The world was turning. Was it? Had the front door always been this color? She couldn’t recall how it actually looked, but right now all she saw were stars and rainbow colors. As dizzy as she could be, she had to grab every object on her way inside to prevent herself from falling face-first on the hard floor. She did know that the younger would be at her place, they had talked about it not too long ago and she had left some spare keys for her a week ago. Reaching the mirror that was in the hallway, she could finally see what kind of mess alcohol left her. Both bliss and joy, desperation and sadness. ‘Alcohol, my old pal. Like in a movie. Ridiculous.’ Her mind was in disarray. She questioned her earlier thoughts, was it really the alcohol? She’d bet a thousand on him, not alcohol. Oh, how she loved him. So much so that it burned in her chest whenever she thought about him. It was absolutely, one hundred percent, his fault that she felt this way. That she wanted to feel his skin on hers, that she longed for him and his touch, that she wanted him to return her feelings. She wanted it, him, so, so bad. But reality was harsh and this wasn’t a fairy tale.
“Soojung.” Jiwon could barely even produce a proper sentence let alone speak her name in normal fashion. It came out like a roar, almost. A groan. Perhaps even similar to a cry for help. “Hey. Soojung.” Looking up from where she was seated, the blonde hair suddenly seemed so familiar that all she wanted was to lay her head on her lap as she hugged her tightly. And that’s exactly what she did. Her body felt warm and usual, something she’d do every day if she had known this earlier. Her puffy eyes were bloodshed, red as can be, and like her heart-- they burned. Yet this time, instead of wiping the salty tears from her cheeks with her sleeves, she let them drop on her friend’s clothes. This man was killing her, and he didn’t even know.
She knew exactly what to do and while it could have sounded creepy and ridiculous to others, she didn’t mind doing it. It was winter 2013, freezing, but she saw her earlier. She saw her doing it. Jiwon saw her touching him in all kinds of ways, ways she’d rather not think about but would gladly do to him as well. The hands rubbing all over his body should’ve been hers, not... from this girl. She wouldn’t go as far as to hurt her, she wasn’t that messed up. Not yet, at least. So she took a step back and only took pictures. Who would have sex with giant windows and no curtains? They would, apparently. Why he would do such a thing with her, she wondered, she wasn’t anything special. Clearly he wasn’t in his right mind. Was he drunk? Well, probably. If he was thinking straight, he wouldn’t have picked this girl over her.
The picture she had covered in words from old markers she had laying around, spelling a loving “get away from him”, possibly one of the least threatening things she had done over the past months. What were these girls thinking? He was hers, not theirs, to keep. With the gloves covering her hands she managed to deliver the pictures to her house. She wasn’t very discreet. Why the hell would you post your full name, phone number and address on the internet? Silly girl. It somehow brought her joy, knowing these girls would go crazy the more pictures she’d sent them. Too bad she couldn’t stick around to watch their reactions. She didn’t want to get caught. He’d hate her. Maybe if she explained to him why she was doing this, he’d change his mind. She was all doing it for him. If only he’d actually notice.
His mind is somewhere in the clouds, the daydreamer in him taking over. What is he dreaming of? He’s not sure. There’s a form in the distance, the form of a man, Sehun can tell that much. That’s about all he can make out though. Well that and the piece of paper being held out to him. It’s all very real. The boy can feel the paper between his fingers. He can’t really make out the words though. They blur and stretch, squeeze and pixelate in his mind’s eyes. This goes on for what seems like an eternity until one sentence suddenly comes into focus.
I like the things you say, no matter what it is, and how you say them, like the way you asked me to kiss you or how you describe what risk you put yourself in to talk to me instead of just saying “yes I missed you”.
That’s when the spell is broken. There’s no man, no note, nothing aside from an empty gas station and Sehun, sitting behind the counter waiting for customers that won’t come because it’s 2:45 in the morning. No one comes by at the time of the night/morning, it’s one of the reasons he likes this shift. He can watch the clock in silence and get paid.
However, he does not like it when his mind wanders into the abyss. Because he’s still not sure what floats about in the darkness. He knows there’s something there, something he can’t quite remember. Truth be told though, he’s scared to remember. What if it’s bad? What if it’s just something horrible about himself or who he was before the accident? He doesn’t even want to fathom it, so he shakes the thoughts from his mind, forgetting about the note that floats down behind the desk sitting behind him that seemed to appear out of nothing.
she's in her dorm for once. hiding out was quite tiring and she missed the comforts of her mattress and pillows. penelope finds herself tucked under her covers, half asleep and it's only noon. her eyes were about to close and take her to a land of clouds when a paper falls on her face. an irritated expression scars her face as her eyes narrow at the thin piece of material covering her features. plucking the white sheet away from her, penelope scans through the written words. it looks like chicken scratch, but she doesn't mind (kind of). it's a letter to her from a certain pair of imps. a smile appears bright on her face as she begins to read, this is just what she needed after all.
" dearest penelope!
it's your favorite demon, panic! i just wanted to update you on several things back in hell. first things first, pain says he misses you even if he denies it. your father beat him up all of last week because he brought out the hercules merchandise again. idiot! -snickers- your mother is saying you should go home soon for another visit. she doesn't want you to keep fainting so often. remember to eat the pomegranate seeds that she sent you, it'll lessen the faint attacks. your father sends his regards as well. he wants to make sure that things haven't been a hassle for his lovely daughter. on the topic of your father's off spring, your older brother is expected to stop by sometime soon. be prepared, penny. this isn't the same person you saw a few years ago. if he causes you trouble, you'll write back to me, right? i know you'll keep it to yourself, so you have to write back. be safe up there, penelope. come back when you can. WHICH IS SOON RIGHT?!
love, panic
p.s. PAIN WAS HERE. HI PEN. "
she sets the piece of paper down next to her as her eyes start to water. despite the trip home with lucifer, penelope hadn't been home since. she missed the two idiots that kept her company post-breakup. she missed her mother's warm smile in the morning. she missed her father's subtle actions that showed that he missed her too. it made her wonder why she was still here at this cursed academy when she could be home. the young goddess was homesick, yet she felt miserable at elias just as she did when she was home. why wasn't there an escape this time around? she curls up into the fetal position, her eyes glassy with tears. her arms wrap around her legs and she doesn't feel like sleeping. there were too many thoughts now.
the paper is between her fingers again as she rereads the letter numerous times. she knows that she should of ate those pomegranate seeds instead of tossing them away into the trash. penelope had hidden the fainting problem away from everyone pretty well. they all thought she was taking a nap of sorts. sadly for her, it wasn't the case. she was supposed to be in hell in the winter. the poor girl wasn't meant to last on the surface during the harsh cold.there wasn't a soul that knew and she was going to make sure she kept it that way. a sigh fell from her red lips. those seeds were the only things connecting her to home. they were the chain that tugged her back every winter. she hated them. the red stain they left on her lips were a reminder of how she was meant to be caged in during the prettiest season.
then, there was the topic of her brother. her half brother to be exact. a bitter laugh fell from her lips as she rolled onto her back. big brother phelix was coming to elias. she knew that he hated her for multiple reasons. it was unfair. he was the reminder to her parents that her father was unfaithful. he was the reason why her mother remained silent for months when she found out. he ruined the image that penelope had of marriage. she didn't hate him though, resented him a little, but there was no hatred in her heart for him. there was a few glimpses here and there every once in a while when he would be in one of the rooms learning, but pain or panic would always urge her to move past the room before she could get a good look at him though. the servants running around the castle would whisper in the hallways at times about how much phelix hated her and how he would rule hell one day because he was a male. did those imbeciles forget that he was only a demigod and she was an actual goddess? it made her blood boil for an odd reason. if he ruled hell, then she would be free from the confinements that they made for her. but still, penelope couldn't leave him behind to rot. they were family after all.
closing her eyes, she let out a deep breath that she didn't know she was holding in. she would have to write back again soon or who knows what panic would tell her father. her fingers crushed the letter tightly before black irises fluttered open to stare at the ceiling of the dorm room. how is she going to survive?
