#romance vent

[colacat53]

It's hard falling for someone and then before you can even tell them you never see them again

In 7th grade I gained a crush on a girl I was really close with in elementary school but then covid happened and I never got a chance to tell her.

I planned to do it in a zoom call private chat but unfortunately due to an incident I was involved in in the beginning of the year most of the zoom chats were disabled and even if they had chats there we no private ones

I ended up never seeing her again and I thought that my feelings would go away but every time I think they're gone I remember how I felt about her and it hurts because I'll know I'll never see her again or tell her how I feel

At this point if I do see her again I don't care if she returns my feelings or not I just want my feelings for her to go away if she rejects me

I'm worried that these feelings will haunt me my entire life and even if I end up dating someone in the future I feel like they won't go away since I'm polyamourous

[crashedship-vents]

i cannot be in romantic love with her

i cannot

i’m just idealizing her because she’s the one person who i’ve opened myself up to who’s stayed, and it’s hard for me to do that again so i don’t

[prismalitesystem]

⚠️CW Romance Vent (Just processing things, everything’s okay dw /gen)

goodness, it’s honestly a little scary to love someone this much

that nagging fear that you’re gonna fuck something up and lose it

but i suppose there’s nothing i can do about it except my best

communicate, set healthy boundaries, give and accept affection as needed

and trust her to do the same

i refuse to let the fear of losing her overtake me and turn a small chance into an inevitability

[prismalitesystem]

that feeling when you finally realize you truly, genuinely, completely fell for someone two years ago

and the whole time you knew deep down, but you denied it, knowing that “it could never work out, i’ll just have to enjoy our relationship for what it is” because not only is she 5k miles away, she already has a girlfriend, and they’re not polyamorous or anything, so an actual romantic relationship could never work

but you’re realizing you really really fucking wish it would have worked out because you have really and truly fallen for her, and you’ve never found anyone else who made you feel like she does

and now you don’t know whether to tell her or not because you don’t want to ruin what you already have

yeah it’s not a good feeling.

[casviolet-blog]

white blood

so tired of it all / cant do it alone / said you’d always be my white blood.

dark hair cascades over his pale skin, casting aggressive shadows against his sunken eyes and hollow cheekbones. his lips are ghastly pale peach, the only pigment in his face that subtracts from the corpse aesthetic. dark eyes roam around the almost empty corridor, piercing into every person who steps into his vision. his eyes crinkle at the corners, fine lines that make him seem more like a real person rather than an illusion or a ghost of happiness. his eyes crinkle when he smiles, baring his white pointed teeth for the split-second before covering his mouth with his hand, a small insecurity he is convinced no one with a normal mind will notice. silence hangs over him easier than conversation, led phone screen illuminating his cold eyes as he effortlessly scrolls through social media- receiving no real gratification or happiness from the comments on his enchanting posts; he is compulsive and takes pride in time stamping all of his photographs.  sometimes this is the only thing that reminds me that he is a real person, seeing dates and times next to his hollow frame and dead eye-d selfies brings me a sense of relief. maybe we’re not meant to be near each other, two opposite magnets pushing away from one another with such raw aggression and need that people will stop and stare in awe, curious as to whether the experiment will work and the magnets will permanently separate. i met him in cupids month, surrounded by paper hearts and heart shaped chocolates. maybe this is why i see him as though i am wearing rose-tinted goggles, his pale skin illuminates the room and his dark eyes make my heart feel like the heaviest anchor in any harbour. the weight is comfortable and grounding, it reminds me that my heart is still beating and that i am always capable of making the wrong decision.