My mate of course.’
Y/N POV
I kept a hand over my mouth as an orange slinked by, sniffing the air. I willed my traitorous heart to slow, afraid that the nasty looking dragon would hear my heartbeats and try to eat me. Eventually he slinked out of view, and I let out a small breath as I continued on my way.
I still felt that hollowness. No pull anywhere as I wandered around aimlessly. I’d run into a dozen different dragons now, and felt nothing from any of them.
I silently wondered if Ridoc had found that brown swordtail. I wondered if Rhi and Violet had found theirs too. If Sawyer would finally get his own. If I would be forced to repeat the year as well, and start over next year.
I paused when I heard a rustling in the bushes, but before I could hide, one of the other cadets strode out. It was one that hung by Barlow, not in his inner circle but itching to move his way in and appease the cruel man. He was tall and fit, definitely a foot taller than me. I palmed my daggers as he stared at me, cruel grin forming as he looked me up and down.
“The quiet Sorrengail twin.” He hissed and I glared.
“Won’t earn you any points with Barlow killing me.” By sheer will my voice was strong.
“Oh, but it will weaken her, and Barlow will approve of that if he hasn’t killed her by the end of the day.” My heart raced at his words as I steeled myself for the fight ahead of me. He wasn’t backing down now.
He ran four steps raising his sword and was about to swing when air rushed around me, and then suddenly he was lifted off the ground, a giant scorpion tail sticking out his back and through his chest. With a flick of the tail his body flew behind me.
But I was frozen in fear. Standing in front of me was a dragon, with navy blue scales and bright green eyes narrowed on me, assessing. Waiting for what my response would be. It’s tail moved slowly now, curling around its body, which gave me some hope that this dragon didn’t plan on killing me. Yet at least.
“Thank you.” I whispered, lowering my gaze as my thoughts went wild. There weren’t supposed to be any blues out here today.
‘I came because my mate wished to take a rider, that’s all.’ Her voice was majestic, beautiful and commanding, filling my head and making my eyes snap back to hers. She was talking to me…but that meant… ‘Yes, Strategist, I agree with my mate’s assessment. You are worthy of being mine, despite your worries. He may have been selfish, having chosen his own already, but he had assured me that you would do me proud young warrior. Now, climb on, before I change my mind.’
She chuffed out a puff of air in my face and I chose not to argue and climb atop the small blue dragon. She wasn’t the smallest of the ones we’d seen during presentation, but she definitely wasn’t the largest, I noted as I climbed on top of her.
She grumbled. ‘I am only 21!’ She hissed out the words irritated with my…thoughts. Great she can read my mind. ‘I will grow with time! I’ll be bigger than Aunt Sgaeyl even! Just you watch!’
So don’t mention her size. Noted. Wait, Sgaeyl? Riorson’s dragon???
‘My name is Eventhasil, but you may refer to me as Eve.” Then she was launching into the air not a second after I had thoroughly settled into the seat, ignoring my mental question of her lineage. I gripped her tightly with my thighs, hanging on for dear life. Once she leveled out, not jostling me at all anymore, I was able to actually enjoy the wind flowing through my hair. Joy flooded me and tears welled up again. I was actually chosen.
‘That is a habit we will have to kill with prejudice. Your doubt in yourself is sickening.’ Though her words were harsh, I think that was supposed to be encouraging.
‘What about your mate?’ I asked, changing the subject. ‘What’s he like? Who has he chosen?’ It would be nice to know exactly which cadet I’m now tied to for the rest of my life.
‘He approaches.’ She says simply, her voice going quiet as she speeds up, forcing me to hold tighter as a brown tried to catch up. Were they…racing? ‘Yes, and if Aotrom wins he’ll be insufferable. Hold tight.’ Determination laced her tone as she tightened her movements racing towards the flight field at top speed, easily outflying the brown as she flung her wings out at the last minute, landing quickly. I was nearly flung from my seat with the maneuver, but with luck and my muscles locking, I was able to hold on. The brown landed thirty seconds later, towering over Eve as he snapped at her face playfully. She snapped back at him, narrowly missing his neck as her tail swung behind us.
But then another dragon landed on her other side and the brown lurched forward, growling low in his throat as he eyed the other male, his swordtail curling around Eve protectively.
She, however, sat calmly amidst his display of possessiveness. Almost…bored?
‘Overpossessive male.’ She explained, irritation lacing her tone. ‘Male dragons are known to be volatile towards any potential threats in the first few years of establishing a mate bond. And Aotrom is very…determined to keep me as his.’ An obvious affection was laced in her last words. The other male backed away, submitting to Aotrom’s dominance and claim, eyes and head down as he moved out of range. Only when the male had moved a sufficient distance away and Aotrom relaxed, turning to his mate again did I see his rider. Ridoc. Holy shit! Ridoc!
Happiness bubbled within me. There was no one better to be tied to! Holy shit. And he looked unharmed, thank the gods.
‘Go speak with him.’ Eve somehow sounded…teasing? ‘He’s relieved that Aotrom had told the truth when he told him that you were safe. As if I’d ever let harm come to what’s mine.’ She snorted at the last sentence and I laughed.
‘I’m glad he’s okay too.’ I sent her way as I climbed down.
The moment my feet hit the ground they lifted again, as Ridoc’s arms wrapped around me and swung me around. “We both got dragons! We’re both riders!” His voice was full of joy as he put me on my feet again. “We made it Y/N! We made it!” His hands moved to my cheeks, and I was frozen as euphoria took over his gaze, and then in a split second, his mouth was on mine.
Moving, kissing, me. I slowly moved back holding onto the moment as my heart burst. My crush was kissing me. Tongue slipping into my mouth as he pulled me to him, pine and male and Ridoc taking over my senses completely as I lost myself in him.
This moment was perfection.
And then it was ruined, by Sawyer calling our names, obviously not able to really see us yet. Ridoc jumped back, looking panicked and my heart lurched. Did he not mean to do that? His eyes scanned mine as he backed up.
“Talk later?” He asked, and I froze. He froze too, hands hovering over my waist. “Y/N? Talk later yeah?”
I nodded, words catching in my throat as Eve growled in my mind. But she said nothing.
“Yeah.” I whispered, putting on a smile as our friend greeted us.
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