"a death in the family" is a culmination of many frustrations and insecurities of jay; frustrations and insecurities that would come to light one way or another. jay is angry, yes. he's grieving, he's disappointed, he's scared, he's traumatised, he's lost when it comes to his role as robin and a son, he simultaneously thinks bruce is not doing enough to achieve justice and that he only cares about beating up criminals, he wants his mom, he fights like he has "a death wish"-- and it all spans throughout a couple of days; if you include garzonas' case, which was a trigger for this sudden (when it comes to the sheer intensity of it) breakdown, it's maybe 2/3 weeks at most.
what i'm trying to say, is that it's all based on very real concerns but also that these concerns never took this shape before. they never overlapped to such an extent. jay did not have a long-term issue with trusting bruce before; he did not cry every single night thinking of his parents; he did not think bruce was too busy fighting crime to talk to him; he did not question his place in the family on every step. for all we know, garzonas' case is also the first time jay feels that helpless during an investigation.
it is, in a way, just a very bad week. you know that feeling when you're 14/15, and something shitty just happened, and a family member or a friend says something, and you snap at them and think, or maybe even say-- why are you always like that. and it's not all true, or maybe it is, but it never truly bothered you before. it's also nothing that cannot be fixed or talked about, but you're upset now, and that now feels too much like forever, and when you start thinking about it, that's only one of many many issues you never really considered before, and it's too much to deal at once with, and even if you wanted, you already feel as if it wouldn't work.
it's not merely a hyperbole; some of these things will perhaps hurt a bit forever. but some others are salvageable. some were a lie your anxious brain invented. probably most of them you can live with. of course, the problem is that it doesn't seem to be the case at that specific moment.
and i think this is what jay's anger and despair were in these final week(s); not some great universal truth uncovered. not a complete delusion. just one of these times when everything is too much.
there has to be some nuance in reading aditf because of that. the reader should recognise jay's anguish, but this anguish should not overwrite all the love and trust that jay had for bruce otherwise. there's so much going on there and none of it can be told as a story of absolutes.
