Hi friends! Been a while since I've posted fanfic, but here I am! @oftachancer and I wrote a piece for 30daysofdorian that will be posted in 20 segments from May 1-20. Each day, a piece will be posted at 7:00 PM EST on my blog.
This fic goes through a series of (pre-inquisition) vignettes and memories inspired by Major Arcana cards, as Rilienus tries to unravel the blood magic ritual that's wrapped around Dorian's mind. I've tried to cw tag the sections of the fic that are particularly dark or have certain content, so feel free to skip those.
If you'd like to follow the fic, subscribe to the #major arcana fic tag. I'll try to update the links on this post daily when each part goes live. The overall fic is about ~18-20k.
I would like to say- I know I am not on Tumblr much (because I spend most of my time either working or writing)- but I would like to say an enormous thank you to all of the wonderful people who have been reading our work. Seriously, the responses that @midnightprelude and I have received in answer to Pour Forth Thy Soul In Ecstasy in particular have been some of the most wonderful I have read. If I had a book jacket to just have āhigh literature smutā on, I would! We donāt write for the comments, but gosh itās nice to read them. š„°
If youād like to read any of our other work - or any of the completed works that we have in the pipeline - find us on AO3. I also have a co-written series with @johaeryslavellan called Playground Love which has its own share of high literature smut. š¤š
scene from Minrathous, Dorian POV fic about his pre-Trespasser visit home
In Dorianās lap is a very old manuscript, bound together with other documents to form the substance of a book called Philosophies, Miscellaneous and Sundry. It's the sort of rare, unique item that an altus can't acquire without searching for it in private libraries, provided he's got the connections to make that happen. And, as it turns out, Dorian does still have some connections. He hasn't burned every bridge behind him. And of the bridges he did burn ā some of them rather spectacularly ā a few have been miraculously rebuilt, thanks to his close association with the Inquisition and the power it wields.
The manuscript itself is called A Treatise on the Topic of Slavery and the Moral Imperative of the Banishment Thereof. So, yes. He's here for a month with no Lord Inquisitor Trevelyan around to keep him delightfully occupied in the ars erotica, and instead he's been diving into some fun, light reading.
That's a joke, of course ā his own delightfully sardonic sense of humor, at it again. It's dense and terribly boring reading, in fact, but it's necessary. He intends to school himself in the history of Tevinter's several failed anti-slavery movements ā the records of which are now mostly lost and destroyed. But it's possible to find a few writings here and there if you're diligent. And Dorian has been diligent. He knows he'll be wise to learn the history if he wants to avoid the mistakes of the past and start an abolition movement that can actually succeed. And that is what he wants. Real change around here. Not more of the same. If he has to start agitating for change from afar ā while remaining comfortably ensconced in the south at Trevelyan's side ā then that's precisely what he'll do.
This particular volume came to him by way of Rilienus ā well, Rilienus' wife, actually. Because he has one of those now, and she's lovely ā a clever, forthright woman, who above all else wants a pleasing life for herself and her husband ā which means they've been supportive friends to each other, all the while taking lovers of the gender they each prefer. To assuage the rest of their elite social circle, she's been fabricating all sorts of medical excuses for why she hasn't yet fallen pregnant.
"The healers aren't sure what's wrong with me. But we still have hope."
That's how she put it last week, when she and Rilienus ushered him into the beautiful library that used to belong to her parents. She sounded every bit the contrite, beleaguered wife, but she exchanged a knowing smile with her husband, and it was abundantly clear that they'd never touched each other ā not in any way that would disgust them both. Good for them, of course ā defying a marriage consummation that neither of them wanted ā and yet it worried Dorian to hear it.
"Dangerous gambit, if you're caught."
"We couldn't all leave Tevinter to find safety in the south," Rilienus said, looking wistful for a moment, then hiding it away again. "Speaking of which, what's he like, this Inquisitor of yours?"
"Heard the rumors, have you?"
"Just a few," Rilienus said, but then he grinned, bold and wolfish, suggesting that yes, in fact, he'd heard quite a lot of them.
And Dorian knew just the sort of answer he was looking for.
"He's a southern mage, so you know what that means ā woefully under-educated in advanced theoretical magic. Spectacular with battlemagic, though, I'll give him that. And he spent many years enjoying the company of men in his Circle of Magi ā a permissive one, I'm told, for the south. So he knows what he's doing in the bedroom, at least."
"Good for you, then."
"Yes," Dorian said, "it's been very good for both of us."
That was all Rilienus wanted ā the answer to the politely-left-unspoken question 'how's the sex?' And Dorian didn't mind telling him enough to satisfy that base curiosity. The rest of it, he kept to himself. It would serve no purpose ā except a hurtful one ā if he were to talk about the depth of his feelings for Trevelyan ā the respect and regard between them, the love and affection. Not to mention Dorian's easy use of that treasured word, 'amatus,' which no altus living in Tevinter would ever dare to speak the way he speaks it: lovingly, one man to another.
As the hour grew late and his wife retired with her lady friend, Rilienus made it clear he wasn't expecting any visitors of his own.
"Can I tempt you to stay the night?"
"No," Dorian said, without giving it a second thought. "Not anymore. But thank you for the offer."
And for the second time that evening, Rilienus looked wistful, though he banished it promptly with a friendly smile.
"Well, you're always welcome to call on me. And so is your Trevelyan if ever he's here with you. I'd love to meet him."
"Yes." Dorian chuckled. "I bet you would."
Before opening the door to go, he turned and reached out to clasp Rilienus' hand, squeezing it once and then letting go.
"Look out for yourself, please," he said. "I don't have enough old friends that I can afford to lose any."
And then he left, taking only the book with him and returning all alone to his fancy rented townhouse, easily paid for by the Inquisition's coffers.
One Of Those Days, by @lavalampelfchild, was a really lovely piece about homesickness, and about missing someone, and missing what could have been. I wanted to write something about that from the other side - because Dorian may miss Tevinter, but Tevinter also misses him. This is mostly little canon and a whole lot of conjecture, but... eh. Hope you enjoy? My last piece for the Dragon Age Remix Fest.
Somewhere in Minrathous, the first son of a house too noble for its own good is walking the streets, his robes growing steadily more sodden in the rare rain. He should care about that and the fact that it would be worth something to kidnap him, that the streets can be dangerous after dark, but his mindās on other things.
The Pavus boyās gone, theyāve been sayingā and never mind that theyāre talking about a man of thirty, youāre always a boy when youāre only measured by your parents and the magic in their line, the wealth theyāve acquired, the names they know. Off to join those southern heretics. As if being the family shame wasnāt enough for him.
There have been rumours whispered in corners and discussed over wine, laughter badly muffled by robe sleeves. Always was an odd boy, that one, when he wasnāt being a drunken sot. Perhaps this is due to that little dispute with his father -
He thinks it over, hands straying to adjust the focusing crystal of his staff as he walks. He pretended to be surprised, but he isnāt. Not really. Dorian was never one for shutting up and falling into step with everyone else; that would have made him less interesting. Itās good to know that that hasnāt changed.
Itās been a long time, but there are plenty of things he remembers. He remembers a wry voice, but the anger behind it, burning fierce and hot, bright no matter how hard the man tried to hide it.Ā They think we donāt know. They reek of blood magic, canāt you sense it? The Veilās fluttering like a torn handkerchief around them with every step they take, and theyāre just smirking and telling the younger ones, āYes, keep up your studies, because with discipline and practiseĀ someday you might be as powerful.ā As if theyāre worth admiring.Ā
That bitter laughter, so quiet and often wine-soaked; and even with the alcohol, quiet was dangerous, when it was Dorian. It meant the man was planning, calculating, working out problems in his head. It meant the rage was building until it would be unleashed, perhaps explosively.
He remembers laughing eyes and long, steady fingers on the stem of a wine glass, because Dorian was rarely as drunk as he pretended to be ā and heād discovered that after heād glanced around and realised he was watching the Pavusā son, the half-drunk thaumaturgical genius in the corner of a family party, soaking ink into a silk handkerchief. Heād watched the Pavus heir pass restless fingers over it, shaping magic, watched ink become absentminded, hasty equations and notes, and thought, Oh. And then Pavus had looked up, as if sensing his interest, and their eyes had met.
ā¦Oh, heād thought again, more significantly, swallowing.
He remembers papers covered with manically scribbled calculations and muttered swearing in a half-dark study, and Dorian looking up, those bright eyes landing on him. I didnāt think youād still be awake.
He remembers taking the other seat at the desk and saying cheerfully, We have to stop meeting like this.
You took the words right out of my mouth. A genuine smile, not the fierce thing full of teeth and rage used for the magisters and the jumped-up noblesā sons. Stop that, by the way, or Iāll have no wit left. Iāll have to rely on my glorious visage to daze people until I can run for it.
A lie. Dorian was never one for running. He remembers finding Dorian spitting out blood, face nearly a snarl, and The bastard called my fatherā¦ Well, itās not worth repeating. He remembers that, so many times: my father, said with fondness as if the man were an oddity, with impotent frustration, with a faint air of mockery ā but always with that quiet pride, something like respect. Or... reverence, perhaps.
He remembers numbing that split lip with a little ice magic. Dorian looking at him, eyes wide and dark in the firelight, and saying quietly, with that raw, frightened honesty in it, Why are you still here?
Because someone has to be. And heād nearly leaned forwards, done something foolish, but there had been a clatter outside and the door had flown open ā he doesnāt even remember what it was, now, probably some alchemical disaster or that time Laius had managed to set the philosophy section on fire, and ā
He remembers that dark, sad laughter again, as they sat up at a time when anyone sane should have been asleep, and Dorian saying, Do you ever hate the Imperium? Seeing his surprise at the question, Dorian had continued, Not that I mind the architecture, and the fashionās entertaining. Butā¦ there must be something more. More than backstabbings and blood magic and making sure your amulet is bigger than everyone elseās. If I everā¦ And there was a rare hint of hesitance, and Dorian all but swigged his wine before he said, If I ever found someone, I would want to give them something better than this. Iād want to show them that there was more to life. Sometimes I just want toā¦ run. To go off and eat grapes in Orlais somewhere, or freeze my backside off in some Fereldan shack if it means that I donāt have to stop slouching, Dorian, and remember that you are representing House Pavus, Dorian, and you must excel, because mediocrity is unbefitting of one of our line, the magic runs strong, Dorianā¦ Do you think anyone would? Justā¦ leave it all for something like freedom?
Heād swallowed, wide-eyed. Itāsā¦ a lot to ask. It would be a lot to lose.
Iād be worth it. Have you seen this face? And then Dorian had laughed and things had turned to lighter topics, but the quietness, that barely-hidden sadness had been there, too.
He remembers the slow drift away, later, the demands of bloodlines and Circles and society, but for a moment...
He grins to himself, there in the rain, and knows he probably looks Fade-touched. Congratulations, he thinks, even now. You finally got away.
He would have said yes. Not that it matters now, but... he would have said yes.
Somewhere in Ferelden, the only son of House Pavus, the man who could have been Archon, makes his way through a freezing fortress and ignores the blisters from a truly exhausting fight in the mountains. Dorian tries not to sigh, and thinks that itās been far too long since heās got his hands on any decent wineā¦
āLike lead to gold,ā a quiet voice says behind him, and he half-jumps, glaring at Cole. Cole, who carries on, unperturbed, āIt canāt change back, though it almost wants to, but this isā¦ better. Braver.ā
āWhat are you - ?ā he starts.
Cole says, unperturbed, āYouāre different now, Dorian.ā
Dorian blinks at that, and tries to think of something witty, his throat dry and an ache in his chest - no, less an ache than a warmth. āYes,ā is all he manages to say, the words quiet and surprised. āI think I am.ā
cause weāre young and weāre reckless // itāll leave you breathless or with a nasty scar
i generally love how haunting this cover is, i feel it really works to set up a particularly narrative playlist
years & years - memoĀ
let me take your heart // love you in the dark // no-one has to see
they could fuck without consequence, but men falling in love? tevinter wonāt let it last
florence + the machine - what kind of manĀ
you were on the other side like always // you could never make you mine
dorianās 100% in, his first love, and rilienus is more cagey, on and off, unsure what he wants and dorian gets the brunt of that indecision
the weeknd - secretsĀ
it's a lie, a lie // iĀ catch you every time // In your lust, your lust // very time you close your eyes
imagine dorian lying there next to a sleeping rilienus, knowing heās got other lovers, wanting desperately to believe he means it when he says dorian is the one he wants in the end, feeling foolish for wanting this at all
susanna and the magical orchestra - love will tear us apart (cover)
why is the bedroom so cold // turned away on your side? // is my timing that flawed // our respect run so dry?Ā
for this narrative i went with the relationship being not great, and descending into a little codependency and unhealthiness. because i love angst and i love to let my faves suffer
marina and the diamonds - obsessionsĀ
i want to wipe out all the sad ideas // that come to me when i am holding you
maybe rilienus is a realist - he knows it canāt work. dorian should know this, surely? dorian is an idiot for thinking he can have it - it doesnāt matter whether they deserve it or not. this is tevinter
scarling. - broken recordĀ
you're watching my face // my tears are a strain // your heart makes a fist // and it's bruising my brain
this is just a playlist so itās easy to interpret a relationship that turns undeniably abusive, and i was definitely positioning rilienus as terrible, but also heās a young man also growing up in tevinter knowing it can never work, with a dorian who is recklessly himself, with no mind to the consequences of trying to live the life he wants
birdy - words as weaponsĀ
you have my heart but i lock it up // this burning flame has been burnt enough
dorian, in love, realises in increments and with backslides of feeling that rilienus is never going to give him what he wants. heās never going to run away with him, or make a stand in tevinter, heās never going to stop hiding
the national - terrible loveĀ
but I won't follow you // into the rabbit hole // iĀ said i would // but then i saw // your shivered bones // they didn't want me to
rock bottom, when dorian finally realises itās not working and he canāt do this, that both he and rilienus need this to be cover. i actually really love the birdy cover of this but i didnāt want two songs by the same artist on the mix
unkle bob - swans
you tell me that you love me // but you never want to see me again
dorianās always going to have a place in him for rilienus, for a first love, but god is he a terrible person
little may - seven hoursĀ
you said sheās all you ever needed // weāre just strangers with copper bindings // need you to give me back my lungs // so my body can forgive me slow
i imagine rilienus, like dorian, had a prearranged betrothal all this time, and this is the point where i imagine rilienus wanting to rekindle things, but as an extramarital affair, and dorian canāt do that, he wonāt be that man
daughter - smotherĀ
i want all that is not mine // iĀ want him but we're not right
he knows itās over, but the heart is unquiet with thoughts of what ifs
first aid kit - ghost town
and i can see it now you're married // and your wife is with a child // and you're all laughing in the garden // and i'm lost somewhere in your mind
looking back at what rilienus became, and how it still hurts, wondering whether he still thinks about it. this song is on my solo dorian mix too because i love this aspect of his background, of the implication that thereās so much left unsaid with rilienus
I recently participated in two lovely exchanges and had yet to thank my amazing gifters and recommend their fics!
For the @black-emporium-exchange
The Sound of Silence by @ponticle
Pairing: Dorian x Anders
Rating: G
Word Count: 179
Summary: A beautiful, compact piece where Dorian reflects upon the realities of their long distance relationship.
Nugs on Fire by @barbex
Pairing: Dorian x Anders
Rating: T
Word Count: 2628
Summary: A delightful, flirty meet-cute where Dorian and co stumbles upon Anders during the Inquisition timeline.
Rules of conduct by @darethshirl
Pairing: Dorian x Anders x M!Hawke
Rating: E
Word Count: 6343
Summary: Dorian stumbles upon the Champion and his lover... well... loving in the library. Awkwardness ensues, until they make it very, very not awkward.
Even in misfortune, good can be found by emocsibe
Pairing: Dorian x Anders x Fenris
Rating: T
Word Count: 22,940
Summary: An amazing longfic exploring Anders' and Fenris' relationship to each other after they arrive at Skyhold to confront the Inquisitor about Hawke. Dorian and Anders find a way to punch through the Fade and then everyone falls in love. <3
No victory in silence by little abyss
Pairing: Dorian x Rilienus
Rating: M
Word Count: 494
Summary: At his damned engagement party, Rilienus discovers that Dorian has left Tevinter.
All you have is your fire by @hazelestelle
Pairing: Dorian x Anders
Rating: G
Word Count: 1013
Summary: Dorian arrives late to another of Anders' talks, but it turns out much, much better than he thought it would.
For @a-paragon-of-their-kind
A funny thing happened by @lavalampelfchild
Pairing: Male Cadash/Dorian Pavus, Thorold Tethras/Maevaris Tilani, Dorian & Mae, Dorian & Varric, Varric & Mae, suggested Alistair/F!Cadash
Rating: T
Word Count: 5841
Summary: A delightful meet-cute with SO MUCH political talk in the Ambassadoria. I was truly stunned that you could put SO MANY of my requests into one gift!
Practical demonstrations by @jarakrisafis
Pairing: Dorian x Varric
Rating: M
Word Count: 430
Summary: Dorian helps Varric with some stickier spots in his smutty literature.
Politics of the heart by toshi-nama
Pairing: F!Cadash x Alistair
Rating: T
Word Count: 1061
Summary: Alistair and Nadya talk through the realities of ruling Ferelden.
Tagged by @noire-pandora this week, thank you! Tagging on to @merrybandofmurderers, @blarrghe, @viscariadraws, and @hoiist!
Iām not sure Iāve posted anything from this work, but itās post-canon inquisitor Anders who married Dorian and then through various circumstances they meet an old flame of Dorianāsā¦
Rilienus set the pot aside, meandering over to the base of the ladder to look up into the branches.
Anders lifted up on his toes, reaching up to cut lavender vines that curled around the interior branches, dropping his collection into his basket. A wide-brimmed sun hat protected his fair skin from the harsh rays of the sun, loose cream-colored linen flowing over his shoulders.
āThatās for curing hallucinations, yes?ā Rilienus asked, leaning against the trunk. Lean. Like a slender, supple branch. āSeeing double?ā
Anders squeaked, not unlike a mouse, dropping his shears and his basket, the ladder rocking as boots scrabbled for purchase, finally toppling over and taking the man with it.
Rilienus whistled sharply, halting all the objects - mage included - a foot off the grass. āGood afternoon.ā
