In and of itself, Nowhere is the prophecy that Ivan has written for himself, one of self destruction. Fitting for one of the most tragic characters in this show, the one whose love was requited but who never let it be anything due to his own stubbornness and blindness. Not only that but the way that he thinks of himself, as a monster who only serves to hurt those who he loves, is something that proves not to be true, necessarily, but it proves to be true through Ivan's twisted worldview as he hurt Sua by making fun of her sacrifice and he hurt Till by kissing him at the worst possible time. This song, Ivan's first solo since Black Sorrow, echoes that in being another self-fulfilling prophecy of Ivan's, another lie that he told himself so many times that he made it come true.
The repetition of musical elements such as the lifting scale of chimes, the swing of the instrumentals, the snare and percussion being pretty much the same every time only adding to the sensation of mounting foreboding up and up, a rising action that continues to rise but never truly reaches a climax, no culmination, no conclusion until death. My friend Zen (@verdantlights) called it eerie, and I agree. The way that the song all comes together, it feels like a tragedy unfolding in front of you, over and over, one that you know will happen and yet you can do nothing to prevent. It's almost like the "tainted history" that Ivan talks of, the repetition of events again and again over time, the way that history seems to be cyclical and we, as humans, never seem to truly learn.
In certain ways, the song is about the way that the perceived reality of the world and the world's actual reality are very, very different things. Considering the line about "a stiff dream dyed in rose-colored hues" that slowly changed to a dream dyed purple, to a dream dyed black, it is the way that when we are children we are able to hope for a better future than the one we think will actually come and how as we age, we are traumatized by the world to the point where we can no longer hope for anything better. Becoming someone who dismisses hope because you've tried hoping before and you only ended up with a kick in the gut and a punch in the face, well, that's a trauma response. We are all slowly traumatized over time into believing that the world can't get better, our rose-colored dreams becoming purple until they finally fade to black, blotted out by the corruption of memory, those times when we dared to dream and we were shot down from out of the sky, our wax wings not even given the chance to melt. We are beaten down by life, over and over again, until we are simply forced to go through the routine that society demands of us and say that we are content (wake up, wake up to the usual routine & wake up, wake up to this beautiful life, is it for real?).
The worst part is that Ivan knows better (a dustlike existence can't open its eyes to look. I close my eyes). The whole reason why Ivan admires Till so much in the first place is his willingness to fight, his hope for a future without slavery for humans, his unadulterated and true love. Ivan knows what hope feels like and he knows that he just can muster it anymore, too exhausted to be anything other than apathetic (the wounds that kept reopening just became numb), but he can still love Till's vivacity and drive for change. Ivan views himself as something dirty, something broken that only serves to break others. He thinks that he's a monster who can only do the people he loves harm, and to a degree, that's true, his belief a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Ultimately though, Ivan is an immensely unreliable narrator, someone so biased against himself and towards literally anyone else but someone who is so stubborn that he is unwilling to believe anyone else's opinions on him because they have never met his "true self" only the mask that he wears that he ends up digging a deeper and deeper hole. He thinks of his story as one that's already written, the repetition of the line "this always happens to me" echoing that, especially with the way that eventually that song ends with it repeated again, "yeah, it's always like that, this always happens to me." Ivan isn't trying to fight it because his dream has long since been stained black, despite the fact that he knows that he could break out of this cycle of despair. He knows this prophecy that he is submitting to is one that he wrote himself and yet, where he stands right now? He has no will to change it.
note: My friend Ish (@chevalperd) screenshotted @/ivantill7089 (on twitter)'s english translation of this song for me, which is what I am referencing for the lyrics!
I love you Ish thank you again so much :3
warning!! this gets really long lmao - talking about themes in Arcane season two - arcane season two spoilers, kind of obvious but need to clarify. i dont talk about shipping in this at all btw! i have ships i like but like that's not here nor there, not relevant for this imo
I was watching an Arcane analysis video and while I wouldn't really go out on a limb and say that "I know what season two was about" like the themes and stuff because the themes found in a work are, inherently, going to be subjective and up to audience interpretation, and obviously, I'm not going to say that "I know Arcane's themes better than anyone else," I don't, that's not what this is about, but I would argue that season two does have a few universal themes. Some of those are carried over from season one, being relationships and love in general, what we are willing to do for love, but there are some that are focused on more so in season two than in season one.
This might have been said before- I don't really touch the analysis/meta side of the fandom, so I am sorry if I'm retreading old ground. Additionally, while I don't think that season two was nearly as perfect as season one, I enjoyed both and I think they were both solid, enjoyable seasons. The writing in season two was not immaculate but it was not bad, either. If not held in comparison to season one, I doubt it would be judged so harshly. Nevertheless, that's a whole other can of worms, and one that I would really rather not open.
Back to the themes- my argument is that, if season one is about siblings (sisters specifically), trauma, and change, then I would say that sacrifice, love, and the consequences of death, are the main themes in season two. These are all themes that are present in season one (Vander's sacrifice for Violet & Powder, the consequences of Vander & Silco's deaths, love is relevant w/pretty much everything) but they are focused on more heavily in season two.
These in particular are seen but not limited to Jinx's sacrifice for Vi at the very end, Heimerdinger's presumed sacrifice for Ekko, (the more sacrifice oriented ones), Jayce choosing to save Viktor, Caitlyn's fixation on Jinx and her descent into tyranny, Mel being forced to kill her mother, and Singed's obsession with keeping his daughter alive (the consequences of death).
These are the themes that stuck out to me as the biggest because, while there are the more philosophical, overarching ideas of fate and evolution and the multiverse, that's not really something that is widely accessible and they are themes, yes but they are not through-lines for every character. I mean, the fate one could be argued, General Medarda fated to be taken down by family, Jinx and Vander both fated to die, Viktor fated to fail (unable to achieve Hextech dream of helping the undercity, unable to achieve glorious evolution), etc etc, and I would say that fate is probably the trickiest of these themes to really dissect because it is carried out as expected as many times as it is subverted. It's also not really what I am trying to address here lmao
I would argue that there is the consistent theme of the consequences of death, which I know is a little bit of a long theme, themes are supposed to be one word most of the time, but I can't just say that this is the theme of "grief" because it's not just grief. It is about what people do in response to the death of their loved ones. Arguably, that could be what the whole season is about, really. Jinx is reeling at the death of Silco and her starting the war with topside, she has a death wish and she wants to "repent" in a way for killing Silco and for choosing to embrace being "Jinx" which is something she doesn't see any way of coming back from. She finds a will to live in Isha, who gives her a purpose and a reason to stay alive, and that gives her the ability to eventually attempt reconciliation with Vi. Caitlyn is screwed up over her mum's death, trying to maintain the relationships she once had in the face of all of her new responsibilities as well as the war looming, and with her preexisting obsession with Jinx being twisted by her mother's death, she wages war on Zaun and attempt to locate Jinx. In this manic grief, she forces Vi to make decisions that Vi isn't able to truly make (asking Vi to become an enforcer) and she kind of ends up burning all of her bridges, irrevocably changed by her trauma. Which, y'know, fair. At the same time, Vi is dealing with the death of "Powder", finally giving into Ekko's philosophy and vowing to hunt down her sister, which she isn't really able to do without Caitlyn there as a guiding light because Vi is fragile as it is, so when that relationship implodes, she throws herself into the deep end to avoid having to actually think about anything. That's interrupted by Jinx and then both of the sisters face a twisted version of their father, Vander, and try to process that.
Viktor is one of the most difficult ones because his story is so deepy intertwined with Jayce's, they have separate arcs but they are woven so closely together that they are nearly impossible to discuss without mentioning the other. Viktor is fatally injured by Jinx's missile and Jayce breaks his promise to destroy the Hexcore and using said Hexcore to save Viktor's life. This is two different sides of the "consequences of death" because one, Jayce's actions are the consequences of Viktor's temporary death, he acted rashly and in desperation, in a successful attempt to save Viktor's life but on the other hand, it gets into the consequences of death because, why was Viktor saved instead of anyone else, such as one of the council members? Why save Viktor instead of Caitlyn's mother? The consequences of Viktor's death was Jayce once again showing how devoted he is to Viktor specifically, against all odds, and choosing to defy death for someone he loves, which against the natural order of things and directly sets off a series of events that Heimerdinger warned of, and also, that Viktor was scared of.
When he returns, Viktor is himself but he is influenced heavily by the Hexcore, at the same time. He isolates himself and creates the utopia he dreamed of making with Hextech thanks to the powers of his Hexcore. He drives Jayce away on purpose, at first, but the more people who are added to the Hexcore, the more detached he becomes and the less he is trying to distance himself from Jayce. Jayce goes through the whole multiverse shenanigans and comes back grimy and determined to stop Viktor.
The arc for Jayce and Viktor in this season kind of mirrors Vi and Jinx, a bit, with the way that Jayce keeps choosing Viktor over and over, similarly to Vi choosing Jinx over and over, and like Vi hunting down Jinx, Jayce has a period where he turns against Viktor. At the same time, it's different, because it's almost as if this is the same arc that Jinx and Vi could have had if Vi did shoot Caitlyn and play along with Jinx's rules, because Jayce is finally absorbed into the Hexcore with everyone else and resolves most of Viktor's conflict by not giving up on Viktor. By choosing Viktor over everything else. By telling Viktor that even if he can't achieve his dreams, that doesn't make him broken, that his imperfections make him beautiful.
Ekko's story around the themes, I think, is more about the way that the butterfly effect works, how little choices make a big different, and how things could have gone if only things were different, as seen in his multiverse episode. That ties into the consequences of death via showing what could have happened if Vi were the one who died instead of Vander, how that would have impacted their family and their relationships, how it changed the trajectory of the plot overall. Additionally, Ekko is one of the characters grappling with the most grief at the very end, having lost Heimerdinger, who was a mentor to him, and Jinx, who he loved.
It's fascinating how Ekko's story shows specifically his response to loss (Heimerdinger) was to take action, make a practical choice. But also, he latches onto one of the most important people in his life who is still alive, Jinx, and while he is focused on saving the world, he's devoting a lot of effort to restoring Jinx, too, which isn't exactly the most practical decision he could be making. Jinx is notorious for her volatility and Ekko has seen that first hand, yet, he pulls her out of the gutter and will not let her give up. So, while he's more tertiary when it comes to sacrifice plots (Jinx and Heimerdinger) but when it comes to love and the consequences of death, he's pretty focal, as his story ends up largely being about his love for Jinx, his love for the world, and how he deals with Jinx's death and Heimerdinger's death.
I don't want to talk about Heimerdinger I don't like him I don't care.
I could talk about Mel and her relationship with her mother as well, the way it parallels Caitlyn's relationship with her mother, but this post is long enough as it is, so if I talk about that, I'm saving that for another day.
Geo!! Hihihihihihi!! thank you for the ask teeheehee smooches i love you
I was never meant to win is an unfinished 5+1 chapter fic where Ivan fakes his own death before Round 5 and escapes, while Till goes on to win ALNST. The title is from the song "partner in crime" by Madilyn Mei, which has a lot of lyrics that scream Ivan to me, including but not limited to "I'm about to die but I find the only thing on my mind is you" and "I know we're not the same, my heart's on the line" but um yeah anyways. It's not. a happy fic lmao
snippet from the third chapter :3c
yanno when you have a dream about your crush and its still depressing despite everything because thats who you are
Do you think Nyx tells Cas or anyone else about his encounter with Solei? (Also..what would you say happened after Nyx saw them?)
Nyx probably wouldn’t tell anyone, maybe Cas, right before their round, just because he doesn’t expect to win and he thinks that Cas should probably know (about Aurien, more than Solei, because she’s like a sister to both of them). Nyx knows that what he saw is dangerous- dangerous for him, dangerous for both Solei and Aurien, and he’s not going to mention that because he doesn’t want to jeopardize their chance at freedom, more than anything else. If it makes any sense, he’s just not the most forthcoming with information in general? He really only tells people he’s close to about things and even then, he’s not exactly verbose. If he told anyone, he would tell Dian or Lang (@pwippy), but even with them, he probably wouldn’t mention it because he knows that by telling them, he’s putting them at risk, and he only really trusts himself to keep the secret.
What happened when Nyx saw Solei below 👇
Even after Nyx blurted their name, they simply looked at him, their eyes eerie black holes in the darkness. They held Aurien as a pale angel in their feathery arms, bandaged hands delicate where they touched her, despite the blood pooling on the floor of the stage.
Nyx didn’t dare to try and approach them.
They were someone different, now. They were still Solei, of course they were, but it had been years since Nyx last saw them. Their hair was streaked with grey. They had talons instead of feet, ribbed and yellow like those of a bird of prey. He didn’t know if they recognized him or if they still held any goodwill for him. He could be just another target to them, and he wasn’t willing to take that chance, even for Aurien. Aurien was safe with them, Solei cradled her like the precious thing that she was, he didn’t have to worry about her.
Still, he said, “Keep her out of trouble for me, okay?” Solei blinked at him before they nodded, a jerky motion but still distinct in the dim. That was the last he saw of them, they picked Aurien up and disappeared into the night, leaving him behind.
Security found him standing in the arena, staring hollowly at the stage, and escorted him out after a brief interrogation. It was easy to lie to them, though, he’d been doing it all his life. When Nyx got back home, Oryon demanded to know where he’d been. He explained the situation and even after that, he was punished and put under house arrest for the next week because he broke his curfew. He didn’t mind so much- it gave him time to think.
(Solei belongs to @shakingparadigm and Aurirn belongs to @aurienneirua)
UM. DPS IVANTILL FIC??? HELLO??? YOU JUST CASUALLY PUT THAT IN THE TAGS OF A REBLOG LIKE THIS ISN’T LIFE CHANGING???
Fun fact! sometimes i specifically put insane shit in my tags when i reblog from you. because i know you're to see it. you see, I'm fucked up and evil and this is all part of my master plan- *is dragged off of stage by the cane around my neck*
But yeah. I watched Dead Poets Society w/my mom & dad because I love Robin Williams and afterwards my brain was like. ivantill go brrr. funnily enough now that i check it was on ivan's "birthday" that i was writingthat. happy birthday my favorite little bastard. anyways but yeah. it was mostly inspired by the scene where todd is reading and doesn't want to go out with neil and neil doesn't take no for an answer, snatching todd's book and running around the room with him. that scene is very gay to me. I remember being like "they should've kissed" and when I started writing the ivantill fic, there's a scene that's an echo of the original and they do kiss so you know. win.
I haven't worked on it since February but maybe next week I'll make some time to re-watch Dead Poets and try to get back in the groove, finish this WIP and put it out of its misery, neil-style.
In the Dark I'm Burning Light For You (That Way You Can Follow Me Home) (8895 words) by rock_with_googly_eyes
Chapters: 1/2
Fandom: Alien Stage (Web Series)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Mizi & Till (Alien Stage), Hyuna & Till (Alien Stage), Ivan & Mizi (Alien Stage), Ivan/Till (Alien Stage), Hyuna & Ivan (Alien Stage), Mizi/Sua (Alien Stage), Sua & Till (Alien Stage), Ivan & Sua (Alien Stage)
Characters: Ivan (Alien Stage), Hyuna (Alien Stage), Mizi (Alien Stage), Till (Alien Stage), Sua (Alien Stage), Isaac (Alien Stage), Dewey (Alien Stage), Original Characters
Additional Tags: Secret Relationship, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - College/University, technically at least since till is in school for part of it, Getting Together, Established Relationship, Literal Sleeping Together, Hurt/Comfort, Comedy, I hope I mean I think I'm funny, Ivan is a model/actor, Mizi and Till are both musicians, and Sua is a woman in STEM, because why not, POV Alternating, Implied/Referenced Drug Use
Summary:
It was during one of those times that Till sat down with his dinner and turned on the television, finding the right feed before turning the sound on. Chewing on his food absentmindedly, he watched the host talk to Ivan and his co-star about the new romantic drama that would be coming out in theaters in a week. By the time it was out, Ivan would be back home, and Till awaited that day impatiently. He was getting tired of takeout, of the empty and quiet apartment, of the pitying looks from their friends.
For a long time, Till never even thought of Ivan as an option, but after finding out that Ivan loves someone, Till's whole world changes. Whether that change is for the better or for the worse, well, who knows.
posted the first chapter of a fic that's been sitting in WIP hell for a good few months because I finally finished the scene that was holding it up! hope it's good/funny to someone other than me
