Scanning internet reactions, his speech seems to have alienated women and Jews, but I’d say he also missed a chance with all of us not familiar with the Poland Springs brand. If Rubio wanted to take his 2016 bid for President seriously, he should have used his spotlight to target other demographics left out of the conversation. He could have done this by choosing a different beverage.
3. Kool-Aid
Rubio could have given a shout-out to Nebraska by drinking the state’s official soft drink. Perhaps even signifying it as a metaphor for all the barriers he’d smash through as President.
8. Sazerac
This speech was delivered on Fat Tuesday — he should have pounded a few Sazerac in honor of New Orleans. Bonus points for going Mardi Gras and ending the TV spot by throwing beads at the camera.
15. Sizzurp
With BPMs dropping across the country, Rubio should have paid homage to the Chopped N’ Screwed community by sipping some sizzurp.
