BOOGA :: Art car
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I lack the peace of simple things. I am never wholly in place. I find no peace or grace. We sell the world to buy fire, our way lighted by burning men. -Wendell Berry
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The only reason to do this stuff is for the relationships. My collaborators over the years on this project are among the core of my weird extended chosen family. There's no way to name names without leaving people out. Everybody mattered. The mark of family is that you still love each other after driving each other insane with unreasonable behavior because you are there to grow together. I believe that we all made something beautiful and highly improbably pop off this year at the burn better than we ever have before on any other project, after working together for years. I cherish all of these relationships deeply, and tending them was at the core of my burn this year.
This stuff is incredibly fun and incredibly hard and takes all day if you invest wholeheartedly in contributing to the event. As with most things in life, the bigger the investment, the more fun you have and the more you learn. My primary $$$ clients (I don't get paid for working on Thunder Gumbo) are also burners and producers who understand why I'm doing what I've done, and I'm very lucky to have them help make it possible. I lost five pounds, and have probably eaten about 200,000 calories since getting back to Reno six days ago. I gave a couple thousand dollars and a few months of my life and efforts to hard work on the project this year between helping produce on three major fundraiser parties (with two more to come this fall), a kickstarter campaign, a thirty five person camp (with kitchen / shower / shade / lounge / workshop / car parking), and an elaborate trucking, breakdown, and financial reconciliation process that is still going on.
The event wouldn't have been the same without investing in it so heavily-- sometimes the object of devotion isn't as important as the devotion to seeing things through in general, no matter what it takes. Even if it means that I was tending to my responsibilities to the point that I brought out a record player and a stack of vinyl, three decks of tarot cards, and a six foot inflatable hamster ball without using any of them once.
Like most difficult things, Burning Man is not for everybody. There's lots of goofy stuff about lots of the tribes that go, it's a pretty self indulgent event in a city that gentrifies steadily every year, some of the internal politics are extremely wack, it is expensive and dangerous and time consuming and classist and dusty. I acknowledge all these things and remain a fan regardless.
Every critique of Burning Man is true, and I honor the festival for being able to contain everything-- it is a Tantra, not a Sutra. It has, love, hate, beauty, ugliness, skill and lack therof, computer programmers who call themselves spanky and dress up as gay aliens, impoverished mystics, kind older people, children, fire spinners, burnouts, prodigies, trolls, real danger, injury, sex, death, cops, life, freedom, an FAA sanctioned airport and a functioning post office, dubstep, waffles. I guess I like that there's a little something for everybody.
My experience at the burn this year was extremely life affirming, but I feel no need to fetishize the experience. I was there and now I am here. It was a great party. There is no way I can give as much of myself to this set of tribal forces next year, having joyous demands on my time in the temporary city of New York like professional development and yoga teacher training, but it has been an incredible ride and I regret nothing. I am completely energized by all that has transpired, and am ready to make my entire life the best it can possibly be every day that I am alive on this planet.
[Shalin Scupham 20 Sept, 2015]
