requested | does this darkness have a name? this cruelty this hatred. how did it find us, did it steal into our lives or did we seek it out and embrace it? what happened to us that we now send our children into the world like we send young men to war, hoping for their safe return but knowing some will be lost along the way. when did we lose our way? consumed by the shadows swallowed whole by the darkness. does this darkness have a name… is it your name?
oh my god i have so many ideas for this but i’m gonna keep it relatively sfw at this point because i may or may not be writing this while at work. (i’d say don’t tell my boss, but joke’s on him, he doesn’t even work today haha.) if anyone wants a more nsfw fic later when i get off work, let me know and i can make that happen lol.
Wash — I’ll write a drabble of our characters showering/bathing together.
(Prompt list here!)
—
The safe house the cluster has holed up in doesn’t have a working shower. What used to be a shower is rusted over completely, the water coming out muddy at best. After much scrubbing, though, they do manage to get the tub they find to be clean enough to be serviceable. (The members of the cluster who are more used to luxury squirm a bit at the idea of bathing in something that they had just found, no matter how much bleach was use. But the other option is just not to wash, and given how many of them are living together at this point, that’s not really an option at all.)
After they get Wolfgang back, it takes him a few days before he has recovered enough to bathe. He is still sore and stiff, but he doesn’t want to be caked in blood anymore. (Despite the groan of pain he gives when getting up, none of them exactly blame him for wanting to wash. None of them wanted to be reminded of what had happened to him more than they had to be.) So that’s how Kala finds herself supporting his weight as they walk from his makeshift bedroom to what has been serving as the bathroom in the abandoned warehouse. There aren’t many interior walls left, but the cluster have strung up blankets around the toilet and shower area to at least give the illusion of privacy. Kala pushes back one of the quilts serving as a wall and guides Wolfgang inside.
She lets the blanket fall behind her, so they are alone. (Well, as alone as anyone can be in a warehouse full of people.) Wolfgang gives her a weak smile, but it’s clear he’s trying to hide how much pain he is still in. Slowly, she helps him strip out of his sweaty clothes and step into the tub. He eases down and leans back, gritting his teeth at the feel of the cool porcelain against his back.
Kala hears and winces. "Are you alright? Do you want to do this tomorrow instead?“ she asks, worry creeping into her voice.
Wolfgang shakes his head. "I’ll be fine,” he grits out. "I’d rather just get this over with.“
Kala nods and accepts his answer. She wonders if she would feel the same if she were in his shoes, or if the pain would be too much for her. She doesn’t let herself think too much about that hypothetical, though. Fear won’t fix this. What Wolfgang needs right now is someone to help him get back to feeling himself so he can be there for the rest of them, and Kala is more than happy to assist. she turns on the tub’s faucet and listens to the creak before the water finally starts flowing. She puts her hand under to gauge the temperature, and when it is warm enough she puts a rubber stopper in the drain so the tub begins to fill.
It’s not long before the hot water begins to soothe Wolfgang’s still muscles. As the level rises, he sighs contentedly and slowly leans his head back against the edge of the tub. Kala observes him with a small smile. He may be injured, but he is here and safe and hers, which is all that matters right now. Once she deems the bath to be full, Kala strips off her own clothes and slowly lowers herself in front of Wolfgang. Despite the soreness, he grins at her as she does so. She grabs a washcloth and dampens it, teasing him when she brings it up to start wiping off his face and neck. His pain eases as the heat seeps into him, and she can’t help but return his smile the longer she helps clean him up. (Without the dried blood there, she finally gets to see him as he truly is for the first time. Kala’s heart flutters.)
"You know,” Wolfgang says, leaning into her touch, “I could get used to this.”
Kala dips forward and gives him a quick kiss on the lips. With a small smile she says, “Me, too.”
I could use some reassurance! I saw a post on Facebook where app Netflix didn't get as many calls today. We need to encourage everyone to Keep on these people HARD! But anyway, yeah, tonight is kinda hard for me
Hi! Like you said, these lulls in activity can only serve to make us push harder. Keep in mind it’s Tuesday, and the beginning of this whole movement mostly took place over the weekend, so even if Netflix didn’t get as many calls today as it has in past days, it doesn’t necessarily mean it got few calls. Just fewer because people have been busier today than they were a few days ago. I myself haven’t been as active today because I had a final exam and a huge end of semester presentation, and I just got home. Of course we should promote this cause with everything we’ve got anyways to get those numbers as high as possible, but don’t get discouraged about the ebb and flow of participation. There can be way more factors affecting that besides people losing interest.
Honestly, I encourage you to pay no mind to anything unmotivating like that. BELIEVE ME, I know this is way more easily said than done, but keep in mind that we’re all doing this with no regard whatsoever as to how likely or unlikely it is that we’ll get a renewal. None of us are here because we think it’ll be easy. We’re here because you fight for what you love, no matter how easy or difficult it is to get. I’d be making just as much noise if this was twice or half as likely to happen, because I am giving it my 100% and that’s all I can ask of myself.
This will be the same level of difficulty whether we let those things make us feel discouraged or not. The difference is that if we let that discouragement reduce our activity and participation, if we let that feeling of hopelessness stop us from fighting, the likelihood of succes goes from “highly dubious” to “absolutely not gonna fucking happen”, because no one will be asking for it to happen.
We need to keep this effort up with just as much passion and enthusiasm and love as we’ve had so far if we want to really tip the scales in our favor. Channel that worry into your thoughts and your actions and let it fuel you instead of bring you down. We’re all right here with you <3 i’m sending lots of virutal hugs your way, please let me know if there’s anything else I can do for you
Because my Tumblr Crushes extension is being a royal bitch, and it won’t let me post any of my Crushes, I have to post it manually now...But anyways...my 2 favorite ladies are at the top, of course, and tvd blogs I’ve been reblogging from this past week and a half!
I have one more (I think). The prompt is Kala tells Rajan the truth about her feelings for him and that she's leaving him
oh my god this turned into a fucking monster so uh i hope you like it?
---
When the cluster have left London and are relatively safe,Nomi and Bug set up a secure server in their new safe house. Once they’ve donethis (and Nomi has assured the rest of them several times that yes, she’s sure it’s safe), Kala checks her email.
54 Unread Messages
She winces. For amoment, she wonders what would happen if she could turn on her phone and see howmany voicemails she has. Kala is almostgrateful that it’s too dangerous for her to do so. Nomi gives her a hug in understanding, thenleaves her to read through the emails.
Kala ignores the ones she’s received from work. At this point, she figures her job isgone. (It hurts a bit, but she knows sheis where she needs to be.) The firstones she reads are from her parents and sister. The start off excited, asking her how her time in Paris is. (Even reading the word makes her heartache. But she reminds herself thatWolfgang is safe and they are together now, and that’s what matters.) As time passed without Kala responding,though, the messages become more concerned. Blinking back tears, she takes a deep breath and opens a new email. She writes her family a short message,telling them that she can’t talk much right now, but everything is fine and notto worry. Even as she sends it, sheknows they won’t believe her. But there’snot much else she can do.
Last, Kala reads the emails from Rajan. There are not as many of these, although she’snot sure why she expected there to be. He was the one who had sent her away, after all. Still, the few emails he did send follow thesame pattern as that of her family’s. First checking in, then growing worry at her lack of answer. Rajan’s worry is not as much for her safety,though. It’s clear in his emails that hebelieves sending her to Paris was the last strain that their short-livedmarriage can take. (Kala’s not sure howto feel about him being right for all the wrong reasons.) She sighs, eyes wandering from the computerscreen to Wolfgang sitting on the other side of the room. He is still bruised, but he’s sitting with theothers rather than lying on their ratty mattress, so it’s still a goodday. Lito and Daniela are telling somegrand story, and Wolfgang has on that face he makes when he’s trying to hidejust how happy he is about things. Kalasmiles to herself. She can do this.
Kala asks Nomi for a burner phone. Nomi says she can do her one better, andpulls up a one use number on her computer and passes Kala her headset. “Are you sure you want to do this?” Nomiasks? Even without the blockers, she’salways been sensitive to others’ pain.
After a moment, Kala nods. “It’s the right thing to do.”
Nomi nods back, instructs her on how the phone programworks, and then leaves her to relative privacy. (There’s only so much privacy in a warehouse with almost no interiorwalls left, but it’s as enough that Nomi tries.)
Time seems to pass so much faster once Kala puts on theheadset. She knows the phone must ringat least twice, but before she knows it Rajan is on the other line.
“Hello? Who is this?”he asks, suspicion in his voice. (Right. The investigation, Kala thinks. She had almost forgotten, her own world having collapsed around her themoment the tazer had hit Wolfgang’s chest.)
Kala clears her throat. “Uh…it’s me,” she says. She hopeshe can’t hear her nerves through the poor sound quality.
“Kala?” Rajan asks, an almost reverence in his voice. She can tell he didn’t expect to hear fromher again.
“Yes.”
“How are you? Are youokay? I got a call from the landlord inParis saying you never arrived. Whathappened?”
She takes a deep breath. Wolfgang has noticed that she is talking to someone at this point, looksup to catch her eye. He raises aneyebrow. Kala doesn’t need theirconnection to know his unspoken question. Do you need me there? Another shaky breath, debating whether hispresence would make this easier or harder. She thinks about it for a moment, about what their relationship meansand how hard she has already fought for it. Kala nods.
“Kala? Are you stillthere?” Rajan asks on the other end.
“Yes, sorry. Just amoment,” she replies. Wolfgang excuseshimself from Daniela and Lito’s story-time and walks over. He stands behind her, wrapping his armsaround her shoulders. Even without thepsycellium, his presence gives her strength. Kala inhales deeply. “I can’tstay married to you, Rajan.”
For almost a minute, there is silence. She worries that the call may have dropped,but the program on Nomi’s computer says the connection is still there. Then Rajan finally speaks. “I should have seen this coming. A marriage can only handle so manysecrets. And to send you away when we’veonly just started living together –”
“No, that’s not it,” Kala cuts him off. She lifts her hands to Wolfgang’s, squeezingthem tightly. “I mean, that’s part ofit, but that’s not…I don’t love you.” The sudden admission surprises even her. She’s never admitted it out loud to anyone but Wolfgang before. She had hoped to give it more context, moreeloquence. But it’s out there now, andshe can’t take it back.
“I see,” Rajan replies cryptically. “Why not take the apartment in Paris, then?”
The noise that comes out of Kala’s mouth is somewherebetween a laugh and a sob. “It’s…complicated.”
Rajan is quiet again for a moment. “Is there someone else?”
Kala flinches. Shehad hoped he would at least let her build up to that. “Yes. But...he’s not the reason why I don’t love you. I can’t – Rajan, you are a great man. Even with…everything that’s happened, Ibelieve you are a good man.”
“But?” he asks, expectant.
“But I think I convinced myself that if I tried hard enough,I would grow to love you. And Itried. I really, really tried. I wanted so badly to love you….” Kala trails off. Wolfgang is stiff behind her, but he doesn’tmove away from her either.
“But you can’t,” Rajan concludes eventually.
Kala exhales a sigh of relief. “No. Ican’t. I’m so sorry.”
Rajan is quiet once again. Kala hates it. Her naturalinstinct is to fill the awkward silences with explanations, babbling on untilthe moment has passed. But she knowsthat she has to let this one stand. Shehas to give him time to process. Kalaleans back into Wolfgang. He softens,squeezing her hands for a moment to show her he’s still with her.
“I guess part of me know,” Rajan says at last.
“What?”
“I’ve told you before, Kala. I hoped so badly that I could love you enough for the both of us. And I wanted to believe that it had startedto work. But…if you cannot love me, Iunderstand. And I cannot keep you in amarriage you do not want.”
Kala smiles. “Thankyou. For understanding.” She takes another deep breath. “For everything.”
“Thank you,” he replies. “Thank you for being honest with me.”
She tries to ignore how that stings. Tries to remember Rajan still has his ownsecrets. (It almost works.) “Goodbye, Rajan.”
“Goodbye, Kala,” he answers sadly. Kala selects the disconnect button on thephone program and ends the call.
I agree with you about JMS. And besides, he did not travel with Lana for season 2 like did with the first season. Roberto Malerba, one of the other producers did. And Netflix never told him that it was about the cast not resigning. Just the bogus numbers excuse
There’s Roberto, plus I just don’t believe Brian and other cast members would have encouraged us to make noise if there were cast members who didn’t want to come back. They have literally called each other family. I can’t imagine that they wouldn’t have communicated to each other if they didn’t want to come back for whatever reason.