#sarkastically

[ghostantine]

sarkastically replied to your post: hehehe john makes a joke about getting dicked by...

I find the shadow of John’s fingers with the cigarette on his face to be rather suspect as well.

I would like to thank DC for getting me banned from tumblr

[chsesteinarchived]

sarkastically replied to your post: why is no one talking about the guy who gert...

Well, I was ignoring it because I don’t want them dragging in love triangle garbage. It was a cool nod but still.

lol tbh i would only see them doing a love triangle IF they brought in victor since it has some comic roots. 

but more than anything i can see chase getting jealous only to have gert telling him she only wants him. 

[findafight]

I'm eventually hoping to write a fic about it, but I've a headcanon that Gert is super into conspiracy theories and cryptids and the only people she can really convince to go with her are Chase and Molly. Molly because adventure! Chase partially for adventure and partially because he'll do anything for Gert. It's my Scooby Doo au. The others eventually get dragged in too. They complain while Gert, Chase, and Molly are living for it.

dfhjakbsoifaons SCOOBY DOO AU I’M LIVING THANK YOU FOR SENDING ME THIS??? I LOVE YOU Alex is ready to set some mcfreakin TRAPS guys... somehow...they always end up adopting a cryptid they find into their group. Like... Old Lace was how Gert started looking for all these things because a freakin dinosaur was in her backyard and so obviously the next logical question was “what else is out there that they’re hiding?” Chase does the thing where shaggy jumps into scooby’s arms with old lace when something jumps out

So Molly is super on board because dinosaurs! Adventure! Road trip!! what if this is their gap year after highschool and Mols comes for her summer break? and Chase is also like...dinosaurs...cool...road trip with Gert...also cool... and like Molly begs the rest of them and Nico is interested in the magic folklore around and Karo is down to explore and Alex is like “do any of you besides Gert have a plan??” so he goes to spend time with his friends and also make sure no one dies. Thanks, Alex.

They. They buy a motorhome. At first it was tent camping but if you've tent camped you know....it gets.. old...fast...and so wet when it rains...regrets... so they splurge and get a small motorhome so they can have a little indoor kitchen and bathroom (FOR EMERGENCIES ONLY) and they spend a week painting it with the design Karolina came up with.

Xavin and Victor are some of the “””menacing creatures””” they heard about but when they come across them they’re all like....oh. you. are harmless. do. do you want to join us in our merry little motorhome road trip with us? It’ll be fun? we already have a witch and an alien and a dinosaur and a mutant and two dudes who...know stuff?? and they’re both like. yeah cool y’all are crazy but sure. 

[shiparmada]

Prompt 3: “we’ve been engaged to be married since we were three but this is the first time we’ve met and your portraits really don’t do you justice” au

(This is a million and a half years too late and I’m real sorry. But I hope it was worth the wait!)

Baze knew this day was coming since he was old enough to understand what “betrothed” meant. He had been three years old when his mothers had both left him with his grandparents to meet with a neighboring city, to discuss the terms of his betrothal with Chirrut Îmwe, whose parents had recently passed, and his grandparents were looking to make an arrangement with another strong family to ensure nothing would be lost were Chirrut to die as well. It was convenient. Baze never gave it much thought. When his mothers had returned, they brought back a portrait of Chirrut. In a way. It was a picture of the boy, but it was how the painter expected Chirrut to look like after his 20th birthday, so that Baze would know who to expect. Baze had had to sit through a painting done of him as well, and when he saw the final product his nose had scrunched up. It really looked nothing like him at all.

Sometimes Baze wished he had had a copy of the portrait made so he could remember what it had looked like, so he could tell how accurate the painter was.

The portrait of his betrothed sat in the living room. The man in the painting was alright, round face with dark eyes staring directly at the painter. Straight long hair was pulled back into a short pony tail, and he had a bright wide smile. He was average, Baze had been with more handsome men already. But, on the other hand, at least his betrothed was not ugly. The week before Baze turned twenty-one, Baze spent a lot of time sitting in front of the painting, staring at it, trying to understand more about the man he was supposed to marry. If there was anything to gain from staring at the portrait though, it was not coming to him.

And now, one month after his twenty-first birthday, the day was here. The wedding was set for next week. The thought made bands tighten around his chest, could feel his freedom sliding away as the shuttle flew up, landing in front of their house.

Baze stood still as the ramp lowered and extended, settling in the sand. Dust puffed up and Baze’s vision was distorted as it flew into his eyes. He fought the urge to rub them, fought the urge to cough as dust tried to fill his nose. He would not make a bad first impression. He was a proud man, and they would see a proud man.

The man who walked down the ramp though did not meet any of Baze’s expectations: he surpassed them. The roundness that was in the portrait in his living room was gone, shaved into sharp edges and straight lines. His hair was short, very short, and his eyes were pale blue, covering his irises and pupils. The only thing about him that was the same as the portrait was that smile. A wide bright smile that split his face and showed his gums. The man in front of him was not average, he was handsome.

That was an understatement, Baze inwardly corrected, the man was fucking hot.

Despite Chirrut having no sight, he stopped right before Baze, smiling brightly in his direction. “Hello,” he said, and he bowed deeply in front of Baze, who’s tongue had turned to lead and his mouth had dried out. “It is a pleasure to finally meet you, I am Chirrut Îmwe.”

Baze was silent, staring at the man. On his left Baze’s mother cleared her throat, and he earned a sharp elbow in the chest. He turned to glare at her before he swallowed and looked back at Chirrut. Swallowing did not help, but it was all he could do. “Hello, Chirrut. I am Baze Malbus.” The smile seemed to spread, an act Baze would have thought impossible if he had not seen it. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“And you as well,” Chirrut responded. Chirrut held out his hand, and his hand hooked into Baze’s elbow. “Come, we have a wedding to plan.”

[hobbitunderthemountain]

sarkastically replied to your post “the durins: *are dying* me: hey can y’all…. not do that please”

Fili and Kili were my favorites after Bilbo, and whenever I read the book I would pretend that other people had died instead of them because I was not okay with the loss.

I remember re-reading the book after the first movie came out cause I was like I need to refresh myself!! and now i have all these new favorite dwarves!!! and then I got to the end of the book where they get like maybe two lines of ‘oops they died’ and I was like WHAT IS THIS BULLSHIT, EXCUSE ME??? MR TOLKIEN??? CAN YOU UHHH EXPLAIN THIS?????

[hanamakimakoto]

Thank you for reblogging!! @sarkastically @ask-themightiestdad You guys are awesome!! <3 

[cedarwaxwingsandberries]

That would be awesome! What size are the Star War playing card prints?

They come in three sizes - 

Large: 8x12

Medium: 6x9

Small: 3.5x5

[shiparmada]

Prompt 4? I think I've lost count. 🔥 - the fire alarm went off at 3am and it’s cold outside

(This one was a lot of fun to write I’m not going to lie. Enjoy!)

“I hate you.”

“No you don’t.”

Baze let out a loud huff, pulling his robe closer to him. It was too early in the morning, and it was the middle of winter. No snow fell, but if there was enough moisture there would have been. His toes were freezing inside his fuzzy slippers, and they weren’t allowed back inside the hotel until the fire department deemed it safe. This was why Baze hated vacations. “It’s your fault we’re here.”

“I didn’t set off the fire alarm,” Chirrut said. He’s wearing less than Baze, standing in his pajama shorts and a tank top. He was not so much as shivering, damn him. “And you agreed this would be a good place to honeymoon.”

“I did not,” Baze said, shrugging out of his robe. “I said that it would probably be less busy than another place.”

“That is the same as you agreeing,” Chirrut countered, and he paused when he felt Baze’s robe set on his shoulders. “Baze,” Chirrut said, grabbing the lapels of the robe and pulling it around him. “You’re going to freeze without your robe.”

“I’m wearing more clothing than you are,” Baze pointed out, moving close and kissing his head. “If you really don’t want the robes give them back.”

Chirrut huffed, pulling the robes closed around him. “You’ll tell me if you need it back?”

“Of course,” Baze promised. Chirrut knew he didn’t believe him, but he didn’t argue with him anymore. “What do you think happened?” Baze asked him, sliding his hand over Chirrut’s back.

“Hm…” Chirrut hummed and then slowly leaned into Baze, resting his head back on Baze’s shoulder. “Perhaps someone decided to have a late night smoke in their hotel room?”

“Maybe,” Baze said, nodding. “Or maybe they decided to make breakfast on a portable hot plate.”

“Maybe no one did anything. Maybe there’s faulty wiring, and it decided to catch on fire.”

Baze chuckled and he shook his head. “Only you would pick a hotel that has faulty wiring in it and tries to burn us down with it.” He shivered as the cold seeped into his clothes. He tried to focus on the warm patch that Chirrut created with his body, but he could sense Chirrut frowning.

“Baze, take your robe back,” Chirrut said, pulling away to shrug out of the robes. “You’re cold, I’ll be fine.”

“I’m fine,” Baze said, wrapping his arms around Chirrut and pulling him close against his chest. “I’m sure they’re going to let us back in soon. You can keep me warm for now.” Chirrut let out a huff and leaned his head back against Baze’s chest.

“I don’t want you to be cold because of me.”

“I’m not cold,” Baze lied, kissing his head. “Come on, what other things set off the alarm?” Baze put his tongue between his teeth, clamping down on it so he could avoid chattering teeth.

“A dragon,” Chirrut said, trying to keep the pout of his voice. He almost succeeded. “Someone snuck a dragon in in their suitcase, and it got out.”

Baze laughed, unsticking his jaw so he could answer, “A dragon? Where did they get the dragon from?”

“They’re wizards,” Chirrut said easily. “All wizards travel with dragons.”

“I’m learning something new every day,” Baze said, pulling Chirrut ever closer.

Chirrut let out a huff and he pulled away, taking off the robe. “Put this on, please. You’re freezing, I’ll just steal your heat. Just… wear it, please.” Chirrut swallowed and he let out a long breath, pushing the robe into Baze’s chest.

Baze let out a breath. “It’s not going to help much, you should wear it.”

“Baze.”

Baze looked at his new husband, at the concern that knitted his eyebrows together. Baze knew he was not winning this one. “Alright,” Baze said, pulling his robe from Chirrut and sliding it on. It was warmer than wearing nothing. Before he had finished sliding it on, Chirrut was back against his chest, arms tucked between them to keep them warm. “I’m sure they’ll let us back in soon,” Baze said, his arms wrapping around Chirrut, kissing his head.

“I’m sure they will,” Chirrut agreed, pressing into him. “For now we will be cold.”

Baze chuckled and he nodded, squeezing Chirrut gently. “What should we do when we get back inside?”

“Mm,” Chirrut kissed over his shoulder. “I think we should take off our clothes, get under the blankets, and cuddle up until we’re not shivering anymore.”

“Beautiful.” Baze let out a long breath, resting his chin on Chirrut’s head, smiling when he heard his new husband hum against his chest.

“I’m sorry,” Chirrut said to him, raising one of Baze’s cold hands and kissing the palm gently. “I know this is not where you wanted to spend our honeymoon, I know this is not what you would rather being doing right now.”

“No need to apologize,” Baze told him, moving his hand to cup his jaw gently. “I’m here with you. There is no where I would rather be.” He paused then. “Though I would prefer to be warm right now,” he amended. Chirrut laughed in the halo of Baze’s arms, shaking his head.

“Me too,” Chirrut agreed.

“Excuse me!” A small thin woman came out of the double doors, waving her hands to get the guest’s attention. “Excuse me! The fire department has cleared the building, you’re all free to go back to your rooms! I would like to apologize for the inconvenience! Thank you for being patient!”

Chirrut grinned and he pulled away from Baze, grabbing his hand again. “Come on, let’s get you out of that robe!”

Baze laughed, shaking his head and moving forward to follow after Chirrut.